when is it the right time, will i know?

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smellsofhorse

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My old boy is on limited time, vet has said he is painful on all legs and eyes are pretty bad and deteriorating.
It's definately not fair to put him through next winter but obviously the decision may have to be made much sooner.

He on Bute twice a day, but that won't get rid of all of the pain and it will work less and less.

I won't let him suffer and will do what's best for him.

Will I know when the time is right?
I don't want to do it too soon, before he is ready.

He can't come into the stable for too long any more as it makes him stiff, he doesn't like staying out in bad weather and since last year the flys really annoy him, he has a fly rug but I don't think its fair to put a mask on him with his vision problems.

What I need is breezy days and not too hot or cold!

Yesterday I was at the yard at 5am, he was happy grazing with his mates, I gave him his breakfast and he went off to eat again.
9am I rode my other gelding, firstly he was grazing still, hour later riding past field old boy was stood by gate in his uncomfortable position, shifting his legs.
Another hour later on returning gelding to field old boy was still there.
I gave him a hug and it really worried me he was in pain, has he had enough of life?

Evening I went back to feed them, he was happily grazing, ate his feed, had a nice brush and returned to field.

Will I know when the time is right?
Is now the right time?
If he is uncomfortable for a short time per day then maybe not now, but if he is uncomfortable for more time than not now is.
I think I will check him a few more tines during the day and see how he is.
 
Kate, I am so sorry this will be difficult for you, but I would not keep your horse alive any longer if he was mine.
 
Aww poor boy and poor you!!

What a horrible situation, ive never been through it myself so i dont have any advice but i would think you will know when he has had enough.

Just enjoy him, go check on him more and then make the decision either way

*virtual hugs* for you
 
From what you have said it sounds like the time is right now. Better a day too soon that a week too late.

Its never an easy thing to do but you need to think of your horse and not your reason for keeping him going. Sorry.
 
cptrayes said:
Kate, I am so sorry this will be difficult for you, but I would not keep your horse alive any longer if he was mine.
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I absolutely agree with cptrayes.

He on Bute twice a day, but that won't get rid of all of the pain and it will work less and less.
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I didn't read much further than this I'm afraid. And I would be calling the vet/hunt today.

Hugs, hugs, hugs xx
 
Better a little early than a little late but I do understand how hard this must be for you.I know I would be thinking' Just one more day!' Book it when you have plenty of time.Arrange it the best way for you and your horse.Give him all of his favourite treats and some of your undevided attention and then let go.Try and enjoy your other horse.
 
If he is painful on all four legs and has deteriorating vision then that would be enough for me I'm afraid. It has to be quality over quantity every time and I find that if you are thinking about it it is generally is because it is time.
 
eahotson said:
Book it when you have plenty of time.Arrange it the best way for you and your horse.Give him all of his favourite treats and some of your undevided attention and then let go.Try and enjoy your other horse.
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And increase the bute until he's gone.
 
I would let him go..

I let my horse go last week.. I'll explain if need be.. He'd became poorly, vet said give him a chance as long as he wants to fight but he's in last chance saloon.. He'd never lost that fire in his eyes..

Last Tuesday morning he was sore but okay.. Up, bright, happy in himself although he was obviously sore.. At lunchtime I popped round to check on him.. He'd lay down for a rest but was gritting his teeth.. He still had the same old fire in his eyes but when I saw that look on his face for the first time ever, I picked up the phone and made the call without hesitation.. He was gone by teatime..

I'm all for giving them a chance, but a realistic chance.. And from the bottom of my heart, I believe if you can't control the pain, it leaves no options.. There aren't realistically any decisions to be made bar one, when..

I so sorry you are in this position and it's heartbreaking to have to make the call.. I wish you strength and peace of mind when you make up your mind xx
 
I think you are right, he seems ready now.
I was in tears with him yesterday, stood in the field hugging him.
But then seeing him happy grazing later, puts a small amount of doubt in my mind.

I don't want him to suffer, I have to make the decision for him, not myself.
 
I'm afraid I agree with the above. Having been in your position with my first horse things manage to sneak up on you when you're trying (as we all do) to keep them going pain free as long as possible. In my case it took a friend who hadn't seen my horse for a few weeks being shocked at how he'd deteriorated before I could make the choice.

In your position I'd make some time just for him and make the call. So sorry. Xxx
 
blucanoo1990 said:
I think you are right, he seems ready now.
I was in tears with him yesterday, stood in the field hugging him.
But then seeing him happy grazing later, puts a small amount of doubt in my mind.

I don't want him to suffer, I have to make the decision for him, not myself.
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That is the hardest thing, when doubt creeps in. But I think the fact that you were so upset yesterday, knowing the horse as you do - gives you your answer:(

Give your vet a ring love and have a chat with them. Tell them that you think it's time to put the horse down and see what they say. Also ask them about increasing the bute.
 
blucanoo,

I think that you already know the answer, don't you? It's horrible, and everyone feels for you, but the time to do it is whilst you have a choice, and before you have no choice, and from what you say, that time is now here. I'm sorry.

Alec.
 
I think by asking the question you know in your head that the right time is now but your heart is having trouble with it. Spend some lovely time hanging out with him, treating him and enjoying him. Take lots of pics to look at later on. Give yourself that time to say goodbye and then do the ultimate which you know is in his best interests. So so hard when your heart can't let go but you sound like a lovely responsible owner who will do the best for your boy. Hugs and courage sent to you xxxx
 
Alec Swan said:
blucanoo,

I think that you already know the answer, don't you? It's horrible, and everyone feels for you, but the time to do it is whilst you have a choice, and before you have no choice, and from what you say, that time is now here. I'm sorry.

Alec.
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This.

I think in your heart of hearts you know.

We were concerned that we would get the timing wrong with our old boy but when it came to it, we just knew.

Be strong xxxxx
 
blucanoo1990 said:
I think you are right, he seems ready now.
I was in tears with him yesterday, stood in the field hugging him.
But then seeing him happy grazing later, puts a small amount of doubt in my mind.

I don't want him to suffer, I have to make the decision for him, not myself.
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I can always remember standing with a horse with a fractured leg, he was busy munching away seemingly without a care in the world. When the vet arrived he said grazing was like an automatic survival instinct, a horse with quite severe injuries and pain will still graze.

I am sure that you know the right thing for him, sadly it is the hardest thing for us. Have you anyone there to support you at the moment? xx
 
Surreydeb said:
I think by asking the question you know in your head that the right time is now but your heart is having trouble with it. Spend some lovely time hanging out with him, treating him and enjoying him. Take lots of pics to look at later on. Give yourself that time to say goodbye and then do the ultimate which you know is in his best interests. So so hard when your heart can't let go but you sound like a lovely responsible owner who will do the best for your boy. Hugs and courage sent to you xxxx
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Cant say more than this, but my heart goes out to you ( hugs)
 
It is a difficult decision and unfortunately one only you can make. I always said with my old mare she will let me know whens she's had enough and she did. Her spark had gone and she just wasnt the same, so we made the call. I swear that when I said goodbye she knew and said goodbye as well. My mum said the same with her old horse you can just tell by the look in their eyes. Sending you lots of hugs as I know how hard it is, I think you have already made your mind up though. xxx
 
OP - that could have been me writing your post. I let my old boy go yesterday. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do even though I know it was the right thing and am at peace with my decision. My old boy was still grazing happily but couldn't stand still for long and was very sore after getting up from lying down (which he was doing less and less). A real telling point was that a young gelding that he was previously the boss of, had stopped respecting him and it was almost asthough the tables had turned. My boy had 3 or 4 days on 4 sachets of danilon a day (but even then his lameness was subtly noticeable) and we had a lovely morning with him and he looked great! My heart is broken but I know that I've done right by him.
 
Oh I feel for you, my eyes are filling up. When I let me pony go last month I was exactly the same as you. Crying my heart out everyday with her before I had made the call- as deep down I knew I was going to lose her. She gave me that 'look' and I arranged everything that day for the following day. I buted her up for the last few days, let her eat all that she could and stayed with her till the end. She is now on my dining table in a lovely casket of ashes. You know the answer that is why you are so sad :( i really send you big hugs, be strong xx
 
Yes, I think you will know. I had been considering it this time last year for my old girl but have always said that while the good days outweigh the bad days I'll keep going with her. Now I'm not certain that the good days are good enough so I have already spoken to the vet and am just letting her have a few more weeks, hopefully of nice but not too hot sunshine. It breaks my heart to see her getting so old but it will break my heart even more if she slips in next winters mud and can't get herself back up again. At the moment she is getting up ok but trips over her own shadow and is prone to falling down as a result. She is clearly losing her sight and hearing and is just a little old lady in her 90s now. She is still quite bright and cheerful but her body is just worn out and I can see behind the facade. She spends alot of time dozing so to sleep for ever won't be so very different. I haven't fixed a date yet, but it will be before 1st November and that is guaranteed.
 
I made this decision last year with our old mare - sent pictures and vids to dad of what she was like as she was technically his, explained what was going on (I think he spoke to the vet too) and even though the results from the 1st pergolide/presdat(sp.) test came in at perfect dosing the day before the deed, it still went ahead as I didn't want to see her go downhill even further (she went loopy on the meds - not in a joie de vivre way either). We wanted to remember her as she was, not as she would become.

Yes, I still have doubts. But I know I did the right thing, especially when I see at least 2 other horses on the yard that are clearly in pain, to the point non-horsey people have pointed it out and they are being kept going and I am then glad we put Rosie to sleep when we did.

As others have said, I think the time has come - the very fact you have asked it suggests you think it might be time.

Hugs to you though xx
 
blucanoo1990 said:
Thank you for all of your support.

I think I know the right time is now.
I'm going to increase his Bute and give him a lovely weekend.
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A little practical advice now for you.

Make sure you book whomever is going to put him to sleep for you in advance - don't leave it for the day you think it should be done.

Hugs to you, and try not to be too sad.
 
I had to make this decision last year. I know my boy had some discomfort but was managed on a a bute a day and he was comfy on that. I however didn't want to put him through winter to have him suffer more so i set it up to be done at end of summer. I uped his bute for last couple weeks and he was happy as Larry. I know i made the decision and prob to early.
I think you know its time. Increase his bute for next few days it won't harm him. Spoil him rotten but know you are making the hardest decision for u but kindest and most important for him. *Hugs*
 
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