Will I ever get my confidence back?

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siant2

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I bought my horse a year ago and within a few months I was fairly confident jumping her 2 ft to 2 ft 6 inch classes, I wouldnt say I was massively confident but once i got going I was OK and we regularly getting placed,

However in Feb I had a nasty fall jumping- she stopped - I didnt and i went flying and broke and dislocated my elbow.... 6 weeks later I was back riding with no problem but I still havent got back showjumping - everytime I think about jumping I get really nervous and cant do it.....

So ive booked a lesson for next week in the hope that i can build my confidence back! Im really worried obviously about falling off again and not getting my confidence back .... my horse is not exactly the most sensible when it comes to jumping and often reselmbles a wound up spring and you have to keep your leg on incase she stops, but not too much or she rushes!!!!

Any tips on how i can stop being so bloody stupid! I have ridden all my life (24 years) and ive fallen off countless times and previously never seriously hurt myself! I dont feel I have any issues with riding my horse - its just jumping!!!

Maybe I need a serious a**se kicking??!!! Please help???
 
Don;t under estimate your nerves. They can be mended, but will take time.

Would it not be possible to get a few lessons on a schoolmaster type horse? At least that way you could just concentrate ojn your and your position, rather than worrying about the horse too.

I'm sure it would be money well spent.
 
When I was 16 I fell off and fractured my pelvis. Like you, I'd falle off countles times before and never lost my confidence. This fall was different. I'm 21 now, had two horses since, completed an Equine degree and I'm only just getting my confidence back really. But I'm doing it!

I now have my new horse Freddie, who I looked for six months to find. And I feel pretty brave on him. He does have his moments as he's still only a baby, but I feel like I can deal with them. This is the first time I've felt like this in a long time and it's great. I've just forced myself to ignore that fear that eats you up inside and get on with things. It really is the only way to combat it. Just do it! Keep telling yourself to relax, concentrate on your breathing, talk to your horse, talk to yourself, and just go for it!

I don't know what it is about Freddie that's made me feel confident, especially seeing as I was looking for a confidence giver and ended up with a newly backed 4yo, lol, but sometimes I think horses and riders just click. When we've had a good day I feel like we could conquer the world, lol.

Good luck with getting your nerve back. I know how frustrating it can be not being able to what you love. I hope you find that enjoyment again soon xxx
 
Don't panic, a loss of confidence is horrible but you will get it back. lessons are vital, a good instructor will understand how to help. Keep the fences small and work on your flatwork. You would be amazed how many riders are nervous jumping, you are definitely not alone! Best of luck
 
You have to consider if SJ is what you want to do, or if you would be happy with flatwork.
If SJ is a real 'yes' for you then hope is not lost. There are so many books/magazine artciles etc with advice on confidence and nerves. There is even one in Horse Mag's last issue.
You could seek advice from a therapist specialising in sports ; a NLP specialist (nero linguistic programming - suggest looking up on web), or CBT (cognitive behavioural programming - again see web for explanation)
I broke my back in 2005 and my confidence goes up and down but I am riding and I don't feel nearly as nervous as I did. You'll get there if you want to but be prepared to ask your instructor to go back to basics and take very small steps. Don't overface yourself!
 
every one has there own issues so dont feel stupid or alone!!! im more than happy to jump 1m40 plus sj and go hunting but ill just about manage to jump 2"9 xc at a push!!! silly i know, but take things at your own time and dont let anyone push you to do things you dont want to do and dont compare yourself to anyone else, there will always be someone who can jump higher, faster and wider but you should just concentrate on youself!!! find a good instructer and maybe take friend with you for support??? good luch though and let us know how it goes
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You will get your confidence back, I am sure. Don't worry...

I also managed to dislocate my elbow a good 2 months ago (is that en vogue these days... 'cos I can totally do without this trend!!!). Not nice. Can totally understand why you are insecure now. With me, it happened on a hack... and I did not feel confident on my first hack after that fall to be honest. First hack since was last week on a very well behaved thoroughbred, a plodder really, and I was really scared, for some reason. Would actually have preferred jumping!!! Obviously, we seem to associate the activity in which the fall occurred with the accident, and thus seem to think that it's gonna happen again all the time!

Can you fully stretch your arm yet??? I'd be so jealous, because I can't!!!!
 
I lost my confidence about a year ago when trying out a horse to buy- it broncked across the menage and I when flying. Didn't hurt myself but it shocked the hell out of me. Since then have had one mare who was on box rest pretty much from day 1 and I lost my nerve with her (or probably never actually got a chance to get it back after the broncker), and gave her away to a friend. Felt like a right horsey numpty at that point and confidence was at a complete low.
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I now have another youngster who, truth be told, was probably one "level" up from what I needed to get my confidence back. But I've had lessons on him and every time I ride him my confidence grows and grows, and every time he's a bit naughty and I cope with it fine, my confidence shoots up. So much so that I did a little bit of jumping in my lesson last weekend, just a small jump in trot so I had more control with less momentum. I then did some more with him on my own yesterday, put the jumps up and took them in canter (well in the loosest bounciest sense of the word!) . And it was great!
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You will get it back, I promise
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This may sound like a funny thing tosay but a few years back I was reading an agony aount collum in Pony Mag and a peice of edvice in there was to pretned to be a rider you'd like to be so that day I was pretending to be Pippa Funnel whildt riding a bucking mad 12.1 27yr old pony and then again whildt jumping an ex race horse lively lady. It's worked wonders for me
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Mind you I have also started talking to my horse wich worries me abit when i realised I was telling it about Britains got Talent!!!

I'm sure you'll be at the olympics before you know it!!!! Good luck with your lesson let us know how it goes
 
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