Bad name for both horse owners and farriers!

snopuma said:
Perfectly put!
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Sorry, I didn't actually say that my hubby was purely in it for the money...although I have re-read my original rant, and thought 'ooh dear...a bit stroppy here and there'...I said many farriers are in it for the money (as well as the own boss thing), which is TRUE...I wouldn't lie!...My husband isn't a horse fanatic to put it mildly, which may strike some of you as odd, but he became fascinated by the work of a farrier - the actual blacksmithing of it all! - years ago, and went into trainig and apprenticeship because of that...He does get satisfaction, especially when he's fixed bad feet or sorted a horse out where a vet has failed...My husband often encourages owners to have the shoes OFF, rather than on, in a lot of cases! And that's not for an easy life on his part, that's always for the good of the horse in question - and much cheaper for the owner!...My husband has also put himself out and gone the extra mile for a horse and its owner, countless times!...At the moment, a lady has been left somewhat in the lurch by her partner, not only is she devastated, but she's in a financial mess...she was fighting back tears when my husband shod her horse, and my husband refused to take payment, and told her she can pay him when she gets herself straight further down the line...he recognises folks in need when he sees them, he's no monster!...He often doesn't charge for trimming miniatures either, especially if he's already done fronts for example on anoter horse owned by his client...He does lower rates for multiple trims, too...all sorts...the man is a good man!...But beware - there ARE farriers out there who ARE solely in it to make money...We know a farrier who slings the shoes on asap - nail-binding the poor horse into the bargain - all because he wants to get as many in as possible, for the MONEY!...That's what I'm referring to...My husband isn't like that! But yes, he sees clients as clients - infact, he often recalls clients by their HORSES names alone..One or two are friends - but he's been shoeing their horses for years and years...Some of you have misread or misinterpreted what I was actually saying...I must have blasted in too strongly!!!
 
MrsdipWCF said:
Nope, didn't mean to imply that ALL and every farrier is a bad lad, nor did I intend to tar all women with the same brush - was tryin to stress that if that sort of open-air declaration of pursuing a 'spoken for' farrier is encouraged and accepted as the norm by most others, then it's going to cause bad reps to develop, widespread lack of trust - and there are too many men and women who find it so hard to trust as it is - on both sides...I am NOT attacking or tarring all women/horse owners OR all farriers ...the farrier-Client relationship should be a good one: for the welfare of the horse...If the farrier/plumber/astronaut is single, then of course there's no problem revealing a crush - but if they're NOT, then doesn't it matter that the girlfriend/wife of said farrier/plumber/astronaut might read about/hear about it, and get crushed? That's what I care about the most...but perhaps I put it in too strong a way, or worded my OP not as well as I could have...I am not attacking all...but yes I'll stand up and be counted against some..
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BUT... the same can be said for men and women in ANY and EVERY profession. I don't see why you felt the need to make your post just about farriers when you can apply the morals (which I agree with, in principle) to everyone. You can replace "farrier" in your OP with the name of any profession - whatever profession a man works in, it is wrong for another woman to chase after him, knowing he is attached. Farriers are not a special case. OP, if your OH was a dentist, a doctor or a builder, it would be wrong for any woman to openly pursue him if she knew he was attached/married.

The other points from your OP, essentially insinuating that farriers generally dislike their clients and would rather not see them at all... I would suggest those farriers take a look at who pays their bills! I work in sales and occasionally come across individual customers I don't especially like however I wouldn't dream of badmouthing them. Those customers are the people who make it possible for me to have a horse and live the life I lead, by keeping me in business. I can see why your OH might not be too keen on clients who throw themselves at him but in general, if he dislikes his clients then he ought to get a different job. Maybe he does enjoy the contact with the horses but it's the owners of those horses who make that possible for him.
 
Hovis_and_SidsMum said:
Can i just ask why this has come up now OP?
I'm not wishing to take away from your comments but the whole Starzan thing happened a while ago (unless there have been new postings recently which i've missed). Just wondered why this has been brought up now?
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I should have explained...I picked a thread at random here and there, not taking any notice of any dates, and immediately found myself reading the mentioned/referred to posts - which, I was stunned to see, were for all to read (and comment on) in such a public and 'couldn't care less' kind of way...I only just came on here...and that's what I saw...I have an opinion too, what can I say? I'm allowed to, aren't I? And I'm allowed to say "That's not right" if I think it's a dodgy subject/someone else could get badly hurt...Plus, if there are a legion of women out there who see married/spoken for farriers 'fair game' (I'm not saying there ARE, mind!) I'm going to stand up and speak out. That's all there is to it.
 
MrsdipWCF said:
Speaking as a farrier's wife, I was horrified to read posts on here from a 'lady' who, despie knowing her farrier WASN'T single, relentlessly pursued and flirted with him anyway!!!

The farrier, should be reported to the Registration Council and The Worshipful Company of Farriers, as he is bringing the profession into disgrace by behaving in such an unprofessional manner with a client...Farriers are there for the sole care of the horses feet, and to get paid for it!
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I understand your point about cheating etc, but i don't understand why the farrier in question should be reported.

i followed the 'saga' and even added comments to some of the threads. If i recall correctly the threads (certainly to begin with) were the outpourings of a young woman with a crush on her farrier. Said farrier was also a friend, i.e seen by the poster socially at the pub etc.
The poster said several times that she wouldnt make her feelings known to him as he was in a relationship. Yes there were comments from others suggesting ways to dispose of the gf (all said in a lighthearted tone in keeping with the posters tone), and after it was pointed out that the farrier had a gf and it was possible that she would/could be made aware of these posts, the OP stated again she wouldnt make a move on him because of the gf. However that didnt stop her having a crush on him. Yes some people slapped down the poster who pointed out that he had a gf. i personally do not agree with the 'alls fair in love and war' comments that were made in response to that. But we are all people with our own opinions on what is and is not acceptable

The farrier and poster did eventually start dating, but that was after he had split up with the gf (or at least thats what the poster believed, cant remember now what was what)

But back to my main point...what did the farrier do that warrants being reported? A client writing about him on a public forum in a Dear Diary sort of way...how was that his fault? Him flirting with a client?...we only have the posters 'word' that he was flirting, and anyway it's hardly a big deal, people flirt all the time without any real intent behind it. Him beginning a relationship with said client?...loads of people meet their OH's thro work, how is him being a farrier any different. Him possibly being a two-timer(i dont think the full facts were ever posted about, i may be wrong)...people cheat. its a fact of life. it's not nice to be on the receiving end of it (speaking from experience here) but i can't see how being a love-rat would bring a society/association/profession into disrepute.

Maybe a public forum wasnt the right place for her to post her musings, but she did, and as far as i was concerned it was all done in an amusing way that touched a nerve with anyone who has had a crush on someone who was unavailable.

ETA - just saw your last post. There were a great many threads/posts on the subject, some of them going on for pages and pages. i think for anyone who didnt follow/read them all the situation could read as a predatory woman out to get her prey regardless. in reality that wasnt the case, the girl in question repeatedly said she wouldnt declare her feelings whilst he was in a relationship.

and yes ofc you are entitled to your opinions, we all are. noone should hate anyone for having and expressing an opinion :)
 
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stressage21 said:
If i have got this correct, the farrier in question was single at the time, yes he had recently split from his girlfriend but was single.
With young lads out dying in afghanistan i think in the grand scheme of things this is a minor issue and people should make up their own opinions and keep them to themselves. As i mentioned before both the girl and farrier would be so upset that if they knew they were being gossiped about. The girl talked openly and honestly to people she considered friends, i dont see a problem with that. No one did anything wrong
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If I remember, the poster in question at time was making mention to 'another woman' whom he was involved with, which is why I made a comment when I did, to which I was shot down in flames for.

So, was he....or was he not involved with another woman at the time?

If you don't know, or I don't know...it makes no odds as it has bugger all to do with us, but I tell you what, if it had been ME who had been the 'other woman', to be spoken of so low, whether we knew that person or not, and I found out about the thread, there would be one or two choice words spoken, both here....and elsewhere!

People are individuals, it is unfair to say 'oh, get a grip, it's just a joke!'...because how do we know how the people feel? We don't.
 
chestnut cob said:
BUT... the same can be said for men and women in ANY and EVERY profession. I don't see why you felt the need to make your post just about farriers when you can apply the morals (which I agree with, in principle) to everyone. You can replace "farrier" in your OP with the name of any profession - whatever profession a man works in, it is wrong for another woman to chase after him, knowing he is attached. Farriers are not a special case. OP, if your OH was a dentist, a doctor or a builder, it would be wrong for any woman to openly pursue him if she knew he was attached/married.

The other points from your OP, essentially insinuating that farriers generally dislike their clients and would rather not see them at all... I would suggest those farriers take a look at who pays their bills! I work in sales and occasionally come across individual customers I don't especially like however I wouldn't dream of badmouthing them. Those customers are the people who make it possible for me to have a horse and live the life I lead, by keeping me in business. I can see why your OH might not be too keen on clients who throw themselves at him but in general, if he dislikes his clients then he ought to get a different job. Maybe he does enjoy the contact with the horses but it's the owners of those horses who make that possible for him.
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I totally agree, and I DID say farrier/plumber/astronaut...I did point out that I'm aware it's across the board...I also didn't say it was my husband who preferred no contact with the client! I know many farriers! And two of them have TOLD me that they'd much rather shoe the horse without the owner there!...I know farriers who like horses, but loathe dealing with the owners - and they wouldn't even give you a clue! I know farriers who don't even like horses! But yes, I also know farriers who love their job and all it entails - but in my own experience, the latter are thin on the ground...Perhaps that will change...Perhaps it won't.
 
Mogg said:
I understand your point about cheating etc, but i don't understand why the farrier in question should be reported.

i followed the 'saga' and even added comments to some of the threads. If i recall correctly the threads (certainly to begin with) were the outpourings of a young woman with a crush on her farrier. Said farrier was also a friend, i.e seen by the poster socially at the pub etc.
The poster said several times that she wouldnt make her feelings known to him as he was in a relationship. Yes there were comments from others suggesting ways to dispose of the gf (all said in a lighthearted tone in keeping with the posters tone), and after it was pointed out that the farrier had a gf and it was possible that she would/could be made aware of these posts, the OP stated again she wouldnt make a move on him because of the gf. However that didnt stop her having a crush on him.

The farrier and poster did eventually start dating, but that was after he had split up with the gf (or at least thats what the poster believed, cant remember now what was what)

But back to my main point...what did the farrier do that warrants being reported? A client writing about him on a public forum in a Dear Diary sort of way...how was that his fault? Him flirting with a client?...we only have the posters 'word' that he was flirting, and anyway it's hardly a big deal, people flirt all the time without any real intent behind it. Him beginning a relationship with said client?...loads of people meet their OH's thro work, how is him being a farrier any different. Him possibly being a two-timer(i dont think the full facts were ever posted about, i may be wrong)...people cheat. its a fact of life. it's not nice to be on the receiving end of it (speaking from experience here) but i can't see how being a love-rat would bring a society/association/profession into disrepute.

Maybe a public forum wasnt the right place for her to post her musings, but she did, and as far as i was concerned it was all done in an amusing way that touched a nerve with anyone who has had a crush on someone who was unavailable.

ETA - just saw your last post. There were a great many threads/posts on the subject, some of them going on for pages and pages. i think for anyone who didnt follow/read them all the situation could read as a predatory woman out to get her prey regardless. in reality that wasnt the case, the girl in question repeatedly said she wouldnt declare her feelings whilst he was in a relationship.

and yes ofc you are entitled to your opinions, we all are. noone should hate anyone for having and expressing an opinion :)
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I think The Worsipful Company of Farriers WOULD consider any farrier, who uses his profession to score with clients (if he IS doing so) as hardly caring about the welfare of the horses, or the professional aspect of the farrier profession...The client/farrier relationship is supposed to entail mutual respectful behaviour...and if a client KNOWS that a farrier has a spouse or girlfriend, or/and if the said farrier KNOWS he's using his profession to play around, then there isn't much respect going on! That was my point.
 
chestnut cob said:
BUT... the same can be said for men and women in ANY and EVERY profession. I don't see why you felt the need to make your post just about farriers when you can apply the morals (which I agree with, in principle) to everyone. You can replace "farrier" in your OP with the name of any profession - whatever profession a man works in, it is wrong for another woman to chase after him, knowing he is attached. Farriers are not a special case. OP, if your OH was a dentist, a doctor or a builder, it would be wrong for any woman to openly pursue him if she knew he was attached/married.

The other points from your OP, essentially insinuating that farriers generally dislike their clients and would rather not see them at all... I would suggest those farriers take a look at who pays their bills! I work in sales and occasionally come across individual customers I don't especially like however I wouldn't dream of badmouthing them. Those customers are the people who make it possible for me to have a horse and live the life I lead, by keeping me in business. I can see why your OH might not be too keen on clients who throw themselves at him but in general, if he dislikes his clients then he ought to get a different job. Maybe he does enjoy the contact with the horses but it's the owners of those horses who make that possible for him.
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I work in sales too - I'm a Sales Administrator, and I've been on the receiving end of abusive customers and also witnessed other staff having to suck it up too, a few times. I am always polite and calm - although, outside of my job, I damn well wouldn't be!...I know the role of professionalism...I know that 'we' have to sometimes deal with all sorts...And this is somewhat a chicken and egg debate when it comes to the 'farriers-need-customers customers-need-farriers' thing! Horses will always benefit from farriery - horses lives have been saved by farriers at times...If you want to own a horse (or any other animal before I get shelled!) then you must be prepared to care for it and have its needs met and pay for medical and all necessary expensense to keep your animal healthy and happy, right? - that's a fact. No different from having a child...but I would never have said to my GP, whenever my child needed his expert medical intervention and advice: "Listen Mr GP, if I hadn't given birth, you wouldn't be in this job!" would I?

My husband ISN'T the way you seem to think I suggested...I was stating that, out of the farriers I know, many of them just want to get on with the job in hand and get paid for it. Nothing more, nothing less. I actually think it's great that you're all 'pulling me up' on comments I've made..at least it's all constructive and serving a purpose...and maybe, just maybe, all of us will learn something new here and there - as flamin' condescending as I've just made myself sound! Christ it's breezy up here!
 
benson21 said:
O come on, are you for real?? Could you not tell that it was all tongue in cheek? really? i used to enjoy hearing about all the welly dancing etc etc, gave us all a giggle.
If you really think its a problem, then maybe you need to look at trust issues with your OH!!
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Yes, I am "for real"...and I don't think a farrier's GF or wife would see any laughable side if she recognised her old man or his client openly talking and joking about her and her man. Would you?
 
amymay said:
MrsDip - Me thinks the lady doth protest too much......

As for farriers not wanting clients around when shoeing horses - that's never been my experience.

Tea and gossip on tap. Plus great advice and discussion on horses feet and condition etc., all so invaluable for the owner.

My farrier, his wife and kids all have horses, and are very involved in the horseworld generally.
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Cool response :)
 
MrsdipWCF said:
Yes, I am "for real"...and I don't think a farrier's GF or wife would see any laughable side if she recognised her old man or his client openly talking and joking about her and her man. Would you?
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Let's put it this way.....I'd be pretty fed-up if I heard about some forum where my husband was being discussed in this way, and I was talked about in a derogatory way!

Sure, if someone fancied my husband, then I'd think great....glad I've got him...BUT if I, as the woman in his life was being somewhat insulted......

And no, this does NOT mean anyone is insecure, having a bad time..etc etc etc....
 
NeilM said:
On the whole question of money. Why shouldn't a farrier just do it for the money. How many of us would do what we do for a living unless we got paid. I work to pay the bills, I'm very good at my job and I do the best, most professional job I can, but that does not mean I wouldn't give it up tomorrow if I won the Lotto.

As for the originals posts, from a blokes perspective I read a couple of post and then avoided the whole thread and all subsequent posts by the OP, as I didn't enjoy the thread or the subject matter.

Some guys like flirting and being pursued, it's good for their ego's and some of us don't enjoy that kind of thing at all, I guess it's all down to the individual person.

As an aside, my OH and I both get on well with our present farrier and I used to go shooting with our last farrier, until he emigrated to Australia, he never mentioned amorous advances, but he did used to get very annoyed at bad / non payers.
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Yep, my husband gets annoyed with bad payers too...it costs a fortune to stock up with tools and gas etc., not to mention the hard slog beneath a heavy horse, so it isn't great when the client bounces a cheque or forgets to bring the cash!...Glad to hear a bloke doesn't agree with the 'cheating' side of some females (or males) either! And thanks for not ripping into me for having an opinion! My husband would quit if he won the lotto, too.

I worry about him every single day he goes out, afraid he'll get badly hurt one day...there's that side of it, too!
 
Most farriers have hundreds of clients, and each client is just a drop in a big ocean of other female horse owners they have to visit....In fact, most farriers prefer it when the owners aren't there, and they don't have to deal with the humans!...A lot of farriers - and I know many, including my hubby - have less than positive or attractive comments to make about their many clients, and most wouldn't "touch a horsey woman with a barge pole"...Whether you want to face it or not, most, if not all, farriers, are in it for the hourly rate!...Money. And most, after a few years, would gladly pack it all in.


I have to say I would be mortified if my farrier felt this way, not because I find him remotely attractive but it is just plain bad manners.
I think my farrier is great but we have a professional relationship, he does my horses feet I pay him simple as.
I wouldn't have an opinion about him other than how he does his job I would hate for him to have any other opinion of me other than I look after my horses well and dont give him agro. To find out he might be going home on an evening and telling his wife that I am 'dog rough' and 'he wouldn't touch me with a barge pole' is just horrible for one I dont think thats a very nice thing to say and two why on earth would he be thinking that anyway.
You post made me feel like my farrier might be like your OH and go home slagging me off to all and sundry which is frankly unacceptable.

I would never have a farrier that disliked horses or was just in it for the money, to come and do my horses feet as I think it would affect his farrier ability to not have compassion and feeling for the horse. It would also send my difficult mare round the twist if he didnt have a feel for horses.

I would be very upset if my farrier wanted to do MY horses on his own. TBF he is in a profession where he meets the general public and as such should at least be able to bear them for the hour it takes to shoe a horse.

I have to say you have painted your OH in a very bad light and if I was him I would be quite upset.
 
BigRed said:
Farriers not having horsey wives ? Nonsense. My farrier's wife has horses, my old farriers wife has horses, in fact pretty much all the farriers I know have wives who were clients and have horses. I am not saying any of my farriers have been flirtatious, but it does happen !
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It isn't "nonsense". It's fact. Out of the 12 farriers I know personally, not one of them owns a horse, rides a horse, or is married/in a relationship with a horse owner...So we differ in our experiences, don't we?...Therefore, that difference, does not make my revelations "nonsense"..It makes them different, to yours. That's all... I also know a female apprentice who has no interest in owning or riding a horse..."Have you never ridden?" I asked her.
"Not bloody likely! No thanks!" was her reply.

The Messenger is often wounded, isn't he eh?
 
MrsdipWCF said:
I think The Worsipful Company of Farriers WOULD consider any farrier, who uses his profession to score with clients (if he IS doing so) as hardly caring about the welfare of the horses, or the professional aspect of the farrier profession...The client/farrier relationship is supposed to entail mutual respectful behaviour...and if a client KNOWS that a farrier has a spouse or girlfriend, or/and if the said farrier KNOWS he's using his profession to play around, then there isn't much respect going on! That was my point.
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sorry I have to comment on this one and won't get embroiled in a heated debate over it but like hell would the Worshipful Company of Farriers care - have you ever dealt with them over any matter? Their concern should be with horse welfare - if a farrier is 'servicing' his clients that is not at all professional imo, but it hardly affects his shoeing now does it?

There are far more important horse welfare issues that I would like to see the Worshipful Company of Farriers dealing with than worrying about infidelity!!! If a farrier is harrassing his clients - different matter entirely.
 
DragonSlayer said:
Let's put it this way.....I'd be pretty fed-up if I heard about some forum where my husband was being discussed in this way, and I was talked about in a derogatory way!

Sure, if someone fancied my husband, then I'd think great....glad I've got him...BUT if I, as the woman in his life was being somewhat insulted......

And no, this does NOT mean anyone is insecure, having a bad time..etc etc etc....
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My sentiments EXACTLY! I like you! (and all the steel knicker-wearing ladies are yelling: "Yeah, you WOULD!" at me, I'm sure...I'm not daft!)
 
YasandCrystal said:
sorry I have to comment on this one and won't get embroiled in a heated debate over it but like hell would the Worshipful Company of Farriers care - have you ever dealt with them over any matter? Their concern should be with horse welfare - if a farrier is 'servicing' his clients that is not at all professional imo, but it hardly affects his shoeing now does it?

ohhhhhhhhhhhh i don't know if he services a few he might me knackered lol
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goldenmint said:
Most farriers have hundreds of clients, and each client is just a drop in a big ocean of other female horse owners they have to visit....In fact, most farriers prefer it when the owners aren't there, and they don't have to deal with the humans!...A lot of farriers - and I know many, including my hubby - have less than positive or attractive comments to make about their many clients, and most wouldn't "touch a horsey woman with a barge pole"...Whether you want to face it or not, most, if not all, farriers, are in it for the hourly rate!...Money. And most, after a few years, would gladly pack it all in.


I have to say I would be mortified if my farrier felt this way, not because I find him remotely attractive but it is just plain bad manners.
I think my farrier is great but we have a professional relationship, he does my horses feet I pay him simple as.
I wouldn't have an opinion about him other than how he does his job I would hate for him to have any other opinion of me other than I look after my horses well and dont give him agro. To find out he might be going home on an evening and telling his wife that I am 'dog rough' and 'he wouldn't touch me with a barge pole' is just horrible for one I dont think thats a very nice thing to say and two why on earth would he be thinking that anyway.
You post made me feel like my farrier might be like your OH and go home slagging me off to all and sundry which is frankly unacceptable.

I would never have a farrier that disliked horses or was just in it for the money, to come and do my horses feet as I think it would affect his farrier ability to not have compassion and feeling for the horse. It would also send my difficult mare round the twist if he didnt have a feel for horses.

I would be very upset if my farrier wanted to do MY horses on his own. TBF he is in a profession where he meets the general public and as such should at least be able to bear them for the hour it takes to shoe a horse.

I have to say you have painted your OH in a very bad light and if I was him I would be quite upset.
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I doubt very much that your farrier WOULD have a negative opinion of you! Once again, though, I find myself having to explain my remarks more thoroughly: Farriers I associate with, have many clients they aren't very fond of - put it that way. And, although some farriers might let 'you' know they really don't want to get into a conversation with you etc., and just want to get on with their job, most that I know, wouldn't let on - however, they DO talk about these things to their families/girlfriends/spouses, close personal friends...I even know farriers who warn their apprentices about the behaviouof their clients more than the behaiour of any horses. I'm sorry. But those are the facts...They don't just slag off a client, by the way, the client has to DO someting to annoy them first!...But beware, once a client starts messin' a farrier around - beit in whatever way - that client will have landed his/herself a rep with the farrier at best, and be passed over (sacked) at worst...There ARE badly behaved clients you know!
 
MrsdipWCF said:
Nope, didn't mean to imply that ALL and every farrier is a bad lad, nor did I intend to tar all women with the same brush - was tryin to stress that if that sort of open-air declaration of pursuing a 'spoken for' farrier is encouraged and accepted as the norm by most others, then it's going to cause bad reps to develop, widespread lack of trust - and there are too many men and women who find it so hard to trust as it is - on both sides...I am NOT attacking or tarring all women/horse owners OR all farriers ...the farrier-Client relationship should be a good one: for the welfare of the horse...If the farrier/plumber/astronaut is single, then of course there's no problem revealing a crush - but if they're NOT, then doesn't it matter that the girlfriend/wife of said farrier/plumber/astronaut might read about/hear about it, and get crushed? That's what I care about the most...but perhaps I put it in too strong a way, or worded my OP not as well as I could have...I am not attacking all...but yes I'll stand up and be counted against some...The description 'in a nutshell' you gave of my first post was brilliant! Made me me chuckle.
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At least I made you laugh! :D TBH, I didn't read the threads you were referring to so I can't judge if people were declaring open season on farriers or not.

I'm off to find some vet wrap......
 
YasandCrystal said:
sorry I have to comment on this one and won't get embroiled in a heated debate over it but like hell would the Worshipful Company of Farriers care - have you ever dealt with them over any matter? Their concern should be with horse welfare - if a farrier is 'servicing' his clients that is not at all professional imo, but it hardly affects his shoeing now does it?

There are far more important horse welfare issues that I would like to see the Worshipful Company of Farriers dealing with than worrying about infidelity!!! If a farrier is harrassing his clients - different matter entirely.
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Oh but they DO care about the conduct of farriers during the carrying out of farriery. And if a farrier were to bombard a client with amorous advances in a multitude of texts - and she didn't appreciate it - THAT'S harrassment. So flirty farriers ought to watch their step..The farrier could claim the same, I might add. No heat here. Just a debate!
 
ladyt25 said:
I understand your point although it comes across as you being a bit concerned. At the end of the day the OH should be trusted enough to handle themselves surely and, as said, it does take two and I personally do not see the harm in the posts that were put on here (I think I know which ones you mean), it is perfectly normal for people to have 'crushes' whether it be a celebrity or their farrier - it doesn't mean anything is going to happen, it's more fantasy land surely! That said, relationships DO end and maybe an attached farrier, vet, physio etc etc could quite possibly meet someone else through their work, These things do happen! It's not different than an office environment I'm afraid - these things go on. Everyone has their own mind and should be able to control themselves at the end of the day. People flirt everyday, doesn't mean they're going to jump into bed with each other!!!
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I didn't get the impression it WAS just 'fantasy land' though! The posts gave me, a total stranger, the absolute impression that not only was the female in question saying quite clearly that no matter what, she was going to get her way with the farrier, but she was also giving the impression that a) she didn't give a stuff about his girlfriend and b) the farrier was also hotly pursuing her too!...(reference to dozen upon dozen of text messages received from the farrier, comes to mind)...Imagine if you were the girlfriend or wife and read that? Would you laugh? Would you feel comfortable?

If a farrier/vet/astronaut (I've said it all before) feels attracted to someone else other than his GF or spouse, then he should end his relationship BEFORE chasing the hemline of another maiden! ...Let me tell you story: before I was married, I was pursued by a plasterer who constantly asked me out for a drink...I constantly pointed to his wedding band and said: "The day you aren't married is the day you can ask me out - until that day, knock it OFF!"...He remained married...has had 2 affairs, I hear...His wife remains with him (for now) but is a shadow of her former self...A nice looking and friendly bloke he may be...but he can never be trusted. Both of those things are sad. Really sad.

You are so right, at the end of the day both parties should be able to control themselves...but sadly, it seems, more and more people just don't care about hurting other people.
 
MrsdipWCF said:
Speaking as a farrier's wife, I was horrified to read posts on here from a 'lady' who, despie knowing her farrier WASN'T single, relentlessly pursued and flirted with him anyway!!!

The farrier, should be reported to the Registration Council and The Worshipful Company of Farriers, as he is bringing the profession into disgrace by behaving in such an unprofessional manner with a client...Farriers are there for the sole care of the horses feet, and to get paid for it!

The horse owner in question should take a long hard look at herself and question her own morals.

Most farriers have hundreds of clients, and each client is just a drop in a big ocean of other female horse owners they have to visit....In fact, most farriers prefer it when the owners aren't there, and they don't have to deal with the humans!...A lot of farriers - and I know many, including my hubby - have less than positive or attractive comments to make about their many clients, and most wouldn't "touch a horsey woman with a barge pole"...Whether you want to face it or not, most, if not all, farriers, are in it for the hourly rate!...Money. And most, after a few years, would gladly pack it all in.

Every farrier I know has either a partner or a wife, and ALL of those CHOSE their partners and wives - they weren't pursued by women with no self-respect or void of morals...and funnily enough (although, to farriers' wives, it's common knowledge) not a single spouse of a farrier I know is a horse owner.

So what does that tell you?

Keep your shoeing/trimming/remedial dates professional! It's about the HORSE!
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ROFLMAO :D

This has got to be a wind up surely!

My farrier is only a 'drop in the ocean' of service providers that I make use of.

I wouldn't touch him, intimately, with someone else's bargepole :eek::p:D

I used to work with 5,000 engineers, didn't touch any of them either; even though a few made suggestions (on a daily basis) I wouldn't dream of hauling them up on a forum or any other media means. Guess what, I IGNORED IT!! I'M A GROWN-UP, I CAN DO THAT KIND OF THING, an ability that I do not believe is purely female biased.


Edited to add: our farriers prefer that we are there to hold our horses. And as most of ours have issues of one sort or another, and even if they didn't, I would still want to be there to discuss the horse's care, the farrier's views/findings/opinions, to impart any latest information from my vet. I really would not like such an important part of my horses care to go on without one of us being present.
 
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Wagtail said:
OP the key is not to think about it. Put it right out of your mind. Virtually all jobs involve men and women coming into contact with the opposite sex. My husband is a senior executive and has a couple of hundred women working for him. I am sure quite a few of them fancy getting their hands on his income (or him, who knows?) But if I sat at home thinking abou it, then it would do damage to my mental health. So I don't. You have to remember that if someone is going to cheat, they will cheat and there is nothing you can do about it. Nowadays with mobile phones and all kind of other communication methods, it is just too easy! So don't think about it. Be a good wife. That is the best you can do.
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What a fabulous response. A wise woman, I'm thinking! I think you speak perfect sense!
 
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