Yard Dilema

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waterfront

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My 17 yr old daughter recently bought a new forest youngster. Prior to this she had no experience of horses. I used to have a horse & worked with them for 10 years. Pony is coming on well, lunging nicely & going out for short hacks confidently, but does have his moments as youngsters will. A friend who helps us with him is leaving our present yard & opening her own livery buisness which will have good grazing & facilities but present yard is 15 mins drive away & 45 mins by public transport & new yard is a 35 min drive away. She has offered us a place on the livery yard & I'm confident it will be well run, but daughter doesn't want to go. I have also been offered some work at the new yard. I am the main carer for pony as I drive so go up twice daily, daughter often comes with me PM but can't always as she has a part time job. I'm not impressed with the present yard, poor grazing & iffy fences and no real managegment to name but a few reasons. There is also a lot of building work going on there & to get to our field you have to negotiate the diggers, lorriies and other obstacles & the schooling area is unusable at present due to its close proximity to the building work. Bearing in mind that if I won't be around so much to help out & daughters lack of experience, do you think I'm being unreasonable in wanting to move pony to new yard? Thanks to all who got through this long post. I would appreciate your thoughs on this matter as it's sometimes hard to look at these things dispassionately. Daughter has recently started paying for ponies livery after some prompting from me & I pay for hay and straw. I realise he's her pony when all's said & done but just want the best for him, so opinions needed PLEASE!
 
35min is a lot especially if she's already struggling with time.
Is there not an alternative to both? If he is her pony she has the right to keep him wherever she wants so it's not really a dilemna.
 
Just wonder if your daughter has to take complete responsibility for the pony, care and costs (well as much as possible if she's still a student.), she'll see him more as her own.
I only say this because family cob was once eldest daughters horse before boys and exams. Then middle daughters.. then youngest daughters...now he is just mine. I was always there looking after my own horses, and advising and helping them. Other liveries always spoke to me about him rather than daughter(s). They never really had the responsibilty for him, knew I was there.Made it easier for them to walk away when life took over knowing he'd be fine.
By moving the pony away so far, it will make more difficult for her to see him independently, pony will continue to know you better than her. Let her make the decisions as much as possible, allow her to make some mistakes-and just offer support when needed.
Ideally, help her hunt for better livery closer to home, not further away.
 
If you're the main carer then I think you have every right to exert some influence. Why exactly did your daughter buy the youngster? You say it's her first pony, and that you had to put some pressure on her to contribute to his keep. She does not sound totally dedicated, and as not a driver is going to be heavily reliant on you for support both now and in the future. And then along will come uni/jobs/boys etc.

But I do think 35 minutes' drive is a long way to go twice a day. Especially in winter.
I too think you should try to find another place for the pony that's nearer your home. My liveries drop away like melted butter when the weather gets bad and nobody's more than 20 minutes away!
 
thanks for your input, daughter just went ahead & bought him in spite of my suggesting she'd be better off with an older pony or horse that had more experience. I'm enjoying helping to look after him & bringing him on, b ut maybe it's time to step back & let her get on with it& see how they both fare. I daresay she'll be quick enough to ask if problems ocur & I'll keep an eye from a distance & a lookout for alternative livery that's better run, should she change her mind or run into problems
 
waterfront said:
thanks for your input, daughter just went ahead & bought him in spite of my suggesting she'd be better off with an older pony or horse that had more experience. I'm enjoying helping to look after him & bringing him on, b ut maybe it's time to step back & let her get on with it& see how they both fare. I daresay she'll be quick enough to ask if problems ocur & I'll keep an eye from a distance & a lookout for alternative livery that's better run, should she change her mind or run into problems
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This!

Let her do him herself - she probably doesn't realise how much you actually do for her until she has to do everything herself. Other people fit looking after horses around a full time job, let alone a part time one. You'll have lots of others to look after with your new job!
 
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