Advice Please from Parents with Kids Competing re yard...

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showpony

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Head is wrecked... So as some as you know Mini got new competition npony a while back & all is going great.... Mini's first love is jumping so ultimate plan is to get them out doing registered jumping & hopefully competing at Workers @ Dublin next year...( Mini is very goey and apparently is going to aim for Olympics post Rio lol )
Here is the Dilema... Pony currently on livery at a Riding school... Mini is part of furniture there and loves it but she is only one that owns a pony there.. Its crucial that she does group lessons to keep her riding with other children but tbh the children she would ride with are once a week riders... She also has couple of private lessons with her coach as well as riding with me...

So have found a yard a bit of a trek away well about 45 min drive that Mini is going to take pony to for a residential camp over half term that specialises in bringing on children that want to compete - kids from all over Europe will be doing same camp so its a pretty established training facility.. In fact we are going to take mini for a lesson on Sunday where she will get to ride with a group of children her OWN age that are equally capable & competitive for the first time ever!!!

So Im musing re moving Mini & Pony to livery at this yard.... they are really experienced in bringing children up through the ranks in the SJ & eventing circuit ... Lots of specific coaching, etc.... Minis current coach is brilliant & would still be involved BUT it would mean during Winter months Minis riding would be cut down to 3 times a week plus 1 show...

Thoughts please, my head is melted!!!!
 
i'd do it. It sounds like mini will get a chance to flourish, and you might regret not doing it. It could give her a chance to achieve her full potential, and you can always move back to old yard if it's too much. Riding 3 times + 1 in winter sounds reasonable, as well and would give a natural break a bit during the year.

I'd take her and see how she likes it. Sometimes kids find it easier and are more confident as a big fish in a small pond, and can have a confidence wobble if changed to a playing field where they have to find their feet with kids that are better than them. So i'd be wary there might be a chance of that happening. I'd see how the half term camp goes and make a call on it then.
 
I would wait for now, getting a range of riding opportunities, good coaching, hacking, group lessons even at a lower level will all benefit her in the long run, maybe go for some special training as you are and see what happens next spring when it may be a better time to consider a move.

The other option would be to go there in the summer and move back each winter, it could be the best compromise, maybe you could do the same with your horse so there is less traveling around.
 
I don't know how old mini is? A yard 45mins away is a long way especially after a day at school. Is she in the Pony club? That would probably be my first port of call, she could stay at the yard she is at and get some training from the PC alongside her regular routine.
Remember it is supposed to be fun.
 
Mini is nearly 8. Before u shoot me down I am.not a pushy parent at all. Pc has pretty much finished until spring.
I'm all about them having fun but mini just wants 2 go and compete!



jrp204 said:
I don't know how old mini is? A yard 45mins away is a long way especially after a day at school. Is she in the Pony club? That would probably be my first port of call, she could stay at the yard she is at and get some training from the PC alongside her regular routine.
Remember it is supposed to be fun.
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[thanks. I agree) QUOTE=cinnamontoast;12646335]Move to where there are other kids her age. It's frustrating for her to have no similarly aged little ones round her.[/QUOTE]
 
Are there no other livery yards inbetween? In all senses of the word inbetween. Somewhere that would have other kids with their own ponies, somewhere with other PC members? The competition yard sounds a bit OTT IMO for a young child and would probably turn you into that pushy mother and almost make her miss some of the fun. Does she need so much training? She's a nice little rider and the pony is wonderful, I'd personally want them to have fun and find their own way for a year or so.
 
showpony said:
Mini is nearly 8. Before u shoot me down I am.not a pushy parent at all. Pc has pretty much finished until spring.
I'm all about them having fun but mini just wants 2 go and compete!
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Fair enough, our PC used to have a regular sessions through the winter, it's a shame they don't all do it. Could you trailer her over to the other yard for training once a week at least through the winter to see how she gets on? I wasn't saying you were a pushy parent, my daughter sounds very similar to yours and we gave her as many opportunities as we could. I asked her when she was about 14 if I was a pushy parent and she laughed at me!
I do think another valuable lesson is how to lose graciously, there are too many kids, and parents who haven't mastered that one.
 
Honey08 said:
Are there no other livery yards inbetween? In all senses of the word inbetween. Somewhere that would have other kids with their own ponies, somewhere with other PC members? The competition yard sounds a bit OTT IMO for a young child and would probably turn you into that pushy mother and almost make her miss some of the fun. Does she need so much training? She's a nice little rider and the pony is wonderful, I'd personally want them to have fun and find their own way for a year or so.
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^ Completely agree with this.
 
I'm with Honey08 on this one...much as she and the pony are both very talented, she is only 7...there's all the time in the world to get competitive and such a relatively short window of fun to miss out on. My mini is now 14 and fiercely focused on improving both herself and her pony and on reflection I'm so glad that we backed off the compulsion to ride so much at that age, as a result she had a lot of fun and is now as keen as mustard. She may have been put off with too much training then but can't get enough of it now. But at the end of the day everyone is different and it has to be what both you and mini want!
 
Agree with Honey08's suggestion of finding a nearer yard with children the same age - you can always box over to the competition yard for lessons if you feel it is necessary so you would still have access to the training, but I think a more general yard might be a healthier atmosphere for a child of that age. Plus you won't be committed to long travel times.
 
Having gone through a similar situation with my daughter I wouldn't be moving to a yard 45 minutes away, it's too far for a 7 year old. We were fortunate to be able to have pony at home, so she could ride pretty much every day if she wanted to. She was a member of our local PC and got to do rallies and camp + be in teams. I was happy to take her to lessons with excellent trainers for dressage and jumping as and when she needed them. It also meant, we got try a few and stick with people she really got on with. She also joined BYRDs. I kept my eye out for training camps and she did a couple through BS and when she was older and accepted on the FEI pony training squad she had access to lots of excellent training. If you are not careful it can all become a bit of a "hot house" and frankly many of the mothers of capable children were a complete pain in the but and many were prepared to spend £Ks to get the right pony. Daughter was very glad to do PC, hack with friends and have the occasional day hunting with "normal" kids. Personally I'd steer well clear of a "competition" yard.
 
I think if she goes for a lesson every week-end you get the best of both worlds and time to relax on school days.
She could have for example lesson on the Saturday, show on Sunday and hack out/flat work during the week.
 
45 mins is a long way, I woudn't want to do it and I'm not 7/8, I'd get well fed up!

I'd stay where you are if nowhere else suitable and make the most of having transport to go to other places for training etc as well as comps for the time being. Are there any other PCs that do more through winter?
 
My 7 yr old has lessons once a week at a yard 40mins from home (she is by no means at the level of your Mini). She loves her instructor there and is gaining so much confidence but the main reason we chose there is because its only 5 mins from the yard where my horse is stabled. My horse is only 5 mins from work so I only have to do the long drive on the weekends. I wouldn't like to have to face that journey for her lessons more frequently and especially after school on winter evenings which is why we have put off getting her a pony.

I love reading about Mini's progress. She has many years ahead to get competitive and you will find once she hits the 12 mark, there will be many girls with their own ponies and as competitive in yards closer to home. As others have said, maybe a weekly coaching session at the competition yard will be good for now? She could work on what she has done back at her own yard in between. It's a tough one though so best of luck with the decision.
 
Thank you all for your advice & opinions!! Hand on heart think I was getting slightly carried away - I really don't want her to have too much pressure on her & as many of you have said you really can't get back those early years of fun & Id hate to regret things in years to come.. So think best thing for Mini is just to keep her at yard she is currently at - let her enjoy the pony, get out hunting & hunter trialling over the winter & maybe box up to competition yard maybe once or twice a month..:)

In an ideal world would love there to be a gang of kids her age at current yard that are as " Into" horses as much as Mini is but I suspect that the older she gets we will have more options..so will just let her kick on & she will have to put up with riding with Mum for the forseeable future:)
 
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Just make sure she is with other kids then its not a problem, moved my lot to a yard with adults and teenagers, she was eleven and she very quickly lost interest as kids have fun together. She wont mind the journey as she will have phone book etc, its just going to up your driving time but that's being a mum for you!!
 
I would stay where you are, my friend has a very talented daughter who when very young announced that she wanted to do the pony squads, she has been picked on and victmised for it since, she was minis age when she decided this, but it appears young children are not allowed dreams and if they announce them to young they will be hassled by it forever. My friends daughter has a pony that she has brought on from a 4 year old and being on a competitive livery yard again has caused much jealousy and angst.
She was asked the other day to teach a 12.2 changes and the owners little girl would love a pony that could do them, this child that wants the pony to do them is 7!
Where has all the fun gone out of horse riding, don't lose sight of it or else it becomes a real chore
 
cinnamontoast said:
Move to where there are other kids her age. It's frustrating for her to have no similarly aged little ones round her.
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This. 45 minutes is a long way for a 7 year old, after they've had a day at school and done various other activities. It's also a long way for you to drive too! I think at that kind of age, she'd may appreciate having other 7 year olds with their own ponies that she can ride with on a fun basis who she can maybe have lessons with, with an instructor and then go to shows with. I would say it might be worth looking at a few others yards which are in between before you commit to this particular one. She's very lucky to have such a commited Mum :)
 
I do think it would be good if she can still have fun/do the silly/daft pony stuff with her friends at current yard but get out and do the more serious stuff/have her coaching too and see how things go.
 
oldie48 said:
Having gone through a similar situation with my daughter I wouldn't be moving to a yard 45 minutes away, it's too far for a 7 year old. We were fortunate to be able to have pony at home, so she could ride pretty much every day if she wanted to. She was a member of our local PC and got to do rallies and camp + be in teams. I was happy to take her to lessons with excellent trainers for dressage and jumping as and when she needed them. It also meant, we got try a few and stick with people she really got on with. She also joined BYRDs. I kept my eye out for training camps and she did a couple through BS and when she was older and accepted on the FEI pony training squad she had access to lots of excellent training. If you are not careful it can all become a bit of a "hot house" and frankly many of the mothers of capable children were a complete pain in the but and many were prepared to spend £Ks to get the right pony. Daughter was very glad to do PC, hack with friends and have the occasional day hunting with "normal" kids. Personally I'd steer well clear of a "competition" yard.
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^^^^^^^^^^ this and thrice this

Our PC is busy over the winter with indoor jumping rallies and lots of training. I'd keep her where its fun and add in one to ones with specialist trainers in the holidays. I have a very keen 8 year old (although nowhere near as competitive as yours) and tbh hunting keeps her quiet over the winter!
 
I have an 8 year old who has spent the last year being fast-tracked with a combination of higher-level or specialist lessons, time with me and time in a lower-level "normal" riding lesson with kids closer to her own age. She has loved all of it but it strikes me how much she really looks forward to the "normal" riding lesson, where everything is comparatively easy for her so she can relax and enjoy being part of the group instead of working so hard all the time.

Each kid is different and you know yours best but my big learning from this last year is that, even though my daughter is ambitious, dedicated, courageous and thrilled to be doing all that she is doing, she is only 8 and to use her own words “sometimes just wants to do kid stuff”. That includes hanging out with the other non-pony-owning friends, prettifying the pony and discussing their pony-dreams without any competition or pressure.

Ultimately your decision should probably revolve around whether it is going to remain a pleasure going to whichever stables you choose and a lot of that will depend on the atmosphere and the attitude of the other children/parents.

Good luck!
 
TBH I would wait but take her over there once a fortnight for lessons and see how it goes .
I think it will be too much , by that I mean the hour and half travelling,for a child of that age .
Better have her keen and wanting more than tired and cranky .
 
showpony said:
Thank you all for your advice & opinions!! Hand on heart think I was getting slightly carried away - I really don't want her to have too much pressure on her & as many of you have said you really can't get back those early years of fun & Id hate to regret things in years to come.. So think best thing for Mini is just to keep her at yard she is currently at - let her enjoy the pony, get out hunting & hunter trialling over the winter & maybe box up to competition yard maybe once or twice a month..:)

In an ideal world would love there to be a gang of kids her age at current yard that are as " Into" horses as much as Mini is but I suspect that the older she gets we will have more options..so will just let her kick on & she will have to put up with riding with Mum for the forseeable future:)
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I just wanted to say that you sound like a lovely mum. It's really nice to see that you're willing to listen to other people's opinions and that you only have your daughter's best interests at heart :)
 
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