What's going on?

arwenplusone

arwenplusone

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Joined
25 January 2007
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I haven't posted much for a while, but during the bad weather I found myself lured back to the dark side... :)

I have to say, the forum feels like a very hostile place at the moment.
I have read a number of threads which all seem to be deliberately argumentative & people seem to be jumping on to see how 'witty' (read:nasty) they can be, in some sort of bitchy one upmanship.

Now, there will always be one or two posters who are like this & variety makes the world go round & all that (and occasionally this is pretty funny) - but it seems to me that this is now the vast majority.

We are all at different levels of ability on here, from happy hackers to serious competitors, but the way I read some of these posts, you'd think we were all Mary King standard.


Haven't we ALL at some point been a novice, asked a stupid question or taken photos/videos that we thought were funny and then regretted it? So why the 'holier than thou' attitude from so many people on here?

It seems to me that a lot of people don't know the difference between straight talking/good advice and downright rudeness.

It's a shame because there is a lot of good knowledege and experience on this forum that we are not making the best use of. Can't we all try and actually harness this?

Disclaimer: this post is NOT intended to start an argument - I just think we should make the forum a happier place! :-)
 
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I think an awful lot of people, especially people with horses, especially me lol, are in a bit of a bad mood this winter with the weather so frustrating so early and all the problems that go with it, and also money is getting so tight and people are worrying about jobs. It lowers patience levels and people's effort levels required to sugar coat answers on here.

Plus there are a lot of nutters about. :D
 
I have come to the conclusion that horsey people hate any hint that others may be enjoying themselves (without causing any harm to the horse, which is of course another matter) and that if they spot any actual fun going on they must immediately kill it with nasty, patronising comments. God forbid that someone might actually see riding as a fun hobby, rather than the hugely important, on a par with actually ruling the country, world will come to an end if someone cracks a smile pursuit that it actually is:rolleyes:
 
^^ Hehehe :D

You are so right. And I for one tend to take life too seriously and need to be told to lighten up now and then.

I think there is something in the idea that the bad weather has made some of us grouchy (not me, obviously, I'm perfect in every way). I find the less I ride the more I post! And the more I post the more I'm likely to get into trouble :o Maybe this is true for others too...
 
I think its the weather, the lack of sunlight, the lack of direction at this time of year - enough to make anyone a bit snappy - not just horsey folk! But I agree, there are some very tetchy people at the moment (not just on this forum!) and it makes for rather uncomfortable reading.
 
I think no matter what forum it is, you always have the people who support and then there are always the ones who jump on any little thing.

Personally i hate it, i mean it's good to discuss and help for the better, but as a previous poster said, there are those who use the straight talking excuse. It can put people off, it puts me off. I try to keep an open mind and if any was to disagree with me, i appreciate tactfull constructive help and advice. I'd hate to instead have an arguement errupt and for any inexperience to be shot down.

It can be daunting, especially as a novice. But it's nice knowing you can voice your opinion and get the help. It does nothing for someone to be shot down and made to feel silly. Everyone starts from the bottom.
 
It is rather awful sometimes, perhaps once the Olympic games are over we can hire the stadium and just have a massive HHO brawl. Can you imagine it?
 
The Rebel Reindeer said:
It is rather awful sometimes, perhaps once the Olympic games are over we can hire the stadium and just have a massive HHO brawl. Can you imagine it?
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It's not hard to guess who some of the main contenders would be, though it'd be interesting to see if they'd be as forthright (I'm being extremely polite using this term) when not hiding behind their computers ;)

aaaaaand cue onslaught!
 
Steorra said:
Count me in :D We could have those things you see at fairs where two people stand on podiums and batter each other with foam sticks.
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I think they'd prefer to use 'bunny huggers', happy hackers, vegetarians and anyone who doesn't share their school of thought a whole lot more than one of those giant cotton cotton buds :D
 
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lh1975 said:
I think they'd prefer to use 'bunny huggers', happy hackers, vegetarians and anyone who doesn't share their school of thought a whole lot more than one of those giant cotton cotton buds :D
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Well I'm up s*** creek then..vegi and 'happy' hacker, good job I don't do fluffy otherwise I'd be toast. ;)
 
cobgirlie said:
Well I'm up s*** creek then..vegi and 'happy' hacker, good job I don't do fluffy otherwise I'd be toast. ;)
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*Rebel Reindeer advance books some lions to toss the veggie, happy hacker to *

"and do I see the word cob :eek: in your name?"

*increases order for lions*
 
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Firstly: Everyone's different, when we hit bad moods, or get unreasonable, it's for different reasons, not the same, corporate one. I'm sure the bad weather is making a lot of people grumpy, money worries, colds, flu (and the treatments thereof ;) )
You know, it's like how you feel like sticking two fingers up at the fifteenth driver to splash you driving through the same damn puddle, but guess what, they didn't do it fifteen times! They just did it the once, the same as the other fourteen.

Secondly - This thread is just as bad! 'They' say this and 'They' do that! A lot of assumptions being made about these dreadful people who make assumptions about people.
If the worst you ever get called is a Bunny Hugger, I think maybe you'll live. I've been called worse, and am no doubt about to be again!

Thirdly -If there's one thing worse than a few independently snotty posters it's someone doing the whole board police thing. The OP admits she doesn't post often, but will make and exception to slap a few wrists! There, that will teach you all, now play quietly and nanny won't have to tell you again. :)

Fourthly - I'm sorry, some of the people 'trying to be funny' ARE being VERY funny, it's not their fault if other people are feeling sanctimonious and sniffy. Some of the comments on here make me HOWL with laughter. Who said 'it depends on your stocking rate' on that sock thread the other night? That was one of the funniest things, EVER.

Fifthly - One man's plain talking is another person's rudeness. Confuscious he say. People are different, it's only a blooming message board.

Sixthly - Live long and prosper. Happy Christmas. Worse things happen at sea. Etc.
 
The Rebel Reindeer said:
*Rebel Reindeer advance books some lions to toss the veggie, happy hacker to *

"and do I see the word cob :eek: in your name?"

*increases order for lions*
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PMSL!! :D

It does get a bit bitchy on here sometimes! I have often thought about posting for advice etc then decided against it in case I get lynched for some reason :( I was reading a post the other day which turned nasty, when I looked later on the next day it was still right up at the top and people were still all over it - I guess it's the rubbish weather leaving us all at a loose end lol
 
skewbald_again said:
Firstly: Everyone's different, when we hit bad moods, or get unreasonable, it's for different reasons, not the same, corporate one. I'm sure the bad weather is making a lot of people grumpy, money worries, colds, flu (and the treatments thereof ;) )
You know, it's like how you feel like sticking two fingers up at the fifteenth driver to splash you driving through the same damn puddle, but guess what, they didn't do it fifteen times! They just did it the once, the same as the other fourteen.

Secondly - This thread is just as bad! 'They' say this and 'They' do that! A lot of assumptions being made about these dreadful people who make assumptions about people.
If the worst you ever get called is a Bunny Hugger, I think maybe you'll live. I've been called worse, and am no doubt about to be again!

Thirdly -If there's one thing worse than a few independently snotty posters it's someone doing the whole board police thing. The OP admits she doesn't post often, but will make and exception to slap a few wrists! There, that will teach you all, now play quietly and nanny won't have to tell you again. :)

Fourthly - I'm sorry, some of the people 'trying to be funny' ARE being VERY funny, it's not their fault if other people are feeling sanctimonious and sniffy. Some of the comments on here make me HOWL with laughter. Who said 'it depends on your stocking rate' on that sock thread the other night? That was one of the funniest things, EVER.

Fifthly - One man's plain talking is another person's rudeness. Confuscious he say. People are different, it's only a blooming message board.

Sixthly - Live long and prosper. Happy Christmas. Worse things happen at sea. Etc.
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Agree with you to a point. BUT I wasn't intending to slap wrists/be police/tell people off (why the hell would I?) it was just my musings about how the forum seems more hostile than it used to be and that I think this is a shame.

I agree we should celebrate differences & enjoy a bit of humour, but not at the expense of others who (for whatever reason) then become upset & defensive.

There are MANY funny posters on her who do not resort to name calling or spite.

Rudeness is just that. No dressing it up. Perhaps I am soft but it isn't necessary.
 
I completely agree with you OP!
I'm scared to put anything on here that isn't ridiculously boring/sensible in the fear that I'll be banished into eternity. Cobs all the way :)
 
Jayde87 said:
I completely agree with you OP!
I'm scared to put anything on here that isn't ridiculously boring/sensible in the fear that I'll be banished into eternity. Cobs all the way :)
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Why? What do you think they can do to you? Honestly, it is just a board. They can't come and get you. Mostly :D
 
I have to admit, I have needed some advice on a few occasions now but been too scared to ask because som any people on here basically laugh if you ask a ''stupid question'', puts me straight off posting up!
 
skewbald_again said:
:D

No seriously though, I can understand people being cross, fed up, annoyed, etc, by people on a board, but not scared, surely?

Not on the Benylin tonight, honestly. Can Hall's Mentholyptus make you agressive mixed with PG Tips?
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Good grief that's a combination to watch out for!!!! :eek:
 
I'm kinda glad you posted this Arwen, I'd been thinking the same.
I haven't really used this forum for the last year or so, (looks like I've come back at the same time as you!) and have been quite shocked at the tone and sarcasm of some users nowadays.
I just feel sorry for some people who post something quite innocent, only to be shot down in flames, called trolls, mocked and generally made to feel stupid. When actually, they are probably just trying to make conversation and fit in.
Sure, have a laugh, make jokes etc, but not at other peoples expense. It's rude and cruel at times.
I wonder how many users would be quite so rude if not hidden behind a computer?
 
very bitchy this forum is...my friend who buys n sells a couple of horses has asked to be removed off here due to the nastiness of some of the people on here.
 
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