wwyd dilemma

[Louby]

Thanks Parisexx, Ive never said it before as I still feel so guilty about it but read your post and do feel for you. My boy isnt well at the moment and I fear I will have similar decisions to make in the near future, its not easy, infact its awful. You have been very brave to post your situation on a forum and what ever you decide to do, just think of your horses future then hopefully you will have a clear conscience, Hugs.

 

[sophspot]

I'm genuinely surprised by the answers in this thread.I would only pts with regards to the horse's quality of life, not because I wanted to move out from home. Please think of your long term life changes next time you purchase an animal. I worked 2 jobs to pay for my horse at 17 so i could pay for my horse & yes it was tough put it taught me about

 

[sophspot]

Being responsible .........

 

[Parisexx]

Being responsible is not passing on an old lame horse when u cannot keep her anymorr

 

[babymare]

parisexx. I fully understand how you are feeling. Baby had been abused before i got her resulting in major stress issues which in time i managed but were always there.Add to mix her failng sight, a move for me 45 miles from yard to be with OH,a monthly bill of £300 + a month, petrol &time, elderly mother with dimentia i also had to sit down and make decisions. I could have tried to move baby but i knew, as did people who knew baby, mentally she would not have coped. someone offered to take her but I couldnt pass her off like that given her problems so I planned the day and said sweetdreams to her. i had owned her for 7 years she was my friend,my rock through my own abusive relationship. Oh i did fill guilt at beginning but now i feel relieved. My life is calmer. im no longer living on credit card.My life with my Lovely kind OH is the happiest ive been for many years. But not a day goes by that i dont miss her and some days i still cry. She was 14. guess what im saying(prob very badly) you have to think of your future and that of your OH. Please please if you make that decision do not be hard onself. x X

 

[Goldenstar]

I'm genuinely surprised by the answers in this thread.I would only pts with regards to the horse's quality of life, not because I wanted to move out from home. Please think of your long term life changes next time you purchase an animal. I worked 2 jobs to pay for my horse at 17 so i could pay for my horse & yes it was tough put it taught me about

This is a personal desision it's not a right or wrong situation .
OP has had this horse for six years not six months and few of us have a crystal ball .the economic situation is harsh and the cost of keeping the horse is the difference between paying rent or not being able to .
She's not casting off the horse for someone esle to deal with she's taking responibilty herself if the horse was six everyone would be telling her to sell the mare but she can't sell the mare in this situation .

 

[Goldenstar]

parisexx. I fully understand how you are feeling. Baby had been abused before i got her resulting in major stress issues which in time i managed but were always there.Add to mix her failng sight, a move for me 45 miles from yard to be with OH,a monthly bill of £300 + a month, petrol &time, elderly mother with dimentia i also had to sit down and make decisions. I could have tried to move baby but i knew, as did people who knew baby, mentally she would not have coped. someone offered to take her but I couldnt pass her off like that given her problems so I planned the day and said sweetdreams to her. i had owned her for 7 years she was my friend,my rock through my own abusive relationship. Oh i did fill guilt at beginning but now i feel relieved. My life is calmer. im no longer living on credit card.My life with my Lovely kind OH is the happiest ive been for many years. But not a day goes by that i dont miss her and some days i still cry. She was 14. guess what im saying(prob very badly) you have to think of your future and that of your OH. Please please if you make that decision do not be hard onself. x X

Brave post babymare .

 

[Meowy Catkin]

To quote the BHS's recent article...

'Lets lose the view that good welfare always means keeping animals alive. We can't afford to think like this any longer. Finding a horse a new purpose or new home so we can avoid putting them down really is not always the best solution. Humane euthanasia is far from the worst fate that can befall a horse.'

 

[AdorableAlice]

I'm genuinely surprised by the answers in this thread.I would only pts with regards to the horse's quality of life, not because I wanted to move out from home. Please think of your long term life changes next time you purchase an animal. I worked 2 jobs to pay for my horse at 17 so i could pay for my horse & yes it was tough put it taught me about

Arthritic and unsound. OP could bute it up and loan/sell for a fiver to an unknown future. Or lets throw it into a wet field and 'retire' it. Or the OP could be a responsible owner and ensure a pain free peaceful end.

Some of the comments on the thread are sensible and offered by long term experienced horse owners. Other comments are fanciful, novice, irresponsible and down right ridiculous.

 

[LaMooch]

Not read all the posts but I think this post sums up the original Posters dilemma perfectly and wish more owners would make this decision when in the same position. I wish you best whatever your decision

To quote the BHS's recent article...

'Lets lose the view that good welfare always means keeping animals alive. We can't afford to think like this any longer. Finding a horse a new purpose or new home so we can avoid putting them down really is not always the best solution. Humane euthanasia is far from the worst fate that can befall a horse.'

 

[NellRosk]

I think the bravest and most kindly thing you can do is have her PTS. If I were to sell/ give away a horse like yours it would be because I'm too cowardly and reliant on my own feelings of guilt than to do the right thing by the horse. Better now when she's in relative good health than in a few years when she's suffering more from her arthritis, needing pain meds and being demented by the tormenting feeling of itchiness in summer with her SI. At 25 you must be feeling so cramped and restricted at home so get out there and start living your life together with your OH and don't listen to anyone else's narrow mindedness and clouded views. x

 

[Fairynuff]

A horse is for life, not just for when it suits you. This is something that you need to think about before you buy a horse, no matter whether you were misled. At some point she still would have got to this age. Putting her down for your own benefit is totally irresponsible. When family become a burden we don't give them a meal and 'put them down'. Sorry, I think that you have to find a solution other than the easy way out above. Charities are over-run because of people not thinking about the consequences of buying a horse.

What utter nonsense

 

[sophspot]

Surely the op post is about she can afford to keep her horse but she wants to put the money towards getting a new place with her partner. Plus she's not enjoying being with the horse anymore. To me this is a right & wrong answer ? Yes life throws you tough thing's sickness/divorce/deaths/redundant... Etc... OP I would have my vet out for their opinion and if the horse was happy and able to enjoy life without being in pain everyday I wouldn't pts. End of the day its your horse to with what you wish.

 

[Regandal]

I think you are being responsible. As Goldenstar says, none of us have a crystal ball, and times are hard. The days of a job for life are long gone, and we all do what we have to do. She knows you, it would kinder to let her go whilst in your care. Good luck.

 

[babymare]

Brave? No just honest and realistic. Yes I could have passed her on as said someone wanted her (personally i didnt trust why she offered )but I owed it to baby to be responsible for her. by far worse could have happened to her. x

 

[Parisexx]

I was really worried about posting my dilemma on this for fear of being shot down (scuse the pun!) But u have been really lovely and seen things from mine and the mares point.of view xx

 

[Goldenstar]

Surely the op post is about she can afford to keep her horse but she wants to put the money towards getting a new place with her partner. Plus she's not enjoying being with the horse anymore. To me this is a right & wrong answer ? Yes life throws you tough thing's sickness/divorce/deaths/redundant... Etc... OP I would have my vet out for their opinion and if the horse was happy and able to enjoy life without being in pain everyday I wouldn't pts. End of the day its your horse to with what you wish.

In a nutshell you think its ok for at 25 for OP to have her parents supporting her so she can own a horse and many of us don't .
A horse with an arthritic neck is likely to have a degree of pain .
A vet is no help in making what is an economic decision .

 

[Cortez]

What utter nonsense

Yes, I agree. Who says a horse is for life? Horses are bought and sold (and PTS) every day.

Charities are NOT over run because people don't consider the consequences; they are over run because not enough people are prepared to do the decent thing and TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.

 

[Fairynuff]

Thats what I'd do as well and stay with her to the end. If more people made such a brave decision, we would have fewer neglected old horses.

In a nutshell you think its ok for at 25 for OP to have her parents supporting her so she can own a horse and many of us don't .
A horse with an arthritic neck is likely to have a degree of pain .
A vet is no help in making what is an economic decision .

someone is talking sense

 

[Fairynuff]

Yes, I agree. Who says a horse is for life? Horses are bought and sold (and PTS) every day.

Charities are NOT over run because people don't consider the consequences; they are over run because not enough people are prepared to do the decent thing and TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.[/QUOTE

This^^^^^^^

 

[Mince Pie]

Isn't it funny that recently there have been a lot of comments about people in their 20's should be moving out of home, now we have a 25 year old trying to do just that and she is being shot down! We don't know her home situation, it could be that relations between her and her mum are strained, I also wouldn't expect a non horsey OH to put his plans on hold for an elderly, unrideable horse. The op has given this horse 2 years of quiet retirement, the conditions are only going to deteriorate and if the op is struggling now what will happen when the horse needs daily bute etc?
Op I would pts and enjoy your life with your oh

 

[sophspot]

Goldenstar....lol no that's not what I wrote, its very difficult because no one knows the full financial situation of the op (and quite rightly so !) Again I will say it's not about the horse is in pain and I feel she is suffering should I put to sleep. Which yes I feel she should if she is. Its I want to move out & don't enjoy my horse anymore. Which are two very different scenario's. That's the great thing of forums you get very different answers and people gravitate to what they feel helps them. Yes I know its crap being skint and horse's make us even poorer, I rented my flat on minium wage and I struggled but I wouldn't swap those years with my first horse when he retired, I would always do what's best for my horse... Btw the government are doing some great mortgage offers at the moment on new properties worth chatting to them fir advice too.

 

[LD&S]

OP you have 2 options.

1.) try and find someone else to take this mare on, knowing that once you do there is nothing to stop her ending up having an uncertain future, ending up who knows where and in who knows what state. Yes you might luckily find someone genuine to take her but you don't know that until it's too late. I know I wouldn't take the risk with such an old, unrideable horse.

2.) have her pts knowing she went without realising a thing and that you have secured her future and know she will never ever end up in the wrong hands.

I know which I'd pick, but essentially those are your options. In a nutshell.

Option 2 for me.

 

[hnmisty]

Btw the government are doing some great mortgage offers at the moment on new properties worth chatting to them fir advice too.

Seriously? OP should take out a 95% mortgage with her partner so she can keep an elderly pony alive for a bit longer?

I am sentimental, sometimes overly so. But those going on about keeping the pony going are talking utter tosh IMHO. Animals don't understand death. This pony won't understand that she will be PTS on X date. She won't know what is going to happen even if the marksman waves his gun in her face. For the last time, A DECENT AND DIGNIFIED DEATH IS NOT THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO AN ANIMAL.

No one would bat an eyelid if OP had come on here saying she no longer enjoyed her horse and wanted to be able to save for a deposit so she was planning on selling it. She can't do that, as she has an elderly and unusable pony, and we've all heard enough horror stories about companion pony loans going wrong (so very sorry for those who have had this happen to them). No one would be telling her to keep a young and healthy 7 year old as a field ornament because she's fallen out of love with horses, yet PTS is the only way to ensure your horse's welfare.

I had my old pony for almost 12 year until she was 35. For 6 of those years (the middle 6) I couldn't ride her at all. I wouldn't have parted with her for the world, and it broke my heart when she died, but she was a tie. As much as I wanted a horse I could ride, I would never have got one whilst I still had Misty.

 

[doriangrey]

I am going to get in trouble for this .. but what is it about horses that pts is so much more acceptable? Is it the money aspect? Would the same debate be happening if the OP was talking about a dog or a cat (for instance) that they had for 7 or so years?

 

[Parisexx]

The majority understand were I am coming from thank u xx

 

[Parisexx]

A dog or a cat does not hold the same financial and time burden as a horse? X

 

[touchstone]

It isn't just about costs though is it?

The op has said that she has fallen out of love with horses, why should she tie down the next goodness knows how many years working hard and spending all money on something she doesn't even enjoy any more? If the horse was young and healthy it would be a different scenario, but there is nothing wrong with pts an ederly arthritic horse because you want/need your life to move on.

Pts is alleviating any suffering or prospect of suffering.

 

[Parisexx]

Touchstone exactly x

 

[Angus' yard]

Do you have support from the people on your yard? Or horsey friends who can support you with this decision?