Horses and having children on yards....thoughts?

I don't have children, I am a teacher and I love having children on the yard. they have helped my boy get use to prams and balloons, footballs and rugby balls, trampolines - he loves watching the kids on it. it makes him much easier to take out
 
My 3 kids were welcome at our very child-friendly yard when they were small. The two girls then took lessons when they were old enough, my son played with the other non-riding kids and had a blast. The same at shows. Kids and adults would all go along and everyone encouraged each other. It helped that the YO’s had kids too.

This was in the USA where children (back in the 90’s) were always catered for, and tolerated. That being said, inappropriate behaviour around the horses wasn’t allowed, and it was quickly nipped in the bud. Same with dogs.

Over here, I found the attitude totally different. This thread is quite a sad read. It’s down to the parent involved (usually mother I suppose) to make sure their kids behave around the horses appropriately, and not just use the yard as a babysitting service.

Yes, there are brats, but I find grumpy gossiping and/or bullying adults more offensive, like one of the earlier posters mentioned.
 
Depends on the yard and the people. Personally kids generally annoy me, they move about too much and are far too loud. And they always run everywhere - why do they always need to run? My horse is not scared of them but he’s an adults type of horse and the running and yelling can make him a bit anxious. They also keep popping up in random corners of the arena coming out of the bushes etc which is very very annoying and I have had to give them a stare of death before. We’ve only got about three that are rarely there though thankfully.

But I will add that when I worked in a riding school for kids I loved all the action but that’s because that’s what the scene was. I wouldn’t want my own horse in that scene.
 
Last edited:
much s we all love our horses I would have thought that mothers could tear themselves away for a few hours to give birth in a maternity unit. ( Having children on yards)---Sorry I couldn't resist LOL
 
I take my little girl with me when I do my ponies if I don't have someone to watch her while I'm there but I have always been on very small "private" yards and not a full on livery yard with lots of horses. I have made sure that she is with me or safe in the car watching a DVD (I always check on her and the car was parked in the actual yard near the boxes). I have taught her the correct way to behave around ponies but not all parents do this. I can fully understand why people aren't tolerant of children though.
 
Kids welcome on our yard. There's usually a gaggle of kids, dogs and cats. It's a busy but calm peaceful atmosphere and the older kids show the younger ones how to behave. I personally wouldn't bring mine if I were riding but if just doing chores, then I get a handy helper.

The horses get desensitised, the kids gain confidence and make friends.

I'm glad we have a busy farm where kids and dogs are the very least of a horses worry... there's cattle running in and out of sheds going to pasture, tractors, quad bikes, lorries, vans... the horses just get used to it and don't seem to care.

I do feel a bit sorry for people who haven't got the capacity to tolerate anything out of their control, must be a hard life to live.
 
tallyho! said:
Kids welcome on our yard. There's usually a gaggle of kids, dogs and cats. It's a busy but calm peaceful atmosphere and the older kids show the younger ones how to behave. I personally wouldn't bring mine if I were riding but if just doing chores, then I get a handy helper.

The horses get desensitised, the kids gain confidence and make friends.

I'm glad we have a busy farm where kids and dogs are the very least of a horses worry... there's cattle running in and out of sheds going to pasture, tractors, quad bikes, lorries, vans... the horses just get used to it and don't seem to care.

I do feel a bit sorry for people who haven't got the capacity to tolerate anything out of their control, must be a hard life to live.
Click to expand...

I feel the same as you, I only ever ride when my partner has the baby but I do have to take him with me to do chores from time to time, I am very responsible and careful but I am surprised that people don't want them around. I mean very surprised.
People have families its the most natural thing in the world and not to want children around is amazing to me. Saying that I am a riding instructor, I am very used to teaching children and making sure they are safe around the horses, but then having my own was a massive eye opener to how attitudes can be toward them. I had no idea!
I think someone above said something like are you ok with an accident happening or a child getting kicked, I mean for god sake did everyone start riding at 18 and above, no, most decent riders and most of our Olympic riders started as tiny tots - thank god those yards were tolerant enough to let them be around horses!
 
tallyho! said:
I do feel a bit sorry for people who haven't got the capacity to tolerate anything out of their control, must be a hard life to live.
Click to expand...

Far far from it, its a wonderful peaceful life. Never feel sorry for someone who doesnt want or like kids. We are far more lucky than those with that responsibility hanging round there necks like a heavy weight!

I'm trying not to be but I do find myself becoming a bit of a 'breeder hater' but I've always been against unnecessary breeding of animals. I mean with so many animals in rescues up and down the country why would you ever need to breed .... It was only a matter of time before I thought the same about humans. Like the world isnt overpopulated enough already!!
 
I think the Brits are generally less child friendly than other countries. I do love kids and like having them about my pony on the other hand hates them couldnt eat a whole one but would give it a try.All the kids that come to the yard are told not to go near him. Any tinies about and he is put well away from them He usually like this as it involves being allowed more food. I find this thread really sad the lack of tolerance and the selfishness is horrid but it takes all sorts to make a world I am just grateful I am not one of those that have such miserable attitudes
 
Antw23uk said:
Far far from it, its a wonderful peaceful life. Never feel sorry for someone who doesnt want or like kids. We are far more lucky than those with that responsibility hanging round there necks like a heavy weight!

I'm trying not to be but I do find myself becoming a bit of a 'breeder hater' but I've always been against unnecessary breeding of animals. I mean with so many animals in rescues up and down the country why would you ever need to breed .... It was only a matter of time before I thought the same about humans. Like the world isnt overpopulated enough already!!
Click to expand...

Blimey - you would truly detest me then I have a baby and have bred a foal!
 
Britain in general is very intolerant of children... But then again British children can often be so much worse behaved than European ones! Which came first though? Do children never learn to behave in grown-up spaces because they aren't tolerated? So they spend their lives in made-for-kids play areas and parks so never learn to adapt to different environments? My kids love horses and are very good around them. They had every right to be on the yard looking after their own pony and riding. But even they were often on the sharp end of some miserable ******'s tongue for no real reason at my old yard. I found that baffling and sad so left in the end. Much happier now on a busy yard with lots of well behaved children who all ride amazingly!
 
windand rain said:
I think the Brits are generally less child friendly than other countries. I do love kids and like having them about my pony on the other hand hates them couldnt eat a whole one but would give it a try.All the kids that come to the yard are told not to go near him. Any tinies about and he is put well away from them He usually like this as it involves being allowed more food. I find this thread really sad the lack of tolerance and the selfishness is horrid but it takes all sorts to make a world I am just grateful I am not one of those that have such miserable attitudes
Click to expand...

My gelding LOVES children .. I slightly hate him for it! ;)
 
Farma said:
I think someone above said something like are you ok with an accident happening or a child getting kicked, I mean for god sake did everyone start riding at 18 and above, no, most decent riders and most of our Olympic riders started as tiny tots - thank god those yards were tolerant enough to let them be around horses!
Click to expand...

I think there is a difference with children learning to ride, or having their own pony with an adult concentrating on them and showing them what to do - compared with a toddler going down to the yard for the adult to do their horse. I can't see how you can be simultaneously leading your horse out of the stable and also looking after the toddler. That is different to the toddler being fully engaged in leading their own (smaller) pony. I agree that a baby in a pram is easier, and older ones can be sent to the tack room to play on tech, but toddlers need 1-1 attention. As OP succinctly said, you can't "bind and gag them" so toddlers need their hands holding or 1-1 attention.

For toddlers I agree with a previous poster who had their own livery yard, but when they had a toddler they waited for someone to babysit the toddler before attempting to do stuff with the horses.
 
I have actively sought out a yard that does not permit children or dogs; I don't care for either much and prefer to have my horse time not in their company.

If I was at a yard that permitted them obviously I would have to tolerate them but would not encourage them.

I learnt to ride as a three year old at a riding school; my parents were not horsey and believed it was right that they should pay for my horse time in a safe child orientated environment.
 
There's a toddler who comes to the yard every day with her mother. She is an absolute delight. She has her own mini wheel barrow and other tools and she solemnly mimics her mum in doing all the chores. She is quiet, patient, focused, giggly, enthusiastic, cheerful and willing. A lot of that, I think, comes from her mother who is patient and involves her fully in everything she's doing instead of 'parking' her somewhere and expecting her to just wait without grizzling. She adores the horses too - especially my 'big horsey' who she is a little in awe of!
 
Farma said:
Thanks, I do find some replies interesting really. I am just shocked at how many people are not tolerant of children. I have a toddler and obviously try my best to make sure he doesn't upset or frighten any horses but obviously he is a toddler so I cant bind and gag him!

It has never bothered me that people have their kids at yards, never crossed my mind much tbh and I have had numerous competition horses I could have been precious about getting spooked, just a massive surprise to me since I have had mine how people feel about them!
Click to expand...

It's not so much about the horses getting spooked, I'm happy for mine to get used working and ignoring activity around them; it's just that parents get a bit funny if their precious ends up in hospital. And you guarantee the horse would get the blame, not the child.

I have been on yards where small children have run up to horses and grabbed their hind legs, run under their bellies, in one case ran in to the school where I had a horse just off box rest throwing shapes on the lunge and asking if they can 'play with the big brown horse'. One stray hoof from a bucking horse could do alot of injury to a small person. This was a very big yard with a variety of horses so you couldn't guarantee their behaviour so in that context free range children was not best idea.

Current yard I often take my retired down the lane for a walk and will stop to let children pat him. 16'3 tb and very sweet and gentle around them however it's a controlled situation with me being aware of where they are, if there's anything approaching that might spook him and the parents are with them and in control of the kids so if I say he's a bit fidgety today they will tell them to keep a distance.

I
 
Last edited:
Antw23uk said:
Far far from it, its a wonderful peaceful life. Never feel sorry for someone who doesnt want or like kids. We are far more lucky than those with that responsibility hanging round there necks like a heavy weight!

I'm trying not to be but I do find myself becoming a bit of a 'breeder hater' but I've always been against unnecessary breeding of animals. I mean with so many animals in rescues up and down the country why would you ever need to breed .... It was only a matter of time before I thought the same about humans. Like the world isnt overpopulated enough already!!
Click to expand...

Good for you.

Sorry to read that you feel kids are "heavy weights"... shame your parents made you feel that way about yourself.
 
People who have kids always feel the need to vindicate it and get quite defensive when people say they would prefer not to have them about - why is that? If you have kids they are your world. That’s totally fine and understandable. But if you don’t have kids why do you need to get them pushed on you by other people - is it because the people with kids have “seen the light?” It’s like someone saying I feel sorry for you you’ve not got Jesus in your life. It’s judgy and unnecessary. Have a kid, have twenty, I don’t care. But I don’t pay hundreds of pounds a month to be around kids - hence choosing yard with less kids and no toddlers. I’m not intolerant of them, I just don’t fancy them much. I don’t much fancy goats either, so I won’t be paying to be on a yard with 500 goats!
 
equi said:
People who have kids always feel the need to vindicate it and get quite defensive when people say they would prefer not to have them about - why is that? If you have kids they are your world. That’s totally fine and understandable. But if you don’t have kids why do you need to get them pushed on you by other people - is it because the people with kids have “seen the light?” It’s like someone saying I feel sorry for you you’ve not got Jesus in your life. It’s judgy and unnecessary. Have a kid, have twenty, I don’t care. But I don’t pay hundreds of pounds a month to be around kids - hence choosing yard with less kids and no toddlers. I’m not intolerant of them, I just don’t fancy them much. I don’t much fancy goats either, so I won’t be paying to be on a yard with 500 goats!
Click to expand...

Well said :)
 
Current yard is adults, purely because that is how its happened not because there is any paticular ban.

I have been on 2 different yards where there were two children about and it was two very different experiences.

Yard 1 - GANGS of children. Left wheelbarrows full, stole feed, bedding, money out of my purse on one occasion. It could be very distracting and to be honest, intimidating. I was a teen and quite shy, gaggles of other kids/teens wandering about really intimidated me.

It was a massive yard so we are talking 20-30 children. EVERYTHING including your wheelbarrow, tack, feed, grooming kit etc had to be bolted down or you would find it across the yard a week later. Kids would be running around the place, yelling, screaming. You'd be trying to ride and suddenly your horse would spook because a child would decide that a waterfight on the yard would be a good idea etc.

Yard 2 - More expensive competition type yard. I was staff there. We had a group of kids who came up at the weekends for the day to look after their ponies. BUT, much more sensible, same age group as yard 1, but on the whole they were very polite and level headed.

There was a rule that if they came up for the day and they weren't doing things for their ponies (and they wouldn't be, solidly for 7-8hrs) they had to help staff. Things like, help bring the odd horse in, fill some haynets, do a bit of sweeping, maybe clean some tack, nothing taxing, just the odd 20 mins help here and there. In exchange, I would nanny the kids out hacking or be the person on the ground if they wanted to use the XC course or jump in the arena. (Under 16s had to have a person over 16 supervising them when jumping).

The YO was determined we weren't a babysitting service and if they were going to spend the entire day at the yard they could help out a little. She was also determined that if they child wasn't going to behave then she would ring their parents and have them taken home. The kids knew she was deadly serious so they behaved, we never really had any problems and I can't remember ever having to resort to ringing parents.

So on the whole, it depends on the kids and the yard setup.

Yard 1, the owner didn't care, she was trying to sell and obviously no-one tried to steal her things so she didn't realise or care about the full extent of the impact the kids were having on the yard.

Yard 2, the YO was much more involved, she cared about how the children would behave and wanted them to be able to come to the yard, BUT not disrupt other liveries.
 
equi said:
People who have kids always feel the need to vindicate it and get quite defensive when people say they would prefer not to have them about - why is that? If you have kids they are your world. That’s totally fine and understandable. But if you don’t have kids why do you need to get them pushed on you by other people - is it because the people with kids have “seen the light?” It’s like someone saying I feel sorry for you you’ve not got Jesus in your life. It’s judgy and unnecessary. Have a kid, have twenty, I don’t care. But I don’t pay hundreds of pounds a month to be around kids - hence choosing yard with less kids and no toddlers. I’m not intolerant of them, I just don’t fancy them much. I don’t much fancy goats either, so I won’t be paying to be on a yard with 500 goats!
Click to expand...

Exactly, people ask why don't you have children I always why do you have them! Usually shuts them up. We should be able to say we want child free places as much as parents want child friendly places. Not worse just different
 
Mini sf aged 4 has just become actually helpful at the yard, rather than just 'helping' but actually making things much slower. She is chief bucket collector and washer. She's not that wary around their back legs, but she's only let near those that are as safe as horses can be.

There's been a few years of screaming in the hay bar in the car seat or pushchair up to this point, I don't dawdle though, it's like someone has a stop watch on me, I've forgotten what it's like not to be in a rush
 
Children on yards supervised at all times = no problem at all
Children being allowed to run riot/parents using the yard as a creche = not ok.

Yards are dangerous places and imo not a place for small children BUT I appreciate life is complicated and it sometimes may not be possible to leave the kids at home. As long as parents keep them under control and don't let them run riot, thats fine.
 
Last edited:
tallyho! said:
I do feel a bit sorry for people who haven't got the capacity to tolerate anything out of their control, must be a hard life to live.
Click to expand...
Yes it is pretty rubbish, I spend much of my life trying to manage it, for instance I spend a lot of time in ear plugs because I am noise sensitive too. I have in the past been really upset when my only 'zen' part of my day which will have been filled with things out of my control, with my pony gets interrupted somehow as it means I don't get any of that time then.

I do think it is ok to not want to spend enforced time around other people's children, and that if you don't to choose a set up that then suits you, the same as all the other reasons you would choose a yard for. I wouldn't complain about children on a yard which allowed children, unless they were being a hazard to themselves. It is also possible to bombproof and childproof a horse without them free ranging a yard. I know because I have one.

I grew up working in a riding school, it was a place for children, I was only a teen myself all good.
I have spent time riding other people's horses kept on yards with large numbers of children wailing and making a lot of noise because they didn't want to be out in the cold and rain while mum looked after a pony they had no interest in at all. They seemed to come with shouty mums too which also didn't help. - Generally it was an atmosphere of everyone, including the horses being on edge.

We have a lot of neighbours to our fields with grandchildren (over 50s van homes down one side), they are all invited round to come and meet, brush, prepare the feeds have a sit on the ponies as I would have loved that as a kid, so I am not exactly anti child.
 
mother_of_poniesx said:
Children on yards supervised at all times = no problem at all
Children being allowed to run riot/parents using the yard as a creche = not ok.
Click to expand...

Spot on. My last yard was a nightmare and I got shouted at by one of the mothers when I asked her 10yo daughter to stop bouncing a ball against the outside of the indoor school while I was riding. Not great on any horse, but especially not on one who had been out of work for a month. Apparently I should have spoken to the mother about the issue. I think my retort of 'well that would have been from a&e if she hadn't stopped with that ****** ball' shut her up.

Current yard the YO is definitely not one for babysitting. If kids are on the yard then they work. There are always fields to poo pick. Most liveries don't bring their kids to the yard, but if they come then they pick up on the atmosphere and behave. Its soooo much nicer!
 
I'm generally not a fan of children (I don't have the patience) but I recognise the value of young adults and the opportunity the equestrian lifestyle offers in bringing them up to be considerate, sensible adults. We can't expect them to evolve overnight from annoying children into useful, valuable additions to society. The young adults at our yard are an asset because they've been around horses since they were children.

Lets also not forget Riding for the Disabled. Many of these children struggle to remain calm and quiet when enjoying their first trot. The difference here is that these children are never unsupervised.

Is it 'children' that are the problem or unsupervised children?
 
Not a fan of children at all, and I don't think yards are an ideal place for children. My yard is my peaceful place, Yard Owner doesn't allow children or groups e.g. don't bring your aunties cousins five children to stroke the horses.

However, I don't think the problem is ever the children; usually it's the adults who aren't supervising them correctly.
If I had my own child and needed to have that child at the yard with me for whatever reason, I would take the time to teach them how to behave. Children running riot on a yard is usually paired with gossiping mothers who have no authority over their kids and so end up screaming down the yard as little Harry and Jessica spook the horses, tip wheelbarrows and throw hay at each other.
 
Lol at 'if I had a child and they needed to be there for whatever reason'

The reason being that life doesn't stop because you have kids and most of us have to get on with stuff with the kids in tow most of the time. Doing the horses is far easier than doing the supermarket shop :D
 
IME, the kids who are there to see to their own pony are generally pretty good. There used to be a couple on my yard who were more sensible, dedicated, and focused on their pony's welfare than a lot of the adults.

The kids who are there while mum sees to her horse CAN be good, but only if properly supervised.

The ones who are there while mum sees to her horse and are left to run wild are an absolute nightmare. I found one in my share horse's stable waving a whip at his legs to make him jump. (She got soundly *******ed and heard words she'd probably never heard before.)

Given the choice, I'd opt for a childfree yard, simply because a flat-out, "No kids," is easier for a YO to enforce than a, "Well-behaved kids only".
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top