When do you call it a day??

I'm sorry to sound heartless but do you really need more evidence than what you already have that the quality of her life has been over for months now? It is time to let go and do the decent thing for her, hard as it is, I'm sorry.
 
Montysmum - your dedication is admirable - you've really gone the extra mile with this mare.

But no amount of x-rays are going to change the outcome. Time to let her go.

Hugs ((((( )))))
 
Montysmum, stop putting it off.

You already know, from the fact she is in pain and is now a shadow of her former self, that she is already leaving you.

I can hardly talk, when I recieved the blurb from the vet about surgery for Carrie, I wanted to throw myself to her feet and beg her to do anything to save my baby. But I'd already had a talk with my Mum about what I wanted done, and she stepped in to stop the vet and ask for her to be PTS.

I truely wanted to slap my mother, I really did, but deep down, whatever I felt, whatever the vet had just said about saving her, when I looked at Carrie I knew she was leaving me.

Vets will offer you every treatment under the sun, thats their job. It's your job to tell them enough is enough. And that you already know.

have you got a friend who can help you talk to the vet about it? I found it helped so much having someone that could objectively talk about it with me.

*big hugs*
 
big hugs to you at this time, sounds best to let your girlie run free.

At least it is something we can do for animals and that is the greatest thing. End their pain

Take care my lovely and be brave. I have lost 2 boys, the first one I waited too long and I vowed never again, so my last boy went looking amazing and that is my lasting memory of him.

xx
 
montysmum1 said:
I have posted previously about my mare, who was hit by a car last october, and has not come sound since, and I am unsure of how much longer to continue with things...

She had her lameness work up a few weeks ago, this showed lameness on all 4 legs now. Bilaterally behind from the pelvis injury, and bilaterally in front with suspected suspensory ligament desmitis which the vet thinks is due to her compensating for the hindlimb problems.

Unfortunately this work up made her significantly more lame, she was put on 4 danilon/day and she was still lame/uncomfortable, after 7days I had to reduce this to 2/day on the vet's advice as 4/day is such a high dose but she is obviously very uncomfortable, neither box rest nor quiet turnout seem to help.

She's going for a Bone Scan on Monday, and hopefully this will highlight something we can treat, but i am trying to be realistic as she cannot carry on as she is unless we find something we can fix or improve.

But how the hell do you decide when enough is enough?? She's my baby and i'm desperate not to lose her, but i don't want her to suffer either, and seeing her in pain is breaking me... What are your thoughts please??
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Broke my heart reading this. You poor thing. I too have a mare who I love to bits who will never come sound. 15 months ago she broke her shoulder and tore her bicceps brachii tendon so badly her shoulder will always be unstable. I thought I would have to have her PTS, but slowly over 6 months I managed to get her out in a small paddock (making it larger and larger each week). She had a set back when she was on 3 legs again and I am on tentre hooks that the day will come when the joint will collapse and I will have to let her go. But so far she is lucky. She has always had a very high pain threshold and I purposely keep her danilon/but free so that she is more careful with herself. I am 100% happy that she is very content and really enjoying life.

If I had to see her day in day out with pain in her eyes and not enjoying life then I would PTS but it would be the hardest decision I could ever make as she is the most special animal I have ever had the pleasure to know. Life will lose a great deal of it's joy the day she goes.

Without knowing or seeing your mare, it is hard to make a judgement in order to give my opinion on her quality of life. Only you can do that. If you think she still has quality of life. If there is still a spark in her eye, then I would say carry on. There are many people who live with pain but still enjoy their lives and would not like to die. But there are also people whose pain makes them so miserable that they really do want to die. You have to make that decision for her, thinking only of her and not of yourself. I do not envy you. I am sure you will know what is right for her.
 
Just read your post re the bone scan. I am so sorry. 6 months is really not that long to recover from such an accident. It was that long before my mare could even go out in a 1/4 acre paddock, but those hot spots sound very sinister. The only time I have seen a very severe hot spot on a scan, the mare concerned continued to get worse and was PTS. A post mortem (at which I was present to help the vet) showed the top of her femur was sliced through. The problem is with pelvic injuries, that xrays cannot penetrate deeply enough to show the damage. I am so sorry.
 
I know that this is most likely the end of the road. I have asked for the x-rays for my absolute peace of mind, and because following the bone-scan she can't go anywhere for 48hrs anyway due to being 'radioactive' so I can't have her PTS until Thursday anyway, i've gone a long way past worrying about the cost of it all. She's on Gastro-guard daily now to help her stomach because of the Danilon - yes I have actually taken out a loan to fund this and the scan :o but the car drivers insurance company are dragging their feet over payments and she couldn't wait for them.

Yes i suppose i am going a bit over board in not wanting to give up, but i am literally desperate not to lose her, but I appreciate that a severe hotspot on her spine is serious, nevermind the rest of the problems, and deteriorating lameness.

To be fair, my vet is being unbelievably supportive of my desire to be certain there is no alternative, but at the same time is also reminding me that Euthanasia is probably the best option - she's not pushing me to keep trying different things just because, and God knows I would jump at any chance offered. She's very sensible and all credit to her professional integrity for being so.

Thank you for all your kind words. I am still hoping for a miracle today, but am preparing for the alternative :( :( :(
 
Just wanted to send hugs. I can totally understand you wanting to be sure that there is no alternative, for your own peace of mind. It isn't long to wait and I hope so much that there is amazingly good news.
If there isn't then I hope you have the strength to let your girl go and know that you are doing right by her. There are always people on here to offer advice or just listen, don't feel alone in this.
Be strong and I wish you all the best xx
 
You know your horse...I recently lost my girl, who was my angel and baby, I know the pain you're going through. ONE thing I would like to ask you is if anyone else has checked out the hotspot, no disrespect to vets and physios but there are other back specialists out there that maybe able to help make her more comfortable and lower the danilon dose.....

Big hugs and thoughts
 
The hotspot has been x-rayed today and shows massive de-generation of the vertebrae, the vet thinks the impact caused a fracture and/or severe ligament tears and the inflammation has caused acute damage to the bone structure. This is why the lameness is getting worse, and the pain relief is having less and less effect. Both my vet and the orthopaedpic specialist vet agree that there is no treatment for this.

I am going to see her and arrange things for her tomorrow.

Thank you all again for your incredible patience with me and support. I am absolutely devestated, can't quite believe it, but am glad I have tried everything for her. Now all I can do is put a stop to her hurting :( :(
 
I am so so sorry you have had to come to this decision! I know how hard it is, I did it at the beginning of March :( It is a horrible day but you are doing the best thing you can for her now. All I can say is have some huge hugs and hope the day is peaceful for you!
PM me if you need a shoulder xx
 
I let her go today. So sad, but she's not in pain anymore.

I went to see her, and for the vet to show me the x-rays and scan pictures, and it was horrific to see the damage, and I can't really understand how she's managed to walk around until now.

It was awful to say goodbye to her, but I could see the pain in her eyes, and the vet said there was nothing else we could do. I took her out to graze in hand, and fed her lots of apples and carrots, and she went quietly.
 
Try to take comfort from knowing you did every last thing you could for her - including the hardest thing in the world for you. I hope you might be able to think about being as wonderful a mum to another as you were to her. I know how hard it is to lose a soulmate and how empty the days are without them.

Sleep well sweetheart x
 
This truely is a heatbreaking story. I am so saddened for you! It a very hard decision to let your loving companion go. I had to let go my mare last year but she was old & in massive pain & I couldn't bare it anymore plus the sparkle in her eyes had gone!:(

At the end of the day, only you can decide, the X-ray should give you your answer, if there is a glimmer of hope that she can have a happy painfree life, if surgeory can put her right then Fantastic. If not, then I think you will know in the very bottom of your heart that it will be time to set her free from pain & let her meet her maker over the rainbow bridge.

Be strong for her! Even if it is the toughest day of your life.
It is just a horrible, horrible, horrible thing to deal with.
Good Luck!
 
I hope this can be a crumb of comfort today, but I went to a talk at my Vets last month & the main talk was from a guy from one of the well known rescue charities. One of the things he talked about was when they make the pts decision &, based on the amount of Danilon she needs, they would have made the same decision. We all need reassurance that we are doing the right thing at a time like this. Look after yourself.
 
So sorry to hear there wasn't a happier outcome as you tried everything you could. I hope you do take some comfort from that although I know how hard it would have been to have to make the final decision for her after all you've been through.
 
Oh God, I am soooooooo sorry. You knew in your heart that it was the right thing, but that doesn't make it any easier to cope with. Not after all that the two of you had been through.

You did everything you possibly could, and you gave her a chance. I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you both.

HUGE ((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))
 
She was very lucky to have you and I am so, so sorry for your loss.

I know how raw your pain is and am truly thinking of you today.

Have comfort in that you did all you could for her.

Hugs xxx
 
No words to help heal your pain, but hope to you take comfort in this poem:

Rainbow Bridge - author unknown

All the horses who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The horses are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your horse, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
 
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