ChesnutsRoasting
Well-Known Member
Where is the pony, OP? If in East Anglia, I'd be happy to pose as a completely novice horsey lover to get your girl back. I can blag with the best of them if necessary.
complete mistake in gifting a horse
- Thread starter Jaymarie
- Start date
Where is the pony, OP? If in East Anglia, I'd be happy to pose as a completely novice horsey lover to get your girl back. I can blag with the best of them if necessary.
Micropony
Well-Known Member
Hmmm, I’m finding this thread rather interesting. We’re all horsey people, so judgemental is in our genes, but I have a slightly different perspective on this “never pass on a horse with issues”.
I bought my first horse, big 17.1 WB, for £1. His previous owner, who was even more inexperienced than me, had bought him from a dodgy dealer and within 6 weeks it was crystal clear that he wasn’t suitable for her or the job she’d bought him for. He was a shiverer in front, and someone had clearly beaten the c*@p out of him for it at some stage, so picking his front feet out was a 45 minute job for the first few months – he was terrified. It got easier with time and patience, but was never straightforward. When I first met him, he could be riggy, and once injured someone pretty badly in a violent disagreement with another gelding over a flirty mare. He was 2/10 lame when I first met him due to a mysterious collateral elbow ligament injury that, once diagnosed, was easily enough fixed. Because of the shivers, he needed to be sedated for the farrier every 5 weeks, and I mean i/v sedation because he was also difficult to worm so there was no way you were getting anywhere near him with sedalin or domosedan. His feet were rubbish, he had navicular, and over his lifetime I spent eye-watering sums on remedial farriery to keep him comfortable. Managing him was all about keeping his shoes on – he was crippled without front shoes, and we’re on heavy clay round here, so that was no mean feat.
Under saddle, he wasn’t straightforward either. He had some proper fancy dressage breeding, and his movement was so big (and unbalanced) he had been known to simply trot unwary people off, and I don’t mean rank novices. It took me 4 years to get his enormous canter to a stage where I could canter him large round the school. Eventually managing over 65% in unaffiliated Novice felt like the most amazing achievement in the world! He could be really spooky, especially in the early days – he’d spook if he was frightened and he’d spook if he was bored and wanted to entertain himself. When I first met him he was also nappy. For the last couple of years, however, he was about as bombproof on the roads as anything I’ve ever ridden as long as he was with others, but he couldn’t safely be hacked alone. I was also told he could rear, although to be fair to him the only time he reared with me turned out to be due to discomfort as he’d changed shape and needed the saddler ahead of schedule. If you became unbalanced on him, easy to do on something that big moving and spooky, it really frightened him and he dropped you. He didn’t often buck, but he had it in him and he could do massive theatrical ones where you didn’t move in the saddle (as long as you were sitting up properly), or really pathetic embarrassing ones that were totally unsittable. That was something else that happened less and less frequently after I’d had him a while. He was never sharp, but could be a real thug when he was in one of his moods, and if you gave him two consecutive days off work then you did so at your own risk. Basically, he needed an extremely competent high level dressage rider, but wasn’t good enough for that sort of a rider to be vaguely interested, so he was stuck with me.
I’ve made him sound like a nightmare. He wasn’t. He didn’t have a mean bone in his body. But he was exactly the kind of horse that lots of people would have advised his previous owner to PTS rather than pass on because he wasn’t straightforward to ride and had a whole range of health and management issues. I loved the bones of him, and I’m grateful for every day of the nearly six years I had with him. It really shouldn’t have worked out, and I would freely admit that really he was completely unsuitable as a first horse, although at the time I really didn’t understand what I was taking on. I’m sure there are plenty of people on here who could have looked after and ridden him better than I did, but I loved that horse and did my absolute best by him. He got the very best I could find for him by way of farriery, veterinary care, comfortable tack, dentistry, bodywork, training (for us both), varied and appropriate work (within the limits of my riding ability!) and general feeding, management and routine. He became a really happy boy, he loved his life, he loved his turnout buddy and he was (if I do say so myself) absolutely devoted to me. So it is possible to give a “problem” horse away and for it to be loved and cared for the rest of its life like my boy was.
My good friend’s horse – an ex-racer who frightened the living daylights out of his previous owner – was given to her, and he’s living the life of Riley. Before I got my big boy, I shared a horse, and he’d also been given to his owner by someone who’d had a bad accident on him and couldn’t bear to look at him again afterwards. He is still with her, sound, loved, impeccably looked after and in work, in his mid-20s, and she’ll never part with him.
Would I have given my big boy away if I’d have found myself in a position where I could no longer keep him (lost my job, say)? No, I wouldn’t if I’m being honest, I’d have PTS rather than take the risk. That probably sounds really arrogant – if a numpty like me could manage then what’s to say someone else couldn’t do just as well if not better for him? But I wouldn’t have gambled on someone wanting to. However I’m incredibly glad his previous owner didn’t have the same view and gave him to me instead.
Sorry that ended up far long than I intended. My point is that I do understand why the OP might have made the call to try and find a loving home for her mare. It could have worked out differently. Unfortunately it didn’t. Just really hope she manages to get the mare back so she can see out her days happily.
I bought my first horse, big 17.1 WB, for £1. His previous owner, who was even more inexperienced than me, had bought him from a dodgy dealer and within 6 weeks it was crystal clear that he wasn’t suitable for her or the job she’d bought him for. He was a shiverer in front, and someone had clearly beaten the c*@p out of him for it at some stage, so picking his front feet out was a 45 minute job for the first few months – he was terrified. It got easier with time and patience, but was never straightforward. When I first met him, he could be riggy, and once injured someone pretty badly in a violent disagreement with another gelding over a flirty mare. He was 2/10 lame when I first met him due to a mysterious collateral elbow ligament injury that, once diagnosed, was easily enough fixed. Because of the shivers, he needed to be sedated for the farrier every 5 weeks, and I mean i/v sedation because he was also difficult to worm so there was no way you were getting anywhere near him with sedalin or domosedan. His feet were rubbish, he had navicular, and over his lifetime I spent eye-watering sums on remedial farriery to keep him comfortable. Managing him was all about keeping his shoes on – he was crippled without front shoes, and we’re on heavy clay round here, so that was no mean feat.
Under saddle, he wasn’t straightforward either. He had some proper fancy dressage breeding, and his movement was so big (and unbalanced) he had been known to simply trot unwary people off, and I don’t mean rank novices. It took me 4 years to get his enormous canter to a stage where I could canter him large round the school. Eventually managing over 65% in unaffiliated Novice felt like the most amazing achievement in the world! He could be really spooky, especially in the early days – he’d spook if he was frightened and he’d spook if he was bored and wanted to entertain himself. When I first met him he was also nappy. For the last couple of years, however, he was about as bombproof on the roads as anything I’ve ever ridden as long as he was with others, but he couldn’t safely be hacked alone. I was also told he could rear, although to be fair to him the only time he reared with me turned out to be due to discomfort as he’d changed shape and needed the saddler ahead of schedule. If you became unbalanced on him, easy to do on something that big moving and spooky, it really frightened him and he dropped you. He didn’t often buck, but he had it in him and he could do massive theatrical ones where you didn’t move in the saddle (as long as you were sitting up properly), or really pathetic embarrassing ones that were totally unsittable. That was something else that happened less and less frequently after I’d had him a while. He was never sharp, but could be a real thug when he was in one of his moods, and if you gave him two consecutive days off work then you did so at your own risk. Basically, he needed an extremely competent high level dressage rider, but wasn’t good enough for that sort of a rider to be vaguely interested, so he was stuck with me.
I’ve made him sound like a nightmare. He wasn’t. He didn’t have a mean bone in his body. But he was exactly the kind of horse that lots of people would have advised his previous owner to PTS rather than pass on because he wasn’t straightforward to ride and had a whole range of health and management issues. I loved the bones of him, and I’m grateful for every day of the nearly six years I had with him. It really shouldn’t have worked out, and I would freely admit that really he was completely unsuitable as a first horse, although at the time I really didn’t understand what I was taking on. I’m sure there are plenty of people on here who could have looked after and ridden him better than I did, but I loved that horse and did my absolute best by him. He got the very best I could find for him by way of farriery, veterinary care, comfortable tack, dentistry, bodywork, training (for us both), varied and appropriate work (within the limits of my riding ability!) and general feeding, management and routine. He became a really happy boy, he loved his life, he loved his turnout buddy and he was (if I do say so myself) absolutely devoted to me. So it is possible to give a “problem” horse away and for it to be loved and cared for the rest of its life like my boy was.
My good friend’s horse – an ex-racer who frightened the living daylights out of his previous owner – was given to her, and he’s living the life of Riley. Before I got my big boy, I shared a horse, and he’d also been given to his owner by someone who’d had a bad accident on him and couldn’t bear to look at him again afterwards. He is still with her, sound, loved, impeccably looked after and in work, in his mid-20s, and she’ll never part with him.
Would I have given my big boy away if I’d have found myself in a position where I could no longer keep him (lost my job, say)? No, I wouldn’t if I’m being honest, I’d have PTS rather than take the risk. That probably sounds really arrogant – if a numpty like me could manage then what’s to say someone else couldn’t do just as well if not better for him? But I wouldn’t have gambled on someone wanting to. However I’m incredibly glad his previous owner didn’t have the same view and gave him to me instead.
Sorry that ended up far long than I intended. My point is that I do understand why the OP might have made the call to try and find a loving home for her mare. It could have worked out differently. Unfortunately it didn’t. Just really hope she manages to get the mare back so she can see out her days happily.
WelshD
Well-Known Member
I'm going to have people come down on me like a ton of bricks for this but..
You gave the pony away because effectively you had no use for her so if you get her back she still has no use to you. When the depths of winter hit and you are dealing with another equine (and she isnt a small light footed companion pony) will you start wondering if it was wise to take on another equine?
What I am trying to say is if you want her back make sure its for the right reasons and not because you don't particularly want her but you don't want someone else to have her either (been there...) do make sure it is in a genuine attempt to secure the mare's future
In my case I sat on my hands (rightly or wrongly) and the pony ended up in a great home where he is doing well, been turned around and has a bright future but i will admit he was one of the lucky ones
You gave the pony away because effectively you had no use for her so if you get her back she still has no use to you. When the depths of winter hit and you are dealing with another equine (and she isnt a small light footed companion pony) will you start wondering if it was wise to take on another equine?
What I am trying to say is if you want her back make sure its for the right reasons and not because you don't particularly want her but you don't want someone else to have her either (been there...) do make sure it is in a genuine attempt to secure the mare's future
In my case I sat on my hands (rightly or wrongly) and the pony ended up in a great home where he is doing well, been turned around and has a bright future but i will admit he was one of the lucky ones
canteron
Well-Known Member
I think that Shills mistake here wasn't making her point, generically it has a lot of validity, but making it 2 or 3 times over, when it started to look a bit personal and bitchy?
ester
Not slacking multitasking
Hardly, she only posted twice, the second time to respond to specific points that the OP had brought up.
MagicMelon
Well-Known Member
What is an issue to one person, may not be an issue to someone else. I wouldn't take on a bucker but I know someone who doesn't seem to be phased by serious buckers. OP told the person she gave him to what he did and the person accepted that.
canteron
Well-Known Member
Three times actually - but that is only relevant if accuracy is important before making judgemental statements.
rowan666
Well-Known Member
Any update OP?
Jaymarie
Active Member
She's back!
Well I don't think I can put into words what a day I have had. Horrible people, and it is a very different little horse to the one I saw 18 months ago. But relief doesn't cover it!
People are still dwelling on this "use" thing. I didn't move Dora on through lack of money or time etc. I moved her on because I thought she'd enjoy a ridden career which I couldn't give her. Yes she would rear occasionally but some people aren't phased by that. Anyway she clearly doesn't enjoy/isn't suitable for being ridden so I'm more than happy to have her as a companion. Nobody needs to worry about my financial situation "making it through the winter" I am very financially stable and own a good deal of land. I could be Ricka fella and still unhappy about paying 400 pounds for a pony that was 50 a week ago.
Which she now is! Took 3.5 hours to load her (something she was fantastic for when I had her) and after a lot of drama, 6 people and something I can only describe as a scene from Jurassic park she was loaded (poor hubby's hand was practically skinned at one point). When she started playing up loading (which they tell me took 2 hours when fetching her from the friend I gave her to) I could probably have said ****** this I'm not giving you 400, however they started mentioning the knacker man who only lives 2 miles away. And some people may think that's where she should have gone.
But seeing how neurotic she was when we arrived/loaded her, and how she instantly chilled when we got home was amazing. And having seen where she came from makes it all the more satisfying. She has already settled and seems to have taken the position of mothering the youngsters.
Thrilled doesn't cover it! Thanks so much for the supportive comments and would love to share some pics but would have no idea how!
Well I don't think I can put into words what a day I have had. Horrible people, and it is a very different little horse to the one I saw 18 months ago. But relief doesn't cover it!
People are still dwelling on this "use" thing. I didn't move Dora on through lack of money or time etc. I moved her on because I thought she'd enjoy a ridden career which I couldn't give her. Yes she would rear occasionally but some people aren't phased by that. Anyway she clearly doesn't enjoy/isn't suitable for being ridden so I'm more than happy to have her as a companion. Nobody needs to worry about my financial situation "making it through the winter" I am very financially stable and own a good deal of land. I could be Ricka fella and still unhappy about paying 400 pounds for a pony that was 50 a week ago.
Which she now is! Took 3.5 hours to load her (something she was fantastic for when I had her) and after a lot of drama, 6 people and something I can only describe as a scene from Jurassic park she was loaded (poor hubby's hand was practically skinned at one point). When she started playing up loading (which they tell me took 2 hours when fetching her from the friend I gave her to) I could probably have said ****** this I'm not giving you 400, however they started mentioning the knacker man who only lives 2 miles away. And some people may think that's where she should have gone.
But seeing how neurotic she was when we arrived/loaded her, and how she instantly chilled when we got home was amazing. And having seen where she came from makes it all the more satisfying. She has already settled and seems to have taken the position of mothering the youngsters.
Thrilled doesn't cover it! Thanks so much for the supportive comments and would love to share some pics but would have no idea how!
Meowy Catkin
Meow!
Phew! I'm so glad that she's back home. 
CinnamonChristmasCookie
Fais pas chier!
Really good you got her back.
Exploding Chestnuts
Well-Known Member
Pleased for both of you.
lewis2015
Well-Known Member
Am so glad you got her back Well done.
Well done.
Maesfen
Extremely Old Nag!
Good news, pleased for both of you.
OldNag
Wasting my time successfully....
Sounds like a happy ending
Princess16
Well-Known Member
Fantastic news ! So pleased for you and her 
Adopter
Well-Known Member
So nice to read this post has a happy ending for the mare, if she is looking after your youngsters she has a role! Lovely news.
silv
Well-Known Member
Fantastic, hope you have a long and happy time together.
jrp204
Well-Known Member
Well done, glad it worked out.
Micropony
Well-Known Member
Great news! So pleased for you both x
Equi
Well-Known Member
Glad she's back. Don't let her go agin!
MrsNorris
Well-Known Member
Well done you, how lovely to read about someone who is committed to doing the right thing by the horse. Many would have just left her to her fate, I take my hat off to you..
Clodagh
Playing chess with pigeons
I'm so pleased for her and you.
rowan666
Well-Known Member
oh thats fantastic news
touchstone
Well-Known Member
Glad to hear she's back home.
RubysGold
Well-Known Member
Oh I'm so pleased to hear that you got her back :-D
Would love to see pictures
Would love to see pictures
canteron
Well-Known Member
Really pleased for you all and so sorry about the less generous souls on HHO but delighted you proved them all wrong.
HBB
Well-Known Member
Fantastic news, so pleased for you both.
luckyoldme
Well-Known Member
read this thread with interest.
Im so glad she is back with you and would love to see some pictures.
Ive got a no value horse, bought from a dodgy dealer 6 years ago for a lot of money by myself a silly middle aged fool. This far down the line i can honestly say that it is the best thing i ever did, in ways i could never have imagined all those years ago.
I hope that this little lady surprises you and repays you in the way my horse did......sometimes the best descisions come from the heart and defy all rational logic!
good luck to you bothl
Im so glad she is back with you and would love to see some pictures.
Ive got a no value horse, bought from a dodgy dealer 6 years ago for a lot of money by myself a silly middle aged fool. This far down the line i can honestly say that it is the best thing i ever did, in ways i could never have imagined all those years ago.
I hope that this little lady surprises you and repays you in the way my horse did......sometimes the best descisions come from the heart and defy all rational logic!
good luck to you bothl
smellsofhorse
Well-Known Member
Firstly, I know you won't want to hear it.
Why did you sell her?
A loan would have been safer.
Or just keep her as a pet, she wont care if she isn't ridden!
Has she has a vet look carefully at her?
Could there be medical issues?
Has she has decent schooling and groundwork?
Or just people giving it a try?
I'd say stump up and get ger back.
But it depends how you feel about her.
You let her go in the first place, free which always causes issues.
Would you have wanted her back if you hadn't lost the foal and seen the mares advert?
Or do you just want her because she is there?
Why did you sell her?
A loan would have been safer.
Or just keep her as a pet, she wont care if she isn't ridden!
Has she has a vet look carefully at her?
Could there be medical issues?
Has she has decent schooling and groundwork?
Or just people giving it a try?
I'd say stump up and get ger back.
But it depends how you feel about her.
You let her go in the first place, free which always causes issues.
Would you have wanted her back if you hadn't lost the foal and seen the mares advert?
Or do you just want her because she is there?