What would you do?

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vanessahook

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I have a small dilemma, other people's opinions would be helpful.
At the minute i work full time in the legal field and keep my horse at full livery and im still living with my parents. I have a lovely partner and we are saving for a house, but as we live in the south east we really cant afford to buy much and im worried about being able to afford my horse once i have a mortgage. As some of you know she isn't an easy horse either and i constantly have doubts over keeping her!!
Anyway the dilemma comes about cos my paretns have said they are thinking about moving to France and if i want to go too they will get a place with loads of land and stables and set up a yard. Im quite keen in principal but i really dont think my partner wants to go.
So what would you do? Stay in this country and make your way by yourself in a steady job that provides a decent salary or take a big risk and possibly have to leave your partner?
 
Depends how much you think of your partner
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Bit of a toughy - whatever you do you'll wonder if that grass would have been greener!

Bit of soul searching is needed but when in doubt do noubt. Only you know the answer unfortunately xxx
 
i personally would be off to france like a shot looking at land and yards - but then its my ambition to have my own yard, so if someone offered it to me id be off im afraid.

It depends how much you want it and how much you love your partner.

On the otherhand - if he loves you enough would he not consider taking your needs into consideration and moving out to France? You shouldnt have to stay just because of him (just trying to play devils advocate here).

Hope you and horsey are wel btw x
 
What does your heart tell you to do? how much do you treasure your OH? Is owning your own yard in France going to make you happy? You could look at sharing your horse or going DIY
 
Yep agree with F.
I would go with what felt right for me. Depends if you can live without your current partner. If you really WANT to go to france and have your own set up then go for it.

Men come and go
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encourage parents to buy something in normandy and keep the horse there cheaply - ride at weekends - stay here with partner and job and no livery to pay - sorted.
 
Firstly, can you speak fluent French? Are there openings for you get a decent job out there? If so, GO!! I would! I certainly wouldn't put my life on hold for a boyfriend.
 
Thanks for opinions so far. I would love my own yard and to get out of the rat race. Im very much in love with my partner and cant imagine going without him and just my parents.
I cant speak French but willing to learn!!!
 
Ask your BF to give it a try for a year, if you would really like to do it.
Its so difficult to look into the future and see whats right all you can do is try things.
My husband has always supported me to do the things I wanted and I the same, its what strong relationships are built on.
 
If you are in the SE there is no reason why you and your BF couldnt continue your relationship albeit somewhat changed.

Dont let a boyfriend stop you - if you really do want to go and do this then he should be behind your decision and not making you feel guilty about even considering it.
 
Go to France, ask BF to go with you! He can give it a try, who knows you both may love it or hate it, but at least you will have given it a go together!

You dont have a house yet so you have nothing to lose!
 
Well in my opinion I would stay with the boyfriend you love and aim at long term buying a place of your own with land.

You clearly have a good job so I would stay with the job that you know rather than wonder off to France.
 
I love it that most people would go and ditch their man, it makes me laugh us horse girls are so cut throat!!!
Imagine if the decision meant leaving your horse, you would all say No Way!!! ha ha!!!
 
depends how much you want your partner but if you are even considering going i would say go as he cant be all that to you or there wouldnt be any question of what to do hope your happy either way good luck
 
I think if you really do love him and he is not just a bf but more a "life partner" then I would say try and work it out so that he comes, or something.
 
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