Why are people so flipping rude?

[Cowpony]

Sorry, rant alert here! I've been stewarding at shows a lot this year as the pony is injured so I can't compete. Today I was on the arena party all day - started at 9am and finished at 4pm, no break, just ate lunch on the hoof so to speak. I helped put the jumps up when they were knocked over and between rounds and classes. I answered questions about where to put numbers down, rules of the class, what order the competitors were going in, what the jump-off course was. I picked up rosettes which flew off on the victory lap and caught loose ponies when their riders came off. I opened the gate for every single competitor as they went in, as they went out, as they went in for the jump-off, as they came out, as they went in to collect their rosettes and as they came out. I wished them good luck as they went in and either congratulated or comiserated as they came out. And only TWO of them actually said thank you all day!

I do it because I enjoy it and to give something back for all the times I have competed and others have volunteered to provide me with a fun day. So I don't do it for effusive thanks, and I do get a present from the organisers. But since when was it acceptable to ignore somebody when they say "Well done" or when they hold the gate open for you?

Aaaaaannnnddd breathe......thank you for letting me vent.

 

[AmieeT]

My pet hate that! Well done you for doing it all. Some people just have no manners!

Ax

 

[twiggy2]

well I have not competed or attended an event for a few years, but I shall say thanks without people like you thins sort of event would not run

 

[Cowpony]

Thank you AmieeT. Can you please come to one of our competitions next time, you sound a lovely competitor?

 

[numptynoelle]

Sorry you're so upset OP, that was a good deed you did today. I wish you had more people thanking you for your services, but also bear in mind they may have been sick with nerves or concentrating too much to notice anyone else! I know sometimes my fear/nerves can translate as extreme rudeness, when really the opposite is the case :redface3:!

Hope today hasn't spoilt your enjoyment of volunteering :smile3:

 

[wills_91]

I would be mad at that to, infact I would have probably started adding a sarcastic "your welcome" after opening the gate!

 

[Cowpony]

Thanks Twiggy2. Lovely replies and my blood pressure is slowly returning to normal!

 

[Cowpony]

Sorry you're so upset OP, that was a good deed you did today. I wish you had more people thanking you for your services, but also bear in mind they may have been sick with nerves or concentrating too much to notice anyone else! I know sometimes my fear/nerves can translate as extreme rudeness, when really the opposite is the case :redface3:!

Hope today hasn't spoilt your enjoyment of volunteering :smile3:

Yes, I did give them the benefit of the doubt on the way in, but not so much on the way out . I'll definitely carry on volunteering regardless - there's nothing better on a sunny day. Apart from being on a horse myself of course!

 

[case895]

Fence judging for BE once I had a massive row with 1 rider and tried to get the TA to eject her. Two weeks later I saw her again - she was an examiner at my Stage I exam...

 

[SadKen]

I'll say thank you OP. it's people like you that make amateur competing possible. So here's a big thanks and hearty pat on the back from me!

 

[windand rain]

I will also say a huge thank you OP for your time and cheery presence I used to run shows and struggled to get any help at all so from all us Native Pony enthusiasts who's shows would never run without the volunteers a huge thank you

 

[Jnhuk]

I tend to find the folks that do say thank you are those who have helped at events so know what it is like....

I always make a point of thanking folks who help and try to be cheery (even when things go no to plan) and have a chat with them if I can as helps to break up their long day.

 

[Cowpony]

Thank you, you all sound lovely competitors!

One positive part of the day was when a child turned his pony too tight to a fence, the pony had no option but to stop and the child gave it a smack. I said fairly loudly that it wasn't the pony`s fault. When the child came out in tears, complaining that the pony had stopped, his mother insisted that he patted the pony and she then gave him a good talking to! Bearing in mind the BM thread, it was a really good lesson in when it is right to give a horse a reminder and when not, and about sportsmanship. The child went on to take a much better line in the next class and went clear as a result.
A lesson well learned I think.

 

[Burmilla]

Please accept my heartfelt thanks, not only for your dedication at the last show, but to you and all other stewards, fence judges, organisers and the sweepers-up, plus judges, show secretaries, sponsors and people ensuring order in lorry and car parks! We wouldn't get so many opportunities to have fun, thrills and spills without you!

 

[Cowpony]

Thanks Burmilla. It's good to know we are appreciated.

 

[Spilletta]

I would like to say a big thank you Cowpony! Not that I often compete, and wasn't at your event, but when I do I'm always grateful to the helpers and always say thank you.

I think some people have no idea of the time and effort that goes into these things and take it for granted. I bet it wouldn't occur to some people to ever offer help with anything. It's usually the same old faces doing the work with the loudest moaners being the ones that never help!

 

[smellsofhorse]

I always say thank you.
But can understand people that don't.
They just don't think about how long you have been stood there.
They are in their own little worlds. Often feeling nervous and sick, or happy about their round or upset.

Don't take it personally!

Well don't for helping out!

 

[Cowpony]

That's for sure! There are a lot of people who compete but never help out. And that's fine, they may volunteer in other spheres....but many don't.

 

[maggiestar]

Fence judging for BE once I had a massive row with 1 rider and tried to get the TA to eject her. Two weeks later I saw her again - she was an examiner at my Stage I exam...

Yikes! Dare I ask what happened?

 

[Clannad48]

Yikes! Dare I ask what happened?

Me too - how did you get on

 

[Kikke]

How easy is it (or should be) to say "thank you"
Not enough people know how to and expect thing for nothing!
you needed a rand and can't blame you at all!

 

[Clannad48]

I brought my daughter up to always say please and thank you to all stewards, helpers etc at shows, I am also the type of mother who did not allow her to take any mistakes out on the pony. However, there were occasions when she was ignored, been rude to and generally treated badly by adults who should have known better. Now she is older (22) she volunteers at shows and gets very exasperated if someone is rude to her.
Good manners cost nothing.

 

[YorksG]

Sis and I have stewarded and judged for years, the children are often quite good at please and thank you, especially those wearing pony club ties Some of the adult competitors and some of the parents are another matter!

 

[SO1]

I always say thank you to stewards and the judge too, I am always amazed in the line up when people don't even say thank you to the judge when they get given their rosette.

I would expect people to thank you for open and closing the gate for them if they are near enough to you for you to hear and if they are in control of their horse. I did a bit of stewarding to help out when my pony was unwell and I can see often at local shows some people look very nervous/worried and I can see why they may forget to thank people in the spirit of the moment.

 

[sasquatch]

I try my best with my pleases and thank yous, however sometimes leaving the ring/entering between jumping rounds can be a matter of get in or out as fast as you can and my thoughts are more on getting into the ring without any issues and getting out again before next competitor! If my name is called as gate is being opened, and I have time to thank I will - although sometimes I smile and nod my head, in the hope people realise I've heard them, yet I've not got time to give a proper thank you as I'm moving around and I find it quite rude to yell a thank you at people whilst cantering past or walking away from them to get into the ring/practice ring/moving out of the way
If a smile is something someone would find annoying, then I'd love to know what alternatives there are. I would thank those on the gates as I leave, however sometimes leaving and avoiding other horses waiting around can be chaotic and there isn't time, especially if one pony is misbehaving and setting others off etc.

I value everything stewards, helpers and those who organise and run shows do, and hope they all are aware of how thankful most people are. They're too easily taken for granted and I do try my best to show how thankful I am, for everything they do

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

95% of the time I say thank you to both judge and steward upon rosette presentation and when leaving the ring. The other 5% of the time they usually get a nod and brief smile/grim look of death as my horse is being a total you know what and I am concentrating more on staying on and not crashing into anyone lol! I also say well done to those above me in the line up and those below when I win.

Manners cost nothing.

A show I did a month or so ago there was another woman in the ring who I used to work with and she hates me, she tried to kill me a few times at work (not actually exaggerating there! Nasty piece of work that she is!) Gray as pr was looking superb and was turned out correctly for showing, another horse in the ring left due to bad behaviour and her horse didn't look great or behave very well so needless we won, she came 2nd. She was not happy, she snatched her rosette off of the judge and huffed and puffed with a face like thunder. Never said a word to judge nor steward. She was beaten fair and square but alas it was me that beat her so all was wrong with the world!

 

[gmw]

Always say thank you. Have taught children and grandchildren to do same. Whether it is at a show, shop or any service provided. It's only common courtesy.

 

[ebonyallen]

As you say How Rude, why do people have to be like this, I really have not a clue, they do not have any manners. I always will exchange a word and a smile and thank you, it takes seconds and costs nothing Well done for a.ll your hard work

 

[Fjord]

I've been lucky enough to steward at Burghley a few times now, the majority of people are very polite. Kai Ruder was so friendly and smiley when I opened the gate for him, he's a bit of a favourite now.

 

[kez81]

At shows I will always give a nod on entering and say thanks if I can get my nerves together! I always says thanks on exiting as by then I am a bit more together. My kids always have lovely manners at shows as I am a stickler for them anyway and wouldn't let them go again if they couldn't be polite and good sports. Its adults I often find are the rudest. The gates on moors around us are all big heavy self closing gates and I will often hold it open for other riders. Kids always say a cheery thanks as they trot past, adults not so much!