Hiding your pregnancy

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Malin100

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Can I have stories from any riders who have not wanted to ride at all while pregnant, but wanted to hide their pregnancy until the 3+ month mark?

What have you told people?

Interested to hear from all but the situation would be sharing a horse from a friend and sometimes riding some other friends' horses, but not wanting to tell any of them the real reason.
 
A person I shared jumping lessons with rode normally til she was 7 months and we had no idea. One memorable lesson when she had to have been 5 months plus, she was jumping without stirrups over about 80cm! She had an air jacket on, I can't say if she always had an airjacket or if this was a pregnancy addition but I was totally and utterly gobsmacked when she announced she was pregnant.

Strangely she's sold her horse and totally given up since the baby was born.
 
I'm in the same situation, though I've been terribly poorly, so it's become obvious and I've had to tell people a i don't like lying. I'm also in the fortunate position that my mare is also expecting so isn't in work, which does help.

Just say you've got some kind of injury that prevents you from riding.
 
No personal experience but I reckon the best excuse would be the old "back bad" one - very hard to disprove and would also get you out of any heavy lifting.

I think anyone who has ever suffered with their back will tell you that sometimes they just had to put their lives on hold until it was sorted.
 
I stopped jumping at 3 mths and reduced the dressage (find that more difficult to do - get tired so quickly). No one could tell I was pregnant although jodhpurs became uncomfortable. No one asked and so I didn't need to offer any explanations. I don't like telling fibs as it then becomes obvious.
 
I am just curious but why would you want to hide your pregnancy? I haven't got children so I don't understand the reasoning is it just to avoid people's opinions? Could understand that really people can be a bit annoying at times haha.
 
Someone I know hunted until a month before her due date, even fell off 4 times in the last hunt! Her mother eventually banned her.
If she was my daughter she would have been banned ages ago.
 
A friend of mine who was a groom in hunt service didnt tell anyone she was pregnant and no one sussed- it was winter and she wore massive big jumpers and coats to work- she rode as normal all the way through, even riding second horse, was working until the day before she 'foaled' when she rang in sick.
 
But I have also known someone who had several miscarriages, was pregnant again, Dr. advised her not to ride, but she didnt want to tell anyone till she was nearly 6 months, just so she didnt have to tell people she'd had a miscarriage if it happened again...... (she now has a 3 yr old :) )
 
rachk89 said:
I am just curious but why would you want to hide your pregnancy? I haven't got children so I don't understand the reasoning is it just to avoid people's opinions? Could understand that really people can be a bit annoying at times haha.
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I can understand not wanting to tempt fate by announcing a pregnancy early, in case of miscarriage.

A 'bad back' which stops the OP from riding is a good white lie, I reckon.
 
Most people don't want to reveal they are pregnant until three months. I'm 17 weeks now but I don't ride anyway - I have a 37 year old and an 18 month old Shetland! Go with the bad back idea, or tell them you are taking a break for the winter.
 
rachk89 said:
I am just curious but why would you want to hide your pregnancy? I haven't got children so I don't understand the reasoning is it just to avoid people's opinions? Could understand that really people can be a bit annoying at times haha.
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I misread it when I replied before. Most folk don't want to tell anyone until they are 12 weeks when they've had a scan.

Op just til them you've pulled a muscle or something.
 
Tiddlypom said:
I can
understand not wanting to tempt fate by announcing a pregnancy early, in case of miscarriage.

A 'bad back' which stops the OP from riding is a good white lie, I reckon.
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That's true didn't think of that. Like i say never been pregnant so never had to think about it.

I would say bad back too. They can last for ages.
 
I didn't show until about 5 month when my bump seemed to grow overnight. Eve up until about 8 months my bump was still disguised by a roomy blouson type jacket.

Sciatica or a bad back are believable excuses for not riding. Or a trapped nerve in shoulder/neck?
 
rachk89 said:
I am just curious but why would you want to hide your pregnancy? I haven't got children so I don't understand the reasoning is it just to avoid people's opinions? Could understand that really people can be a bit annoying at times haha.
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Sometimes it's just so you don't have to answer constant questions, also if it's been a long time of trying many women prefer not to announce until at least the first scan when it's a definate viable pregnancy. Been there with a none viable one and I'm so glad I avoided all those questions!
 
I'd definitely go with bad back- no one will question it too much and you can still be around the horses. Just say it aggravates your back to ride but jobs etc don't seem too much trouble if you still want to do them.

Blouson style coats are good for hiding baby bumps- my bump wasn't massive but I am quite wide 😄

I was nearly 6 months in this photo, it's obvious if you know but actually the coat was that shape anyway, I wore it right through to the end but all my longer, straighter cut coats were no good by 4 months ish.



I didn't tell anyone till I was about 13/14 weeks. No one realised I just kept saying I didn't feel like riding that much. The day after my scan I went up without a coat and in my work clothes and someone guessed straight off :D
 
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Thanks all! I guessed a made up injury would probably be the solution, but didn't know if there were any other good ideas. I'll just have to be careful choosing my injury so I can still do the things I want to do without arousing suspicion!
 
Another option is turning your horse out for a month on the basis that it's January. I do it every year, horse needs a break and I'm not motivated to ride!
 
Cortez said:
Why would you want to lie about it? Strange. Just....don't ride; it's nobody's business anyway.
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Not everyone wants to tell people so early. Some have complications earlier in the pregnancy and 3 months is typically the point at which the pregnancy is 'confirmed'. My understanding is the OP wants to wait until that point.
 
Cortez said:
Why would you want to lie about it? Strange. Just....don't ride; it's nobody's business anyway.
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It is very, very common to wait until after the first scan. Chance of miscarriage is much much higher than you may think. I won't be telling my friends or employer until minimum 3 months, even my family won't be told for the first while. I certainly don't want a whole yard knowing and I can't 'just not ride' as I mentioned I share a horse and ride other people's so it is blatantly obvious if I even miss one day of riding. Therefore I need to have a good reason to tell people why I'm stopping riding for the foreseeable future. I don't like lying, but for the short term it's what I'll have to do.
 
My friend went out for a 3 hour hack the day before giving birth & was jumping the week before but he was early (4 weeks I think) but her mare is a saint!

I would just say you've injured something or other
 
I would also go with bad back. I rode till 6 months with 1st kid and 4 with 2nd. I did stop jumping straight away, and gradually reduced what I did. I had to stop when one day I got stuck on to of my 17,2. The bump was so big that I could not swing my leg over front or back! Had to find a high wall and clamber off!
 
I think cortez meant just don't sayany reason why you're not riding, I don't believe she was suggesting telling everyone that OP is pregnant, just not making any comment at all.
 
nato said:
Another option is turning your horse out for a month on the basis that it's January. I do it every year, horse needs a break and I'm not motivated to ride!
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this! its bloody misserable weather everywhere so if someone asks just say thecweathers getting you down and you don't feel like riding in it, I've not ridden in months because quite simply I can not be bothered riding in bad weather, just do your jobs and go, I honestly don't think anybody would notice though and the time will fly by, you could even find a part loaner to keep your horse ticking over in ridden work and tell people you just don't have time right now with work and family commitments
 
rowan666 said:
this! its bloody misserable weather everywhere so if someone asks just say thecweathers getting you down and you don't feel like riding in it, I've not ridden in months because quite simply I can not be bothered riding in bad weather, just do your jobs and go, I honestly don't think anybody would notice though and the time will fly by, you could even find a part loaner to keep your horse ticking over in ridden work and tell people you just don't have time right now with work and family commitments
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Thanks everyone!

I can't do this ^ though unfortunately as I don't have my own horse. I'm supposed to ride my share horse several times per week and usually with the owner while she rides her other horse. It would not be acceptable to her to say I didn't want to ride because of the weather, so I'll have to use the bad back idea!
 
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