Would you go to a pub on your own?

M

mhorses

Well-Known Member
Joined
28 December 2010
Messages
508
Location
UK
Visit site
I am single and hace been for 3 years now. I think I need to get out and meet new people, however I have recently moved to a new part of the country and have no close friend nearby to ask out to the pub with me. Would it seem very unusual for a 20 something to land up to the pub on their own. I never imagined myself having to be in this position before!!
 
I joined the local orchestra and met my future husband (the conductor!). Obviously no help at all unless you are a musician but slightly cheesy suggestion about joining clubs/interest groups etc.
 
I don't go to bars, but I've been to several restaurants by myself! Including my favourite Vietnamese in China Town. They now recognise me and know my order haha!
 
I think if you are the sort of person who can chat to people straight away you'll be fine! I would be too shy but my friend at Uni used to go out to bars and pubs by herself regularly and met loads of guys that way! Make sure, of course, that someone knows that you are there though in case of weirdos.

I often sit in cafes or restaurants alone; I quite like it. I usually have a 'book barrier' though and I don't know if you could read a book in a pub!? I know my dad sits on his own in the corner of our local reading his newspaper, pint in hand, but think that's different lol :)
 
Small trick i learned years ago, if you feel uncomfortable walking into a new/strange pub.
Walk in and go straight to the ladies , spend a couple minutes powdering your nose ;), and then walk out to the bar! People wont be looking at you so much as they might when you walk through the front door!! Worked for me!
 
I would. I've been on plenty of courses etc away from home and gotten fed up of sitting on my own in hotel bedrooms, so have gone on my own to pubs. Take a book or a paper to read in case you don't find anyone to talk to. Generally sitting at the bar will get you engaged in conversation pretty quickly.
 
Why not try getting a job working behind the bar in the local pub for 1 or 2 nights a week , then you get to know the locals and meet new people , also a safer way of doing things especially if your shy, lack confidence or are weary of meeting new people, conversation is a lot easier with strangers when you are serving them a drink and have 3ft of bar between them and you :D and as an added bonus you also get paid:) much easier to go for a drink in a pub on your own if you work there.:cool:
 
Another tip is aways have a few open ended questions planned (how what where etc) so that if there's a lull in any conversation you can slip in a question that camn't be killed with a straight yes or no. So you could for example ask the bar tender when you get your drink 'how busy does it get in here?'
 
No, having worked it a bar for years it would be very bizarre to see a lady on her own in there.

Is there any clubs you can join?
 
I don't like my own company particularly so no probably not! Much more a people person, although if I didn't know anyone in the area I probably would give it a go, take a book or an iPad to make it look like I was doing something while scouting the pub! Lol :) good luck!
 
Yes really, it's very very rare to see a lady on her own in a bar round here unless they are coming in to meet a group of mates. Maybe it's different out in t'sticks ;)
 
CalllyH said:
Yes really, it's very very rare to see a lady on her own in a bar round here unless they are coming in to meet a group of mates. Maybe it's different out in t'sticks ;)
Click to expand...

Yes it is, thank gord :p!
We have four pubs and a leageon (sp) club here in the village, and i wouldnt worry at all about going out by myself, and i doubt anyone would think it odd!
Having said that i probably wouldnt in a city pub! So maybe you are right and i am wrong! :)
 
Yes, I've worked in countryside pubs for 5 years and new people to the area would often come in alone, and 4 months later be a member of the pub family :D (admittedly everyone was a secret alcoholic)
 
If you're anywhere near Basingstoke, Ill meet you in a pub....we can scare people off with horse-natter....!! ;)
Q
 
And I regularly go to pubs alone. City pubs and country lane pubs (in the Army so have always had to make new friends every couple of years!)
Q
 
castleboy said:
Why not try getting a job working behind the bar in the local pub for 1 or 2 nights a week , then you get to know the locals and meet new people , also a safer way of doing things especially if your shy, lack confidence or are weary of meeting new people, conversation is a lot easier with strangers when you are serving them a drink and have 3ft of bar between them and you :D and as an added bonus you also get paid:) much easier to go for a drink in a pub on your own if you work there.:cool:
Click to expand...

I would definitely second this suggestion! When I was young, free and single (MANY years ago!!) I worked in a number of local pubs. You only need to do a night or two and you will meet all the locals and earn a few bob in the meantime! You get to hear all the gossip, what's going on and who is worth knowing!! It is hard work, but fun - recommended! :D
 
I wouldn't, because if a group of friends came in they'd be unlikely to go talk to the (perceived) sad lonely in the corner! And if they was a serious enough drinker to hang out in pubs alone chatting to randoms, they'd not be the sort of person I want for a close friend/boyfriend. Lads may chat to you if you're at the bar alone, but they're probably out on the pull and only after one thing, so unless you're the same why bother? Going to a cafe or restaurant on your own is totally different IMO. Maybe its just me, but though I've been in loads of pubs/bars with friends/boyfriends, I've never made friends/met a boyfriend in those places.
 
Not following the pub thread per se! Have you thought about joining your local young farmers. No need to be a farmer, great social life, loads of events, night do's, dinner dances etc. Regular meetings that are fun and often finish in the pub!!
I met my OH through YF, he is the farmer and I'm the horsey bird lol :D
 
I am in a similar position - just moved to area, everyone at work and yard is very nice but seems to be either half or twice my age! Any other hobbies I can think of doing I think I wouldn't want to be friends with the kind of people I'd probably meet - haha.
So I've just gone and done it and emailed my local young farmers :D Thanks Wil! I hope there are some other young-but-not-so-young-uns there...
 
Fii I have worked in my fair share of them and I don't recall many women coming in alone. No reason why not though, as long as you stay safe. Personalky, I would get a bar job. I've been into my pub a few times on my own once I got to know people from behind the bar, and its much less intimidating to do it that way :)
 
You could buy a newspaper and sit at the end of the bar reading then doing the crossword - eventually someone will talk to you. Go down there at a quiet time - say a Saturday/Sunday late lunchtime or early evening say around 6.30pm. That way you will gradually get to know the staff/locals.

This way you don't look the "desperate" type! Wait for them to come to you - be careful though - some of these guys are seriously only after one thing and the women won't trust you not to run off with them!
 
Last edited:
Back in my single days I lived about 20 mins from NYC. I was at a stage I didn't want to hang out with racetrackers and I wanted to learn the city. So I cowboy'd up and starting going into the city on my own. I am quite shy but pushed myself to do this. It was brilliant and I met so many interesting people and learned to get anywhere in that city. Years later it would serve me well when my future husband would call me all sauced up not knowing exactly where he was. I found him every time.

So yes, do it! I was always cautious but never afraid. Mind you I spent many years criss crossing the USA on my own and used to looking out for myself.

Terri
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top