What would your horse say if it could talk

The Little Girl: Pleeeassseee let me come with you...pretty please...you know you love me?..please i want a groom *cue big pleading eyes* yey, scratch time! :D Your back is just so perfect to scratch my (bony) chin on :D
(When riding) Will you please stop riding like a sack of potaoes! And no i don't want to "shift it already" when im walking, walking is leisurely ok?! Right now we're trotting this is boring lets canter, oh please let me canter you know its more fun!;) why should i "work my backend properly" it is FINE. Oh you boring lump not more circles :( (Or) Whoopee canter :p what you want me to stop already, but it's so fun :(

The Spotty Brute: *sigh* guess its time to "work" haha FOOL why would i come to you? ok fine lets go...la la la la ooh more grass!! Mwuh haha can't stop me can you, nom nom :D:p Will you COME ON lets go already (after just being tied up) HURRY UP!!!
(When riding) OMG did you see that?! Oh you're just blind there was clearly a monster in the bush that was going to eat me!...No i don't want to "calm down" this speed is perfect, of course its "collected enough" you're clearly rubbish i'll show you how its done..so stop pulling on me/circling me to slow down ok! I know BEST!...So we're jumping :cool: but the jump is clearly different :eek: omg you are not going to make me jump that, its scary!! AAAHHH!! (leaps at least a foot above what was necessary) weeee that was so fun!! CHARGE!! Lets go again!! :D
 
Cherrytopfirefox said:
The Little Girl: Pleeeassseee let me come with you...pretty please...you know you love me?..please i want a groom *cue big pleading eyes* yey, scratch time! :D Your back is just so perfect to scratch my (bony) chin on :D
(When riding) Will you please stop riding like a sack of potaoes! And no i don't want to "shift it already" when im walking, walking is leisurely ok?! Right now we're trotting this is boring lets canter, oh please let me canter you know its more fun!;) why should i "work my backend properly" it is FINE. Oh you boring lump not more circles :( (Or) Whoopee canter :p what you want me to stop already, but it's so fun :(

The Spotty Brute: *sigh* guess its time to "work" haha FOOL why would i come to you? ok fine lets go...la la la la ooh more grass!! Mwuh haha can't stop me can you, nom nom :D:p Will you COME ON lets go already (after just being tied up) HURRY UP!!!
(When riding) OMG did you see that?! Oh you're just blind there was clearly a monster in the bush that was going to eat me!...No i don't want to "calm down" this speed is perfect, of course its "collected enough" you're clearly rubbish i'll show you how its done..so stop pulling on me/circling me to slow down ok! I know BEST!...So we're jumping :cool: but the jump is clearly different :eek: omg you are not going to make me jump that, its scary!! AAAHHH!! (leaps at least a foot above what was necessary) weeee that was so fun!! CHARGE!! Lets go again!! :D
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You are without doubt the best horse whisperer ,communicator ,I have seen. I believe every word.:D
 
Something like this;
'mummy, mummy, mum, mum, mum, mummy, mum, mum, mum, mum, mummmmmmmyyyy, mum,, mum, muuuum, mummmmyyyy, mum, mum, MUM'
Me- 'WHAT'
'loves yoooooooo, whatcha doing?'
Me- :rolleyes:

When ridden;
'what? can't'
Me- yes you can
'nope cant'
Me- yep you can, try
'nope cant, too hard mum'
Me (growls)- TRY
'what like this?'
Me- yes exactly like that, perfect why the friggin fuss?
'whoop look at meeeee, lets do it again!'
Me- no we are going to do this now
'oh why?, I liked that thing we just doneded, I can't' ...................

:rolleyes:
I love him though! :D
 
Blue eyed boy.... 'Do you know how long this haynet/feed bucket has been empty? If only I knew the phone number for HAPPA you'd be in BIG trouble! ...'whaddaya mean laminitis?.....I feel fine, just fill the nets! :mad:

Baby boy....' Look mum, I've got another cut/scrape/bite/kick....oh look it's that nice vet lady back to see me again' :D
 
'mother what ARE you doing'

'sod them- why aren't you cuddling ME??? Don't you love me anymore?'

'mum. Mum. Mum. Mum. MUM. MUM! MUMMMM!!!!!' (whilst bopping me with his snozzle)
Me- 'what?'
Rob- 'I'm so BORED mum- cuddle me'

Followed by- 'where's-sa ma carrots!!'

And if I'm ever cross/ upset at something 'but mum I'm a good boy!! Why u upset?'
Lol

:):):)

And of course- whilst ridden- 'let's go!!!)
:D:D:D
 
My mare in the avatar used to have the habit of turning to greet ( me in particular ) flashing her long eyelashes in an extravagant manner - similar to ( going to show my age here) the lovely Fenella Fielding saying "Hell-lo" ....... cor that brings back some memories!
 
Mike007 said:
You are without doubt the best horse whisperer ,communicator ,I have seen. I believe every word.:D
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Haha thankyou :D:p but my horses are just so easy to read :rolleyes: very obvious body language such as the spotty brute pawing, yanking on the lead rope and generally not standing still when he's tied up - hence the "HURRY UP!!" lol :rolleyes:
 
"Hmm, hmm, hmm... (singing) On the road again.... hmm, hmm, hmm. Just trotting along, on the road agai-ARGHWHATTHEEFFISTHAT?! Ohit'sokit'sjustaleaf.
Hmmm, hmm, hmm, (singing) trotting along with my person on board.... hmm, hmm, hm-PUDDLE! PANIC,PANIC!
Er, what you doing down there mum?"
 
Mmmmm, pear....
Mmmmmm, polo....
Mmmmmmm, scratch under the mane...oh yeah, right there, ooh yes
Mmmmmmmm, fit mare....
 
Echo - that's mine, that's mine, that's mine, that's mine too (and after being separated from Abe for a couple of hourse - Abbbbbbbeeeee where are you, hello I missed you, but if you tell anybody that I'll bite you!)

Archie - play with me, play with me, (and if take Echo or Abe away - don't leave me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I is only little) and any excuse when gets told off by Echo or Abe but I is only a baby kiss kiss kiss and I is very cute
 
Mick - you really don't feed me enough. Trust me, i know when i'm full and that's never. So what if im a cob and iv a bit of a belly? I know you SAY you're doing it for my own good but im wasting away here...if i stand behind this field shelter you can hardly see me! now let me into that hay store!!

Belle - i don't like rugs! how many times do i have to show you, if you try to rug me up i WILL try to bite you. Now go away and leave me alone
 
Mickey in the field: no, you come here to me...do you have food? No? *SIGH*

Mickey in the stable: ooh do you have food? Just a saddle....*SIGH*....ok

Mickey on way to school: Do they have food? Those people over there? No? *SIGH*

Mickey in the school: CANTER now?! Woohoo! (then at every corner after that and on every circle) CANTER?! Can I?

Mickey out hacking: Can I grab food? Me: No Mick, hack not a buffet. Mick: *SIGH*

Mickey at a show: I WANT THE GRASS NOT MY STUPID HAYNET!!!! *SIGH*
 
hmmm..generally along the lines of:

field:
"ohh heyyy alright muuum got sooome foood? ahh okay well bring the hay down put it in there thanks because i have no grass and i'm obviously wasting away by the day you dont love me enough to put me in the grassy paddock next door..ooh yeah itchy spot just there mm ok i'm going now bored" *walks off*
(although she's pleased she was moved into a grassy field recently :p)

and while she naps before going in the school (every time!) i can imagine her as:
"walking down the field, do la la la. coming to the school-ah heyy! no. nope. not going in. nope. dont kick me! i'll back up more! didnt bring your whip did ya? suckeerr! yeah you can smack me on mah butt with your hand if your like it dont hurt. nope. stop kicking me i'm not going in. no. no. noooooope. no. *growls really loudly at her* oo stressy! caaalm doowwn! what's your problem?! *walks in without a problem* now where was i? oh yes, do la la la, la la la....
 
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