What does 'bonding with your horse' mean to you?

I'm not sure I count it as just trust in an everyday sense, I've had horses I've known 5mins trust me about something scary, but that's not a bond in my view. And I think horses are all so different, there's not a definitive guide to what a bond is. My mare isn't the affectionate sort, she just gives off the impression that unless people are doing something in her interests they are a bit pointless. But I get cuddles, & if for any reason she's not seen me for a day I get full on greetings. Other people can stand with feed buckets & she just mooches over with the attitude of 'you are merely a human slave, you will wait till I get there as I am so much above you'. The one time she was in danger, close to collapse from blood loss after a dog attack & neither the vet, experienced ym & other experienced adults could get anywhere near, I could. I vividly remember having to describe her wounds to the vet because her manic rearing caused the blood to pump out more when he tried to get close enough to look. Then treating her following vets instructions from a distance. Next day when she was out of shock, she let vet in the stable, provided at all times I was between them. Yet even that first 24hrs, she let me prod & poke. She ran to the back of her box when my best friend came to see her, & wouldn't move till she'd gone, at around 7am next morning. Two hours earlier I'd been sat on the floor sponging encrusted splashed blood from random places & treating the minor wounds which weren't priorities at first. She's also on more than one occasion gone the extra mile to help me out. I'm also the only person to have ever got near her lay down,or seen her lay in her stable, except my daughter if she's with me. We just know each other inside out, & for all the horses I've known & loved, & even had really strong bonds with, I don't think I'll ever have the same bond with any other horse like I do with her. I think we're just ridiculously in tune with each other, to the point that our almost invisible body language can appear uncanny.
 
I do not like the word "bond" but then, I do not like plenty of other words!
However I do like the concept.

I feel I have bonded with Ned. He is my horse and I am his person! Even before he was given to me I felt that and obviously YO did too. I feel the type of love for him, that I do for my family and friends, he is very much a part of my family, as is the dog and the cat was too.
It's taken a long time, but I think we're both at a really good place :) I can finally hack him alone and he's the leader of his mini herd! He looks fab and he's clearly a happy horse. When I first saw him he couldn't bare hugs and kisses, he would do anything to avoid it! Now I think he likes it, he'll follow me around his pen while I muck out and once in a while he'll nudge me and ask for fuss :)

Honestly, he makes me go all silly and girly!
 
Yuk - I hate the term, it's a bit new agey for me.

Horse has to see you as a leader so that they have confidence in you.

Always love how a really brilliant horseman, like Mark Todd, can get on a strange horse and jump it around Badminton. That is some "bonding" !

Sometimes that trust can be quite "blind" I think. My old mare is undisputed boss of my little herd of three and the other two will follow her regardless, even when she does silly stuff. Like there is "something" lurking in the hedge, so we shouldn't go for dinner yet. :confused:

It is also easy to mistake affection for cupboard love too. LOL - try not feeding them for a week or two.

But having said all that am humbled and moved to tears when they go above and beyond for me. I endurance ride, so I ask some big questions some days and they just give and give. That's special. :)
 
I've got slated for using the word " bonding" before so choose to use the word trust. The first 6mths I had my mare I went up to yard, rode and went home - always groomed etc but I suppose I could say I didn't get emotionally involved! Things changed when one day she decided she wouldn't be caught ( on 30acres ) and I litterally sat in the middle of the field holding a bag of carrots for 1.5hrs until she decided if I put the headcollar on it meant I wasn't too bad if there were treats involved. Fast forward 3mths , she recognises my jeep when I pull up @ yard, she will stand in her stable and not leg it out the door once I am there! She puts her head down now when I'm putting bridle on , when I'm putting poles up in arena she follows me about like a lamb, she stands @ gate when I turn her out until I can't see her anymore( 6mths ago the minute I took the headcollar off she would gallop across the field ) , she hasn't trampled me despite a very dramatic fall where she had nowhere to go but decided to cat leap over me instead. Heart on sleve and prob too much info but I think she thinks I'm ok to trust!
 
I have "bonds" with 3 horses.

With one of my horse, our personalities just mesh really well. I trust him to the end of the earth and he is the same with me. He is not an easy horse to get along with, nor is he an easy ride. My friend who has been riding for years longer than I have and is a way better rider struggles to get the same performance out of him as I do. I know what he will do before he does it.

My other horse is an old soul, very kind and gentle. I can't really describe our "bond" is but when I initially got him, I was planning on having him as a project horse to sell on. Everyone that saw us together said the same thing... "he likes you, you two have a bond, this horse is meant to be yours." He comforts me when I am sad, and he tried his heart out completely for me.

The other is a horse at work. He is a young stallion and is a right cheeky little so and so with both me and everyone else at the yard. Every time I pull up, he calls out and comes galloping up to the fence. He does not do this for anyone else. When I go and get him from the paddock he comes up for cuddles and will nibble my hair. Again, everyone who sees the pair of us interact has said the same thing... "this horse loves you, you are his person," even his owner has said this. He is by no means a one person horse, is affectionate to everyone and has impeccable manners (but has his cheeky moments too).

I get along with 99% of horses I come into contact with and like them all but with these 3, there is something extra. :)
 
My RI says I have a strong connection to one if the RS horses. Is that a better word or even the same thing?
To it would mean that trust is established between horse and rider and the horse feels that it is safe when that human is with them. I try not to get too attached as I don't own any if the ones I currently ride.
 
I'd say my 10yo daughter & her pony, a bossy little NF alpha mare, are bonded. The pony won't even let yard staff catch her (has been known to chase them off) but comes cantering up to my daughter, who can do anything with her.
 
some you take to, some you dont.
the mare I have just sold was great, I would say I had a special bond with her, she was one of those characters you couldnt help but love. I went to visit her in her new home and she had transferred that love over to her new owner, it was plain to see.
I have the trust of my newest one, she arrived unhandled and uncivilised at 5 months old straight off her mum. Ive spent time with her and she is a friendly little thing now, whinnies when she sees you, 'helps' with poo picking and wants to be around you.
Some ponies just draw you to them, others want their space and I respect that, as long as they behave and do as asked thats fine by me. I dont feed treats so if they want to chat its because they want to, not cupboard love lol
we had one exracer who craved human attention, he was beautiful though and everyone loved him as he loved everyone.
 
Absolute trust to me, and affection too. I had an incident with mine where I had a fall and was knocked out cold whilst out hacking. When I came to, horse was standing almost on top of me, shaking like a leaf, obviously terrified of something, but instead of running he came to me.
Turns out he had been shot with something from behind, propably an air pistol.
He could have run for miles as we were in the dunes, but he chose not to, that to me, is a bond :)
 
I would say I have a 'bond' with my yearling. She follows me around the field, even leaves the herd to come with me of her own freewill and always canters up to greet me at the gate. I hope she always does it.
 
To me, it's when the horse know's you (out of all the people who he sees) are his person.

My old pony was not very affectionate (unless you had a carrot) and if he was healthy, fed and content he'd totally ignore me. But as soon as something was up (haynet had run out or he'd injured himself or was choking) he would seek me out either by coming to me or calling to me until I came to him. He knew I was his and would make things better again.
 
Ok, found the "proper" meaning to bonding....

It's when your 2yo bites everyone else but you and everyone who tries to come near you, even other horses!

Naughty girl!!!!
 
I had a great bond with my last horse. He was a grumpy git and generally hated everyone, but I was definitely "his person". It's difficult to explain, we seemed to know each other inside out and clicked.

The new one I've had for about 9 months and he's a lovely pony. Get on great with him, he has bags of personality and is incredibly affectionate but he's like that with everyone. He adores people and is more like a puppy than a horse. He's a complete affection whore, will stand to be fussed by anyone all day long, loves the person who fed him last. If I go away for a couple of days, when I returned the YO or her groom are his favourite people and he's forgotten about me. He's not fussed who brings him in, turns him out, feeds him or rides him, so long as someone does. Same with other horses; he couldn't care less who he's turned out with, he just likes everyone (the old horse only liked certain other horses too) and wants to be cuddled by everyone. So we don't have a "bond" as such, or not anything special, because he wants to be friends with anyone and everyone.
 
peteralfred said:
For me, its about trust-when you get to that point with a horse that you can do stuff without there being any bother, even if they aren't sure about it because they trust you and you trust them.
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Ditto this. For me, it's all the silly stuff. He knows what I expect, I know how far I can push him, he trusts my judgement and I trust him more than I have any other equine. It's a partnership.

It's being able to put him back in a situation that completely blew his mind before we properly "clicked", and have him be a total angel. It's grooming and tacking up with the stable door open, untacking and leaving him stood on the yard with no headcollar, leading him to and from the field with no headcollar. I don't lead him to or from the school / mounting block - he follows. It's having him choose to stay with me, when there's no food involved. It's asking something big of him, and him trying his heart out. No arguments, no battles. You know when you click.
 
chestnut cob said:
The new one I've had for about 9 months and he's a lovely pony. Get on great with him, he has bags of personality and is incredibly affectionate but he's like that with everyone. He adores people and is more like a puppy than a horse. He's a complete affection whore, will stand to be fussed by anyone all day long, loves the person who fed him last. If I go away for a couple of days, when I returned the YO or her groom are his favourite people and he's forgotten about me. He's not fussed who brings him in, turns him out, feeds him or rides him, so long as someone does. Same with other horses; he couldn't care less who he's turned out with, he just likes everyone (the old horse only liked certain other horses too) and wants to be cuddled by everyone. So we don't have a "bond" as such, or not anything special, because he wants to be friends with anyone and everyone.
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To me - that's really lovely! That's a happy contented pony who has no reason not to trust others and has a true love of people. If only they were all like that.
 
I'd like to think I have a really good bond with my boy. He's got the nicest, most gentle nature and would rather stand with me and have cuddles and kisses than eat his hay :p

I taught him tricks (cause he's cool) and can lunge him without a lunge line, just by using my voice and when he's loose schooling he is so much fun, I sound like a complete and utter fool but he responds to me like a little dog! :D I tell him to jump down the grid, so off he goes, pops down it, and then I tell him he's a good boy and he comes back to me for a pat and a scratch, so cute! :D

I love spending time with him as he's just so funny and I definitely think he has the same sense of humour!

A lot of you may know I have been through a pretty tough time recently, and just sitting with him in his stable was the best theropy ever. He would just stand with his head in my lap, as if he knew what had happened. Might just be me being soppy but I just felt it was his way of telling me he was there for me :')

I do think we have a bond (of some sort) and I think everyone can with their horse just by spending time with them and understanding them. They're a lot more intelligent than we think
 
It's simple! the ultimate bond is when your horse chooses to be with you. It's more about what your horse thinks of you, will your horse stay with you if you didn't have a rope on him? Horses are horses at the end of the day and not many would prefer to be with a human rather than other horses, so the degree of bonding is more about rapport and respect, more than how many cuddles they will accept or how high they will jump.
Trust is only the first step.
Ps I was not inffering to the post above, I was typing when that was posted, Sounds like you do have a good rapport and respect with your horses RPC Equestrian.
 
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Its when after bandaging his very sore leg and foot, he holds your jumper so you can't leave.

when it doesn't matter where you stand on a cross country course he will find you on the way round and look at you

When he turns to look at you before the first jump on the show jumping

When he is being ridden anywhere by his other rider and pecks or hurts himself on a jump and stops holds the sore part up and calls to you.

Its when you collapse out riding throw up all over his shoulder and he just turns round and walks home.

Its when he moves himself as you fall to stop you hitting the electric fence and takes the shock himself

I have the unreplaceable perfect horse
 
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