Can’t agree with sister!

[Olderrider73]

So me and sister have discussed buying a horse between us but somehow we can’t seem to agree on one, what she wants and what I want are two different things. We’re both grown adults she 51 me 48, I suffer from depression and anxiety and to be honest horses keep me alive! She is dithering around wether to buy one with me or carry on sharing her friends horse and worried about upsetting her friend if she leaves, her friend is a serial yard hopper!! which annoys my sister. Where as me I want my own more than anything, got the finances, commitment and enthusiasm. I’ve seen a perfect 14.2 at a good price as we don’t won’t to spend silly money, it’s done everything I want it to do for myself and safe and sane, my sister seems to an off the track thoroughbred, I’d be happy with a thoughbred but one that’s already been trained but want I really really want is the 14.2 chunky cob that moves amazingly With plenty of life experience but my sister doesn’t want it because it’s only 14:2!!!! I feel sharing with my sister could be a nightmare, should I go it alone? I get the horse/pony I want and it’s suited to my ability?

 

[Goldenstar]

Go to alone .

 

[snowangel5]

If I was you definitely jump ship and get your own

 

[blitznbobs]

If you cant even agree what to buy how are you going to agree about the minutiae of horse owning?

 

[Squeak]

I would definitely go it alone. Once you've got it then she could do some sort of share with you but at least if it's officially yours then you have the last say.

 

[teddypops]

Go it alone if you have the means!

 

[MuddyMonster]

Go it alone if you can afford to.

It sounds like you have entirely different tastes and wants, so would make more sense.

 

[norolim]

I would say that you've answered your own question when you mentioned that you both want different things. It could get messy further down the line and end up becoming more of a pain than a pleasure!

If you've got the means to go it alone, I would definitely take the leap and do it. Hope it goes well for you, keep us posted ?

 

[poiuytrewq]

If you cant even agree what to buy how are you going to agree about the minutiae of horse owning?

This, having shared with my daughter I can vouch it can be incredibly annoying and argue inducing sharing a horse if you are not both 100% agreed on everything!

 

[piebaldproblems]

What if you go alone, buy alone, and maybe she can be involved later on as a sharer if she likes the horse?

 

[limestonelil]

No brainer to me, and everyone else by the other replies. ??

 

[Baywonder]

IMHO I would go it alone too. Owning a horse is supposed to be fun - and it doesn't sound like it would be if you co-owned with your sister.

If the two of you are arguing at this stage of potential horse ownership, I would imagine a few months down the line you would both be arrested for attempted murder! ?

 

[Arzada]

should I go it alone?

Yes

 

[LittleRolo]

Definitely buy by yourself

 

[The Irish Draft 2022]

Op if you can afford a horse and has decent budget to buy what you’re looking for in these crazy times definitely buy a horse yourself. It simply wouldn’t work out you want different things and to be honest it sounds to me you’re sister is happy sharing.

 

[AmyMay]

Go for the 14.2.

 

[Prancerpoos]

Go alone. Buying a horse with your sister will only lead to a lot more stress. If you can’t afford to go it alone then go without or you may end up with ridiculous levels of stress and fall out with your sister.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Have shared with sister it don't work get your own horse and enjoy ?

 

[Errin Paddywack]

My sister and I share a field and all the work with my sheep and our horses but no way would I share a horse with her.

 

[Snow Falcon]

No, I turned down my parents offer of sharing a pony with my sister. Different styles of riding would have led to conflict.

 

[Olderrider73]

Used to share pony when we were kids, she had all all the fun at pony camp and more riding, I was left mucking out while she went out hacking!!

 

[Olderrider73]

I would say that you've answered your own question when you mentioned that you both want different things. It could get messy further down the line and end up becoming more of a pain than a pleasure!

If you've got the means to go it alone, I would definitely take the leap and do it. Hope it goes well for you, keep us posted ?

Thanks will do x

 

[Melody Grey]

I think having autonomy over a horse is really important. What if the horse got sick or needed treatment and you couldn’t agree?

 

[ycbm]

Used to share pony when we were kids, she had all all the fun at pony camp and more riding, I was left mucking out while she went out hacking!!

And that's exactly what will happen this time around.

Don't do it!
.

 

[Toby_Zaphod]

I'm with the go it alone people. The worst thing about buying a horse between you is that as you both want to do different things you may well end up with a horse that does not do either of the wants well & you'll both become disillusioned. Decide on what you want & go for the horse you want. If you have the funds to do this it's got to be the better way. You can ride when you want, hack out when you want in fact you will be free to do whatever you like whenever you want to do so. Good Luck & I hope you find the horse you want sooner rather than later.

 

[ownedbyaconnie]

Go alone. If you’re bickering about what you want what happens when difficult decisions need to be made?

 

[Olderrider73]

What if you go alone, buy alone, and maybe she can be involved later on as a sharer if she likes the horse?

That’s what I’m thinking, she can be bossy my sister

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

My sister and I have always shared ownership of all our horses but since buying our 3rd, we have mostly ridden those most suited to our own particular type. She prefers the 'show pony' type that she got used to riding as a child, while I prefer something bigger and heavier. We always share the work.

 

[Olderrider73]

For well over a year I ve had to wait to get a horse now the time has come others like my sister and friend don’t seem to want me to have one all of my own, feel like I’m being controlled and it’s getting me so down

 

[cauda equina]

For well over a year I ve had to wait to get a horse now the time has come others like my sister and friend don’t seem to want me to have one all of my own, feel like I’m being controlled and it’s getting me so down

So don't let them control you, buy the horse you want