Calling all Mums with horses and young children

[nicelittle]

Excellent thread.
I am mother to two kids, 5 and 9. I had shared a horse for last 4 years, he was sadly put down in November.

My kids loved him, and he loved them, my daughter would lead him to field, brush him. My son (5) would stand on a box to brush him, and there would be an argument about who picked out the first hoof, (thank goodness horses have an even number of legs). He was so so gentle with them and we all miss him very much.
My daughter still keeps asking to go to the stables, even though hes not there, and both children keep refering to him being in heaven (which is rather painful for me, TBH)

However, now thinking of new venture with my sister, getting a horse for us and pony for the kids. Watch this space!

 

[toffeesmarty]

We have 3 children aged 19 - 11, 8 horses at a yrad 10 mins drive from home, 3 dogs, 4 cats, 2 hamsters and some fish LOL so I know every time saving practice there is!

On the day my eldest was born I lunged my then horse.
I remember the midwifes face when I asked her how soon after my cesearean it would be safe to start riding.
She looked at me with a pained expression and said:

'I would not be happy with you going bumpety bumpety for atleast 6 weeks my dear.
I responded -
' I don't do bumpety bumpety - I ride'.

I was on board 3 weeks later. Nearly 20 years on I dont know how I did it!
Only one of the children rides - the others do dancing and football, so it hasnt been easy juggling their different needs but I dont think that is any different to any other family.

 

[vikkibeth]

On the day my eldest was born I lunged my then horse.
I remember the midwifes face when I asked her how soon after my cesearean it would be safe to start riding.
She looked at me with a pained expression and said:

'I would not be happy with you going bumpety bumpety for atleast 6 weeks my dear.
I responded -
' I don't do bumpety bumpety - I ride'.

I was on board 3 weeks later.

I didnt have a cesarean but was told off by my Midwife fore riding just under three weeks later (she only found out cause my husband dobbed me in)!

 

[littlefox]

Hi,

I have 3 dogs 3 cats a 16.1 Irish gelding , husband , 5 year old son and just found out I'm expecting again.

My son loves all our pets he helps point out the poo in the paddock so I can pick it up!

He is slightly dysbraxic and has riding lessons to help with balance and loves it. I found winter very hard as he started school full time this January I had 3 hours to fit everything in that time. Baby is due December but I hope to have a loan for 3 days to help out, yard are very helpful too so I'm very lucky. I hope to ride until I am told otherwise or find it to hard. I'm glad there are mums in my situation I get grief by ppl asking me how I manage and more so with a young baby. I will bring baby to the yard . I love my horse to bits and would never be without him. Although winters are hard the mucking out kept me fit and shall keep going until I can't go on lol. My horse keeps me sane I hope this new baby will just fit in .....

 

[millreef]

We have 2 children (one is 19 and one 11), five horses/ponies. Life is rich

 

[ElleSkywalker]

I love this post, I don't have any children, but do have a 3 ponies & a foal, and am SICK of people saying 'ooo if you have kiddies you won't want your horses anymore, you'll have no time to ride and won't want little bubs getting all muddy in field while you mess about with ponies...' blah blah

I had a riding instructor who gave herself 5 days off teaching when her daughter was born (teaching right up till she dropped) and am so glad she isn't the only one and if I ever do have kids am not going to end up all yummy mummy 'don't go near the smelly horses little one' and will in fact stay 'normal' and be able to have both, allbeit with alot of hard work I am sure.

Thanks guys for the reasurrance!!!

 

[mrsbt]

I too have loads of animals, 3 dogs, 2 cats, a rabbit, a lizard, 2 horses (one is only 2) and a 1 year old daughter. Sister also has a horse and a pony and we share looking after them.
Throughout the pregnancy i carried on doing everything, mucking out 3 (no pony at the time), lunging and looking after the foal.
The day i went into labour i was up at the yard most of the day, my girl had the physio, and people were quite concerned i would give birth in the stable as was getting quite alot of strong contractions.
My daughter comes up to the yard with me in the mornings and from when she was born had to be there while i mucked out, often strapped onto me in her carrier.

I couldnt imagine not having my horses just because i had a baby.

 

[tootsietoo]

I have 3 & 4 year old girls, 4 horses at home, a hound puppy this summer and a non horsey husband.

I wouldn't want to give anyone the impression that it is easy, but it is possible and the many upsides make the work worthwhile. I like things done properly, but I have had to let standards slip a bit (yard rarely swept, tack only cleaned when going out in public!) which has been taken a while to get used to. The children do everything with me usually, although this winter was very hard as it was too cold for them so they watched a lot of cbeebies while I was outside which made me feel guilty. The only thing I can't do is ride, so if you have parents nearby for childcare, which I don't, that would help. Having said that, I do sometimes take them all off to an arena or xc schooling and the children play while I canter round them. Getting the horse fit for hunting involved a bit of spending on childcare and lots of favours!

We have a welshie and a Shetland and both children ride, and they are just getting to the age where it is fun. I might be able to take the older one out cubbing with me next season and they both love riding and playing with their ponies. It makes me all warm and fuzzy watching them!

 

[RuthnMeg]

I am another in the 'mad' league.
2 children, 7 and nearly 5, 3 horses and 1 dog AND the husband (does that come under kids/horse or dog? lol)
My daughter likes to play ponies, and has ridden. She lost her confidence a bit, so playing is great for her... my son would just like to go fast no doubt!
I worked throughout my first pregnancy on an event yard, rode other horses til I was 5 months gone, and continued to ride mine til I was 7 months gone. I was back in the saddle 4 weeks later (c-sec). Similar story with baby no 2.
I currently juggle, kids, school runs, riding my own, working at a TB stud, playing badminton/keeping fit and looking after the joint. I would not have it any other way. I am happy, life is good and always full of fun and adventure.
I am not a person who sits at home moaning 'I can't get out of the house' - in fact, I moan about going back to the house!!

 

[Lydz13]

My friends all seem to think that I am crazy, I have a 4 year old and a 15 week old and have taken the plunge and have finally bought my own pony (after having had 5 years of a loan pony). I have also three lovely mutts and a husband

They all don't seem to understand that I can cope and find it hard to sit down for more than 5 minutes, they all seem to think that I should me a dribbling mess. I was down at the yard the day after my son was born and didn't make it in on the day my son was born simply cause my husband had to sit on me!!! I was riding again 3 weeks after.

Please tell me there are other crazy ladies out there supporting my madness, it would be nice to speak to people who are happy with both family and animal life

1 husband
1 dog - Billy
1 7 yo stepson
1 7yo daughter
1 4yo daughter
2 cats - Squeak & Tiggy
2 ferrets - Hemi & Sydney
1 47 hour a week job

Lady Darco (15.1 7 yo m/weigh cob type) arrived today!!

I am definitely crazy...

 

[tootsietoo]

Just a little lecture now people. It is NOT a good idea to be riding in the first few weeks after a section! A friend did herself bad damage by not looking after herself and can't safely have any more children now.

 

[Lynz25]

This is such a good post.

I've got 2 rabbits, 2 cats, 2 horses and a 5 month old jack russell puppy. We are hoping to start a family fairly soon so its good to know it can be done. I've said to my husband that I'll be riding through my pregnancy and he has already said he will not try and stop me.

Can I ask though what you do with your babies when your riding or competing??? I can not wait to have a year off (hopefully) on maternity leave so that I can actually try and get back on track with progressing the horses.

 

[tootsietoo]

Well, you can leave them with your mother or other family member or good friend, or pay someone to babysit. Some of my friends ride early before hubby goes to work and he gets the baby up. If you've got access to an arena you can park them up next to it while you ride. I guess this would work well if you have a reliable sleeper. When they're older, say three ish, they can play in field or arena while you ride. Obviously the latter two are not ideal as if you are in charge of the baby/children and have an accident.......

I managed ten days hunting last season and the husband has the children then. He likes it as it is "brownie points" for days out for him! and he is very supportive of me riding - I know some are not so good!

However, I didn't ride for three and a half years as I had the babies sixteen months apart and breastfed both for about seven months and was useless at expressing so I couldn't very easily leave them with other people when they were babies. I did the horse, but riding just seemed too complicated.

 

[tootsietoo]

Lynz - just noticed you called it a year off! It is a break from the office grind, but it is not a year off! The tiredness, you have never known such tiredness........ And they ALWAYS seem to need you.

You will need to have good childcare to be able to make progress with the horses.

 

[emmanash]

Hi there,
I'm a mummy/horse owner too!
I have an 8yr old, 6yr old and my mare Tawny. I also work 30hrs a week and have to fit in walking the dog and running the house etc too. Oh and find some time for my long suffering hubby. I wouldn't be without my horse even though I have so much to cram into my days.
I keep her on grass livery which definately helps me time wise. On work days I go up to the yard before work and then get home and sort the kiddies out for school.I work three 10 hour shifts at the hospital so I pop in and check on my horse on the way home on work days. I then get 2 days off in the week to spend riding etc when I've dropped the children off at school, plus every weekend off too. My dog often comes with me to the yard and has a walk so I kill two birds with one stone.
Unfortunately, neither of my children are horsey, but they do live active outdoor lifestyles and do come with me sometimes and play with the dog whilst I fuss the horse. They're at the age now where I can leave them playing on their D.S games in the car when the weather's bad and I don't have to worry about them getting up to mischief.
It seems impossible when you think about it too much, but it really does work out well and I love being busy and living my life to the full!
It's lovely to read about other mums with horses

 

[stu&mich]

I was going to ask what about us dads - but having read this I reckon I have it easy. We have 2 boys (6 & 9) and 4 horses (1 each) and I have my own business which takes a lot of hours and until Christmas my wife also ran her own business and we fit it all in somehow but then I think we're lucky that we all enjoy it. Would imagine it would be much harder if any of us resented the time we spend in the middle of a field.

I think it is great for children, I rode from a young age and it taught me loads and gives me many of my favourite memories and my boys love getting dirty and running around - the other day I was stopped in tesco by an elderly lady who said how nice it was to see a real little boy, I looked down and realised my son was filthy with mud all over his face, wearing muddy jods & boots and with a huge smile on his face. It was sign that he had had a good day lol

 

[feisty_filly]

hi all! im 21, i have a 16 month old little boy and im 24 weeks pregnant with our 2nd child. i also have a hubbie, 2 cats, a dog, a yearling cob and a shetland pony!. i dont understand why people shouldnt have kids and horses, im a stay at home mum so i look after ryan in the day and hubbie turns the horse out then hubbie looks after ryan after work so i can go bring in / muck out ect. they also come up the yard with me alot, ryan loves playing in the dirt and shavings!

 

[vikkibeth]

the other day I was stopped in tesco by an elderly lady who said how nice it was to see a real little boy, I looked down and realised my son was filthy with mud all over his face, wearing muddy jods & boots and with a huge smile on his face. It was sign that he had had a good day lol

I think thats lovely, I agree with the elderly lady! My boy ends up looking like that most afternoons!

 

[Winklepoker]

I LOVE THIS THREAD!

We have just stopped birth control in hope of starting a family and I have no plans to get rid of my boy. I have some very very good friends who I know will be there for me every step of the way. I am an Army wife living over 200 miles away from any family help and I too see several fat arsed women around camp filling their days with Jeremy Kyle because having a child limits them so much!!

I cant wait if Im honest. I have a good horse who wont intentionally try and dump me and a hubby who I know will be very helpful. Financially at times we might struggle but who cares... we'll manage

Out of interest, what do you do with baby whilst at the yard? leave it in the stable in the pram? lay it in the feed bin/muck heap/wheelbarrow?

 

[dalesslave]

I am due in 6 weeks its good to read there is life after birth for parents as i was starting to panic ! just a quick enquiry as to how soon you where all able to get back in the saddle after labour ? i would like to do a m&m showing class about 2weeks after my due date and people arn't very encouraging

 

[Cazzah]

Good to hear I'm not the only 'crazy' one!

I work full time as a HR Manager with a UK remit looking after 3000 employees so guess you could say its a pretty full on job! I have an 18 month old boy, two dogs, one OH, and a TB who I compete in just about everything - and keep DIY at my friend's.

Little boy loves the horse but as he can be a grumpy sod (horse, not child, lol) this means I have to manage my time down the yard carefully. But I pop the horse in the stable so kid can run around with me while I poo pick etc. He comes to most shows with me too and absolutely loves it. If he is still as keen he'll be getting a little pony next year too

I have to manage my time carefully but its definitely do-able. This time of year makes it lots easier for me as I go riding after my son is in bed during the week.

My OH is right now at an interview for a fab job and I've already warned him that if he gets it I'll be having another horse - hopefully a 2/3 year old to break and bring on over the next few years

Must be mad!

 

[vikkibeth]

Winklepoker-I left my boy in the car parked in the yard when I muck picked etc but when I rode I was lucky enough to alway have someone ie husband/lady who owned the yard keep an eye on him. Now he's 7 months and always very interested in what I do it's either the car seat in a safe place or most of the time he's in his push chair which is just for the yard. He loves it already! Give him a couple of months and I'll have him poo picking

Dalesslave-I was lucky after my not so nice pregnancy I was given a break and had a very quick and easy labor. I was back the day after mucking out and rode about 3 weeks later but was told off by everyone(midwife gave me such a telling off!!) I have been told that you can hurt yourself a lot if your body isn't ready yet. You might want to check with your midwife/doctor just to be sure I guess.

 

[vikkibeth]

Cazzah - hope your husband gets the job, have my fingers x

 

[crazyhorse4727]

Hey I've an 11month old daugther, while I was pregnant with her I had charge of 3 horses to break and bring on also my own horse. I gave up the other 3 after afew scare trips to the hospital. But still worked with my own.
I also have an oh,
a rescue dog,
I'm looking at the min to start breeding afew animals as I did this throughout school, so shopping around for,
2 french lops, 2 netherland darwes, 2 dutchies, to start with in bunnies and 2 cockatiels, 2 lovebirds and a handful of finchs.
We're also thinking of trying for our 2nd baby after afew months aslong as I get the ok from the doctor, as I'd a c-section.
After I've had the 2nd I'm either planing to buy 2 yearlings to produce or a young filly to bring on then put in foal.
At the moment my daugther is brillant she loves being outside so it keeps me sane as I don't live near anyone and I'm on my own for 10hr days.
But as long as I have all my babies around me I wouldn't change a thing!

 

[bumblelion]

I have an 8 month old daughter, 2 horses, 2 rottweilers and a rabbit! They're all at home too so I have to do everything myself! Including harrowing fields etc! My partner works away all week so I have to cope and no family or friends nearby! I do cope though, very well I think! My daughter just has to go with the flow! I put her in the tack room the other day in her travel cot, whilst I went out and sprayed the ragwort!! I haven't got around to riding yet as my two are both very sharp and that's the only thing about being here alone, if I came off, no one would know and the signal for mobiles is quite hit and miss! That's changing from next month though so I can't wait to get back on board!!!
Personally I can't comprehend it when other mums say, god, I'm knackered it's so hard being a mum!! Sat in their flat, with no garden, living in a town, and no pets, oh and a partner to help them with everything!!

 

[monte1]

what a fab post, can I join in!!!!!

I have a husband, a 12 year old daughter, 2 horses, 2 working gundogs and an aviary of birds. I work 30 hours a week and commute 30 miles a day to and from work. horses kept on a lovely DIY livery yard and I can leave them out 24/7 all year round if I want to , that makes life MUCH easier.!!

i get out and compete a fair bit nowadays, I originally bought my current horse as a rising 2 year old when daughter was just 2 1/2, backed and schooled myself, fitting everything in around her as best I could, so it can be done!!!

Like many of you on here, I cant sit still for 5 minutes , so, love the hussle and bustle of fitting it all in. just would not know what to do without my horse!!

it was a bit harder when daughter was smaller I had an older mare and TBH I didnt get as much riding in as I do now, fitting in horse, housework, work and a new baby is not easy, but, so worth it and with a little help from friends etc we managed - daughter just loves riding her horse, being at the yard and generally being outdoors, was down there from few days old, well wrapped up and rarely gets ill is very healthy and doesnt mind getting filthy dirty !!

I also dont understand these mums who cant do anything because of the kids, mine comes everywhere with us and fits in with what we do, I think it makes her a better and more rounded person who gets to see the world, understands how to behave around animals and isn't just sat in front of the TV all day

 

[Spyda]

*Waves*

I've got children (13, 12, 9 and 7), 2 dogs, 3 cats, 3 rats, 3 ferrets, 14 guinea pigs, 3 chickens and a large planted tropical aquarium to look after and am still in once peice (although the house could do with a good tidy most of the time!) Oh, and just the 1 horse ATM. Did have 5 horses all at once back along when I was breeding and the stud they were boarded at 'up country' closed suddenly due to bereavement and illness. These days, just the one horse is enough.... although I may consider adding a pony for the children if the right one came along

Oh... and as they get older you can put the children to good use whilst you muck out!!! LOL

 

[bumblelion]

I LOVE THIS THREAD!

We have just stopped birth control in hope of starting a family and I have no plans to get rid of my boy. I have some very very good friends who I know will be there for me every step of the way. I am an Army wife living over 200 miles away from any family help and I too see several fat arsed women around camp filling their days with Jeremy Kyle because having a child limits them so much!!

I cant wait if Im honest. I have a good horse who wont intentionally try and dump me and a hubby who I know will be very helpful. Financially at times we might struggle but who cares... we'll manage

Out of interest, what do you do with baby whilst at the yard? leave it in the stable in the pram? lay it in the feed bin/muck heap/wheelbarrow?

Winklepoker, I'v got the advantage of having the horses at home (well, is until stables leak or fields need maintaining!!). I took my daughter out all last winter (she was born 6 weeks prem in sept) out in her pram. Parked her outside stables whilst I mucked out and if the weather was really bad brought her in after excusing the ammonia smell to her!! It's not done her any harm, just made sure she was well wrapped up!

 

[Ottinmeg]

single parent -five kids - five horses - two dogs . oldest two horse mad, younger three couldn't care less! have a family come to ride the welsh A with 7 week old baby in tow, he has been on the pony a few times already

 

[vikkibeth]

To add to our madness of a five year old and a seven month of sons, 3 dogs and a youngster, I am half considering A new youngster he's very nice and very much a steal! Everyone thinks I am going mad haha.