Why is everyone an expert!???

S

Switchthehorse

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Not sure why I am writing this but feel the need to get it off my chest!!

Been having some problems with my mare jumping, and now EVERYONE has an 'idea' or 'constructive criticism', whether they have been riding 2 mins or 50 years!!

Now don't get me wrong I am always open to ideas/suggestions and constructive feedback, but seriously sometimes it would be great if someone could just say 'look where you have come from, you are doing really well keep going'!!!! OR just give me one definitive piece of advice

So far in the past THREE days (!) I have had that I am 'too nervous', I am riding 'too confidentally' she is 'too green', she is 'too bolshy', she is 'too on the forehand', she is 'too lazy', she is 'going to fast', she is 'unbalanced', i am 'overconfident', i need to 'kick more', i need to 'hold her more and keep my leg on but dont kick', i need to 'let her head go', i need to 'shorten my reins', i need to 'lengthen my reins a little', she needs a 'good beating', i need to 'stop hitting her', i need to 'jump her smaller', i need to 'jump her bigger', she 'doesnt respect the fences', she 'is over faced', i need to 'do grid work', i need to 'stop doing grid work and concentrate on one fence at a time', i need to 'bit her up', i need to 'ride her in a snaffle', i need to 'concentrate on technique', i need to 'concentrate on striding', i 'shouldn't worry about striding just about getting her forwards over the fences' etc etc etc

AAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

And not one of these people has actually ridden her!! AND i didn't ask for any advice :)

Sorry i just needed to get that off my chest! Maybe I have 'idiot numpty who needs advice' stamped on my forehead!!??
 
Switchthehorse said:
Not sure why I am writing this but feel the need to get it off my chest!!

Been having some problems with my mare jumping, and now EVERYONE has an 'idea' or 'constructive criticism', whether they have been riding 2 mins or 50 years!!

Now don't get me wrong I am always open to ideas/suggestions and constructive feedback, but seriously sometimes it would be great if someone could just say 'look where you have come from, you are doing really well keep going'!!!! OR just give me one definitive piece of advice

So far in the past THREE days (!) I have had that I am 'too nervous', I am riding 'too confidentally' she is 'too green', she is 'too bolshy', she is 'too on the forehand', she is 'too lazy', she is 'going to fast', she is 'unbalanced', i am 'overconfident', i need to 'kick more', i need to 'hold her more and keep my leg on but dont kick', i need to 'let her head go', i need to 'shorten my reins', i need to 'lengthen my reins a little', she needs a 'good beating', i need to 'stop hitting her', i need to 'jump her smaller', i need to 'jump her bigger', she 'doesnt respect the fences', she 'is over faced', i need to 'do grid work', i need to 'stop doing grid work and concentrate on one fence at a time', i need to 'bit her up', i need to 'ride her in a snaffle', i need to 'concentrate on technique', i need to 'concentrate on striding', i 'shouldn't worry about striding just about getting her forwards over the fences' etc etc etc

AAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

And not one of these people has actually ridden her!! AND i didn't ask for any advice :)

Sorry i just needed to get that off my chest! Maybe I have 'idiot numpty who needs advice' stamped on my forehead!!??
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Do you have any photo's?



:D
 
You need to stop jumping and try dressage!!!:D

Don't let them get to you, just work your way through it and find a way that works for you and your horse. If you are still struggling find an instructor that really knows their stuff and have a couple of lessons, at least then you will know what IS the right thing to be needing to do.
 
I don't know but you have my sympathy . . . and empathy. My current yard is full of people like this, but the worst culprit is the YO. She is a very nice lady and pretty knowledgeable but she feels she can offer "advice" without being asked and it gets right on my nerves. Kal is trickly to ride and came to us pretty weak, green and unbalanced. My trainer has been schooling him for me (three times a week) and we've been working together on helping him have the confidence to balance himself (he was ridden in draw reins before he came to us). J (my trainer) has worked miracles with him . . . but I can't count the number of times YO has leant on the fence and offered unsolicited (and incorrect) advice on how to ride him. I actually won't ride in the school with her b/c I feel so "judged" but thankfully J is able to tune her out and do her own thing. I know she's trying to be helpful - but really . . .

So . . . "look how far you've come - keep going, Hon . . . "

:)

P
 
Ahhh the joys of the unwanted advice...

I see this far more in the horsey world than most other areas I deal with. I suspect we all like to think we know what we're doing and the ultimate proof of that is obviously when we can "help" others with their issues! ;)

I've got a great one at my yard, who will stop me in the middle of an exercise to give me her (unasked for) advice. As I'm dyspraxic, I can only actually work on one thing at a time, which I have explained to her on several occasions, but she still went on and on at me to change "just this one thing, it's a really little change"...in the end I rode off and ignored her. :D

Mind you, she's the one who is unable to do flatwork with her horse unless there are jumps in there because he "just won't"...
 
why1040 said:
Ahhh the joys of the unwanted advice...

Mind you, she's the one who is unable to do flatwork with her horse unless there are jumps in there because he "just won't"...
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mmmm....in my experience the one's who do this are usually the one's who have problems, or never ride because they are scared of their horse, but know all the theory!
 
I've become quite good at not listening, riding off and ignoring people like that!

The only time I'll offer advice is if I KNOW that I have more experience than the rider, or I can see an accident in the making. Mom is an instructor, very knowledgable, very experienced rider, and it amazes me that, even when she has ridden said difficult horse, got it going beautifully, and the rider gets back on that they STILL refuse to listen!
 
I've got very good at nodding and smiling and saying 'yes I'll try that thank you'.....every so often someone actually does offer some advise that is useful!! Not very often but it can happen!! I do tend to switch off though when the advise is coming from the 'none riding experts' that every yard seems to have.
 
I'm giggling a bit that you are complaining about everybody being a self-declared expert - on a website that is full of even more experts!!
 
Switchthehorse said:
So far in the past THREE days (!) I have had that I am 'too nervous', I am riding 'too confidentally' she is 'too green', she is 'too bolshy', she is 'too on the forehand', she is 'too lazy', she is 'going to fast', she is 'unbalanced', i am 'overconfident', i need to 'kick more', i need to 'hold her more and keep my leg on but dont kick', i need to 'let her head go', i need to 'shorten my reins', i need to 'lengthen my reins a little', she needs a 'good beating', i need to 'stop hitting her', i need to 'jump her smaller', i need to 'jump her bigger', she 'doesnt respect the fences', she 'is over faced', i need to 'do grid work', i need to 'stop doing grid work and concentrate on one fence at a time', i need to 'bit her up', i need to 'ride her in a snaffle', i need to 'concentrate on technique', i need to 'concentrate on striding', i 'shouldn't worry about striding just about getting her forwards over the fences' etc etc etc
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Lol made me giggle!!! Luckily our yard isn't like this (then again I ride when it is quiet) but I hear of it far too much!!!
K x

P.S I don't think you could EVER be an expert when it comes to horse riding there is always something new to learn!!
 
We have a plentiful supply of yard experts ;)
It doesn't so much annoy me when people volunteer their unwanted advice as when people preach to you their methods that are obviously the correct and only way of doing it :rolleyes:
 
Forgot to say - usually "okay here you go, you do it!" usually brings out the "Oh I havent got time/injured toenail/need to watch Corrie" excuses out! ;)
K x
 
This made me literally laugh out loud.

I SO know how you feel. I'm bringing on an ex-racer and I get so much unsolicited advice! I've never been one to offer advice much unless I'm asked but I'm even more conscious of it now. It's so annoying!

I've had this horse 2 years, I know her very well. She's in a bit she likes, a saddle she likes and she's learned a lot. I don't rush, I have a trainer, we're doing fine, leave me the heck alone! If I want your advice, I'll ask!

I'm sure you're doing fine, just hit one of those funny little humps we have to get over.
 
Ah, you need a Walkman.

Pop in the ear thingies when you see the advice nuisance approaching, then when advice starts, just point to it and say, "Sorry, the batteries seem to be dead and I can't hear a thing. I'm stone deaf without it".<sweet smile>
 
Imho there aren't that many experts. What there is is a huge number of people with opinions which they believe (rightly or wrongly) deserve an airing.
 
i think it can be difficult for some people to know the difference between butting in with unwanted advice and trying to give people a suggestion that might help and its up to the other person whether they want to take it or not.

sometimes when you are on the ground you see things that the rider has missed and vice versa when you ride your perception of what is happening will be different to those on the ground.

yes i have butted in on occasion..................the time i saw some of the younger members of the yard set up a spread using white plastic picnic chairs or the time i saw a 14yr beat a 4yr old because he didn't understand the questions she was asking him (he had been in work only 1 month).

other times i have walked away, even when i could see that by asking the pony/horse slightly differently the out come would be better or at least different.

i admit there are the "yard experts" out there just to score points on their victim so to speak, but also there people who have a wealth of knowledge and it is up to you whether you use it or not
 
Honey08 said:
I'm giggling a bit that you are complaining about everybody being a self-declared expert - on a website that is full of even more experts!!
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Me too:D

Anyway OP, it's obvious where you're going wrong , all you need is a bit of blue pipe, has no one ever told you that every single issue any horse can ever have is solved by whacking them with a length of blue pipe? Even if one of their legs falls off, you can still solve it by whacking them with a length of blue pipe, and if you call it 'Mr Blue Pipey-wipey' then that makes it even more effective...:p










Actually, I wonder if blue pipes work on people...?
 
Honey08 said:
I'm giggling a bit that you are complaining about everybody being a self-declared expert - on a website that is full of even more experts!!
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lol, I thought that was what the OP was going to write about.........
I think she needs to get a trainer / instructor and make it clear to all concerned that the matter is in hand, and try to avoid conversations about her horse, she could ride with ear plugs in if necessary, peeps will get fed up being ignored. But mainly I would try to school when no one is around.
I can't believe how many people are giving her advice, funnily enough I don't get advice on riding my horse [can you believe that!] but as far as I know no one else does this either.
 
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Funnily enough as soon as i had posted this i though eek everyone will think i mean 'why is everyone an expert on H&H Forum' doh! I didnt actually mean that tho but could be encouraged to start a new thread with the same title :)

I have tried riding with my ipod, they just seem to shout louder!? I hadn't tried the blue pipe whatsit, maybe that is the answer to everything!!??

Ironically last night I had a jumping lesson.. about 8 people watched (darn it, i am booking them later and later but people keep turning up, i think i should start charging!?), I stuck my new shiny bondage style bit in her mouth for more brakes, set my face in a determined 'look' if such a thing exists and cantered off to tackle a 30cm fence... :)

Anyway after the lesson i had more 'expert help', ironically from most people who don't actually jump, more of the same but some interesting new ones such as 'give it oats' and 'maybe you should stop jumping for good' and the one that wins the prize for now.. (she's a grey) - 'she has changed colour and got a lot lighter, i am sure she jumped better when she was darker?'.. the one opinion i really wanted was from my instructor as he had seen her 'behaviour' at a show last weekend (reared, tanked off four times, jumped a fence backwards, eliminated etc) and what was his expert advice???...

.. she's a b*tch, she goes into the ring and sets her neck runs through her shoulder and completely ignores you. Being her size and your strength and her determination to get her own way, well... there is nothing you can do about it....

I guess I pack up now and take up knitting!!???? HELP EXPERTS HELP!!! Anyone got any oats!??
 
MrsD123 said:
I think she needs to get a trainer / instructor and make it clear to all concerned that the matter is in hand,
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Agreed. Though I have met know-alls who just won't take a hint then get all shirty when their crap advice is ignored. Not only that, but these know-alls savour any mishap that befalls you.
 
Switchthehorse said:
the one opinion i really wanted was from my instructor as he had seen her 'behaviour' at a show last weekend (reared, tanked off four times, jumped a fence backwards, eliminated etc) and what was his expert advice???...

.. she's a b*tch, she goes into the ring and sets her neck runs through her shoulder and completely ignores you. Being her size and your strength and her determination to get her own way, well... there is nothing you can do about it....
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You SO need another instructor.
 
Yup, agree with that. A lesson with a different instructor would be sooo much cheaper than enough hair dye to make her darker again. (That's so funny)

And really, a different instructor with a new perspective may be able to give you something that might help.
 
Uh -
1) get another instructor who will get on and show you what to do if necessary, and can actually fix the problem.
2) If your horse won't be bothered by it and you want a laugh - pick the most annoying expert, and ask them to do it if they're so clever! Did that once - was absolutely hilarious, I nearly had tears rolling down my face I was laughing so much. 'Expert' came well and truly unstuck (literally) and my horse told them without a doubt what an idiot they were!
 
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