Why have horses if you don't even like them?!?

Kokopelli

Kokopelli

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Sorry just really angry today for no reason really but I've been walking around the house really angry whilst sobbing eating Ben and Jerry's! What I'd do without them :p

Basically spoke to a friend today who got her horse around the same time I got Koko and she rung me yesterday and we was having a nice chat and the I asked her when she was off to ride her horse next and she said
"ohh I can't be bothered with him, my mums riding him whilst I'm on half term" I was kind of shocked by this so we finished our convo and today her mum rung me saying that said girl has not even been to see her horse in 2 weeks :mad: she then plans to take him BSing on saturday will get annoyed at him for not jumping well due to the fact she hasn't bothered to ride him then go for a further 2 weeks without seeing him!!

It just annoys me becuase all this time she's not spending with her horse I could have spent with Koko. I would have loved to have an extra 2 weeks with him even if it was just to say goodbye. She doesn't know how lucky she is and why have a horse if you don't even want it? Its crazy!!

Why did Koko get taken from me and I loved him so much whereas her horse will probably remain in this routine for years and years and the word love will never come to her mind!! It just do good things happen to good people?

I see horses out in fields covered in ragwort and they will live for years yet my field was so well managed and looked after yet Koko became ill! He was so looked after aswell, some may say pampered but he was happy and thats all that matters!

I'm just so annoyed at the world at the moment for taking my beautiful boy and had to get it off my chest as there is no one home to talk to about it!

I know you're all getting fed up with my morbid posts now so I'll share my Ben and Jerry's with you :)
 
dont feel that people are getting fed up of your posts, i dont know your story but i have recently lost my 2 best friends, 1 over a year ago, the other much more recently and there are days i sit and cry. I cant promise that the pain will go away because mine hasnt but you learn to live with it xx BIG HUGS.
 
No, you're right. A lot people (me included) don't tend to appreciate things until they're not there anymore. Reading stories like yours does make me feel more grateful for what I've got but some people don't have the same empathy.

Lots of hugs xxx
 
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Its a cruel cruel situation, i've had these thoughts many a time too, I love my animals with all my heart, they have their jabs, they see the dentist, vets, farrier, get wormed etc, all regular, and I always seem to get injuries or lose them to illness/injury far too early, then I look around, just like you say, and see these people who really do not care, the horses neglected etc, and it makes me sieve, BUT you can console yourself that the time you had with Koko, even though it was cut short, it was a good time and he was loved and cared for, and maybe someday you'll share that same love with another neddy, who'll be just as lucky, take care and if you need to have a good cry, it always makes me feel better x
 
dont apologise for your posts, i cant imagine what your going through.

I understand where your coming from, people should appreciate what they have as they done realise until its gone. Surely after seeing what your going through and how hard it is for you it would make your friend think about her horse and spending time with him.

I hope you feel better soon and Koko looked like a lovely horse and by the sounds of things he had a lovely owner and was very well looked after. x
 
orsolya80 said:
If you want some more Ben & Jerry's, I stocked up at Morrisons the other day and am willing to share! Big hugs to you, must be so tough to lose your horse and then see someone being so indifferent to theirs. :(
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I have a freezer full in an assortment of flavours, my mum went to Morrisons and must have just bought the whole freezer full!

It's really tough, I just want to slap her and make her realise what she is missing out on and that it could all be over tomorrow, lifes too short to waste it (coming from the person whose been led in bed all day stuffing her face) :p
 
Firstly Big hugs!! You've been to hell and back in the last few wks!!
Secondly these people exist no matter what we do in life they always expect things to be handed to them on a plate whilst we're struggling away to get there! The girl I share my yard with is very like this, took pony out to hunter trial (pony only gets ridden once a wk) took it round 90cm course, then went to take it round 115cm course and wondered why it got eliminated at 3rd fence, hmmm!!! :mad: You just have to rise above these people because at the end of the day the time you had with Koko was far more valuable than the years she will have with her horse. You will have learnt so much from him, and had so much fun with him! and thirdly I believe alot in fate and that everything happens for a reason!! I know its cruel now, but every cloud has a silver lining, Koko was just a part of your journey with horses and sure he will have lead you onto more opportunities...
Hugs!!!
 
I'm so sorry about you loosing Koko, life isn't fair i'm afraid.

I have to agree with you though. I know of several people, with very smart horses that sit in a field/stable all week and then get dragged out at the weekend to go competing. Again, when it all goes wrong it's of course the horses fault:mad:

Please dont forget though that you showed Koko more love during the short time you had him than this other poor horse will probably ever feel. Im sure he knew how much he was loved right until the end.

Enjoy your Ben and Jerry's xxxx
 
It is ok to feel your loss. Can I just ask ... are you getting another horse? If not why not? I lost my lovely big spotty horse with laminitis 5 years ago - I was so heartbroken. The very next day my friends made me go out and look at another horse that I had half considered buying - and my other half bought him for me, I still have him and that now makes 3 but there is not a day goes by when I don't think of my old boy.
Have you thought about taking on this horse belonging to your friend? Just an idea.
Hope you have found someone to paint Koko for you. Keep smiling and I really don't think people mind if you keep mentioning Koko - you should feel happy that the people on this forum look upon you fondly, from what I have read. :)
 
Ah dont worry about the posts, thats what were here for. :)

It is soo fustrating what some people are like, i dont have a horse but a pony for my daughter, i took her down yesterday to ride it was raining and her pony was in, she still rode with a rain jacket on, why wouldnt she, he cant stand in, somebody said to me god id rather leave my horse in the box than ride in the rain???:confused: It makes me so angry just cos you dont want to get wet you cant leave a horse in the stable!!!! Some people just dont deserve horses.

I know its hard but youve done sooo well and been really brave and got back in the saddle too. Keep your chin up and munch your way through your ben and jerrys:D;). I swear it does help!!!

And you can hide your head up and say you gave Koko the best care he could have had. :)
 
I feel so sorry for you having been a long time lurker I read your progress and it is such a shame it ended so soon you looked amazing together and at least while he was with you he was loved happy and well cared for. I hate seeing people with horses that dont appreciate them as I have waited years to get my boy I know its not the same as loosing koko but people dont appreciate what they have all the same.
 
Thank you everyone, it is so frustrating seeing these poor horses being unloved yet they have to suffer that way for ages. Perhaps its true that you can have too much of a good thing

Suenrox- I am getting another horse but I can't bare looking yet as I just end up crying looking at adverts, if a horse falls at my feet and I like then will probably buy but I'm not physcially looking as its not fair on the new horse to be comapred to Koko. I would offer to take on friends horse but its a 16.2 little bit quirky showjumper and I struggle riding something that big because of my size especially a naughty one.
 
i dont like people like this at all. at least you had a great time with koko just think of all your happy memories :) i cant go a day without seeing mine at least once, and if im stuck at work it hurts me not to be able to go up. seriously your great and we cant get sick of your posts, big hugs :) xxx
 
I no exactly how you feel. Id do anything to have one last day with Speedy :( ... It really annoys me when people act like this! Theres two liveries at our yard who never ever ride, one is left in its stable 24/7, one is left in the field with dreadfully long feet!! Life just isnt fair unfortunatly and these people will never understand how we feel!!
 
Oh have a hug hunny.

It's pants. You talk all you need to.

When I lost Tiggy I played the same track in my car over and over and over and over again. Must have driven family and friends nuts! But the music worked for me. Good job I had long commutes :o

Have a hot choccy to go with the B&J :)
 
Mmm hot choccy and B&J hopefully will do the trick

I had a lovely letter from his old owners the other day which stated how from birth to death all he had was love, he was such a lucky horse and I was so lucky to spend some of that time with him
 
You did better than Tiggy's old owner then. When I rang to tell them I had some bad news, the woman's mother didn't even remember Tigs. Then when she did she said 'Oh, that spotted thing!' (Tigs was Appaloosa(sp!)) in a most condescending voice. Cut me up that did.

Koko was a very special lad and he had a very special life. You were both very lucky.

More hugs.
 
I feel exactly the same as the OP and I haven't even lost my old girl yet. When she does go though, I shall be so relieved to never have to see so many sad and neglected horses with moronic, ignorant uncaring "owners" ever again, because I will happily leave the horse world as fast as my feet will take me: it will almost make my personal loss worth it. My girl has never had the latest gadgets, fancy (and wildly expensive) rugs, bridles which cost as much a saddle and so on, but what she does get is my personal attention twice a day every day every day. Last night I didn't get home until 8.30pm because I let her snore peacefully over my shoulder for half an hour. I was hungry and tired, but times like that are what I will miss the most when she goes.
 
Don't worry - they'll come a massive cropper one of these days.

I can't help you over Koko's loss, nor tell you what to do about moving on and another horse in, but the sobbing and anger are to be expected and far better than holding in the tears and frustration about 'why ME?'

There are enough shoulders on here to cry on. Most of us have been through what you have and emerged a bit battered and bruised, but otherwise intact and gone on to love again.

Chip up and feel free to rant as often as you want. That girl needs a kick up the ar53.
 
Kokopelli said:
Mmm hot choccy and B&J hopefully will do the trick

I had a lovely letter from his old owners the other day which stated how from birth to death all he had was love, he was such a lucky horse and I was so lucky to spend some of that time with him
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hot choccy plus B&J does sound good! How nice of his previous people to write that letter. :)

If all else fails, just surround yourself with your two favourite men, stay in bed, and post all you need to on here.

Barring that, I've got a bottle of JD that'll be sure to take your mind off things! *joke!* :D;):p
 
There will be so many of us who feel as you do, so don't feel for 1 minute you are on your own, we DO understand The old expression "better to have loved and lost than never loved at all" comes to mind. It is true, believe me, that time does help to mend the scars. You will never forget but in time you'll be able to remember with a smile and a laugh rather than tears.

When my Mum died I found a note in with her will which said, "remember me with laughter and a smile, otherwise don't remember me at all". It took me a long time to do that, she didn't want me to be sad, now 5 years on I can do that...well most of the time anyway!

Loosing "pets" is all part and parcel of being an owner unfortunately. You may not feel like you are lucky at the moment because you are so sad, you are lucky tho because you feel the pain but will also have felt the joy too, some people will never have felt the pleasure you have had and will again in the future. In the meantime bring on the Ben &.....!
 
I don't know if you are ready to do this yet (I have been there too and know the grief you feel!) but how about having something else to ride yourself?

And from this idea my thoughts kindof merged; how about suggesting you help them out with their horse? If she really isn't interested and has other stuff on (you never know she may have lots on her plate or simply have lost interest but feels she has to keep riding) she may be up for it.

The horse will never replace yours, but it might be a win-win situation maybe to help everyone?
 
Unfortunately there are far too many people around like your friend. People who don't want to do any of the day to day looking after having a horse requires or work hard schooling their horses. They just expect to turn up, take their horse out competing and expect it to go well. They are really asking a lot of their poor horses as they are out of practise, some end up getting too excited because they are so glad to be finally doing something and also they are a greater risk of injuring themselves as they are not fit. I also know a lot of people who don't mind riding their horses for hour on end each week but they don't spend any quality time with them and that really annoys me! :mad: Horses aren't just machines, they are living animals with feelings and needs of their own and people shouldn't have horses if they are not prepared to spend time caring for them as well as riding them.

I'm sure Koko realised how well you looked after him and how lucky he was to have an owner like you.
 
I feel the same my horse is looked after and loved, he has had laminitis, got uveitis had a lump removed from his throat and i've not be able to ride for months. Yet others on my yard leave theirs out for days without checking on them. One woman has a grossly over weight horse, her words not mine. And says she isn't bringing him in because she is too lazy to muck out. I do and always will put my horse first. And you and me can sit back and always say we did our very best for them. Which to me and I hope one day for you will be comfort in itself.
 
I agree with everyone else, Koko was extremely lucky to have you to love and look after him, and when you are ready there will be another very lucky horse who will be happy to make their home with you.

Sadly, not everyone is as caring as you are. Sometimes you will meet people who are really only interested in competing/riding with no thought to the horse as a being. There are those who are cavalier about their horse's health/soundness and people who only ever blame the horse for everything that goes wrong and never look to improve themselves.
 
Life isnt fair. Its always the nice people who end up suffering and people like that girl get away with it and her horse never has a problem.
I've seen it happen so many times. My horse can be a real git sometimes and I work bloody hard with him putting everything I have into him and watch other people turn up there horse just does what its told but the thing that keeps me going in I can see the love i his eyes everytime I look at him and these horse just dont have that sparkle.

I lost my 1st horse and felt so low but being around my sisters pony just grooming and the usual yard stuff made me realise I anted my own horse. I never stopped loving mine horse but Pea got me through a very tough time.
 
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