Why are horsey people such mugs?

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erg4862

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Hi, this is my first post but have been reading the forum for a few weeks now. The biggest thing that has struck is is how much horsey people let others take advantage of them! I started riding a horse for a woman early last year, idea was to bring her on and compete in county level and higher showing. This woman has a yard with about 10 of her own horses including stallions, foals and mares in foal. It has now got to the stage where I am basically looking after all her horses as well as working full time and therefore have no time to ride my horse - which she moans about as she wants me to start competing her. Feel bad if I moan but I know half the time she isn't working that hard and probably off visiting people while I end up slogging. Why do we let people get away with it?

The erg
 
Quite possibly becauase sometimes we get to ride some exceptional animals, learn some amazing things, and be more involved than would preveiously have been???
 
Nope not paid anything. Wouldn't mind but I don't even get any thanks as it's just expected now. Thing is I'm more than happy to help out when someone has a problem or just needs a hand, just fed up of having the mick taken - get to the yard about 6 every night of the week and rarely leave before 9, often having to muck out 6 or seven stables, do hay and feed and then spend all day sat and sun doing the same as well as helping liveries with their horses and helping to break youngsters.
 
Gosh, time for a little chat then.

Quite simply tell her that unfortunately you won't be able to continue as you've been doing.

Is your horse at that yard as well??
 
if ur not getting paid well then ur a mug!!sorry dont mean to sound harsh im a mug aswell exact same thing happened to me my YO completely took the mickey she was being paid schooling and competition livery for horses yet i was schooling them with not a word of thanks for it and competing them paying entry fees out of my own pocket she kept saying she would repay me but it never happened. Then she suddenly realised that her son is the greatest rider since the whitakers (he is far from it) and decided that he could do a much better job of it than me she didint even tell me he was taken over but i copped on when id rush home to ride and they would already have been ridden!!anyway im still "allowed" to school the ponies because her son is too good for ponies now still dont get any thanks for it but if i dont ride them they dont get ridden i really should stand up to her and ask for payment considering she is raking it in for work shes not even doing but im a chicken!!
 
Will have to do something, it's her horse I'm riding as at the moment there is no way I could afford to but something as good. She keeps taking on ponies for breaking but they are far too small for her to ride so it's me and a friend who keeps her horse there that are breaking them but not getting paid anything for it and I know she is getting paid a LOT of money. Thing is I feel bad for her as she has gone through a hard time recently, is trying to set up another business and is struggling with cash but as much as I care about her and love the nags I don't think it's fair to carry on.
 
I agree with amymay!

Also you'll be surprised how many people with nice horses, want help with riding!! especially from someone caring like you.

Maybe advertise yourself first and see what your options are?

This horse maybe lovely, but you're hardly getting chance to do you both justice as it is are you?
 
It's getting to that stage. However I love all the horses and mine is good enough quality for HOYs which is what we are aiming for and there aren't many of those around needing riders.
 
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It's getting to that stage. However I love all the horses and mine is good enough quality for HOYs which is what we are aiming for and there aren't many of those around needing riders.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, you've got to lay it on the line. You are happy to do the riding of this horse, and care - but that's it.
 
think there are two types of people- people willing to be mugs and people only too happy to take advantage of the mugs!!but its not just horsey people its the way of the world im afraid!!the worst thing is that this woman has a hold over you ie you have the opportunity to ride a fabulous horse, and saying something to her might be cutting your nose off to spite your face. the best thing to do is to continue lending a hand but make it clear that your not willing to do as much as she expects of you. If i were you i would make riding the horse your supposed to be riding your priority and if you have time to help out afterwards then do it graciously. But leave the yard at whatever time you want make up an excuse if you have to but if you dont want to be stuck there until 9 at night then leave!!i was in a similar situation although i do keep my horses with YO so i was paying her livery for jobs i ended up doing myself i didnt say anything to her like i said im a wuss i just started to suit myself abit more. As long as you let her take advantage of you she will continue to do that its human nature!
 
I was just having the converstation with Rachel (Rachel_skeff) before and we were agreeing that some horse owners take the biscuit when they expect free grooming or horse care in return for nothing. I would never ask someone to groom for free without offering something in return. Rachel rides Louis for me sometimes and comes to comps with me and while she never asks for money (as she's a friend) I feel it's only fair to give her something in return. I take her out to competitions for free in my trailer and let her do some classes with Louis and act as groom for her.

I agree though with what's said above you are being walked all over and I would walk away.
 
You know there are loads of people out there who would love a good experienced rider to help with their horse. I am no rider, I just past stage 3 many moons ago, but they were good schooled horses, no awards for bravery here!!! Have a very green horse who untill I got him had only ever seen the hunting field in Ireland. I would love someone who was that little bit braver and talented to help me sort his quirks. If I could find someone like that the last thing I would do is treat them like a slave. Move on, if you realy are good you will find a better deal.
 
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