Deleting social media

[teddy_]

Good morning HHO,

I have recently deactivated my Facebook profile and Instagram account (kept Pinterest though, too many good ideas and lovely photos).

Has anyone else on here taken the plunge and done the same? I simply woke up one morning last week and asked myself who my audience was (i.e. do the majority of these people actually care about my antics and photos of my horse) and what value did these two platforms add to my life?

I acknowledge Facebook, especially, is an excellent platform for horse related things such as buying and selling of equipment (not horses!) and amazing groups such as "sh*teventersunite". I also acknowledge it can be an amazing force for good.

However, both platforms in some cases, have an undeniable harmful effect on peoples' lives. Facebook has been allowed to penetrate into every facet of our reality from pushing advertisements into your News Feed based on your browsing history to actually tracking where you are (granted, not compulsory) and maybe most importantly, making some individuals feel as though their life isn't as 'cool' as someone's who they might barely know. Then in the meantime, Instagram is force feeding users completely unrealistic and unattainable standards and lifestyles which again, can lead to feelings of inadequacy.

Now this post isn't aimed at bashing social media (the above points were merely what drove my decision to quit), I think people should make their own mind up on that however, I would be interested to know if any other HHO users have done the same and what effect it had on them? Did you go back? Did you wonder why you ever had it in the first place? Did you feel like you were missing out? So on, so forth.

I just want to add, I am not a business owner and I understand that both platforms are potentially invaluable in this day and age if you are.

Thank you!

 

[MuddyMonster]

No, but in recent years I've significantly cut down my SM.

I don't use Instagram anyway so I only use FB. I don't really post much myself and had a big cut down of people I had as friends - some I'd not spoken to in years & years. I do still need to have an account as the yard & dog training all run through a FB group. I find it useful to have out about local clinics and rides coming up too - so not quite ready to cut myself off completely

I turned all my notifications off years ago though & I was the best thing I did!

 

[HappyHollyDays]

I have Facebook because all riding club activities are on it and it’s a good way to stay in touch with the great group of friends I’ve made on here. I’m on a few sensible EMS, Laminitis and Barefoot pages via my Farrier but other than that it’s fairly well locked down and I rarely post anything on my timeline because that’s not what I have it for.

As soon as I get adverts I report them as Spam and they soon stop appearing on my newsfeed because I’m no prepared to allow them to dictate to me. It should be about choice and I use it to my advantage rather than their agenda. People aren’t forced to look at things they don’t want but as most people can’t seem to differentiate between real life and fantasy they get sucked in.

 

[Rowreach]

Not an answer to your question, but isn't HHO social media?

 

[teddy_]

Not an answer to your question, but isn't HHO social media?

I am sure there is a blurred line between forums and social media but in my mind, HHO is basically anonymous (if you want it to be).

 

[Winters100]

I deactivated FB some years ago. At the time I did it to prove to the children that one could actually have a life without it, but actually I found that I did not miss it at all, so have never gone back to it.

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I cannot imagine why anyone would post their doings over the internet for all to see and identify, so no I haven't deleted mine because the only SM that I have is HHO and Pinterest but that is equally anonymousi, in my case.

 

[Petmurf]

Funnily enough I unfriended everyone on Fb last night with the exception of my family so I’m now down to about 20 friends, I also deleted all the groups except for 3 that I’m actively involved with. FB was getting on my nerves and I spent way to much time on it reading rubbish, I’m on IG but rare post anything.

 

[teddy_]

I cannot imagine why anyone would post their doings over the internet for all to see and identify, so no I haven't deleted mine because the only SM that I have is HHO and Pinterest but that is equally anonymousi, in my case.

Agreed, this is partly why I deleted mine as the only things I would post were photos of the horses and was frankly fed up of having every aspect of other peoples' lives beamed onto my screen.

 

[Rowreach]

I don't post much on Facebook, I'm sure nobody is that interested in my daily doings, but I enjoy seeing stuff that others post, and my newsfeed would be practically dead if it wasn't for a couple of people (you know who you are ?) whose posts are my main form of entertainment.

I will confess to occasionally posting something (yesterday) that is a huge two fingered salute to a number of people that it will get back to, as well as being something I'm very proud of.

Used carefully SM is great.

 

[Bernster]

Only on Facebook. The ads are annoying and the impact it’s having on people is disturbing but I feel like the genie is out of the bottle so I’m not sure its possible to row back from that. Where it takes us is not clear to me but there may need to be more regulation and oversight, which is very tricky to manage with freedom of speech etc.

I use it like a diary and photo book, and to keep up with friends that I don’t see as often. I’m old enough not to worry too much about comparing myself to others and on the whole I find it a positive thing.

ETA I also check and edit the privacy settings.

 

[Cortez]

I use Facebook for amusement and discussion on things that interest me. Over the lockdowns I found it was pretty much the only contact I had with the outside world, but I don’t post any pictures or “doings”. I like a good debate and follow politics and world affairs. I have no desire to join Instagram, Twitter or any of the more inane platforms. The loss of any concept of privacy worries me.

 

[SussexbytheXmasTree]

I like Facebook and I’m not sure how you get to know about things without it these days. All riding club stuff and horsey events are on there, everything that goes on in the village Etc. I simply don’t have people I don’t like on it and don’t engage with controversial topics whenever possible. It’s easy enough to block, hide or unfollow people who annoy me.

I really don’t get people who can’t cope with it.

 

[teddy_]

I like Facebook and I’m not sure how you get to know about things without it these days. All riding club stuff and horsey events are on there, everything that goes on in the village Etc. I simply don’t have people I don’t like on it and don’t engage with controversial topics whenever possible. It’s easy enough to block, hide or unfollow people who annoy me.

I really don’t get people who can’t cope with it.

I suppose for me it's not about 'can't cope with it' but more, just realising it does not add value to my life however, I understand that is simply not the case for many. I am not someone that uses it for groups etc. so, I may feel differently if that was the case . Heck, I might even find next season that I am missing competitions etc. due to lack of Facebook and have to 'reactivate'! I hope not, though.

 

[SillySally]

There's lots I don't like about Facebook, and I rarely post on it myself anyway, but I do find it so useful. I have lots of friends on there that I don't get chance to see much (or any!) of, and if I deleted it then it would be like deleting an address book in a way. Plus I do use it for fun - lots of groups and pages and things that make me laugh. Maybe I don't use it much for what it was intended for, but I'd be loathe to give it up.

I actually use all the others much less - I'm too old to TikTok or snapchat I think, whatever they are!

 

[smolmaus]

My FB is for following horsey groups, I only ever share posts from the rescue so I imagine I am hidden by a lot of people ? but it helps their algorithm!

Insta I very rarely post on but it's nice to have photos recorded for myself. This is the one I have to be careful with, I used to follow a lot of like "Health and weightloss" influencers when I was struggling with my food issues and sometimes they still pop up and have to be banished but I've found body-positive and body-neutral accounts helpful in the past so swings and roundabouts.

Twitter is for stupid memes. Tiktok had me for a few months, also for stupid memes, but the shine has gone off it. I don't really post, I just consume.

 

[southerncomfort]

I've only ever been on FB. I did cull my friends list a couple of years ago so that it is only people I actually know in real life.

I have rellies in Northern Ireland, Spain and Australia so it's a good way to keep up with their lives. Also, I live in a very rural area and felt quite lonely for the first year or so of living here so FB really helped me.

However, I'm quick to unfollow anything that makes me feel uncomfortable and to unfriend people if I realise we no longer have anything in common.

We have banned Instagram from the house (you can set your router to ban it) after youngest daughter became very depressed and began self harming. She also later confided that within days of joining she was inundated with messages from men asking for pictures.

I genuinely think Instagram should be shut down until they start taking better care of their younger users.

 

[Peglo]

I like Facebook for old pictures from years ago that’s not on me phone anymore and memories etc. But now I hardly post on it so I will miss all the fun things I’ve done in years to come. I don’t really like posting anymore. It was making me feel a bit odd, I wanted to post an achievement but then worried it just sounded like bragging, worried of being judged if I posted a picture etc. So I don’t share much.
I mostly keep to myself now and tag my sister in funny posts, memes or videos and keep up with friends so I will keep it but will take a break if I start to feel negatively.

 

[Jenko109]

I cut my friends list right down to 45 friends, restricted my profile and very rarely post on it.

Privacy is everything.

 

[Rowreach]

Sometimes I think people don't realise it's within their control as to how their sm is used. You can call yourself anything you like, you can friend/unfriend/block anyone you like, you can have "restricted" friends so they only see bits of what you post, or you can restrict how much of their stuff you see (I have a couple of people on FB that I need to keep for a few reasons, but I can't cope with their politics or dubious views on, say, BLM, MeToo, stuff like that).

You can belong to groups and not post on them, or not join them in the first place, or leave them if they're not for you.

I love that I'm in contact with my two 90 year old uncles via FB, and with friends from around the globe, some I've not seen in decades but I interact with daily.

Equally, it's handy for keeping up with what's going on right outside the door in our village.

I'm sure I "could" live without it, I used to after all, but I'd sure miss it.

 

[I'm Dun]

I love Facebook! All my horses have come via FB in one form or another. And tbh all of my friends really. Theres a couple I didnt meet there but I now maintain friendships through FB.

Its a handy place to ask stupid questions. I've never yet had people not know the answer. I can keep up with local stuff and well as worldwide politics. I like all sorts of things, from dinosaurs to campervans, so Fb is ideal to dip in and out of.

I also refurbed and furnished about 75% of my boat from friends of FB dontating goods, freecycle and marketplace. Someone I only know through FB and here actually lent me a significant sum of money to buy the boat in the first place. Another person I have never met and only know via FB, lent me a much smaller sum of money when I needed it.

Ive been at the receiving end of a very vicious attack on there which ended up with the police involved. But thats a people problem really not a social media problem, For me the good far far outweighs the bad.

Instagram I dont like at all. I feel really really uncomfortable that young women are exposed to heavily airbrushed and sexualised photos as if its the norm. But that might just be me being middle aged an out of touch

 

[Mrs. Jingle]

My online business was very much Facebook based especially in the early days and it was very successful in reaching my target audience. When I closed the business last year after my accident I unfriended absolutely anyone I did not know personally and tightened up my privacy settings.

It is now much quieter on my page thank goodness and I only connect with family and friends of my choice.

Instagram and Twitter leave me feeling very bewildered and old so I rarely go on there.

I have to say though I found both my labs and my main riding horse through FB so it has had some huge benefit to me, but that was through my business page which no longer exists.

 

[milliepops]

the latest 2 Behind The Bastards podcasts were about FB including some super depressing stats about what use of instagram is doing to young peoples MH. And how the algorithms on FB mean that garbage information gets shared disproportionately compared to general stuff.
So that's concerning.

That said i agree with Rowreach, it is what you make it - i cull stuff that is negative and use it mainly for keeping up with friends, buying and selling and as a bit of a horse diary, i would never bother to write stuff down but I like the way FB memories digs stuff up and reminds me of little events i chose to note.

i could delete it, but I don't want to, because for me it's really only positive.

 

[deb_l222]

Let's face it, all social media is fine but you have to keep it in its place. If you get lured into thinking people are living fantastically brilliant lives because of what they post, then jealousy might just eat you up and that's never a good thing.

I think you also need to be fully aware of what you're posting. Just remember, there is no such thing as fully deleting social media. Once it's posted, it's there for life!! I have a friend who has a son who is severely autistic and she posts every minute detail of his daily life on Facebook. What she forgets is, when her son grows up and is hopefully living as an independent adult, anyone will be able to google his name and read all the stuff his mother wrote about him as a child. He will have no control over that and I find it very sad.

I'm of the pre-computer generation so remember what it was like NOT to have a phone and to actually go out and play but members of my family have suffered severe anxiety and stress over social media and trying to keep up with the new breed of airbrushed celebrity.

Like I say, it's a good tool but has to be kept in its place. If it becomes toxic or harmful, bin it off

 

[SussexbytheXmasTree]

I think if social media had been a thing when I was a child/ teenager I could well see that it would have had a seriously bad effect on my mental health. I was not at all confident and had very low self-esteem and a negative body image as it was without having to see myself all over social media.

 

[stangs]

I used to have two instagram accounts, and one FB account.

The FB account was completely anonymous, fake name, no photos, only used it to have a quick glance on certain private facebook groups. I ended up getting rid of it because I'm paranoid about how much data FB might be collecting about me. Ideally, I'd like to get rid of WhatsApp too but currently can't as need it to be part of certain group chats.

Instagram wise, one account was for keeping up with friends (but was otherwise anonymous, no name, no photos) and one was for keeping up with the R+ etc horse community, also anonymous but I posted a few pictures of horses every once in a while. I've temporarily deactivated them both as it's so easy to waste time scrolling, and again the data issue, but can't say they've ever affected my self esteem. Occasionally, I log back into them largely because I'm nosey and there's some good educational stuff posted by the R+ community. But I'm happy without them and with this as my main 'social media'.

What I will say is it's scary how personal social media has become. These days its the norm to have a public account with pictures of yourself and your name as the username (for instagram or tiktok). What happened to the days of "never divulge personal information"?

 

[Velcrobum]

I have a FB account because the yard my oldie is on uses a private FB group to communicate. Am on here and another horsey forum but with a pseudo name on both. As I have complete computer illiteracy no photos of ponies or me appear publicly.

 

[PurBee]

I had a fb account started over 10yrs ago, with only a few friends from real life on it at first. A friend stayed at my place for a weekend and the following week photo’s of me and my home were posted on her page and tagging my fb page! She had hundreds of ‘friends’ - had been on fb for a while.

I was peeved she didnt even ask if it was ok to post personal pics of me or my home - i realised then social media is in truth, anti-social in some ways and invasive and promptly deleted my account, and never bothered since.

Its fine if people choose to post their own life on SM, its up to them isnt it! But to post everything you do that involves other people and ‘tag’ them, without them knowing, is an invasion of privacy.

I use SM in a way where its mutually beneficial - like this forum, ask others experience and their viewpoint and give help/ideas if i can. Forums epitomise the usefulness of SM imo, theyre mostly geared towards sharing about a mutual interest.

 

[PurBee]

SM for business is useful - networking within your industry with others etc.

 

[The Xmas Furry]

I use here - and faceache.
I mostly use faceache to keep up with far flung family and friends worldwide, plus also local RC activities, a couple of interesting (to me) groups, a breed society group as well as the village group and yes, I post photos on there. I like the memories and check them daily tho some are bitter sweet and others make me smile.
I have a good bunch of friends on there, including a good number from here who have become firm friends over the years

I don't use insta-thingy or anything else.