Would you get another horse?

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Turks

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Hi, pretty new to this forum.

Sadly had to have my boy pts recently. Am in a bit of a quandary over whether to buy another. I've always had horses but get quite frustrated and disheartened by my riding ability (particularly during winter while mostly schooling).

I struggle to change/improve. I find lessons (variety of trainers) stressful for this reason and fear that I will carry on in this rut with another horse which neither of us will enjoy. I don't do anything horrendous but I know that the horses I ride are not in front of the leg or using themselves most of the time (I tend to get spells of it but only towards end of the session). Tension related probably.

I'm having schoolmaster lessons at the moment and riding other horses but am in danger of turning them into my old horse.

Has anyone else been in this rut and what helped you out of it? At what stage do you say it's better for the horse-world if I don't...? How many of us really break those shocking old bad habits but spend a fortune hoping that we will?

Any advice? Thanks...

:confused:
 
Bloomin heck don't be too harsh on yourself!

None of us are perfect at riding!

If you want another horse, and you have the means to support one properly, go for it!

;)
 
I think you're being much too hard on yourself. Carry on with your schoolmaster lessons and decide when the weather's a bit better. I'm so sick of Winter I struggle to make myself get on the horse, never mind schooling it.
 
Whatever level you ride at ,there is always a higher level .So dont beat your self up if you arnt where you think you should be.Make the most of riding while you can ,because old age comes far too soon and then you really have to get used to the idea that you cant ride as well as you want.It takes a while to get over the grief of loosing a horse. So take it slow and the right horse will find you (they are clever like that;) )
 
Very sorry to hear of your boy that passed, and you sound awfully low on confidence :-(

I think you are being far too hard on yourself, winter sucks and some of us focus on 'should I be doing more schooling?' 'is the horse using itself properly?' and 'am I riding correctly? what am I doing wrong now?', it all gets very serious and it depends on the environment you expose yourself to whether you feel like other people are doing better, or progressing faster.

Try to remember there are people out there who have never had lessons, or at least not decent lessons, who wouldn't even know what you're talking about when you talk of schooling, you are no doubt better than many people out there purely because you TRY! Heck you're almost certainly better than me, I haven't ridden for a while and feel like I'm going to fall off as soon as I have mounted at the mo!

Does it matter how quickly you improve if you enjoy the process? You could always save up and buy a schoolmaster or something a bit more 'ready made' if you feel that would help, do you think you're taking it too seriously and need to embrace a bit of light hearted fun and canters in the countryside?
 
Sorry about your boy.

My two elderly mares were pts the last 18 months. I was devestated as we did showing and were doing well and i loved them loads. Hubby bought me a new mare after the first old gal died and i didn't think id like her but after my other girl was pts i realise i needed a horse to function.

Its different for everyone. My saying is never say never xxc
 
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Am so sorry about your horse having been pts. It's a miserable time.

What intrigues me about your thread is that having read it, I have no idea WHY you want to ride/have another horse. I presume it's not just to school? Do you love to hack, hunt, do dressage, Long Distance, amble out for a gossip and to admire the countryside with your friends or enjoy your own company (like me), take your child out, or just love being around horses?

At the moment your horse life sounds a bit sad and drab - like being at school - an endless round of trying to achieve - what? and beating yourself up over your perceived standards - which incidentally are probably a lot better than you rate yourself.

If it's really as bleak as this, I would think hard before getting another horse, at least for the present. These are hard times, horses are expensive to keep, can be exclusive to the rest of your life "so sorry, must dash, got to go and do the horse", tie up an inordinate amount of time and, as you are so hard on yourself, perhaps there is another hobby/pastime that you feel you do better at, and enjoy more.

I do hope you come to a wise decision. what do your friends think?
 
Rose Folly said:
Am so sorry about your horse having been pts. It's a miserable time.

What intrigues me about your thread is that having read it, I have no idea WHY you want to ride/have another horse. I presume it's not just to school? Do you love to hack, hunt, do dressage, Long Distance, amble out for a gossip and to admire the countryside with your friends or enjoy your own company (like me), take your child out, or just love being around horses?

At the moment your horse life sounds a bit sad and drab - like being at school - an endless round of trying to achieve - what? and beating yourself up over your perceived standards - which incidentally are probably a lot better than you rate yourself.

If it's really as bleak as this, I would think hard before getting another horse, at least for the present. These are hard times, horses are expensive to keep, can be exclusive to the rest of your life "so sorry, must dash, got to go and do the horse", tie up an inordinate amount of time and, as you are so hard on yourself, perhaps there is another hobby/pastime that you feel you do better at, and enjoy more.

I do hope you come to a wise decision. what do your friends think?
Click to expand...

A post worth serious thought . not entirely sure that the comment about other pastimes is relevant . You know where you want to be.
 
what awful news to hear about your boy,

i get exactly where you are coming from, i bought my boy, an ex-racehorse to re-school and sell, but in the year i've had him we have got no where and it really makes me question my ability, so now i am putting him on loan and finding time for myself to work out if i would be happier not to have the pressure of the welfare of a horse, and to give him some time with someone else who has more time for him which is exactly what he needs.

my advice to you would be carry on riding others but wait to get your own and find horsey friends who you can hack out with and just have fun on something that you don't need to school, this will help you regain the memories of what made you start riding, and when you're ready find a nice loan horse because there are many people like me who need to put their horse on loan because of many reasons.

also by the sounds of it you just need to go on a worry free gallop!!:p
 
I had my horse on a competition yard and was constantly frustrated as I could see everyone was better than me, more confident, went to more competitions etc. I was always the one who came last and had a fight with my naughty horse, or who fell off. Lessons didn't help much. My horse was a nightmare because of my tension.
I moved to a farm and just hacked out. I remembered the fun I used to have with my old mare exploring bridleways, galloping in fields, jumping ditches. So that's what I did and I began to enjoy it and so did my horse. I joined a nice friendly RC and started jumping again without anyone judging me - I actually did ok and got a few rosettes. I'll never be a brilliant rider but I have a very happy, go-anywhere horse and I feel very proud when people say how far we've come from him being a monster who wouldn't leave the yard.
You need to take a step back and think about what it is you enjoy about riding. What will you miss if you don't have another horse? Maybe go and ride other people's for a bit and work out what you like and don't like? Then think about what to buy or loan. Maybe a youngster/project would suit you more so you can have the satisfaction of bringing one on?
 
Thanks v. much for all your help.

I do enjoy show-jumping and xc - when eventing I scrabble through the dressage and hope no-one's looking (judge included). Yes - I think this time of year is rubbish and I need to get out in the fields as soon as they dry up.

I used to absolutely love taking my boy jumping round the fields. I will also hang on to my memory of the last time I took him out - to Bibury ride and he was absolutely lovely and gave me the best ride I've ever had (he enjoyed it). It was one of those really special days (all of you will know what I mean!).

I will do as advised and ease up from schooling and do a spot of jumping. I can't ride out of the arena at the moment for a few reasons I won't bore people with.

I will take time to think about what I'd like in another horse. I'd hate to buy a lovely schoolmaster and make it worse! My previous boy hadn't jumped really before I had him. I really enjoyed bringing him on in that respect. He grew into a superstar of a jumper who had the ability to jump anything from anywhere and didn't really know how to refuse. I would have to be v. v. lucky to find another with his ability that got us out of trouble more times than I care to remember...

I think best is not to rush into things and try to just enjoy times now.

Thanks again.:)
 
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