what to do about yard bullying

Angua2

Angua2

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I do apologise for this long and rather garbled post, but I am so so upset.

First of all I will need to explain a little background

my livery yard is part of a farm that is now a 80 horse plus yard surrounded by a number of light industrial units.
In the middle of this are two houses, one that is the YO and the other is rented.... currently to a family with small childern.
The livery yard is run by 3 different YM. One of which is related to the people in the house.

A few weeks ago I was approached by the YM related to the house because he claimed I was speeding, which I denyed as the lane into the farm and passed the house is so rutted that it would damage my suspension and after one set of repairs I do not want to do more. On my denial he lost his temper and said that if I hit his granson that he would "have me".

Sunday they finally did something practical about people passing the house by putting a rather severe speed bump there.

Today the same YM calls me over to inform me that I am still speeding passed the house and that on Sunday evening I was going passed so fast that they saw me smirk (! explain that one to me!!).

Anyway, I am still maintaining that I am not speeding, and he looses his temper, spitting as he is talking and waving his hands about so feeling threatend I walk away. He goes to follow but realises this time that there are witnesses.

I have reported his behaviour to the farm office and my YM, but they cannot do anything and I really don't know what to do.

If you have got this far and not switched off then definately cookies and beverage of your choice coming your way
 
How awful. What makes them think it's you - do they actually know which is your vehicle? What speed does the lane sign state you should be driving at?

I'd be moving - what an awful place to have people like that....
 
It all sounds too big and too complicated I wouldn't want to be on a yard that size at all and tbh after that I would deffo move.
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I would complain to the yard owner, after all they live in the same place and would know that you are not speeding.
Does this man have any history of bad behaviour towards other clients? If so then you will have more clout if a lot of you get together.
 
I've been to Angua2's yard and I can honestly say that, having driven along the drive she is referring to, unless you want to deliberately do some serious damage to your vehicle, then there's no way that you could speed along there.

I, too, would say move, but I know Angua 2 and I am well aware that there is a real shortage of decent yards and decent grazing in that area, so moving is not as easy as one would hope.

If only you lived nearer to me G - I could recommend a couple of places in this area.
 

I wouldnt get into an argument with him from now on as your only fuelling his fire if he's picking on you, I'd take a friend up to the yard with you on a few occasions so you have a witness, then he might back off a bit and let it lie eventually.
Are you 100% positive you have never just once gone past just that little tad bit fast (when I say fast...I mean faster than he expects you to...don't mean your speed demon lol) which has now got him listening out for you every time you go past? does your car have a distinctive sound, loud exhaust pipe that sounds faster/noisier than other liveries cars? you know what some people are like, they will accuse you for ever more if you have done it once, in which case you might be better of apologising and saying it wont happen again.

Agree talk to the other YN's before it gets way out of hand, the sooner you bring it up the better.

Hope you sort things out, good luck, otherwise I'd telling them you have to move yards as you are being bullied etc.
 
I feel very sorry for you. You shouldn't have to put up with that sort of behaviour. My suggestion would be to try and document any more of this type of behaviour, see if you can have a friend accompany you and or record anything you can ( secretly) on a mobile phone or something.

Not that helpfull I'm afraid other than as others have suggested, and try to find another yard or place to keep your horse.
 
He obviously knows what he is doing is wrong because he stop’s his behaviour towards you once there are witness, I cant to seem to understand why he is doing it as there doesn’t seem to be anything he would gain by it. Did you mean in you description his is related to the YM or he is one of the YM’s?
If I were you the next time he approaches you and starts accusing you of all sorts, obviously declare that it is not true, and that he has no right to speak to like that, and if he has got a problem with you report you to the yard officer. Because at the end of the day you haven’t got anything to hide and that he’s got no proof. The benefit is you went to them first and you have got witness on your side as they have seen his behaviour for themselves.
You mention is your text
“Today the same YM calls me over to inform me that I am still speeding passed the house and that on Sunday evening I was going passed so fast that they saw me smirk (! explain that one to me!!)”
Don’t go over don’t give him to opportunity to treat you like crap out of ear shoot from everybody else, if he want to talk to you he can talk to you in front of everybody, if it still doesn’t improve say to him I am going to file a report for harassment and then see his tune change.
 
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So just out of interest - how fast mph do you normally go on that lane?

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The max you can do down that lane is about 15mph you could hit 20mph at a push if you wanted to bottom the car out or do something strange to the suspension.

This morning he was claiming that I went over the speed bump at 30mph, and on my denial said that either I have a serious problem or my speedo is broken.

I will be having a look see what is about because a Faro mentions I don't have a lot of options. I did speak to my YM as it is not fair when he brings other people into this, but she was a little more adament about me staying. It may be that I may have to move to a stable block where there are always others about
 
There is a big difference between speeding (per the law) and going faster than is sensible. Have you tried just slowing down to keep him happy?
 
This sounds horrid, I would say look for another yard - does someone have a similar car to you and they are getting mixed up? Anyway, sounds like a losing battle if the other YM's aren't willing to do anything. You are a paying customer and they need to remember that - they should be aware of the dangers involved in working wth horses.

So much for customer service - he is treating you in an appauling manner!
X
 
Next time he asks for a word with you just say, calmly and politely to talk to your YM.

Treat it like work if you have a problem with a member off staff you would take it up with there line manager so you are only asking him to do the same. If he queries this just tell him you feel threatened by his behavior and would prefer him to go through your yard manager.
 
I have been down that road, and I had to go about 10m/h as the road is horrendous - if you had gone down at 30m/h most of your suspension would be still at the yard.

Doesnt sound like you can do much with this YM - he has convinced himself that you have been speeding. Perhaps try to keep a low profile for a while and hopefully he just forgets about it? And make sure you are only doing about 10m/h so there is absolutely no way he can think you are doing 30m/h.

I know the area well, and there is definitely a shortage of yards, let alone decent ones!
 
I would slow down to 10mph to keep him happy. Where I used to work, the limit on the single track lane was technically 60 - if you were doing more than about 5mph then you were in danger of hitting another car or horse coming around the bends. I had a fair number of clients and liveries who had to be reminded of this fact on a number of occassions, some denying flat out to me that they ever drove too fast, when horse and I had ended up in the hedge to avoid them earlier the same day.
 
I would drive up his lane and passed his house at 2 miles an hour, that will give you plenty of time to give him a little wave.


I suspect this is the knock on effect of an argument he has with your YM. This is for them to sort out between themselves. Speak to your YM as this is not on.
 
Thank you all.

TBH since the first confrontation I have made sure that I have crawled passed the house... any slower and I would be stationary!!. Since they installed the rather vicious speed bump on Sunday, it becomes a little bit of a moot point.

I was so glad today that there was witnesses as up until now I don't think anyone had actually realised the extent of the problem!
 
How awful for you.
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It sounds like this guy could be a little bit loopy maybe?
I think drive as slow as possible and keep a low profile for a while, i hate bullies! Makes my blood boil.
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Such a shame you couldnt get hold of a rally car and then show him what speeding really is down the lane!
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