What a Numpty

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b0508

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Was up at the horses today on my own.I was using a crate to mount my horse as it is a bit easier.When one of my legs left the crate to get onto the horse the crate fell from underneath me and I then ended up in a heap on the floor.With my horse looking at me to say 'What the hell are you doing down there you silly cow' I have now got a huge bruise on my leg and a bit of a bruised ego.Just glad there was no-one there to laugh at me.Am i the only one that things like this happen to
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Crates can be dodgy. The plastic weakens after awhile - a friend's foot when through one once when she was mounting up and she couldn't pull it free easily, she ended up with a nasty wound. My short term memory went to pot when i was pregnant with my fisrt child and I tried springing into the saddle when i was late for my lesson, without checking I had done the girth up. Of course, I hadn't, the saddle slid around and I ended up in a heap on the floor with my mare looking at me as if to say, "Get up, you're making a show of me."
 
no! The most 'numptiest' thing i've done ( i was so glad i wasn't being watched) I was carrying 2 buckets of water across the yard, stood on my shoe laces and went flying getting wet in the process! oh my..., i can laugh now, i did then but only me could have done that!
I have walked into many things, tripped over, put rugs on backwards, fallen off lorry ramps and much more.... iam a big numpty!!!
 
I fell off the gate I was using to mount share horse the other day
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I swear the horse rolled his eyes at me whilst continuing to wait patiently for me to get on
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I laughed at myself after the pain died away .. My mare stood still and looked as if she was laughing at me.Things like this always seem to happen to me .
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A few years ago I did a Handy Pony class at a PC event, and was hoping to do well because I was riding probably the most bombproof pony you could find. Well, you had to go in, ring a bell, then get off and put on some shorts. I pulled on the shorts, but they were massive and as I pushed up to get back on they fell down, holding my legs together! I was let lying on my horse, tied up by a pair of shorts. Eventually, rolled off the other side with a very bruised ego and a large laughing crowd!
 
Your all making me feel better now as i laugh at your numpty moments.Got a bump on my leg and my mums already sick of me moaning.No sympathy for me
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Hee hee, this thread made me laugh, so glad I'm not the only numpty around. Though I'm learning, because my horse is very spooky, if I'd tried to mount and fallen off the gate/crate, whatever, she'd have done a runner sharpish. You don't do things like that twice around my lass!
 
I've managed to wallop my head off the partition in the lorry TWICE in the one day, the second time was enough to actually pretty much knock me out - ended up slumped on the floor. Serves me right for wearing a baseball cap...
 
ha ha they are some good stories.
At an old yard our tack rooms were all next to each other in a barn, there was a small step as you walked into your room, i was changing my boots, had one boot on but the other was in my room so i thought i would hop over the step to retrieve the other boot, i jumped but not high enough and proceeded to fall flat on my face, worse thing was the person next to me was in their room and we only had wire to seperate so she saw the whole thing! needless to say it was round the yard in 10 minutes!
 
I have managed to throw myself right over the other side when mounting - not once but twice! 15 years apart but I've still managed to do it twice!
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The first was on my old boy - he'd always walk off when I got on so I used to aim for a bit further foward than ususal, until one day when he decided to walk off backwards instead! The second time a friend's husband gave me a leg up onto my 16.2 - I'm a bit lighter than his wife, my horse is a bit smaller than her 17.1 monster and he was a bit over zealous with the shove - he threw me right over the top! I was lying on the floor in fits of laughter and my horse just stood there staring at me like I was mad! I used the mounting block to get back on.
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I did this but was on a wobbly chair and fell underneath the cob. He just stood totally still looking down at me as if to say "God, what a nutter!".
I remember at the time thinking that my mare would never have stood still and so was proved right when OH did exact same thing 2 days later...I really had meant to tell him not to use the wobbly chair - oops!
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My horse walked away from the mounting block just the other day and i was still attached to the styrup... would be funny if it wasnt on a 17hh over concrete!! Fortunatley although i nearly fell i managed to pull myself up onto him!
And my old cob the day before someone came to try him walked off whilst i was vaulting on bareback and bridleless!! Landed hard on my bum and he just stood still and looked at me as if to say - dont sell me you stupid woman or i will start to be bad so you cant show me!!
 
Haha some of these are hilarious.
I've not done anything like that while trying to get on a horse, but the other week I stood on an upside down bucket to reach the lightbulb which needed changing.
The bucket snapped and there were bits of bucket all over the place.
 
I was using an upturned giant bucket the muck skip sized ones to get on, been using it for ages on our yard. Went to push off it and it broke, foot went right down to floor. So left foot in stirrup, right foot on floor stuck in a bucket.

Pony gives withering look whilst I try and extract right foot (not as easy as you might think
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I wanted to ride Toto bareback, so I led him up to the arena fence so I could jump on, he was a little too far away but I though nahh I will make it! But I couldn't quite jump far enough and ended up sprawled over Toto's back, would have been alright if he hadn't decided to walk off! I managed to get hold of the reins and turn him in a little circle, and he stopped after a few circles. I went to swing my leg over, but with a bit too much gusto, and went straight over the other side
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To make matters worse it was all caught on video, and you could hear me squeal as I fell! Hahaa
 
non horse accidents but whilst doing a tb test at work, moving from one site to another in a "Rhino" atv, I stepped out of the vehicle but didn't lift one foot high enough to clear the rim on the floor of the machine, so ended up flat on my face infront of the stockman on the road. I'm still laughing at myself! Then there was the time I was walking outside my office when I stood on the end of a trailing shrub and caught my other foot in the loop I'd created. Once again on my hands and knees, this time my boss was looking at me a tad surprised, but had the good grace not to mention in when I, somewhat embarrassed, went back to the office.
 
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