Feel a bit sick and angry

[brighteyes]

Not read the last two pages, but does nobody else feel sorry for this mare? Shove her in a field and find a share horse. If you lived near me I'd fix you up for a few months. You must have liked her enough to buy her with a short wait - I couldn't cast her out there again...

 

[brighteyes]

I had a baby a few weeks ago. He'll be 31 in July.

Time flies and if there is something you really like about this horse you will regret it forever if you give her up for the sake of a paltry 12 months.

I LOVE this My time with the ones I have chosen (and regretted enough times on the way) will NEVER be long enough.

 

[cattysmith]

Surely you must be able to find someone with a field near by that you could leave her in for the next year? She was special enough for you to pick her out in the first place, can't you just give it a go and see what happens?

I understand your disappointment but she could be your horse of a lifetime it would be sad if either of you missed out because of the difference of a few months.

 

[cptrayes]

Not read the last two pages, but does nobody else feel sorry for this mare? Shove her in a field and find a share horse. If you lived near me I'd fix you up for a few months. You must have liked her enough to buy her with a short wait - I couldn't cast her out there again...

Frankly I think it is ridiculous to feel sorry for this mare. She is being well cared for, and she will be sold to a good home and continue to be well cared for. What on earth is there to feel sorry about?

 

[brighteyes]

Oh, and what's to say this next 'good home' won't pass her on? I'll say what I think, thank you.

 

[smiggy]

Just another to say dont always trust teeth. I have a rising 4 highland mare, chipped passported and pedigreed. I know her exact date of birth but looking at her teeth you would swear she was rising 3. Even the dentist thought I had read her passport age wrong.
Just like people, some people lose all their baby teeth really early and some really late, the standard 2.5/3.5/4.5 thing is just an average. There will be horses on either side of the curve.

 

[Beausmate]

Please think carefully about selling her as a broodmare. No matter how 'superb' she may be, there are a lot of unwanted horses out there already.

I've turned down offers for my filly to become a broodie and I hadn't even advertised her as such.

 

[cptrayes]

Oh, and what's to say this next 'good home' won't pass her on? I'll say what I think, thank you.

And her owner might, God forbid, die tomorrow. Life is too short to put it on hold for a nice, but ordinary, little mare. She's a horse, not her sister

You asked for opinions. You got mine. Don't ask if you don't want to hear the answer.

 

[Puzzles]

This is a really difficult decision and that last thing the OP needs is people jumping on her for it ... she can have a horse that she can truly be happy with, because it's all very well keeping her horse for another year etc, but it's too expensive in terms of money, time and emotions to have a horse just for the sake of it. Plus what about the horse herself? Rather than being selfish, I think the OP is being reaslitic and practical and using her head to make this decision, despite being torn. She is aware that it's not an ideal situation but is the lesser evil really keeping the youngster on? The OP is also thinking about her horse's needs, not just her own. This move is as just much for the horse as it is for the OP. Give her a break

 

[Wagtail]

Not read the last two pages, but does nobody else feel sorry for this mare? Shove her in a field and find a share horse. If you lived near me I'd fix you up for a few months. You must have liked her enough to buy her with a short wait - I couldn't cast her out there again...

Yes, quite a few of us have thought the same thing.

 

[rockysmum]

Please dont think I'm judging you, I know some people on here have been harsh.

Are you sure you are ready for another horse. I read your posts about losing your old girl after all those years.

I think most people who keep their horses as pets would be in love with such a perfect little girl by now, I would. I think thats the reason they are being a bit harsh. Perhaps one of the reasons you feel the way you do is that she isn't your old horse.

I have felt like this when I replaced my much loved dogs too soon. Will you buy another one and feel the same for different reasons.

Just a thought and good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[MrsMozart]

So nobody should sell a horse that isn't right for them?

Hm.

Interesting place this.

 

[Wagtail]

Please dont think I'm judging you, I know some people on here have been harsh.

Are you sure you are ready for another horse. I read your posts about losing your old girl after all those years.

I think most people who keep their horses as pets would be in love with such a perfect little girl by now, I would. I think thats the reason they are being a bit harsh. Perhaps one of the reasons you feel the way you do is that she isn't your old horse.

I have felt like this when I replaced my much loved dogs too soon. Will you buy another one and feel the same for different reasons.

Just a thought and good luck with whatever you decide.

Actually RM I think you have hit the nail on the head there. It took me two years to 'love' my two puppies that I bought to replace the beautiful girl I had stolen. I cared for them dearly but not a day went by that I wouldn't have swapped them for the one I had lost. But now they are every bit as dear to me as she was. I only bought them so soon to help my two small children get over the loss. It worked for them immediately!

 

[NeverSayNever]

So nobody should sell a horse that isn't right for them?

Hm.

Interesting place this.

it's becoming that way isnt ? I used to like HHO for its no no nonsense, non fluffy approach.

Why the heck should anyone feel sorry for the filly

A dog is for life, not just for Christmas. Some people need to get a grip and a reality check, a horse is a horse. I've sold 6 in as many years, they all went to nice homes, they were all pampered while with me. Crikey if folk don't like horses being moved on what would they think of the sheepdog world!

 

[M_G]

it's becoming that way isnt ? I used to like HHO for its no no nonsense, non fluffy approach.

Why the heck should anyone feel sorry for the filly

A dog is for life, not just for Christmas. Some people need to get a grip and a reality check, a horse is a horse. I've sold 6 in as many years, they all went to nice homes, they were all pampered while with me. Crikey if folk don't like horses being moved on what would they think of the sheepdog world!

This forum really makes me laugh sometimes...There are loads of loving homes out there & if it wasnt for sellers none of us would have a bloomin horse.

 

[touchstone]

Please dont think I'm judging you, I know some people on here have been harsh.

Are you sure you are ready for another horse. I read your posts about losing your old girl after all those years.

I think most people who keep their horses as pets would be in love with such a perfect little girl by now, I would. I think thats the reason they are being a bit harsh. Perhaps one of the reasons you feel the way you do is that she isn't your old horse.

I have felt like this when I replaced my much loved dogs too soon. Will you buy another one and feel the same for different reasons.

Just a thought and good luck with whatever you decide.

This has also crossed my mind too, it certainly sounds as if the op hasn't bonded with her new filly and I think it would be worth waiting a while as no horse will replace the one you lost and perhaps subconsciously comparing them is part of the problem.

I've no problem with people selling a horse that isn't right for them, but I think that the issue many people have is that this horse 'will' be right in a year or so's time; and the right horse is worth waiting a year for.

I hope all works out well for the filly, op, and the new horse.

 

[Ibblebibble]

I'd agree. There is a huge difference between rising 2 and rising 3, in terms of if you had set plans of what you wanted to achieve this year with them.
Selling her now, is no different as someone selling any other horse. She'll find a lovely new home and will carry on eating grass for a year - just with another person.

I love my 2 year old to bits and am actually really starting to enjoy doing all the ground work rather than having a main horse to ride. I was going to get another older horse for me to ride, however, I've now decided I like playing with Sparks on the ground too much! Granted, I can't wait till next year to start riding him...but until then I'm happy to do everything with him that he'll ever do when ridden also, with the hope that he'll be a super ridden later on in life. I do however have many other horses to ride at work and have fun with - so I do still have ones to ride.

If you need to sell her as she doesn't suit your requirements, then sell her and try and find an older one. There's no harm or shame in that! It'd be no different than a novice buying a plod horse - to it then turn out to be too fizzy. Not what they need, so they'd sell it and find one that they needed again. If you're not happy with the horse, then it's best for both to find yourself a new one that you like, and find someone for her who suits her also. Happy endings all round. Cob fillies always sell well, so I'm sure you won't have a problem.

Or, is there any way of keeping her somehow and getting another ridden one for yourself for a year? Either on loan for a year or whatever? You can have a years fun on another horse, and then next year, have her to work on

very sensible post if MiM had owned the filly for 2 years and not bonded and felt there was no future for them would people be jumping down her throat for thinking of selling?? of course not, sometimes we buy the wrong horse, either because we've been lied to or just plain incompatibility are we supposed to keep them forever??

 

['S'teamed]

looking at her "type" you could lightly back her at 2 anyhow and turn her away..and how about driving her?

As you're in Sth Glos.......did you get her straight from a "dealer" ( as there are many delightful ones around that area!) or did the vendor breed her themselves?

personally, i'd sell her on..and buy something else

 

[Natz88]

I haven't red all the replys, but as Wagtail has said I think Rockysmum has hit the nail on the head.

Some people may or may not agree with the OP's decision, but its only her who can decide & at the end of the day these horses are expensive animals & as op has said she set out to get a 3yr old ready to back & has found out the mare is actually rising 2 so it's alot of money to pay out livery etc for something to be a pet, alot of people would do it, but op doesn't want to & thats her choice. So I don't think she is being unfair to the mare, I think it would be more unfair to keep her knowing deep down she actually doesn't want her.

Not sure if it has been mentioned, but if your in doubt of what to do have you considered trying to find her a loan home as a companion for a year & maybe get something on loan for a year, but something older that you can just have a bit fo fun with for a while.

 

[Moggy in Manolos]

Hi everyone
Thanks for the support. I am investigating further by speaking to the vet who chipped her two days before she was delivered to me, and maybe getting an EDT.

I was so upset the other night, so upset, and yes I do long for my old mare, she was my world and this filly is lovely. I had already accepted it will take time to bond, we have made such progress and we like one another very much so far, but I think the bond needs time to grow.

I was so upset as i felt that this dob was made up, and I still think it is. I am getting further opinions and I will be searching hard in myself and my options as to what to do.
I wanted a 3 yr old that I could back and turn away, was thinking of the possibility of starting a family late this year/early next so 3 was the youngest I wanted. Yes she is not 3 yet, maybe she will be later in the year, but her teeth may help by doing what I would expect later in the year, who knows.

Anyway, shame this has come to this, I should never have risen to the bait of personal insults which seemed to start to come my way, such as, 'well i would not sell a horse to you'.
Anyway, I do hope this can be left. Thanks to those of you who have listened and supported me, that is why i came on here as I know people get sold a horse which is not as described all the time, I needed to vent, and yes I have felt and been emotional but some of the responses have been way out of order.

If anyone feels they have more to say I will no longer respond on this thread. If you want to talk to me you can send me a pm

 

[s4sugar]

Pity you got stuck in this position and the passporting vet has some questions to answer as foals born after June 2009 should have been chipped before 6 months of the year end so if she is younger than 2 1/2 she should have been done then. From this it may be that she just has slow teeth.

Pity you aren't nearer. I could offer a swap for a year for an ex broodie coming back into work.