Coming here for a little bit of support - Today's the day PTS :(

[The wife]

Hi everyone,

Today is the day my big, beautiful, just 9yr old dressage horse is going to be PTS and my hand has been hovering over the phone for the last hour to cancel it.

I actually kind of don't know why I have come on here right now but I haven't actually got anywhere else to go without upsetting any members of the family - No-one wants this but money is tight right now and I simply cannot afford to pay for any treatment for him or livery bills through the winter on a horse who is lame on 3 legs.

I know it's the right thing. Some of you will have commented on my post a few months ago about him. He's hot headed, supremely talented, a panic 'runner', who I cannot keep sound behind and who has navicular in his fore legs. He is just about sound in front, after removing his shoes but remains lame behind. He had 18 months of field rest and came sound but after just 6 weeks of walk work he went lame behind again - then we noticed a creeping bi-lateral foreleg lameness and x-rays proved my gut right.

Ordinarily, i have no issues with having horses shot but this one is under my skin.

Why is life so unfair? Can someone up there give me a break right now?

Feel slightly better about venting. It's going to be OK isn't it.

 

[Sprat]

Didn't want to read and run - I'm so sorry for you. I have literally no helpful words of advice, and I think you have come to a very difficult decision.

Big hugs whatever you decide to do x

 

[milliepops]

it's going to be OK. I remember your posts about him earlier in the year. Life is so unkind, and unfair sometimes, but it will be OK. You've given him every chance to heal himself, and it's devastating that he hasn't been able to... some of them just can't. Keeping horses gives us the greatest joy, but also the biggest responsibilities. xxx

 

[scats]

So sorry xx

Im not familiar with your story but it sounds like are doing the right thing.

 

[Clodagh]

I am so sorry. I had my big boy done two weeks ago so I know where you are coming from. I was better once it was over, it was the time between decision and deed that made me sick.
Hugs.

 

[meleeka]

I will just say you will feel better once it's done. The relief of not having to worry about is anymore is immense. You constantly worry about the worst that can happen but when it does you'll get through it.

 

[ROMANY 1959]

I feel for you and am hoping you get through the day , there will be tears, sadness, but remember the good times... you have done the one thing you can do for your horse, et him rest in peace with no pain.. thinking of you..

 

[The wife]

I know I will feel better once it is done but it's this waiting time now. Husband is home this afternoon to 'deal with him', if I can't be around.

I have had a 5yr old done a few years back, who had lost his mind and had become dangerous in the field, let alone to ride and the relief once he had gone was unreal. I slept well for the first time in weeks the night after he had gone.

This one though opened so many doors. We had out first Horse & Hound magazine write-up on him, our first taste of winning numerous BD competitions and had so many hopes and dreams for him that he might have become something special.

I know this thinking is counter-productive. It's crap.

 

[southerncomfort]

I'm so sorry. Life is dreadfully unfair sometimes.

Will be thinking of you this afternoon. xxx

 

[Goldenstar]

I am so sorry it's an uniquely horrible experiance to go through but if it's any help its my experiance it's easier once it's done .

 

[GemG]

Poor you. You are doing the right thing and I would do the same if I were in your shoes.

 

[Sallyfinn]

I have nothing helpful to add but send big hugs x

 

[Cortez]

It is not just the right thing, it is the only thing you can do for your horse to let him out of a life of increasing pain and suffering that will only get unbearably worse. The last kindness you can offer.

 

[windand rain]

You will feel much better once it is over. It is the waiting that hurts. Take care of yourself you are doing the right thing. I was friend at the end for a much loved pony recently she was so stoic she was jumping and galloping about the week before so no one could understand the decision but mild lameness in one fore leg on x ray showed severe changes in all four legs. The vets comment on seeing them was "any other horse would be on it back with its feet in the air". It was sad but right she must have been in agony. Your boy will be free from pain and as he has no concept of future will be happy to the end and without fear

 

[TuscanBunnyGirl]

Cortez has worded it perfectly. I'm so so sorry for you, its heartbreaking. It will be for a few days probably but don't beat yourself up because you ARE doing the right thing, and sooner than you think you will feel a million times better for making this decision. Sending you hugs xx

 

[Equi]

Think of things another way - he's done what most people only dream of and you can have those wonderful memories for a lifetime. He is now in pain and rather than just sticking him in a field to deal with it himself, you are taking control and making sure his life is not in vain. There are so many horses who just plod about until they die because the owners can't face the fact they are in pain. Winters hard enough without soreness. You should be incredibly proud of what you have achieved with this lovely horse, and what you are doing for him now. Don't forget, a vet won't put down a perfect horse for kicks - if they agree to it they are agreeing that it is necessary.

Have a good cuddle, have a good cry and then breathe.

 

[ycbm]

You're doing the right thing for all of you. I hope it goes smoothly.

 

[Slightlyconfused]

it's going to be OK. I remember your posts about him earlier in the year. Life is so unkind, and unfair sometimes, but it will be OK. You've given him every chance to heal himself, and it's devastating that he hasn't been able to... some of them just can't. Keeping horses gives us the greatest joy, but also the biggest responsibilities. xxx

Agree with this.

Sending hugs. Xxx

 

[Sprout]

My thoughts are with you - I know the waiting is the worst, afterwards you can find peace of mind knowing you have done the right thing. Xx

 

[Asha]

I'm so sorry for you, but it does sound like you are doing the absolute best by your boy. Hang on to your memories , all the best for this afternoon. Will be thinking of you

 

[luckyoldme]

I feel for you having to make such a tough call.
There are people out there who would think nothing of filling full of bute and selling him on, Its only tough because you care so much.
A 9 year old permanently lame horse doesn t really have any good options open to him, pts is the best of a bad bunch of options.

 

[mytwofriends]

You're doing the right thing. He'll know nothing, he'll be in no more pain and you will eventually come to terms with the fact you absolutely did what was best for him.

Hugs for today, and RIP to your dear friend.

 

[Emma_H]

We are so lucky we can give this kindness back to our animals.

You are doing the right thing for him and even though it hurts like hell for you, your pain will pass with time.

Hugs to you, look after yourself today xxxx

 

[claracanter]

I am not familiar with your story but it sounds heart breaking.You are doing the right thing and have made a very brave unselfish decision for the horse. Big hugs.

 

[Dazed'n'confused]

Think of things another way - he's done what most people only dream of and you can have those wonderful memories for a lifetime. He is now in pain and rather than just sticking him in a field to deal with it himself, you are taking control and making sure his life is not in vain. There are so many horses who just plod about until they die because the owners can't face the fact they are in pain. Winters hard enough without soreness. You should be incredibly proud of what you have achieved with this lovely horse, and what you are doing for him now. Don't forget, a vet won't put down a perfect horse for kicks - if they agree to it they are agreeing that it is necessary.

Have a good cuddle, have a good cry and then breathe.

This just made me fill up! So true...

OP, you are doing the right thing for your boy, it's the hardest thing for you though..
I've had a few pts over the years, it never gets any easier despite the fact that we know it's the right decision & relief that their suffering is over will follow.
Sending hugs X

 

[The wife]

I have just watched Supervet from last night and feeling much better about a quote he said (I don't agree with all the procedures he does but liked this one):

The greatest gift for you is the length of his life
The greatest gift for him is quality of life.

Thank you everyone for your kind words. Feeling quite overwhelmed but more at peace about it a little more now.

He's a horse that due to his temperament could have been very easily abused and thrashed but having had him since a 4yr old as an unruly teenager, I do take peace he has only known kindness, patience and understanding in that time.

 

[Clare85]

I'm so sorry. You are making a brave decision with your boy's welfare at the forefront of your mind. They always break our hearts. Sending strength and hugs xx

 

[Bens_Mum]

I've lost two this year. One in a similar situation last Friday. I nearly called mine off too but it was the right thing and the sense of relief after huge. They don't have a clue at all its one minute eating the next nothing. Its not like us or a human waiting to go you are putting them at peace honestly. Be kind to yourself.

 

[MrsMozart]

No wise words, but sending supportive thoughts.

I bought a horse from a deadend sales. He was gorgeous. Put to sleep a year later when the lameness that snuck up couldn't be fixed no matter what we did, there was no way to fix him. I thought he was going to be the one to heal my heart after losing the Dizz. I thought it was going to be one of those good-luck-happy-ever-after stories. It wasn't to be. He had a good year with us. He was loved and looked after and taken care of. His gentle whinny when he heard my footsteps will remain with me. He went before he got the stage where he could no longer run with the others. It was totally the right thing. It still hurt like... Now I'm just pleased I knew him and that he didn't end up being passed back through the market.

It will be hard. There will be times when you're fine and times when you hurt. Know that we're here for you.

 

[smja]

You're being brave enough to do the right thing for him. You have my sympathies, and my respect.