When do I call it a day?

Have just been reading about your trials and tribulations - having once (a long time ago!) been sold a horse that was not what I needed and scared the pants off me, I understand how you feel. I don't know how tall/heavy you are but perhaps your daughter's Haflinger would be able to do some slow work with you if you feel happy with this pony. My New Forest pony is only 14.2 but probably carries 14st + with his saddle and is now 20 and I've had him for 15 years but the vet tells me his back is fine and he has no arthritis as yet, so I haven't damaged him by making him cart me around! Admittedly we don't hunt and there isn't anywhere much round us for a lot of cantering but he's fine on a normal hack for a couple of hours.

I was told that my first horse had had a few days of lameness by the person I bought her from but I eventually met the previous owner and I think the lameness was a bit more than a few odd days but I learnt from this experience to translate any problems as being worse than you are actually told they are, so it's always worth bearing that in mind.

I do hope you have found something - even if it is a pony at a riding school -which you can sit on for an hour or two of the best recreation in the world! There is always a lot of advice from everyone about which breed is best (I definitely love New Forests now!) but it's not so much what breed as the temperament of the individual and its past experiences.

Good luck!
 
Try not to become too disheartened. Owning horses is never straight forward. I've made my fair share of mistakes, through naivety, trusting people I shouldn’t have done, and just downright bad luck over the years. Try to put this horrible experience behind you, and the good will outweigh the bad!

Can I ask what dealer it is? Is it one that seems to have an impossibly large number of 'safe', 'bombproof', 'paragons of virtue' based in kent? I'm looking for a horse for my novice husband, and I keep coming across adverts for different horses that sound far too good to be true, and (after googling the phone numbers) I realise they all come from the same kent based dealer.
 
Can I ask what dealer it is? Is it one that seems to have an impossibly large number of 'safe', 'bombproof', 'paragons of virtue' based in kent? I'm looking for a horse for my novice husband, and I keep coming across adverts for different horses that sound far too good to be true, and (after googling the phone numbers) I realise they all come from the same kent based dealer.
I'd like to see a horse advertised by them which isn't labeled as such!! Beware! :rolleyes::rolleyes::eek:
 
Firstly I'm sorry for your illness. It must be hard and all this added problem won't have exactly helped you mentally or emotionally.

Secondly I'd suggest just trying to 'squash' him between the mounting block and the fence. My horse charges off as soon as I have my feet in the stirrups. I think what's compounded your fear of this new horse is that you fell off and got knocked unconscious. Whilst this might sound harsh (not meant to) this in reality wasn't the horses fault (girth loose) so you need to lead him up the the mounting block again (between fence and block) and get on. Have a helper with a lead rope through his bit rings either side. When you are on get them to lead you around for a while. Don't get disheartened with what's happened. You really need to give the horse and your nerves more time.

I wouldn't say you were over horsed I'd just say that you have had a couple of unfortunate incidents which have led you to fear the worse due to what's happened to you. But you have to separate your accident falling off due to you not doing the girth up tight enough from this horse who in my opinion has really done nothing wrong other than panic as he felt the saddle slip.

Do you have a small indoor menage/indoor lunge pen so that you can get someone to mount your horse in relative safety and see what happens if you are still really scared to get back on?
 
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What a nightmare. Was it the well documented Essex dealer who's been in the press lately?
A friend of mine a few years ago bought a mare from a samll 'natural-horsemanship' dealer and when we went to see her (liver chestnut mare),were told that she could be a bit ticklish with her back legs. My friend liked the horse and bought her, anyway, the back leg issue got worse and worse until she was bucking in the stable when you tried to put the saddle on. She had been vetted at purchase. Eventually the dealer took her back and gave my friend another horse which my friend assumed was a swap. This was a young coloured cob, totally green and an absolute pig, it dumped my friend on the road several times whilst hacking out with me and tried to double barrel me on the lunge when I was lunging it. The dealer then told my friend she owed a substantial amount of livery/vets fees etc for a) the first horse which was still at the dealers yard and b) the top up for the 2nd horse which of course was worth more. She refused to take the 2nd horse back and the first horse was put down, due to something wrong internally, it left my friend substantially out of pocket with a horse she couldn't ride and was terrified of. It was eventually sold privately for meat money. This dealer is still practising. We need to stick together on these forums and tell our stories to protect other innocent people (and I might add that my friend and I between us have about 70 years of horse experience so are not newcomers to the game.
 
Another update - after my accident I was not with it at all, and thats why I thought my saddle had slipped (thought there had to be a reason!). My friend who caught my horse after the accident and put him away told me today that my saddle hadn't moved at all. So I wonder why he did shoot off? The dealer has told me that I have now ruined him, by getting on from the ground and letting the saddle slip. Now I know this is not the case (and the fact that he has now done the same to my instrucotr), I am glad he is going back. I am out of pocket by about £600 for vetting and transport (I know thats my risk), but will giving up riding for now, so haven't only lost money, I've lost my hobby and my 40th birthday present - toys out of pram:) Oh well, I'll have to just play with my daughters Haflinger instead (shame I'm too big to ride him!)

I'm really sorry that you're giving up riding now, maybe that will change after you've had a break for a while.

Glad to hear that the horse is going back for a refund though. People make the mistake of trying too long sometimes with horses that have been mis-sold, and then it's too late to send them back. Hard though it is, you need to be safe. A horse that is being sold as very safe shouldn't panic even if the saddle slipped - which you have since realised it didn't.

I don't know why you're being advised on mounting strategies when you've already posted that you aren't keeping the horse.
 
Op don't give up I suggest you go to good local riding school and have some lessons on a good school horse.
Then look for something though word of mouth join your local riding club as social member go and watch their courses go to their social things have fun ask around and when the time is right.
Going back to your experience with the cob I am a experienced competitive rider and if a dealer told me that the horse was fidety to mount I would expect there to be a significant problem around mounting be aware of what people say when you are buying that was her get out cause if it went wrong.
Never mount a horse that you have been told is fidgety from the ground in fact we never mount any of our horses from the ground and many horses today will be unfamiliar with it. Our hunters are used to it but not the others.
But all this behind you go and ride at a school for a while and the right time will come to get a horse for you.
Good luck and let us know how you are getting on.
 
As soon as i started to read this thread, ( Ihave only seen this today) the alarm bells started ringing!!! I may well be wrong, and if I am I apologise, but was it a dealer in Kent? Who recommended a vet who was coming to vet something else? Like I say, I may well be wrong, and I do hope they havent striked again!
 
Yes, they did have a vet coming to vet something else, but they weren't in Kent, more East Sussex. Wish we could name and shame (but saying that, they did give a refund). They didn't actually mark the horse as sold on their website at all, which I thought was strange as others were updated. Maybe he had been sold and bought back before?
 
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