Do I give up? Buy another? Share?

[Barklands]

I decided to pack it all in a couple of years ago after falling out of love with it all under similar circumstances to yours but within 3 months I was itching to ride again and was asked to take the ride of two horses belonging to a former pupil. Training a young horse who loved his job reminded me why I love it so much and here I am with 5 of my own again. Wanting to give up is okay, giving up then realising you’d like to give it another go is okay and of course, giving up horses and never riding again is absolutely okay.

I’m so sorry to hear about your horse, I would suggest taking a break once he’s gone. The time might give you clarity as to whether it is worth it, there’s always time to come back to something you love but if you find you have a happier life outside of horses then do whatever is right for you.

Whilst it is one of the most incredible sports to have an animal happy in to be in our company, it is such a heartbreaking one too.

 

[Skib]

I am very sorry about your heart horse.

For those who cant own, sharing should not be despised, but be warned, riders like me who share and who want to go on riding, also have heart break and need to replace their beloved horses from time to time, just as owners do. I lost my beautiful beautiful RS Connie aged 16 and still lament her.

You say you dont want an RS share. Strictly speaking, riding schools are not licenced to share (hire out) horses. A RS client must always be escorted by a member of staff. You would need to look for a RS that also does livery and ask whether they have an owner client who may want to share, in order to exercise their horse and contribute to the cost. Otherwise I suggest you look on line, possibly Face Book County riding pages to find a share. I found my present share by Googling and she lives on a sharing yard.

I have always fretted a lot about finding my next ride, but one has always turned up. People who love riding, seem to go on riding regardless and I hope it will eventually be the same for you.

 

[pistolpete]

Gorgeous picture, but in my head you were blonde!

 

[webble]

I updated YO today. She is lovely and happy to keep the stable for a few months after he is gone to let me sort my head out

 

[pistolpete]

I updated YO today. She is lovely and happy to keep the stable for a few months after he is gone to let me sort my head out

That’s really good. I think things will come clear for you. Follow your heart. Thinking of you. Such a difficult time.

 

[Barton Bounty]

So sorry to hear this Webble, as you know I only left it a couple of weeks before agreeing to have Orbi. I actually dont think I would have coped otherwise. He gave me a reason to keep going. It was really difficult at first. Orbi absolutely gave me his heart and made me love him and I struggled initially and felt so guilty but one day I just went out and was riding and thought I actually love this again. The grief comes in waves and some days i just used to hug Orbi and cry and bless him he just pulled me in. I dont think there ever is a time to be ready but Im glad my hubby pushed me and bought me Orbi
Sending lots of Hugs

 

[webble]

I have bitten the bullet and booked it for 9th Sept

 

[FinnishLapphund]

I have bitten the bullet and booked it for 9th Sept

I'm so sorry. I hope that you're able to as much as possible enjoy the time you have together up until then. Though, to be honest, when I've been in the situation that I've known that I don't have much time left with one of my pets, but that the final date is not within the next few days, I've sort of felt that it was a strange emotional mix between unintentionally counting down the days left, feeling blessed to get a bit more time with them, and trying to not think stupid thoughts about We only have X times left doing this, or This is the last time they/we do this.

{{{{{Hugs}}}}}

 

[cindars]

Lost my last girl last year have had horses for most of my married life,ridden since about 5,am on my 70s now,had a long talk with myself and decided to give it best, I've had the best of times,good friends and good horses but am content to look and I walk and ride a bike instead

 

[Skib]

I walk and ride a bike instead

Lucky you. My balance isnt good enough to ride a bike and particularly not in London. I havent ridden my bike for years. But unless I topple off the steps of the mounting block, I balance fine sitting on the favourite mare. She has a leg at each corner and stands solid.
I promised OH that as long as I could ride the horse, I wouldnt resurrect my bike

 

[cindars]

Lucky you. My balance isnt good enough to ride a bike and particularly not in London. I havent ridden my bike for years. But unless I topple off the steps of the mouting block, I balance fine sitting on the favourite mare. She has a leg at each corner and stands solid.
I promised OH that as long as I could ride the horse, I wouldnt resurrect my bike

Lucky I live under the South Downs,so still walk and ride bike where I used to ride horses.

 

[Birker2020]

I am so very sorry for your troubles OP.

Lost my horse after 17 yrs together, bought another who is now retired as he was missold to me.

I'm looking at getting another one, I find it painful visiting the yard where my stable is being held because it frustrates me not being able to ride and I miss it so much along with the memories of Bailey, I guess I never really got over her loss, just pushed it to the back of my brain somewhere. Sometimes it gets overwhelming revisiting. But so much easier when you have another to love. I used to love the care aspect even more than the riding. I love rehabbing, I enjoyed seeing what could be acheived and also learning, however difficult, what couldn't. That said don't want another to end up nursing!

The YO is also a personal friend too and has been nothing short of amazing and supportive in the way she been patient with me. She's been incredibly understanding, but it's helped that she has been involved in helping two other separate liveries find another horse to buy and has seen first hand the difficulty in choosing another horse, how many lame or dodgy horses there are out there, how hard it is to buy a decent (even half decent) horse now.

I'm 54 and only been doing this owning lark 'properly' for 30 years so it's still a novelty..... I think when it's in your blood it's hard. I want to go back to competing again, only low level stuff but I'd love to go to camps and away shows again. I have an almost addictive wanting, to revist my youth. Not sure why, but I feel the best is to come, maybe that is partly wishful thinking, maybe partly 'rose coloured glasses', I'm not really sure.

I'd not say I've particuarly missed the riding, it's more the routine and being in my 'happy bubble' nattering away to my horse and talking to friends on the yard. Going up first thing and having the yard to yourself, being there at the start of a fresh day. Exciting and why I can't sleep now, at 3.56am! because I'm excited about starting a new day. It's hard to replicate that down the park with the dog or going swimming at the gym.

Good to hear you are holding your stable. Wishing you all the best inbthe future, keep us updated!

 

[TinseLeneHorse]

Heartbreaking decision, but sounds like the right one for your lovely boy.
I can feel your pain as I lost my mare two weeks ago. I had intended a planned pts like yours but she made the decision for me.
Enjoy the time you have left with him and please don't feel guilty about your decision. It's the last act of kindness we can do for them