you know you're spending too much time with horses when...

L

LeneHorse

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- You tell the garage man the puncture is in the off hind
- you put 'scouring' on your sick form at work
- when being jostled in a queue you poke the person in the ribs and say 'over'
- you pat your OH and say 'good boy' when he behaves

can anyone think of any others?
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-you half halt your car when you see a lorry coming
-you hold your breath when driving past a plastic bag in the hedge in case your car spooks
-when your wheel tracking's out you tell the mechanic that your car is leaning on the right rein...

(or does this mean I'm spending too much time in my car?!)
 
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-you half halt your car when you see a lorry coming
-you hold your breath when driving past a plastic bag in the hedge in case your car spooks
-when your wheel tracking's out you tell the mechanic that your car is leaning on the right rein...

(or does this mean I'm spending too much time in my car?!)

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omg that is so funny
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thats brill
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gripping the stearing wheel in a "squeezing the water out of a sponge" motion to try to slow down, instead of applying the foot brake.
 
PMSL best yet
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I went to the garage to have my front tyres sorted and told the guy that the OF was the most worn
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.... and when one of the 'girls' at work asks me how my horses are, I sometimes go into horse speak and their eyes glaze over
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When you take forward seat when driving over a speed bump...
S

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Pmsl!!!
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What happens when ya dont hit them square on???
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LOL!!
 
[ QUOTE ]
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When you take forward seat when driving over a speed bump...
S

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Pmsl!!!
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What happens when ya dont hit them square on???
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LOL!!

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But I always arrive on the ride stride, with the hind tyres engaged....oh dear...sometimes I even click...
S
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It is worse for us carriage drivers, we speak to our horses more than riders...

I am guilty of...

Telling my kids "and woah and stand!" when about to cross a road. Followed by "walk on"

You know you are spending too much time with horses when ...

You have more leather in your house than Miss Whiplash.

You spend more money on horse shoes than your own shoes.

Your idea of dressing up for a night out is finding some trousers without c*ap all over them.

You have so much mud in your car that you could claim it as setaside and recieve a subsidy.
 
- you say "whoooooaaahhh" to your car when braking
- you lean forward when your car goes up hills, and backwards when going down hills
- you car contains 3 pairs of boots, a saddle, a bridle, a hat, various hi-viz items, 5 coats (one for every possible weather eventuality), 3 whips, spare reins, a spare bit, a pair of waterproof trousers, at least 20 random gloves, 2 numnahs and a pot of sudocrem (just in case of mudfever/injuries and because it might freeze in the tack room)
- the words "gag" and "whip" only have totally innocent meanings to you
- somebody tries to start a conversation with you about a scientific breakthrough where someone is inventing fabric that repairs itself - you glaze over day dreaming off self-repairing rugs
- if someone mentions that the weather is a bit cold you proceed to inform them what weight rug your horse wearing today
- when choosing a new coat to buy yourself, you define them at Lightweight, Mediumweight and Heavyweight and enquire as to how many grams of polyfill the coats have
- going to sainsbury's in your jods is almost a daily occurence
 
- you panic when you see a milk lorry coming in the distance as you drive to work

- you tell your OH to walk on

- you ask OH if it's he's turned the guinea pigs out
 
You say 'my car failed the vet' instead of 'my car failed its MOT'

You adopt the jumping position when using public toilets.

keep 'em coming!
 
Milk lorry - oh no!

I turn the dog out.

My car nearly failed its MOT as it smells so much - can they fail it on that? What a fussy mechanic.
 
[ QUOTE ]
When you take forward seat when driving over a speed bump...
S

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Actually I found that this does help ease the jarring with the bigger speed bumps.

I certainly do it on the bike when going over them. Maybe saying "Good Boy!" and patting the side of the top tube is going a little far though...
 
When you assume that everyone uses the drawer handles on the kitchen dresser as a hook for bridles. (I've been told that not all kitchens have bridles in them!)
 
When I took mine to the garage...the mechanics started to get the plastic covers ready for the seats

'Oh, no need for that' I said helpfully.

'It's to protect our overalls...' said the mechanics.

S
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