When’s the time ☹️ to put to sleep

[hannahob77]

Hi everyone
First post… my cob (now 23) who was my first horse was diagnosed with lower ringbone 6 years ago so I retired him and he was doing quite well as a field ornament. He went on loan for 2 years to a wonderful family as a companion to their ridden horse. He started having a series of abscesses and the vet they were using suggested he may have a benign tumour in his front hoof.. he hasn’t suffered with an abscess now for over a year. He came back to me a couple of months ago with the advice from the vet, that whilst he can still get up and down ok then to see how he goes. He hasn’t been able to trot for a long time and is incredibly stiff, he ambles around and wholeheartedly loves his food. I know I won’t make him go through winter because I can’t keep him out due to the conditions of the field and being stuck in a stable won’t benefit him at all, yesterday the farrier came and I could barely get him to lift his back feet… am I being cruel? I feel so incredibly quilty. I’m sorry this has probably been discussed 1000’s of times but it’s affecting me to the point of distraction.

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

Is he on bute? Either regularly or just before the farrier visits? If not, I would speak to the vet and get him some anti- inflammatory pain-relief for the rest of the summer. It can make a noticeable difference.

 

[SadKen]

He is your horse, and you know him best. I think we know when it is time and usually asking the question means that it is getting to the right time.

It’s hard to watch them struggle, and from my perspective it was only worth a struggle if things were going to improve. In your case, it sounds as though your beloved cob is reaching a point where he isn’t field sound and is therefore in pain, and necessary care from the farrier is a struggle for him. Due to his age it isn’t going to improve. His inability to trot is also a consideration because horses are prey animals and the ability to run from danger is a key part of quality of life for me. In my experience cobs don’t generally exhibit stress and internalise it rather than show it, but it doesn’t mean they don’t feel it. It is great that he can still get up and down and enjoys his food but the situation will deteriorate rather than improve, because time makes fools of us all.

It is also unwise to ignore the impact on your own mental health. I have been where you are with a younger horse and it does indeed occupy your thoughts. That can become a real problem; we tend to ignore our own health because we feel it’s our duty to bear it to keep our horse happy. At some point, you must think of yourself in this.

Taking all of this into account if I were you, I would be scheduling the appt soon, within a week or so, for both of your sakes. When I lost my mare, I had a celebration of her life whilst she was still here. I put all of her ribbons on and took pics, she ate what she wanted. It was a nice way to let her go before things became desperate. Her ending was peaceful, organised and calm. I was obviously distressed at the time but honestly I couldn’t have given her a better end if I had tried and I’m so glad I made the decision when I did.

Hugs to you as it’s very hard to say goodbye, but it’s the last best thing we can do. That’s not to say it’s your only choice or the right choice, because as above, you know your horse best. Just what I would do based on what you have said.

 

[TheMule]

How much bute is he on a day? I would chat to the vet about potentially increasing it, if that is an option for you financially

 

[Quigleyandme]

Most of us have faced into this dilemma and asked ourselves these same questions. Once the decision is made the vet or operative will ensure the end is calm, quiet, compassionate and dignified.

 

[ester]

I wouldn’t keep a horse that couldn’t trot comfortably.

 

[meleeka]

If it were mine I’d try bute if you haven’t already. It will make a huge difference. If that’s not possible, or it’s not working anymore. I think I’d start making plans to let him go. He’s not going to improve, only get worse.

 

[SEL]

It was ringbone that finally took my old boy last year. I think the hard ground from the drought didn't help in those final weeks but I knew winter wasn't an option so once I could see he was uncomfortable then it was a matter of when not if - and phoning the vets was horrendous because he looked amazing last summer and left an enormous hole.

He was on 2 x bute per day (large horse) going into last year and I increased that with the agreement of the vets over the summer. We had a number of family occasions which meant I delayed the inevitable and drugs kept him comfy. He was still rolling, sleeping etc thankfully and still managing to jump bits of electric fencing to get to the long grass, but every time I pulled back on the bute it was obvious he was sore.

We lost 3 last year in different situations and I have to say I found all 3 vets absolutely incredible and really supportive. Don't be afraid to talk it over with them - we discussed options on all 3 of the ones we lost and they had my back in every situation.

 

[Tiddlypom]

If he's so lame that he hasn't been able to trot for a long time and he also struggles to lift his hinds to be trimmed then he is suffering now.

Either control his pain levels asap with vet input, or pts as a matter of urgency.

Or else you will find him down in the field and he won't be able to get up, and he will have to be pts where he is. I have known that happen too often .

 

[Tronk]

As all above have said, when you’re starting to ask the question it is probably time. Being unable to trot and struggle with the farrier would be enough for me. It’s certainly not easy- but your vet will support you.

 

[Barton Bounty]

Better to make the heartbreaking decision before something happens. Its not easy but its the kindest and best last thing you can do for them. Bless, I really feel for you but when your at the end of your options sometimes it is the only thing.
No judgement from any of us on here, we have all been there

 

[FinnishLapphund]

I'm sorry, it's not always easy to make the decision when it's up to you to judge on their quality of life, when there's still things they clearly enjoy. On Friday it will be 2 weeks since I euthanised my cat Cilla because her breathing was getting worse due to Bronchitis, even though she was on medication for it.
But it still felt difficult to make the decision, there was still things she enjoyed doing. On Thursday she followed the sunlight as it moved through the cat enclosure, I also saw her trim her claws on a cat tree, and play with/rub herself against her catnip toy.

I ended up reminding myself that the option was to do it when there was still things she enjoyed doing, or risk waiting until she was too sick to enjoy anything anymore. It sounds like you're in a similar situation. You can do it now when he still enjoys his food, or you can wait, and risk that he won't even enjoy that anymore.

{{{{{Hugs}}}}}

 

[Highmileagecob]

Can he get down to sleep and roll, and get up comfortably? I have always said when my old boy starts to struggle to rise, then that is the game changer. As long as you are sure you are controlling his pain levels, then it really is a matter of borrowed time. Be kind to yourself. Caring for retired horses can be stressful.

 

[Carrottom]

Ii think it is much better for our animals to have a planned, dignified end to their lives rather than waiting until it is an emergency.

 

[Birker2020]

I held my friends horse for the vet a few weeks ago. It was my first time. It was incredibly quick, peaceful and dignified.

I do agree with the others to try your boy on bute first, if you wish to go down that route. You can keep costs down considerably by buying them on a prescription, I was paying £68 for 100 sachets using a prescription via the vet when the vet was charging me £115 for 100 without prescription.

Don't worry about effects of bute in your horse. They can be on bute long term without any side effects.

For me, I would call it a day in a retired horse if it is struggling to get up/down, not eating up or showing any interest in its surroundings, not holding its weight or is visibly lame and it's already on sufficient bute. This latter was the case with my last horse, I drew the line at 2 bute a day and this was in a big horse 700kg.

 

[cjwchez]

I had an old pony PTS recently. She wasn't putting weight on, was moving around a lot slower and wasn't as chirpy as she used to be.

I debated with myself for so long "what if i try this" "what if i do that" but then ultimately made the decision to have her PTS. On the day the vet was scheduled to come, I caught her in the field and it took us quite a while to walk over to the gate, she had her head down and was walking really slowly. She really looked like she was fed up. I knew then that I had made the right decision.

Afterwards, I then debated with myself "should I have done it sooner?"

It's one of the hardest decisions we have to make as horse owners. Its awful that they can't tell us when they're in pain or feel like they're struggling when they reach an old age. You will know in your heart when its time, even though its heartbreaking.

For me, the grieving process started as soon as I made the phone call to the vets to get her booked in, I was incredibly upset in the days leading up to it. So when the time does come, I hope you will be okay. Reach out if you struggle with it.

 

[eggs]

It is a really tough decision to make but I have found that the worst bit was making the call to the vets. In my mind, once I started to ask the question I felt that I already knew the answer and go by the adage 'better a week too soon than a day too late'.

Whatever you decide I am sure it will be with the best interests of your boy.

 

[IrishMilo]

I'm so sorry you're facing this horrible decision. For what it's worth if he were mine he would have been put to sleep a long time ago.

 

[Orangehorse]

Its a really difficult decision. I haven't really long retired my horse from being ridden, but he has lost a lot of weight recently and his coat is simply awful, despite being on linseed all winter and always being given high quality feed.

He looks reasonably happy, although starting to look tired as his breathing hasn't been good, but at the moment he probably prefers being alive although he is starting to get that "I'm very bored" look because he isn't going out anywhere. But he is on two different veterinary medicines and I wonder what would happen if I stopped giving them to him i.e. what is his real state of health and lameness not masked by the medication. I don't want him to end up with laminitis in November from cushings and having an emergency PTS.

 

[nagblagger]

I have 2 on my 'when is the right time' radar. A very elderly 30+ yr shitland who looks old and decrepit, but still is an opinionated independent little man, once that goes it will be time. (months not years).
The second is a 20ish small coloured cob who developed a wheeze in winter, recovered when hay stopped, but started to get wheezy again - this will be a harder one as he looks so well, but if it can't be controlled and he has a really bad day it will be done the same day.

it is a hard decision but we owe it to them to do whats best at the time, don't feel guilty if you feel 'relieved' when it is done, the daily assessing quality of life can be extremely stressful. As a lot of people say, a day too early is better than a day late.
Look after yourself as well.

 

[Jellymoon]

I think the time is now, and I’m so sorry for you, you are an amazing owner. If he can’t trot and can’t lift his legs for the farrier, then he is in discomfort. I know how hard it is, but the ones I have left too long are the ones I regret the most.
I think the fact that you have posted on here means you know yourself it’s time and you need some reassurance. Well, you have it from many of us, that’s for sure.

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Difficult one. Sadly we've all been there and it isn't easy watching them degenerate.

Right now you say he's having problems holding his feet up for the farrier........ OK, so can he lie down & get up comfortably? Does he struggle with this? Does he tend to NOT lie down and doze standing up, because he's uncomfortable getting down & getting up again?? Sorry to press questions at you; but when I started looking at my old boy and actually "seeing" what was happening with him, I made "the decision". He was struggling to get down on the ground to make himself comfortable - and that for me was the decider. A livery last summer watched hers literally fall asleep standing upright and then woke up just in time to stop themselves falling, for the simple reason that the horse was actually physically unable to get down & up again without pain - and for her that was when she made "the decision".

Only you can know when the right time is: it isn't easy just watching them and wondering how long the situation can go on. I feel for you in this situation as it is absolutely heartbreaking.

However I take the view that a week too early is better than a day too late..........

Now might be a good time to be deciding what method of PTS you will use, and thinking about the logistics of what you might need to put in place to effect a peaceful passing for him. No immediate rush perhaps, but I would still, gently, encourage you to think about "the day"; also to make sure you have some support for yourself at what is going to be a difficult & sad time.

So very sorry.

 

[hannahob77]

Thank you all for your replies, the vet came today and my old friend was pts, it was peaceful and although I’m hurting, I know he no longer is. Xx

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I'm sorry to see your news. Your horse was lucky to have such a responsible owner

 

[millikins]

Very sad, you gave him a good life and a peaceful end,

 

[Cortez]

You did the right thing.

 

[ycbm]

Thank you all for your replies, the vet came today and my old friend was pts, it was peaceful and although I’m hurting, I know he no longer is. Xx

Well done Hannah, it's so hard but that was the right decision. Be kind to yourself now.
.

 

[Snow Falcon]

Some kindness hurts. RIP old chap

 

[Above the snowline]

Allow yourself time to grieve and be proud that you are a true horse woman and your horse was so lucky to have you as his owner

 

[Connemara24]

You really do know when it's time, wrote the same post around Feb because I just didn't know what to do then a few weeks later somthing happend and I could just see it in his eyes it was time, so let him out on grass for the day as he was a lami so wasn't normally aloud nice grass! It is a horrible situation to be in I would see if you could get some bute and see if that makes a difference if not then I would call it a day. Is he on any anti inflammatory sulpuments like boswellia making give that a go? Good luck and you will make the right decision whatever it is.