when is it time to say goodbye.

[wistavon]

i find myself in that position i think we all hate to think about.
i have a 30 year old pony "robbie" i think when he was younger life was not good to him and he has had laminitis and now suffers with cushings. we have had him for 6 years and he has been well loved and cared for but time is catching up with him and the last week has not been easy for him. we have put him on 2 bute a day and that has helped him, tomorrow the vet is comming and i dread that he will say that enough is enough.is it unfair to try and get robbie to the summer and give him a few weeks of sun and then rethink the situation.he is eating well and drinking but is 2 bute aday too large a dose for a 12.2 pony.will robbie make it obvious when hes had enough i dont want him to suffer but i dont want to give up before he is ready.

 

[Stinkbomb]

With all my pets that i have had to have PTS, the look in their eye was enough for me to know.

I dont envy you, i have been through this twice in the last year. Its hard to explain when a pony has had enough but you know your pony better than anyone. I always wondered myself "how will i know when the time is right?" trust me in that you will know when enough is enough.

 

[brighteyes]

Our 27 year old is a bit ricketty atm. She has Cushing's and gets a bit of laminitis now and again. She's been on pergolide for a year and it improved her from a pretty deperate state in summer 06. She has had an excellent year and is doing her usual creaking gate impression as we head into winter.

It may well be that your pony is ready for going - has his appetite and spark disappeared or is he just a bit quieter than usual?

I'd say you'll know when he really can't be bothered any more and life no longer seems to have any appeal. Struggling to get up after lying down, difficulty eating and getting around, not bothering with his friends or acknowledging you are all good enough reasons to call it a day on his behalf. Pain can be managed but you can't force them to keep going.

I wish you courage and an understanding vet. I would even try putting him on pergolide - pm me for how to get it cheaply. I would argue for no tests, just the prescription if the vet seems to think it might work and buy him a few months.

 

[snurse]

I think you will know - maybe you do already. It's a horrible decision to make, but it's the last and best thing we do for our pets. It hurts us, but not them. Remember that a winter may be hard on him. I had my old mare PTS at the end of a long warm summer in the field. Honestly, she looked good - well-covered and glossy - but I knew she wouldn't get through winter without distress. Have courage, and remember to do whatever you do with love.

 

[susanjc]

to daisymay 66

What a lovely way to say it .............................

 

[buffy2]

Sadly i had to pts one of my old ponies 2 yrs ago now,found him on the floor and had trouble to get up and it was just the look in his eyes that said it all an hour and half later he was gone,poppy my oap at the moment is very well but time will tell if i will see her through another winter.
Hugs to you for tomorrow

 

[Persephone]

I feel that you have asked the question, therefore you know in your heart of hearts that it's coming, but when? 2 bute a day is a lot for a little pony like that, and, although he would tolerate it for a while, he has an awful lot going against him. In the end it is the most loving thing you can do for your pony. It's hard, it's devastating, but you will have let Robbie go at a point when you still have a choice. There is nothing more sad than a pony that has reached the bitter end. When my mare went down (she was 30), we had two choices. Get her up and not know when she was going to go down again. Or put her down there and then. I chose the latter. Now every day it rains my husband and I say to each other "Sandy would have hated today" I would not want to struggle to get an oldie through the winter for the sake of a few weeks in the summer. Best I think to give them a few nice days now if possible. I really feel for you.

Jo x

 

[Tia]

If he was a large horse I'd say let him continue along this route so long as he is eating, drinking and appears happy in himself.....however he isn't. He's a small pony and the amount of bute he is on is very high for his size.

I have been in the same situation as you and I chose the alternative to what I am about to say to you; mainly because our little 11.2hh 30 year old pony was our childrens pony. He was not well and our vet suggested putting him on bute for a few months. Well as happens with bute at this level on these oldies, it started to adversely affect his kidneys and once that happened, although the vet suggested some other medication for him, I chose to say goodbye to him.

The children were devastated but understood that it was the kindest thing we could do for him.

I always say look in their eyes and you will know when the time is right, but you see with our little guy he really wasn't ready to go at first, but in retrospect, we should have made the decision earlier.

 

[Box_Of_Frogs]

I always say to myself: if my horse could speak, what would he say? Would he say, mum, I've had enough...I'm tired and I hurt and I just want to go to sleep now and I'm too tired to wake up. There's your answer. If it is time, please stay with your old friend to the end so he knows his mum is there and everything is ok, however hard that may be. Don't make him go through it alone. Sending vibes. x

 

[Thistle]

I have a similar pony, in similar condition. He has just gone on th 2 bute a day, my vet has advised that he could take 4, in the short term, to buy some time if we needed.

I had decided on Fri that he would go today, however he has really perked up over the weekend and has gone back to being his normal annoying and cantakerous self, so not time to say goodbye yet!

I shall keep him on 2 bute for a week or so, then drop back to 1 and review the situation, I will know when it is his time, judging by the way he was kicking the door for breakfast, it is not today.

I shall take every day as it comes.

 

[kerilli]

i wouldn't try to keep him going through the winter in the hopes of him having a couple of nice weeks next summer... it's a long way off, and horses really don't see things the way we do.
if he greets you with a whinny, looks forward to his grub, wanders about happily, greets his mates, gets up easily (most important of all with oldies i think), and seems to be his usual self, then i'd let him have more time.
if not, then i think you have to be very brave and console yourself with the thought that you are doing absolutely the right thing. *hugs*

 

[Stoxx]

To be honest I think that by asking the question you already have your answer. You wouldn't consider it unless you thought it was the right thing to do.
I had to go and say goodbye to my friends old horse at the wknd, he is being pts on Thursday. It was heartbreaking as I've known him for years, but to put him through the winter would just be selfish.
What we have to remember is that when they go, they go, they don't know what we've done and they aren't in pain so therefore keeping them alive past their time is purely to put off our own sadness.

 

[wistavon]

thanks everyone , wanted to let you know vets been and she thinks he looks good for his age,bit of stiffness and possible touch of lami but not on his last legs infact he was a little sod for the vet didnt want to have his feet checked ,heart checked or a blood test if you dont mind !!!!!!!!! so that showed a bit of spark . would have been worried if he just stood and did nothing.will take him off bute and get the farrier back again and drop his feed down a bit maybe too much speedibeat (trying to keep weight on ) so will give more hi-fi. i still know hes gettting old and wont go on for ever but at least she felt that i wasnt pushing him on for mysake, he still wants to be around and thats great.

 

[brighteyes]

Sounds like you fell a bit better, too!

 

[pinkcatkin]

Gosh I just read all that and it brought a proper tear to my eye. Poor you, we all have to go through this don't we. Brings to mind my old Lab who is really on borrowed time and as long as he wags his tail I know everything is fine, the day it stops will be the day that I do my bit for him. My friend said "just make sure that every day is a golden day for him" and I really try and do that, even if its just a good old cuddle. Glad you are feeling better, hope things get better.

 

[Persephone]

That's fab! Sounds likehe has really rallied! Let's hope he keeps it up.

 

[Thistle]

try spillers hi fibre cubes

 

[henryhorn]

Sorry I didn't see your post until now, but don't worry, when the time comes you will not have any doubt, they let you know themselves.
We have many retired horses here and as they prepare to die they go much quieter, take themselves away from the others, and generally don't want to eat.
This doesn't happen overnight but it gives you enough time to step in and take the decision for them so they don't suffer.
Horses I've owned for years have communicated to me when they have had enough. That may sound stupid to some but they look me in the eye and there is a strong sense of help me please comes into your head.
You still feel uncertain about if it's the right thing once you book the vet, but the feelings are not as strong as the postive ones that now is the time.
I wouldn't worry about the bute, we had a riding school pony who lived on a high dose for years, he never showed any sign of pain or ulcers, what you need to remember is that old people now take massive amounts of tablets, my own MIL is on 15 a day! (she's 85...)
Don't worry, you'll know when the time is right.

 

[caths]

Have a look at this site http://www.veteran-horse-society.co.uk/
click on the 'about us' page and look at the contact details for Julianne Aston. She deals with olderhorses on a daily basis and will I am sure be able to give you good advice. Her e mail address may be best as she is bound to be busy during the day. I had cause to contact her recently and she was fabulous.
Hope this helps