You know you're a horsey person when...

When you have a really good picture of your horse set up as your desktop background and instead of doing anything on the PC, you sit and look at it.......................................everytime.:o
 
...when you bite your fingernails and it doesn't bother you that they taste of horse-manure because you've been caught like that so many times before that you know you won't catch anything nasty.
 
...when your OH complains one night of a pus-filled lump on his elbow and you offer to apply a hot animalintex poultice with vetwrap to keep it in place overnight.

(THIS IS A TRUE STORY. HAPPENED LAST WEEK. OH now on antibiots from doc as poultice brought the elbow to a throbbing head that kept him awake all night!).
 
When you end up wiping off your jodh boots and wearing them on a night out, because they're your only shoes that aren't falling to bits...
 
This will sound like a lie... but the first time I drove our quad I kept trying to slow down be squeezing my thighs, OH was shouting that the brake was on the handles. I could not get the hang of it at all!

Oh no ive done that. I was 17 at my first proper horsey job and after being shown roughly how to drive the little tractor I poo picked and headed for the muck heap. Bearing in mind I didn't drive at all at this point this was a real novelty "driving" a vehicle. Til I realised I couldn't stop....then remembered I couldn't just pull it up! I was pulling back for all I was worth on the steering wheel....duh!
 
My friends don't bother asking for a lift now as they have to share the car with stuff covered in horse hair.

Although the various whips and spurs and bits of tack cause GREAT excitement in some friends....
 
When your idea of dressing up is wearing clean jeans.

Or when you conpare your spotlessly clean hands to a non horsey person's.

Likewise with the car!
 
...one i did recenty....:

When you put factor 50 sun screen on your 'pink nosed' stablemate so they don't get burnt.........but forget to bloody well do yourself!!...and DO get sunburnt! LOL.

Jeeeezz... i ask ya..!!
 
When the highlight of your day is that your horse managed, for the first time ever, to trot AND poo at the same time during a lesson...
 
I have had conversations about having to give her a good whack with a whip on her bum... got strange looks!

when you struggle to justify spending £20 on a new pair of shoes for work, but spend £120 every 6 weeks for your horses to have 2 new pairs each!

you obsessively check the weather to see what rugs are needed and when is the best time to ride
 
You take off your bra and a shower of hay falls to the ground

This and worst case senario you go to the loo after filling 30-40 haynets and find hay in your knickers! :eek:

This but with straw (I'm a very hands on mucker outer-er-er-er:p).

Also:

When you're hand-stirring your horse's feed and let him lick your hands afterwards, didn't seem weird or gross until I thought about what my friends' reaction would be if I told them!

When you hear a romantic love song you immediately relate it to you and your horse

When you move around the house like a horse (extended trot is especially amusing!)

When you're on a walk on holiday and all you can think of is how the ground is perfect for a canter/gallop

When your friend asks you "Do you talk to your horse?" and you don't even know what to say because it's like asking "Do you talk to your baby?" (aside from the general commands, I have in-depth conversations with Jock when out on a hack, and he has a way of blowing out his nostrils just at the right moments:D)

You pick up on the word 'horse' across a noisy room better than you do your own name!

You still run to the window when you hear the sound of hooves on tarmac outside

You're in your car driving past fields with horses in, criticising people's rug choices...:o
 
You ride your bike down the road and when you stop at a set of traffic lights go to pat :D

A friend did that on the way to work!
 
Every inch of your body hurts or you have flu and all you do is dose up with painkillers/ day nurse and get out there and make sure the horse is seen to.

Or when you're far to ill to even think about considering going to work but you still go and muck out three boxes.

...when your OH complains one night of a pus-filled lump on his elbow and you offer to apply a hot animalintex poultice with vetwrap to keep it in place overnight.

(THIS IS A TRUE STORY. HAPPENED LAST WEEK. OH now on antibiots from doc as poultice brought the elbow to a throbbing head that kept him awake all night!).

He obviously needed another poultice to 'pop' it :eek::D
 
When you blow your nose and what is left on the tissue is black.

When you pass wind at home and it smells like the muck heap.

When you go to spend time in the city and get all excited on the way home at the any faint farmy smell.

When you budget your spare income in the currency of hay, feed, shoes etc.

When you think nothing of lusting after a pair of expensive leather gaitors or yard boots, but won't buy work/casual shoes for any more than £20 a pair.

When you convince yourself that perfectly good apples or carrots have gone over so you can take them for the horses.

When you promise yourself every time you buy a new pair of jeans that you will never wear them on the yard, but two weeks later they are your yard favourites.

When you realise you don't have a linen thief in the house, you've just taken a other tea towel up the yard every time you have needed a cloth.

When you injure yourself at home, but have to go to the yard to get cotton wool and dress your wounds with Animalintex.

When baby oil is for manes and tails....not your own skin.

When you can spend an entire day searching horses for sale ads despite not wanting to buy a new horse.

When you have ski pants...but have never been skiing (bad weather only)



I could go on all night :mad:
 
When you have to explain to non horsey friends that no my horsey friend and I have not made up a new language we are just talking about the finer point of gag bits action:o
 
Better late than never

When you stop mid sentence during an oral (language) exam because you saw a horse outside.

When all your jeans are a little dirtier from the knees up because you spent so much time in jellies and jeans/boots that the top half of the jeans gets stained with things like lyx and hoof oil.

When everything can be solved with something from the tack room.

When you're in the car (and driving) and you see a horsebox passing, your head whips round automatically as you try and identify the box/horse/driver and then spent the rest of the journey listing out every single competition on that day in the general area they're headed.
 
When you see a pile of horse manure in a city street and exclaim in excitement

When you can't go out for a walk with your OH because it is too hot / raining / too cold but dont even notice the weather when on your horse

when your horse has 18 clean numnahs but you have to get the least-worst shirt out of the laundry bin to wear again
 
your sister offers to take you on a free night out because when she came to visit you spend the whole 2 hours talking about horses and thats sad lol x
 
Top