36 Million want to join us country bumpkins....

[severnmiles]

Am I the only one that this terrifies? Gees, there are enough city people and townies living in the countryside as it is. I don't mind living next door to townies aslong as they don't try to change the countryside and they accept it and the way of life as it is. When in Rome.....

 

[spaniel]

Maybe we will be able to get a parking space at Waitrose then.

As far as Im concerned they all need passports and all passports should be issued by me!

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

They can piss off! I'll take the subsidies they pay for but not their repulsive selves!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

Subsidies are meant to maintain the food producing capacity of the land and stop it from becoming suburbia.

Where does the 36 Million figure come from?

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

I couldn't give a [****] about suburbia as long as I get the green-backs! Our cows earn us £1.50 a day in subsidies. My wife wasn't best pleased when I said her mother should apply!!!

 

[Onyxia]

I couldn't give a [****] about suburbia
....................................................................

Lucky suburbia cares about the country then isnt it?
Without the "repulsive townies" there would be no subsidies.
Respect works both ways you know.

 

[Ereiam_jh]

£1.50 a cow!

That's peanut's!

Lift the planning restrictions on my land and 100 acres is worth £45,000,000 rather than £200,000.

Let me build a nice load of houses on my land, [****] the hedges and fields. Don't eat the view, [****] it!

I'll take the dosh and I'll be on my way, no complaints.

There's a damn site more money to be made farming townies than a few manky freisians.

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

Brilliant reply, AA! I can see why the number of your disciples is growing exponentially on a daily basis! F*** the ban!!!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

Yes you do seem to be a bit behind the times Tony old boy.

Get with New Labour my man! F££$% the countryside, concrete's where the dosh is not cows.

Those townies make me more cash that a few measly subsidies from Europe.

 

[combat_claire]

Antonius is just a spoof, don't let him irritate you.

The trouble is rural is more than just a postcode. You can be more rural and live on the edge of the city than the lad in the village that dreams of the urban jungle and dresses like a chav! It is for me more of an attitude to the way of life.

I have lived on the edge of Peterborough for 23 years, in one direction I look onto a major Fitz covert, the other is a suburban township street! I will shortly be moving into a Fenland market town..which is hardly a rural paradise. Yet I have farmed for a year, I've helped in kennels, I've hunted, I've handled a shot gun and if I think about it I can just about drive a tractor...I'm pro-hunting, pro-freedoms and think I have an understanding of the way the countryside fits together. I consider myself as rural as our local butcher who lives and farms in the nearby village.

However like him I despise those who have moved into the pretty village, with no understanding of why we do things the way we do, they complain about the smells of cultivating in [****], they moan about the dust from the combines, and the slow tractors on the roads. They race round the lanes like they are at Brands Hatch with no regard for what they might meet. They are never seen in the pub, they never shop in the local stores and wouldn't be seen dead at village events. They contribute nothing to the countryside and nothing to the community. They might have a rural postcode, green wellies and a shiny barbour, but they will never be truly rural:

My master summed it up much better in song:

They want to escape the cities
from their mobile phones and faxes.
the right to roam the countryside
total public access
They force us to live on subsidies
then think they can do just what they please
because they pay their taxes.


When?
When are you going to see?
That you’ve let yourself, get too close,
To Walt Disney?

They want a rural theme park
kept all spick and span
sanitised and deodorised
fit for urban man
and if that doesn’t suit the locals
well, we’re just a bunch of yokels
so they needn’t give a damn

They buy themselves a house
out in the countryside
then decide the way its run
must be for them to decide
they spend a few years suing
the cattle for their mooing,
then complain the “community spirit” has all died.

When?
When are you going to see?
That you’ve let yourself, get too close,
To Walt Disney?

We are glad they like the countryside
we want them to enjoy it
but they need some understanding
and to learn how to employ it.
because changing the way the country’s run
without knowing why these things are done
surely will destroy it!

When?
When are you going to see?
That you’ve let yourself, get too close,
To Walt Disney?

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

You're brilliant! If the Hunting Act is the problem, you are surely the answer!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

Claire, I know I take the piss a lot of the time but you are spot on.

I know exactly what you mean about brands hatch, after cowering in the back of my brother in law's Merc, winging our way round the lanes. "But he's a good driver" says his wife.

 

[combat_claire]

For more of the lyrics please visit:

http://www.lisnavagh.com/music/lyrics.html#Mark Thomas, don't forget to vote in the hunting poll on the main page!

 

[Onyxia]

Another troll?????*rolls eyes*

That song is very good, love the "rural theme park " bit- too true!The people it descirbes are not wanted anywhere TBH, they moan about the city then moan about the country, they must just enjoy being misable.
I LOVE the country, really love it and would be there now( up to my neck in sh1t enjoying the smells and sounds) if I diddnt have to be in town for OHs health reasons.

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

That song literally brought a tear to my eye.

One of the most scurrilous rumours put out by the foul antis in recent years is that a farmer in Yorkshire started the Foot and Mouth crisis, when we ALL know it was lefty, socialist, townies infecting the countryside with their filth!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

Actually it's not really about town verses country, it's about freedom verses slavery. There are those who want us to obey and cow tow to every stupid regulation. No one should have to obey ridiculous laws.

 

[combat_claire]

Aww thanks. I put my heart and soul into that..a bit of a touchy subject the cars racing...someone nearly killed our huntsman and his hounds the other morning, but ended up ruining 30 foot of decent hedgerow before they hit a tree!

It was a bit hard to put my feelings into words. I await the scathing response from Karl....

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

Well said, AA! As a libertarian I choose which laws to obey. I therefore drink-drive, routinely ignore the speed limit, pollute the river with pesticides, beat the wife up and hire and fire immigrant labour at will. It's called freedom and it's what we won WW2 for!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

"lefty, socialist, townies "

Bring em on!

What did you do for the miners?

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

Oh don't mind miners as long as they know their place. When they start on about riding to hounds when they can't even ride I'm afraid I lose patience.

 

[combat_claire]

Haven't we met somewhere before?

 

[Ereiam_jh]

The difference is that if you disobey any of those laws then you will be prosecuted. I publicly disobey the Hunting Act and I will not be prosecuted for it. That is because it is a deeply absurd law. I fully support your right to civil disobedience as long as you are prepared to take the consequences, in your case, prosecution, in my case none.

I regularily and openly search for , flush out and chase deer with my dogs. The police know exactly what I do. They let me get away with it.

Do your drinking and driving if you like, but do it openly and see how far you get.

Would you like to come and watch me brwak the Hunting Act? There is nothing you can do to stop me. That is because I am above it. Or rather, it is beneath me.

 

[Maesfen]

No scathing response from me, it was brilliant!

Bit like that other song, well the main line anyway -

"when will they ever learn, when will they ever learn?"

 

[Onyxia]

Bit like that other song, well the main line anyway -

"when will they ever learn, when will they ever learn?"
.......................................................................................................
When they ask questions and make an effort to understand.
Yes, I know, no hope for most.

 

[Ereiam_jh]

Your facade was slipping a little there Tony.

Actually I've just bought my self a horse so I can learn to ride to my hounds as well as hunting on foot.

Wish me luck, you might as well, there's nothing you could do to stop me with such an incompetant law.

I'm off breaking the Hunting Act this next weekend. Do you want to come?

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

I've publicly flouted laws all my life. As a libertarian I believe people should be free to drink and drive. If they crash or injure someone - ok, punish them. But if you get away with it what's the problem? I am SICK AND TIRED of endless pointless stupid regulations drawn up by thick lefty busybodies with nothing better to do than take away MY freedoms which MY father fought for in WW2. It makes me apoplectic with rage.

If you break the law and get away with it, all power to you!!!

 

[combat_claire]

Glad you liked the songs. I think the album is still available on Amazon, sounds even better when it is sung!

If there are degrees of rurality in one's understanding of the countryside...then I think I am about 350 degrees, for the life of me I can't get the hang of backing a grain trailer...what is all this about turn left, if you want it to go right..whats that all about???

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

My dear fellow, I wasn't referring to you! I admire you enormously. If you look at history all true geniuses were initially considered weirdo misfits.

 

[Antoninus_Pluck]

"for the life of me I can't get the hang of backing a grain trailer"

Call me old-fashioned but vehicles and ladies don't mix!

 

[Ereiam_jh]

If you drink and drive let me know and I will get you prosecuted. I don't agree with your right to drink and drive and the police will back me up. Drinking and driving ruins lives.

It's slightly different as I am sure you realise with the Hunting Act. You know that I break the Hunting Act but you are powerless to get me prosecuted. I am not cruel to animals.