Dont want to be clingy. but........ sold him ............ and...

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Exploding Chestnuts

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OK, long story, but basically found a new home for My Boy, and it was all very traumatic.
Since then have had a brief reply to my one email, obviously the new owner does not want me involved, long story.............
But really, I want to be re-assured that horse is happy, after all that was the purpose of the exercise.
 
I think you need to give more details if you want advice. Don't want to sound mean, but if he was your soulmate, why did you sell him?
 
I'd glad he has a good home. Keeping in touch after a sale does depend on the new owners goodwill and the settling in period is often a tricky time when the owner is finding out what makes the horse tick.
So often you wonder what on earth you've bought until the dust settles.
Give them time and maybe send them a brief best wishes email at Christmas, perhaps with a nice photo of him when he was younger. It'll enable you to keep a line of communication open at least.
 
i feel for you op i was in a similar position 4 yrs ago made the biggest mistake of my life and sold my soul mate as i thought he deserved more :{ until the day i spotted him back up for sale in feb this year , they had me over a barrell i sold everything i could and i now have my boy home where he will stay until his last day.
never give up hope x
 
dogatemysalad said:
I'd glad he has a good home. Keeping in touch after a sale does depend on the new owners goodwill and the settling in period is often a tricky time when the owner is finding out what makes the horse tick.
So often you wonder what on earth you've bought until the dust settles.
Give them time and maybe send them a brief best wishes email at Christmas, perhaps with a nice photo of him when he was younger. It'll enable you to keep a line of communication open at least.
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I'll send him a card............ and it is his official birthday 1st Jan, was thinking of sending him a waffle sweat rug, but not sure he needs it where he is. He is fairly straightforward with an experienced rider, and he will soon show them his foibles!
Not too bothered about the owner not looking after him, obviously no one knows him like me, but I am sure one of the girls will take to him.
 
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I'd be a bit odd if my horses last owner sent me stuff for him. You found him the best home you could, so you have to trust he's ok and move on. One of my horses last owners, who seems really really lovely, send me a nice text a few weeks after i got him to ask how he was getting on. I thought that was lovely and I had no problem friending her on facebook so she could see how he was. She's been really nice and liked a few pics but doesn't get involved really, which is exactly what i'd do in her position.

I'd be a bit freaked out if an old owner kept sending me stuff every year. I mightn't like the colour, i might have one already, I mightn't have anywhere to store it. I'd be worried i didn't use and then i'd bump into you at a show and you'd be asking why i wasn't using it etc!

It sounds harsh but he's not your horse anymore. You seem to have a massive attachment to him still, and that would have me running a mile if i was his new owner!
 
paddi22 said:
You seem to have a massive attachment to him still, and that would have me running a mile if i was his new owner!
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I won't be doing any stalking, I just want to be re-assured that he is having fun in his new place, as promised, the new owner wanted to send me a video, that might be nice, but is he enjoying his new life?
I wont be meeting owner or horse at a show as I don't do horses any more.
The only reason I would go to see him [public yard], was if I was not sure he was being looked after as promised............ there was a deal............
 
The old owner of my horse is I contact with me , more me keeping her updated. She only hadher6 months after weaning and she's now 3 and half , I'm in contact with her breeder too. I know she's happy healthy and thriving and have nothing to hide, mrsd send me the waffle rug :) I'd love it if I got fre stuff
 
lurcherlu said:
The old owner of my horse is I contact with me , more me keeping her updated. She only hadher6 months after weaning and she's now 3 and half , I'm in contact with her breeder too. I know she's happy healthy and thriving and have nothing to hide, mrsd send me the waffle rug :) I'd love it if I got fre stuff
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What size?
I will be sending all My Boy 's stuff to charity eg Belwade.
but which centre is doing "the most good"
 
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Sorry you are feeling so bad, it's hard to let them go when you don't really want them to. Been there but sometimes it is for the best. Feel better x
 
Ive just bought my horse that i was loaning, had him 6 months, his owner, who loves him couldnt manage him and his needs after her new baby. She knows i love him and will care for him well, hes been with me 6 months, we're friends on fb and she sees how we're getting on through there, i find it a good way of her seeing how we're getting on without feeling watched, so I can understand what youre doing, but tbh i think you need to back off a wee bit, he's her horse now let her enjoy that feeling of the new relationship and the build up of the partnership,without possibly feeling overwhelmed by you and your relationship with the horse, by all means keep in touch but dont smother or she might send you packing. My boys previous owner is welcome any time to see him, and she knows that, but we keep things up by pictures and tagging in fb, i wouldnt like it if i felt i was being checked up on
 
MrsD123 said:
I had the knackerman booked cos I had no place to keep him............ horse lovers............ Dunoon................
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You have mentioned this before. I am sorry that you had to sell him but it's a bit weird that you keep referring to this, how come you couldn't put him at livery further away?
If you have got a reputation for being a little strange, maybe the new owner wants to make a clean break.
 
Marydoll said:
Ive just bought my horse that i was loaning, had him 6 months, his owner, who loves him couldnt manage him and his needs after her new baby. She knows i love him and will care for him well, hes been with me 6 months, we're friends on fb and she sees how we're getting on through there, i find it a good way of her seeing how we're getting on without feeling watched, so I can understand what youre doing, but tbh i think you need to back off a wee bit, he's her horse now let her enjoy that feeling of the new relationship and the build up of the partnership,without possibly feeling overwhelmed by you and your relationship with the horse, by all means keep in touch but dont smother or she might send you packing. My boys previous owner is welcome any time to see him, and she knows that, but we keep things up by pictures and tagging in fb, i wouldnt like it if i felt i was being checked up on
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Agree with this. My no2 horse arrived this summer, and I told his previous owner that she was welcome to visit/call any time if she wanted to. I also added her on FB, and she can see how he's getting on there. I know she sees his pics, and she always answers texts if I have a question, but she has left me to get on with it - after all she wouldn't have let me have him if she didn't trust me to give him a lovely home
 
Marydoll said:
Ive just bought my horse that i was loaning, had him 6 months, his owner, who loves him couldnt manage him and his needs after her new baby. She knows i love him and will care for him well, hes been with me 6 months, we're friends on fb and she sees how we're getting on through there, i find it a good way of her seeing how we're getting on without feeling watched, so I can understand what youre doing, but tbh i think you need to back off a wee bit, he's her horse now let her enjoy that feeling of the new relationship and the build up of the partnership,without possibly feeling overwhelmed by you and your relationship with the horse, by all means keep in touch but dont smother or she might send you packing. My boys previous owner is welcome any time to see him, and she knows that, but we keep things up by pictures and tagging in fb, i wouldnt like it if i felt i was being checked up on
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I am not checking up on an owner... My Boy is working for a living, but that is not a problem, main thing is that he has a home for life and be looked after in a professional yard, be looked after according to his needs, and have lots of fun and games, and also be playing with his friends in a field, I am sure he will occasionally object to things like discipline, but he will accept it.............
 
If you have got a reputation for being a little strange, maybe the new owner wants to make a clean break.
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This. If I was the new owner I'd be feeling very uncomfortable! Sorry you had to sell but the deed is done. Move on and let the new owner enjoy him without interference.
 
saddlesore said:
This. If I was the new owner I'd be feeling very uncomfortable! Sorry you had to sell but the deed is done. Move on and let the new owner enjoy him without interference.
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Why would you feel uncomfortable ..... you promised to provide a home for life with fun and games............ in exchange you got a nice, sound horse in his prime with a case history and saved him from the bullet.

I have sent one email asking how He is and advising him that he owes £10 to the girl who looked after Him for a day or so....
I left some stuff for Him, His feed, His bit and his passport and other kit.
I want the feed, and other stuff if he does not want it.
Now I have to ask , did you pay the groom, and did you take the goods, else I will have to go and collect them... and pay the groom......
 
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Once the horse is sold, sorry, that is it, there is not guarantee that the new owner will keep in contact.

I also think it would be odd if you sent a rug etc.
 
As i said if you felt you needed to check up on him then you should of put him on loan, you've got to move on and it's up to them if they get in touch. He's not your horse anymore, sorry but that's how it is.
 
MrsD123,
I am sorry you had to give up your horse but I think you really need to let this go as you are coming across a bit weird (and I suspect new horse owner thinks the same).
Forget the £10/food etc, its not important. If the others involved want to speak to you they will get in touch.
 
He is not in a private home, he is working for a living: the new [business]owner suggested he would send me a video, that was his suggestion, not mine, the new owner told me he would provide a good home for life with a pension plan! I have no reason to doubt that [got a reference]
I have not been stalking the new owner ....... see the title.............. I am not weird!
I might have known some idiots on here would go for my jugular.

The £10.00 is something I would owe to the groom if she has not been paid by the new owner, as it happens I don't leave debts when I leave a yard.

AND I dont want the nasty people on the yard to benefit from stuff that has been left in good faith for the horse.
 
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MrsD123 said:
I am not checking up on an owner... My Boy is working for a living, but that is not a problem, main thing is that he has a home for life and be looked after in a professional yard, be looked after according to his needs, and have lots of fun and games, and also be playing with his friends in a field, I am sure he will occasionally object to things like discipline, but he will accept it.............
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You might not think youre checking up, but your posts make you sound like you are. If it were me id feel very uncomfortable with your behaviour and would stop contact with you if it continued and once the tie is cut on these terms its unlikely you will have anything to do with him again. Step back, leave them until into the new year then if you still feel the need to follow the horse, text and ask how theyre getting on together or you might find yourself out of his life completely
 
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