What to do with your stuff when your horse dies?

Sorry for your loss. I have never made anything from my dear horses who have passed away over the years. Somehow it really doesn't appeal to me to make things from tail hair etc. I prefer to just have the memories and old photos. That's enough for me.
 
I keep anyything useful "in case" I might need it again. I do use a lot again, and some things I sell on quickly. I might keep a clump of hair with the intention of making something special, but the outcome is I have an old shoebox of hair, like a serial killer. I treasure my photos, perhaps a few favourite rosettes and trophies, a few personalised saddle cloths I just cannot part with. I don't get ashes back as I have moved a lot so my special places for scattering are far and wide around thwe world and want to end up surrounded by ashes but I do want to spend my life surrounded by animals.

My "think about it later" pile is an entire small garden shed. I went in there a few days ago actually and dug around and had a laugh and cry and pulled out a few things that in retrospect I kinda need rigth now + a few things to give away to friends.
 
Firstly I am very sorry for your loss.

Re the stuff, I think it partly depends on whether you have other horses/intend to get another one, or if you are giving up altogether. When I lost mine in 2024 I knew she'd be my last so nearly everything was given away or thrown out. After years of ownership there were many black bin bags of very tatty stuff that no one would want. The other liveries got all the rugs, grooming stuff, mucking out stuff etc. the only thing I sold was my barrow which was only weeks old.

I kept some mane and tail hair but I have no plans to make it into anything. I didn't put it with previous horse's hair as A would have bullied her 🙈. I still have her bridle and saddle - I think I have some crazy fantasy that there is another wee horse out there that would be a perfect fit for my lovely old saddle. But in reality that's not going to happen.

( I laughed at the serial killer box MissTyc - that's what I've got too)
 
We lost 2 oldies (32and 37) in 2024 and 2025. We have kept tail hair and a token amount of ashes, made into a resin horse shoe for each one. I still have tack and loads of rugs, because I can't find anyone who wants them and it feels wrong to take to the tip.
 
I lost my big grey boy a few years ago and kept a lot of stuff. In fact I paid for a storage unit for a couple of years, so I didn't have to go through it all. Eventually I bought a new horse and most of the stuff came back into circulation. I still have quite a bit of tack to sell and finally feel able to do this now.

I would second the idea of piles - chuck it, sell it, hmmm think about it. I didn't do keepsakes as memories and photos were enough for me.
 
Dazzled89 said:
Hello,

I guess I am looking for some reassurance here because I am second and third and fourth guessing every decision I make.

One of my horses passed away about a year and a half ago, and another a few months ago. I have one more who is very old at 28 and I'm not planning on getting another horse.

I feel pressure to have these Pinterest-worthy keepsakes, jewelry made out of tail hair and cushions made out of rugs, but in reality most of the rugs are mouldy and the result of being in a damp mouse ridden storage container for years. I've just bust into tears because I've tried to make a cushion out of a rug and just failed miserably. And the rug still smells even after washing 😩

Everyone talks about all the things they kept and made out of their horses things, but is there someone that can just reassure me that I don't need to do this, and I won't feel terrible the next day if I decide to get rid of things? I have tail hair, a shoe, infinite photos and memories. Part of me says this is enough, and part is screaming NO you have to keep all saddles bridles rugs grooming brushes fancy dress costumes from 2005 etc. or it means you didn't love them and you might forget them! 🙃

Grief is getting in the way of rational thought, I'd love to hear from some other horse owners <3
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My horse died in October and the lady who cared for him cut a piece off his tail and plaited it. She then made a montage of his photos and framed it.
I just kept my crop., I felt this was enough.
I gave all his other bits and pieces away
I had had him for 15 years
 
Dazzled89 said:
Hello,

I guess I am looking for some reassurance here because I am second and third and fourth guessing every decision I make.

One of my horses passed away about a year and a half ago, and another a few months ago. I have one more who is very old at 28 and I'm not planning on getting another horse.

I feel pressure to have these Pinterest-worthy keepsakes, jewelry made out of tail hair and cushions made out of rugs, but in reality most of the rugs are mouldy and the result of being in a damp mouse ridden storage container for years. I've just bust into tears because I've tried to make a cushion out of a rug and just failed miserably. And the rug still smells even after washing 😩

Everyone talks about all the things they kept and made out of their horses things, but is there someone that can just reassure me that I don't need to do this, and I won't feel terrible the next day if I decide to get rid of things? I have tail hair, a shoe, infinite photos and memories. Part of me says this is enough, and part is screaming NO you have to keep all saddles bridles rugs grooming brushes fancy dress costumes from 2005 etc. or it means you didn't love them and you might forget them! 🙃

Grief is getting in the way of rational thought, I'd love to hear from some other horse owners <3
Click to expand...
I’ve not really kept anything personal from the three I’ve recently lost. I’d never have any memory jewellery bracelets etc. Horse shoes or locks of mane:tail. Funny enough , it’s the rugs that I’ve found harder to let go of. The hair is still on the underside. Their distinctive smell lingers. I’ve used them to cover up the big round bales.
 
I sold the saddle and quite a few bits at an equine car-boot like martingales and girths that had no sentimental value. Other stuff I gave to friends. I kept a box full of stuff including a nice bridle, stud kit, a complete grooming kit, etc but to be honest whenever I come across the box in our storage area I feel very, very sad.

I didn’t keep hair but there is a horseshoe from every horse that’s lived here nailed to the wall next to the tack room door. That’s a lovely reminder of the stable’s history.
Giving stuff to friends who might use it made me happiest.
 
I gave up horses and sold most of my stuff on Facebook marketplace/ebay. I recently came across a box of old rugs and they went on vinted

I do have a bag of saddle pads, and a box of bits and pieces on the wardrobe such as his treat ball he loved/likit holder, his bridle and headcollar in a really useful box on the wardrobe

My favourite rug is under the bed, after being professionally cleaned

He didnt wear shoes, so I dont have any shoes

I do have some tail hair, but not done anything with it, some is in the box of his bits, the rest in a drawer

I wouldn't wear the jewellery day to day and while I love the in the wild wood sculptures they are way way over budget, I couldn't justify that cost

I opted for group cremation, as i didnt want the huge urn and the problem of what to do with his ashes

I do have a painting of him, and some framed photos, but tbh didnt have the same love for him I have/have had for various cats, so dont feel I need to make the tail hair into something if that makes sense.

Its also nobody's business what you do with YOUR memories/items, do what is right for YOU

We dont have the space to keep a load of stuff ill never use again either and it was quite satisfying selling most of it bar the most used, sentimental items. E.g. his saddle was nothing special, just a synthetic thorowgood, and no space to keep it, so on ebay it went
 
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It’s all just stuff at the end of the day - but some stuff is important to us and that is so individual, sorry for your loss ❤️

I kept Figs racing card, passport and his prize rugs/sashes/big show rosettes. I had the latter items made into throws (by my local tailor) and cushions professionally (rosette memory cushions on fb). I have all his show plaques too but I never figured out what to do with them!

I also had a set of shoes from the short time he was shod, one is as it was and I had the other polished up. I already had a bracelet from his tail hair from years back but I did take some of his tail hair for a friend to do with what he wanted (he hacked him for me in retirement).

I sold everything else. I’d rather have the money and move on, but that’s just me and after all I was the one with nearly £3k in vets bills.

I did keep his field headcollar but only bc it was too rubbish to sell but too good to chuck and Rooni is always destroying his!
 
I donated the decent things is rugs and saddle to a horse charity.
I kept some rail hair but have yet to use it.
Have her bridle still.
 
I lost my boy in August last year . My daughter had a bear done for me with some of his older rugs , and I have some tail hair . I have sold most of his rugs and thrown some things out and the rest is a "deal with it in the future " pile . I am not having another horse but just not ready to part with everything yet.
 
I sold everything I could when my old boy was pts. Some bits I kept for my other Exmoor (headcollars and so on), or gave away to a horse charity, but all the tack went once I established it wouldn't fit the new horse. From him I had a pendant made by Tailend Jewellery. Occasionally I find the odd thing I've missed (I found an old shoe and the shell of a hoof boot last year), but I haven't intentionally kept anything. By contrast my friend still has all the tack from a horse she had pts about 15 years ago! All going mouldy in sheds/storage. A sad waste of extremely good tack (she liked her Stubben at the time).
 
Dazzled89 said:
Hello,

I guess I am looking for some reassurance here because I am second and third and fourth guessing every decision I make.

Everyone talks about all the things they kept and made out of their horses things, but is there someone that can just reassure me that I don't need to do this, and I won't feel terrible the next day if I decide to get rid of things? I have tail hair, a shoe, infinite photos and memories. Part of me says this is enough, and part is screaming NO you have to keep all saddles bridles rugs grooming brushes fancy dress costumes from 2005 etc. or it means you didn't love them and you might forget them! 🙃

Grief is getting in the way of rational thought, I'd love to hear from some other horse owners <3
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Bless you! This is the worst side of social media, the pressure to conform to some perfect picture and feeling (or even being) set upon when you don't. Look at it another way. What will you actually DO with all that stuff? Where will it go? What will happen to it if something happens to you, who will have to deal with it? Will it actually help you with your memories? If you have good answers for all those, then fine, keep it.
I have owned (and therefopre lost, one way or another) over 40 horses in my life (so far). I make sure I have a photo of each one, and I revisit their memory with that if I feel I need to. If I'd kept all their stuiff, I'd need another house.
The memories you make with them, the time you spend with them, will always be more precious and more personal than any keepsake.
 
I think memories are the best memory, a few photos to trigger those.

I have been in horses for 35 years, I've sadly lost several horses as I've also had a habit of taking on older / ones with issues from friends of friends to give them a nice end.

I have several bundles of black tail hair on the top of shelves in by feed room that I'm now a bit hard pressed to work out who's was who. I am sure that doesn't make me a terrible person.
When we move I'll probably leave them there

I did make a nice fruit bowl from the shoes of a particularly special boy - the likes of which I'll never ride again. But that was a one off.

It maybe that clearing out might help with your grief. A charity might be very welcoming of the things that you won't need and what a lovely way to remember them by, helping other horses.
Don't look on it as getting rid, but look at it as those rugs or saddles going on to help others.
 
I have a bracelet made out of tail hair and I have kept some things like my best show bridle. Most things I managed to sell at secondhand sales and when I was left with rugs that couldn't be sold, but I had been using I put them up for free on a local Facebook page and had about 6 enquires and got rid of all of that, and I was very glad I did. I gave some things away to use for the horse I ride.

I have a sack full of old leather I don't know what to do with. Ultimately I could go down to t he local household waste site I suppose. But this isn't just from one horse, it is from 60 years of pony and horse ownership.
 
We're all different and whatever we choose to do is absolutely fine. I lost Archie in Oct 2024. I was lucky in that all he shared all his useful stuff with Wiggy as they were very similar sizes and builds so I didn't have to make a decision on what to do - Wig has even been using his saddle since I got him in 2022 (Arch retired in 2020) and Charlie wore it in between them. Things like cushions or blankets made out of rugs don't appeal to me (I don't even keep rosettes - it's just a bit of ribbon and cardboard - and often tell competition organisers I appreciate the thought but don't need the rosette so they can re-use it) and I'm a bit creeped out about the thought of cutting some of their tails off after they've died. It's a bit like keeping your child's baby teeth, I totally appreciate it brings comfort to others but it's not for me.

I've never really been sentimental about 'stuff' or even his body - I donated it to the local vet school as he would probably be a very interesting case for them, riddled with melanoma externally but never showed any sign that they were affecting him internally. I don't know what they found as you don't get any updates once you've done that and although I'm curious occasionally, I don't desperately need to know. If I find that he was actually really compromised and just hid it really well, that would be far more distressing than not knowing. I don't feel I need 'things' to remind me of him, all my memories are locked in anyway and he gave me plenty, he was quite the character! I know others feel differently and that's ok.

I think the only thing I might ever be sentimental about is that saddle - all 3 of my horses from Archie onwards have worn it (even though my 20 months with Charlie weren't the happiest). I've been sitting in it for 21 years and I feel like it's moulded to me and wouldn't fit anyone else. Quite what I'd do with it after Wiggy (I think he'll be my last horse) I don't know, but I might well struggle to part with it. Equally though, leaving it in a cupboard for someone to get rid of after I've gone doesn't seem right either so if I do keep it, I'll have to do something with it. Hopefully it's a long time off yet!
 
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