Annoyed with YO - reason enough to leave?

Serephin

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Just wondering really, after another run in with mostly absent YO, is being fed up and annoyed with YO enough reason to leave if the yard is generally okay?

She blatantly resents having to run her yard. Begrudges having to do anything for anyone and favours some liveries over others, so the rules don't really hold much weight, as they apply to some and not others. Is never around to enforce rules anyway, and her form of communication is notes on the board to humiliate the perpetrator or notes left personally.

I enjoy the yard for the most part. But this altercation today (she made SUCH a drama out of nothing) is making me wonder why I am spending my hard earned money somewhere I am not appreciated as a customer. She also covets my horse, and I am fairly sure she feeds him hay at times (he is a good doer) but that could be my suspicious mind!

So, is not liking the YO as a person enough to warrant leaving a yard where I am settled, my horse is settled and most of the time it is okay?

Thanks in advance for any advice - glass of wine for everyone!
 

Serephin

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Well, there is a yard closer to home, where I have been before. They run it more like a business, are no nonsense, but treat people with happy smiles and respect. I can speak to them far more easily and feel more at ease.

Both yards are much of a muchness with regards to facilities. Although, yard closer to home has huge farm rides (compared to my yard) and we can take dogs up. Current yard used to be assisted DIY but not any more, so liveries are charging each other to do winter work. Yard closer to home do a bit of assisted DIY, but not officially.

One of my friends is there, she left my current yard due to being treated appallingly by YO.

Dunno. I run a business of my own, and it drives me a bit nuts to be in this kind of environment. If I treated my clients this way, we would go bust! She offends my business sense! Lol.
 

Achinghips

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LEAVE!!!!

The YO sets the culture of the entire Yard. It will get worse. Go where you are wanted and appreciated. I don't do resentful diva's, and you can't win against one who also has the priveledge of setting the rules, due to the power imbalance in your relationship.

It's a client market. Plenty of Yards elsewhere would be happy for your money.
 

soulfull

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Just wondering why you left the other yard. I would think about that reason and really dig deep and remember what it was truly like, just in case
To be honest most yards I have been at either the yard owner or the yard busy body have drove me nuts sometimes therefore personally I wouldn't leave a yard just because of that. Human nature dictates someone will drive you mad. If she is mostly absent does it matter??
 

Serephin

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Just wondering why you left the other yard. I would think about that reason and really dig deep and remember what it was truly like, just in case
To be honest most yards I have been at either the yard owner or the yard busy body have drove me nuts sometimes therefore personally I wouldn't leave a yard just because of that. Human nature dictates someone will drive you mad. If she is mostly absent does it matter??

Left the other yard as I had an unsuitable horse and sent it to my friend to sell. So was horseless. Kept stable for a month whilst deciding what to do but decided to have a break for a while, which turned into a year.

Had no intention of ever going back to current yard, having left it for the one closer to home due to crappy grazing and crappy hacking. YO wasn't so bad back then, she wasn't a factor.

But circumstances meant I ended up back there with new horse at a moments notice, so she can be very accommodating in that respect, and I appreciate that. Hacking has got slightly better over the years due to us being allowed to go on another farmer's land, but only on certain months of the year. And grazing is better in that I managed to get my boy into a decent paddock after years of crappy ones. So my patience has rewarded me so far. Not sure how much patience I have left though. But I don't want to cut my nose of to spite my face, hence the pondering!
 

HoneyB24

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I understand where you are coming from. I have also left a yard, mainly because of the Yard owners. Although the problem was that they were there constantly and we had emails every week telling us off for all sorts of minor things (they were control freaks basically). They were nicer to liveries that were on part or full livery than those who were on DIY (because they wanted the money more than anything else). They didn't and still don't treat people like customers, i have always said they want the horses and money but not the owners! After have 16 liveries, they now only have 4! (would ring alarm bells you would think)

This wasn't the only reason i left, the environment didn't suit my horse as i was stressed as i was bullied by the yard owners.Since leaving, me and my horse get on much better and are much happier. I spend pretty much all of Saturday and Sunday down the yard now.

It is a difficult decision, but if you are not happy then maybe wise to move? We work hard for our horses and should be able to enjoy the time with them. I hope you find a way to solve this :)
 

Spit That Out

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I would look at moving as horses are an expensive hobby and you need to be able to enjoy the time you spend with them. If your YO or any other reason your not happy at the yard then you need to move somewhere you are.
It might mean you have to drive a bit further, pay a bit more or cut down on the facilities you enjoy. However you could find the perfect yard round the corner and wish you had moved sooner!?!

There will always be something that peeves you off because unless you are fortunate enough to have your own place and have it the way you want it then there will always be. "that stupid rule" "that annoying person" "pants facilities" etc etc it's just if you can live with it or not?

You dont have to leave on bad terms. Don't burn your bridges just in case you have to go back. Find a yard, hand your notice, a bottle of wine and a box of chocs to the YO, don't bad mouth the yard to other liveries in case they say something to her and move on. Be the bigger person!
 

MiJodsR2BlinkinTite

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I'm a YO; and if someone wasn't happy for whatever reason and were considering leaving because of it, I'd like to have the chance to have a chat with them and see if the issues can be resolved.

However, if a livery IS truly unhappy and/or situation cannot be resolved - then personally I'd rather they leave than stay and grouse to everyone else on the yard about how awful the YO is etc etc.

Think OP should move if she is not happy and/or dissatisfied with her current set-up. But keep good air and don't go bitching about her previous yard in the new place.
 

horsesatemymoney

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It depends how unhappy you are and if you think that it will get better/worse or if you could speak to YO and explain how you're feeling...if not, or it's making you unhappy and is likely not to improve, I'd go to yard 1....horses are too expensive and life is too short to be unhappy when you're the customer!
 

Serephin

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Thanks everyone. I am going to mull it over and see how I feel about things in the cold light of day, so to speak.

I have never left a yard on bad terms, I believe in not burning bridges as well. I wouldn't slag her off to the new yard either (plenty of other people adding gossip to the horsey grape vine without my help!). I haven't mentioned this to anyone else at the yard, just a friend off the yard, so I am not going around spreading bad feeling either. When all is said and done, its down to personal feeling, other liveries may view her completely differently to me, but I do know some have their gripes.

Nowt so queer as folk and all that!
 
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Zoobie

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I was at a yard in Surrey that was run by a couple of nutters who were just awful. Would padlock horses into stables if there was a whiff of a livery leaving or block them in . I'm so happy where I am now the YO is fantastic I can't fault her . Nowt so queer as horsey folk including liveries . So I would move if I were you - there are some nice places out there that do genuinely look after your horses x
 

wallykissmas

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I'm a YO; and if someone wasn't happy for whatever reason and were considering leaving because of it, I'd like to have the chance to have a chat with them and see if the issues can be resolved.

However, if a livery IS truly unhappy and/or situation cannot be resolved - then personally I'd rather they leave than stay and grouse to everyone else on the yard about how awful the YO is etc etc.

Think OP should move if she is not happy and/or dissatisfied with her current set-up. But keep good air and don't go bitching about her previous yard in the new place.

I'm yet to find a yard owner like you would try resolve any issues instead of lose people. Most near me seem to have the attitude " if you don't like it leave " which is a rubbish situation !!
 

Nightmare before Christmas

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Just wondering really, after another run in with mostly absent YO, is being fed up and annoyed with YO enough reason to leave if the yard is generally okay?

She blatantly resents having to run her yard. Begrudges having to do anything for anyone and favours some liveries over others, so the rules don't really hold much weight, as they apply to some and not others. Is never around to enforce rules anyway, and her form of communication is notes on the board to humiliate the perpetrator or notes left personally.

I enjoy the yard for the most part. But this altercation today (she made SUCH a drama out of nothing) is making me wonder why I am spending my hard earned money somewhere I am not appreciated as a customer. She also covets my horse, and I am fairly sure she feeds him hay at times (he is a good doer) but that could be my suspicious mind!

So, is not liking the YO as a person enough to warrant leaving a yard where I am settled, my horse is settled and most of the time it is okay?

Thanks in advance for any advice - glass of wine for everyone!

are you were i think you are?
 

Toby_Zaphod

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So, is not liking the YO as a person enough to warrant leaving a yard where I am settled, my horse is settled and most of the time it is okay?

It doesn't matter if people believe this reasoning warrants leaving or not. If you are not happy at a yard then leave. The decision is yours. Owning a horse, looking after it & riding it is supposed to be a pleasure. If something detracts from that pleasure & you are able to do something about it then do it. ;)
 

Charlie Bucket

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OP - are you on the same yard as me?! :p

Sounds like a very similar scenario to where I livery. Highly annoying and quite often causes upsets, but it is very near my home, great grazing, horses are happy etc. School could be better but hey ho.

You just have to weigh up the pros and cons really.

Good luck, I know how you feel! :)
 

Enfys

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It doesn't matter if people believe this reasoning warrants leaving or not. If you are not happy at a yard then leave. The decision is yours. Owning a horse, looking after it & riding it is supposed to be a pleasure. If something detracts from that pleasure & you are able to do something about it then do it. ;)

Wise words indeed. I completely agree.

It swings both ways, as a YO I have been unfortunate enough to have had one set of absolutely ghastly owners - I found myself avoiding my own yard when they were around, and, even worse as far as I am concerned, my other Owners were avoiding them too:(

As an Owner I have also been uncomfortable and it really isn't the way to go on. Horses are too expensive a hobby to creep around in the shadows...find somewhere where you feel happy :)
 

popeyesno1fan

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I am a very small YO and have two liveries in at the moment. I have 8 acres, divided into 3 paddocks, 4 stables, and a lunge arena. % minutes hack and you are on the mountain, but horses need to be good in traffic to get onto the mountain (only 2 minutes on main road, but two mins is too mins too much if horse is bad in traffic).
My liveries just pay for stable, they come and look after their own horses, supply their own feed/bedding. I will feed if they are going somewhere etc but normally it's up to them. As a single parent, (not having a man about), I do appreciate the fact that both my liveries are male, and if I need help with physical stuff, like knocking down a round bale, etc.. It's great to have the help, therefore I give them a good deal on their stable.
Obviously, there are times when I would prefer them not to be there, but for the most part, it works well. I would hate to think that they werent happy, and I would hope that they would talk to me if they were unhappy. I'd talk to the YO, see if ye could sort it out, if not, i'd move. It's important that you and your horse are happy. xx
 

rodeo12

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Deciding whether to move yards is always a tricky decision. I've been wanting to leave mine for a few years now. Always getting put down by the YO to other people. I'm honestly amazed when a positive actually comes my way. I feel like I can't share my achievements because it will end up in a negative. Nothing has ever been said to me, but have always found out what's been said which makes it worse. One thing that was said was to an owner of a horse I was looking at to run alongside mine. I was horrified as the lady did say she was going to say no to me, but then thought about having seen me ride the horse before and didn't have a problem then. I have kept my horse where it is but just try and go at times when I avoid now. Although that brings accusations in itself about 'not looking after horse', 'never riding it'

I would say you have to do what makes you happy otherwise you'll end up like me, always coming back to the drawing board about whether to move or not. I begrudge what's happened now, and it makes my stomach go funny when I realise I've missed timed it. That's not what horses are about! Being at the stables is like a second home. You don't want an atmosphere. Part of horsey life is the people you share your moments with and having time to catch up and laugh and joke about things that happened. If you can't feel like you can relax down there without problems then really it is going to prevent you enjoying all sides of horsey life.
 

Tiffany

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If you don't trust the YO to do what you pay for then I would look for somewhere else. However, your horse is there 24/7 so if he/she is happy and it's just a clash of personalities then maybe best to accept you don't get on?
 

Twinkley Lights

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Serephin I feel for you I have had to leave a yard before and it was a real gamble but having found my boys new rug on the yard owners horse (perhaps my timing was too predictable) I felt I had no choice as the trust had gone. I moved to a great yard and had to move yards again after that when we moved house. Both times I moved to lovely yards where we were able to progress with the support of the yard owners it can be a gamble but you need to enjoy your time with your horse and trust the YO.
 
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