Why do people think no one can look after their horse like they

Hummmm, interesting question.

As others have said, you can vet the home you sell to but what if they then sell on? I have five now, which is a total pain, but couldn't imagine selling, especially as three have been rescued and I know what horrors they have previously injured. I feel they have been through enough in their lives and deserve a caring home for life.

It's not that I think no one else can care for them, and mine are not quirky, are very well behaved and have manners so can't imagine they would struggle to find good homes but it's the bond and love one feels that makes one irrationally believe no one else can care for their horse as well as themselves.
 
I may have a slight case of this, really would like to sell one of my boys but he's no walk in the park and I just worry what might happen to him so I just plod on wishing I could just magic a nice new home for him
 
ajn1610 said:
I have one who is an absolute millstone round my neck and I've made the conscious decision not to sell and will eventually probably have to have destroyed.
She is beyond quirky, we call her the bipolar pony and my Stressage trainer has described her as untrainable. She can work beautifully, she can jump like a stag, but she does nothing consistently ever. She has a terrible competition record because she throws her teddies out under any kind of pressure.
Her tantrum tricks include vertical rears without warning, spinning, napping, planting, reversing and lying down. The only thing she doesn't do is buck or bolt. She will turn for no reason kick off for 40 minutes and then continue as if nothing has happened, you can't ride her through it you just have to sit and wait her out and hope she doesn't put you both in danger.
She's difficult on the ground, she's difficult to load, she has sweet itch, sarcoids and RAO because of her conditions and she's not relaxed she couldn't just be a field companion.
I have spent 8 years and tens of thousands of pounds pursing every possible physical, training and alternative avenue to try and resolve her issues. She is not really any better when ridden by my trainers.
She's never been badly treated I bought as a newly backed 5 year old from a friend, I'm reasonably experienced and have produced 4 other youngsters who are all respectable citizens. She is lovely to look at, well bred, scopey, talented, completely disinterested, uncooperative and border line insane. If I tried to move her on I wouldn't lie so who would come to see her? Who would take her even if she was free?
I don't keep her because I think no one else can manage her. I've kept her because she's my responsibility she doesn't stand a good chance of finding a reasonable home. At the moment she is turned away, I have been doing some ground work and light ridden work but she is only 13 and I can't justify the potential expense of keeping her for another decade plus as a field ornament. I know we've reached the end of the road but I'm not quite ready to make the call yet.
I should have got rid of her in the first year but IMO there's no such thing as a forever home, she's such a pain she'd end up being moved on and the risk of ending up god knows where is too great for her. Plus I love her so what can you do :)
Click to expand...

I have a pretty similar horse. We bought her as a 3yo ex racer and we shouldn't have because we didn't have enough experience. She may have been amazing in the right hands, we tried loaning her out but she always came back, tried offering her to more experienced homes but they weren't interested and even when we paid experienced trainers etc to work with her/my daughter they all came to the conclusion that she wasn't trainable.

I remember when we hadn't had her very long our equine dentist offered to buy her for meat money but I had just paid a lot more than that and we hadn't yet had any troubles with her, oh if I had it to do again I would have given her to him. I thought that I kept her out of guilt and obligation but recently she had colic (turned out to be mild gas colic) and I was devastated to think she might die. Luckily she lives with my friend's horse as a companion, and my friend cares for her, but the day that I can no longer keep her I think she will have to be pts.
 
It's not so much a case of not being able to look after him like I do... It's that no one would want him. No one in their right mind would want to take him on, he just isn't worth it.
 
Why? Because some of us have horses with multiple health issues and we simply wouldn't want to pass them on in case someone else didn't respect those issues. Also, some of us own horses you have to be reasonably talented and brave to ride, who have issues which limit their (the horse's) scope . . . I've got one of those. He "can" jump a 1.30M in the school . . . he'd pop round a course of fences 1M no problem . . . but he shouldn't . . . certainly not now and probably not ever. It would be too easy for someone to see what he "can" do and forget what he "should" do. So I won't ever pass him on. I know that while he's with me he will be managed within his capabilities. He isn't a happy hacker. He isn't easy peasy to ride in the school. He shouldn't ever hunt or event again. But thing is, with a brave rider he could. But he shouldn't. And I can't downgrade him to happy hacker status because he's a nappy, spinny, rear-y sod when he's not completely happy.

So he's with me to the end of his days. Not because I can't pass him on, but because I won't. Mostly because I love the bones of him . . . but partly because I really can't trust someone not to go "oh, but he's so much fun to jump and he can jump BIG." Call me controlling, but I owe it to him to look after him.

P
 
I don't think people can look after my horse the way I do, simply because I have my own relationship with my horse, which I have built up over 5 years. That is not saying that other people can't provide the same standard of care as me..just that I like to treat my mare the way I want to be with her, ie interacting in the way I want to, and that is unique to me and my horse.

I also know first hand the horrors that are out there when it comes to neglect etc, and I am not willing to take that chance with my horse, so she would never be sold or put out on loan.
 
PolarSkye said:
Why? Because some of us have horses with multiple health issues and we simply wouldn't want to pass them on in case someone else didn't respect those issues. Also, some of us own horses you have to be reasonably talented and brave to ride, who have issues which limit their (the horse's) scope . . . I've got one of those. He "can" jump a 1.30M in the school . . . he'd pop round a course of fences 1M no problem . . . but he shouldn't . . . certainly not now and probably not ever. It would be too easy for someone to see what he "can" do and forget what he "should" do. So I won't ever pass him on. I know that while he's with me he will be managed within his capabilities. He isn't a happy hacker. He isn't easy peasy to ride in the school. He shouldn't ever hunt or event again. But thing is, with a brave rider he could. But he shouldn't. And I can't downgrade him to happy hacker status because he's a nappy, spinny, rear-y sod when he's not completely happy.

So he's with me to the end of his days. Not because I can't pass him on, but because I won't. Mostly because I love the bones of him . . . but partly because I really can't trust someone not to go "oh, but he's so much fun to jump and he can jump BIG." Call me controlling, but I owe it to him to look after him.

P
Click to expand...

I just read your post PS after I posted mine above, and you have said exactly what I feel..
 
Plenty of people could look after my boy better than me in the sense that they are more knowledgable, have better facilities and could probably deal with his (pretty mild) quirks better than me, and maybe even put a stop to them. Having said that, he's happy as Larry with his life and it wouldn't be better with anyone else as he's doing as much as he can physically do and he's treated like a king. He's never leaving me as he has health issues and I wouldn't expect anyone else to have to deal with them, it's not that I don't think they can, but he's my responsibility and I can't give up on him because he's not well. One thing NOBODY could do better than me though is love him, even though the old git doesn't deserve it sometimes.
 
We have kept all our animals to the end of their lives. For the horses, all mares for thirty years, this has meant that they have lived as a relatively stable herd, with pair bonds and older wiser heads in charge. If we were to sell on, not only would they lose their bonds with us, probably more importantly they would lose their herd as well.
 
Hmmm, I have sold 3 horses successfully, but taken a long time, and lost money to get the "right" home.

The first I was offered £18,000, but the home was not quite right so I sold for £5,000 to the perfect home. I only paid £5,250, so it was not so much a "loss", but when all was said and done the horse was "worth" well over £12,000 as several people would have bought him at that price.

The £5,000 home was indeed perfect, we kept in touch until he was eventually PTS after many years, having made the lady's dreams come true. We are still friends now, despite being hundreds of miles apart. The horse had a wonderful home.

The second I sold for only £8,000 despite the mare being "worth" more as she had behavioural issues still,that I just could not seem to get to the bottom of. They also did their utmost for her, and had almost 2 years where their dreams were coming true, only to find the behavioural issues were in fact due to an ovary issue. They tried an op, but sadly the mare died. The owners did a FAB job, and she had a wonderful time, as far as she could.

My last horse was actually sold for £1, he was not as sound as I would have liked for BE, he is now having a wonderful time, fulfilling someone's dreams and doing BD with aplomb! In fact he was a generous gift from my trainer, so I guess I "lost" nothing selling for £1!

BUT - Charlie horse was for sale. He did not enjoy BE at Novice level (although he usually won a numnah at BE100), and we advertised him. No suitable purchaser came forward, although we were certainly offered the money. We kept him and my husband learned to ride on him. He stayed with us until he needed PTS after a long and happy life. Never a day lame until it was all over. We could not have sold him as he was just SO willing a lot of people could see what he could do for them, but maybe were not so hot at seeing what they could do for him. TBH I *could* have found him the right home, if I had halved his price, but he was just so easy he always had a job, either with my husband or friends. In his case I was not prepared to drop the price.

That brings me to Jay. He has had top riders, but for some unknown reason preferred me. I am not saying I would never sell him, but he would have to agree with my choice of home. I doubt I will be selling him.

What am I trying to say? Well I think it is hard to re-home a horse. When I sell it is more like an adoption, it is important that both parties are suited, and I must be convinced that it is right. I even do a home visit. Even after the vetting I will generally deliver, and if I get a bad feeling then I would just reimburse the vets fee and take my horse home. As you can see I have "lost" money, but when I sell it is about doing the best for my horse. Yes, another home could be "better" but that "better" home may not offer a "better" price.
 
Last edited:
There are definitely people out there that would but I worry

1) that I'd miss them too much It's difficult to sell you children
2) what if my judgement is off that day and they are one of the many horse idiots I've met???
 
I know my stable management isn't the best, our hacking is all on the road and our fields get awful. I'm also not the best rider/driver/behaviourist. As such have sold and loaned both easy horses I've had for 7/8 years and ones I can't cope with :)
 
I think if you've had a horse and loved it then you don't want to admit defeat with it. It took me a year to finally get on and sell my tb cause no one would ever match up. I eventually sold him for pittance to someone who I knew would look after him because I knew the kind of owner she was rather than what I was asking for him to the total divs who were interested.
 
I totally agree with you.
Yes things can go wrong and horses can end up in the wrong home.
But, they are not all like that.
In a way it can be selfish to not find a horse and other home, some people keep them saying no one can look after them like I can but.
But they can!!!!!
They couple well be the perfect person our there.
Just look properly and be patient.
 
Because they can't! My boys live in absolute luxury and want for nothing - as far as I'm concerned nobody else could look after them quite like I do! And one of them is very quirky and can be hard work - e.g he is a right fidget, has a very big personality and you have to go about a lot of things in a certain way with him!)
 
In my case I don't think I know better but like others they have their quirks and reasons for staying with me as long as I can afford them TH young highland could go to a new home tomorrow and be loved and cared for better than me because she would be doing her job a job she loves and one which we find hard to fulfil, her issue is she can only live where there is either a very thick hedge or post and rails as she is not very good with strands of fencing she just climbs through I love her to bits but know she could do better. So yes she would be first choice to go if I could no longer afford horses and she would go to a new home. The other two would be PTS not because there is no one capable of looking after them but the old girl has been with me for nearly 19 years ir would be unfair to pass her to someone who may well physically care for her but may well stress her by stabling her when she really doesn't like it for long an hour in is enough and she jumps out Yes she could learn even at ehr age but why should she. She is loved by everyone as she is the perfect well almost perfect pony safe for a baby to ride but ups her game to jumping a meter and doing Novice dressage gallops like the wind and can give a very exciting ride. I could have sold her for 26,000 as a young horse now everyone who meets and rides her want to take her home
The boy is dangerous to small people and although he is only 9 I could never let him go as he is a perfect candidate for abuse. He is not a flight animal he is a fight animal he is loving and gentle on his terms but challenge him and you lose you head. The fact that he is child pony size would mean that someone may think he is suitable for a child, His actions have proved otherwise. he is entirely unpredictable with a child being perfect for 10 minutes then putting rodeo horses to shame to evict them and on the ground thinks nothing of using his teeth to pick them up and physically throw them out of his field. He is here to stay he is perfect for the job I want as he is a ride and drive pony and doesn't worry about being left behind so makes a perfect companion for anything even if we want to remove all but him from the field. Oddly I love the bones of him he has injured me and put me in hospital but I have had him since he was 4 months old and know every little movement he makes and what makes him kick off. He has had the life of riley handled in a firm but fair way fed had attended to like a horse all his life so He is an example of nature being his behaviour rather than nurture stopping his quirks. No one has every hurt him he has been like it all his life he was gelded by the equine hospital as a yearling and has lived with me since he was weaned although I owned him on his mum for a couple of months prior to that
So could someone look after them better than me well yes but should I let someone probably no as once they have left me I have no control over wha t happens in the future Like I say the young highland I would happily let go to a working home because that is what she loves doing and I don't ride anymore
 
Interestingly a number of people have commented on this post that no one else would want their horse. And a number are for similar reasons. So that alone shows that there are people who like the'quirky' type. I'm not saying I totally disagree but what if something happened to you if you could no longer keep said horse? Would all these quirky horses be destroyed?
My horse does have a home with me for life. Not because no one else could handle her/ look after her better than me, but because I love her. But God forbid catastrophe struck and I had no choice but to part with her, no way would she see a bullet because of my own stubbornness. And yes, she has her 'quirks' but what horse doesn't (some might call it character).
I fully appreciate there are those who truly need experience, or injury would prevent a horse being passed on but I don't think these are what the op was referring to
 
PStarfish said:
Interestingly a number of people have commented on this post that no one else would want their horse. And a number are for similar reasons. So that alone shows that there are people who like the'quirky' type. I'm not saying I totally disagree but what if something happened to you if you could no longer keep said horse? Would all these quirky horses be destroyed?
My horse does have a home with me for life. Not because no one else could handle her/ look after her better than me, but because I love her. But God forbid catastrophe struck and I had no choice but to part with her, no way would she see a bullet because of my own stubbornness. And yes, she has her 'quirks' but what horse doesn't (some might call it character).

I fully appreciate there are those who truly need experience, or injury would prevent a horse being passed on but I don't think these are what the op was referring to
Click to expand...
Surely in the event of catastrophe if your horse was a long term resident of up to and over twenty years you would not pass it on just because it still has life in it sometimes a bullet is the kindest option
 
PStarfish said:
Interestingly a number of people have commented on this post that no one else would want their horse. And a number are for similar reasons. So that alone shows that there are people who like the'quirky' type. I'm not saying I totally disagree but what if something happened to you if you could no longer keep said horse? Would all these quirky horses be destroyed?
My horse does have a home with me for life. Not because no one else could handle her/ look after her better than me, but because I love her. But God forbid catastrophe struck and I had no choice but to part with her, no way would she see a bullet because of my own stubbornness. And yes, she has her 'quirks' but what horse doesn't (some might call it character).
I fully appreciate there are those who truly need experience, or injury would prevent a horse being passed on but I don't think these are what the op was referring to[/QUOTE

Yes, you're right, I was on my phone so I don't think I made my point very clearly. I wasn't referring to those horses who have injuries or behavioural issues.

I meant your normal everyday horse, like mine was. There was nothing wrong with him, he'd never been lame, colicked or even reared but he was a bit weird!

One of the 2 had to go for time and financial reasons and I was worried that no one would either want him or that they wouldn't look after him like I did. I was totally wrong and think he's actually benefited hugely.

I just think it's a weird horse thing, like it's an achievement to have a perfectly normal horse that's difficult when the reality is that it isn't as bad as you think!
Click to expand...
 
I see it like this - I've spent 6+ years getting to know Ned (inc. almost 2 years actually owning him), so I like to think I know him pretty well. If someone else was to look after him (for the sake of argument, they know nothing about him) then they would likely make a lot of mistakes I did in the beginning and that would be detrimental to him. They also might make him 100% better, who knows, but I don't like to take the chance.

That said, if I'm doing something wrong, I'd like people to tell me :)
 
Having seen some examples of stable management on another thread, which some people obviously find perfectly acceptable, I certainly won't be taking the risk of selling any of mine on.

I like my horses to be able to lie out full length on their beds, even if they are mucky creatures who mix everything up into a mess, or who prefer to lie with their heads in a nice warm patch and make hay soup in their water trugs, every night.
 
Not read all so sorry if repeating.
I think it's the fear of the unknown and also previous experience. Like pearlsigner says reading other people's opinions (some people stating they would do what suits them regardless of effect on the horse) and seeing things at various other yards would make me anxious.
When my horse went on full livery I visited three times - once by appointment, unannounced and with my husband and was still anxious when I moved. The care at the yard was actually better than I could give.
All of my animals are with me for life though - I've never been the type to pass something on and will make sacrafices to ensure my animals comes first, get the best and everything they need. Other people would say it's just an animal to justify their own actions, for me my animals come first.
It's also an issue of control - if you sell something on, you can't guarantee its future. We generally hear of the horror stories but that's enough to put me off. I would vet a home very carefully,but what happens if the horse was sold on again - hear awful stories about people buying back emactiated and abused horses!
I'm too soft, I know that - put it down to reading black beauty too many times as a kid!
 
It occurred to us we had no idea how he loaded, so earlier in the day we popped the ramp down and walked him on. You could visibly see his face melt, his head went down, his eyes went dull, and he stood on the truck looking the saddest I've ever seen a horse look, completely ignoring his hay net. It was like he'd gone "oh well, it was nice while it lasted, here we go again"

I think it would break his heart and soul to be sold on again no matter how good the home was.


Oh that must have been so sad to see - poor Thom. Very glad he found such a loving home eventually!
 
Mrs G said:
It occurred to us we had no idea how he loaded, so earlier in the day we popped the ramp down and walked him on. You could visibly see his face melt, his head went down, his eyes went dull, and he stood on the truck looking the saddest I've ever seen a horse look, completely ignoring his hay net. It was like he'd gone "oh well, it was nice while it lasted, here we go again"

I think it would break his heart and soul to be sold on again no matter how good the home was.


Oh that must have been so sad to see - poor Thom. Very glad he found such a loving home eventually!
Click to expand...

Good grief, how will he ever cope with going to a show?
 
Mrs G said:
It occurred to us we had no idea how he loaded, so earlier in the day we popped the ramp down and walked him on. You could visibly see his face melt, his head went down, his eyes went dull, and he stood on the truck looking the saddest I've ever seen a horse look, completely ignoring his hay net. It was like he'd gone "oh well, it was nice while it lasted, here we go again"

I think it would break his heart and soul to be sold on again no matter how good the home was.


Oh that must have been so sad to see - poor Thom. Very glad he found such a loving home eventually!
Click to expand...

That must have been so sad to see.
Reminds me of our little companion, who, when a third pony came to join us stood at the back of her stable with her head down looking so forlorn. We guessed that being a little Dartmoor she'd worked out that when a bigger pony arrived she was going off somewhere new. It took us days to convince her that she was going nowhere, that the newbie was an additional friend.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top