Horsey phrases with different meanings to "normal" people

[Elf On A Shelf]

You know what it's like when you are chatting amongst like minded horsey folk and you don't really think about what you say. Then you go out in the big wide world and say the same things and the reaction you get is either looks of horror or disgust!

What are your favourite phrases or words than have different meanings depending on the company?

One of my favourites is: I love having a good 16 odd hands of hot sweaty muscle thundering away between my thighs.

 

[Pippity]

I've learned to tell my non-horsey friends, "I didn't bother with a saddle tonight," rather than, "I rode bareback tonight."

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Mentioning the bean removal lady is an interesting one ?

 

[chaps89]

I once told my colleagues I was going to feed the pony at lunchtime. I had no idea this apparently can mean something very different ?

 

[Gloi]

I used to get teased at work after I once carelessly mentioned I'd been riding my black stallion.
In case of misunderstanding here he is...

 

[paddy555]

in the olden days horses were described as "a gay ride"

 

[turkana]

I had a girth that was a bit short - don't google "girth extender" on the work computer on your lunch break! Especially with a colleague behind you!!!

 

[Smitty]

in the olden days horses were described as "a gay ride"

I don't imagine you see that in adverts these days ?

 

[tda]

I had a girth that was a bit short - don't google "girth extender" on the work computer on your lunch break! Especially with a colleague behind you!!!

?snort ?

 

[paddy555]

I don't imagine you see that in adverts these days ?

well probably not horse ones.

 

[Tiddlypom]

I once told my colleagues I was going to feed the pony at lunchtime. I had no idea this apparently can mean something very different ?

Erm, dare I ask what alternative meaning 'feed the pony' has apart from giving a meal to a small equine?

 

[chaps89]

Erm, dare I ask what alternative meaning 'feed the pony' has apart from giving a meal to a small equine?

Essentially it’s slang for a woman pleasuring herself/being pleasured. I had no idea and that was most definitley not what I was announcing to my colleagues when I was explaining why I wasn’t joining them for a pub lunch!

 

[Alibear]

"I've got a riding lesson" Which seems totaly benign to me at the time. But certainly caused a few smirks on a work call when I used it as a reason for not being at work on Friday.
Adding the words "on a horse" made it worse

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

I remember working in an all-male environment a few years ago now, and you didn't dare go in on a Monday morning and declare that you'd "had a good ride" over the weekend...........

 

[Roxylola]

Mentioning the bean removal lady is an interesting one ?

I found a pair of rubber gloves in my pocket while at work. Literally the only thing I use them for is sheath cleaning but I was not about to explain that ?

 

[paddy555]

Essentially it’s slang for a woman pleasuring herself/being pleasured. I had no idea and that was most definitley not what I was announcing to my colleagues when I was explaining why I wasn’t joining them for a pub lunch!

and every day's a school day on here.

 

[Barton Bounty]

I remember working in an all-male environment a few years ago now, and you didn't dare go in on a Monday morning and declare that you'd "had a good ride" over the weekend...........

Yeah I would never discuss it there, I was the same ?

 

[Cob Life]

I remember working in an all-male environment a few years ago now, and you didn't dare go in on a Monday morning and declare that you'd "had a good ride" over the weekend...........

This is only made worse when your horse is called Brad or something else vaguely human!

 

[Cloball]

Talking about the 2 and 3yos being naughty at work. ... Had to explain I was not taking about human children.
Also explaining to a concerned gynaecologist that the teeth marks in my leg were from a naughty foal.

 

[Baywonder]

At work one day, someone commented on how slim I was. I replied "It's all the riding I do"

I think everyone in the office instantly choked on their morning coffee..............

 

[Peglo]

Yeah I would never discuss it there, I was the same ?

i work with men in a store and my OH gets a fair ripping when I say ‘I had a quick ride last night.’

 

[ycbm]

The whole office fell apart laughing when I was talking about my mare being clipped and I said "I told him not to take her head off and he went and did it anyway! ".

Took me an age to work out why.
.

 

[Cowpony]

Searching German riding method on the internet is an eye-opener

 

[smolmaus]

Me and a friend having a loud and enthusiastic conversation about thrush remedies from adjacent stalls in an Applegreens bathroom.

I hope nobody tries copper sulphate.

 

[Errin Paddywack]

Not horsey but don't recommend googling dog obedience on a work computer.

 

[Dave's Mam]

This is only made worse when your horse is called Brad or something else vaguely human!

Yes, it's a good job my work colleagues know that Dave is my pony!

 

[scats]

Not quite the same but in the days before iCloud, I was changing my mobile and called into the local O2 store to collect new phone. Man asked if he wanted me to transfer everything over, to which I said that that would be great. He did a few things and plugged my phone into his computer and new phone in as well and then my photos started (quickly, thankfully) appearing one after each other on the computer screen as they loaded. He made a point of not looking, which is just as well really, because my horse at the time had just had his partial phallectomy due to squamous cell carcinoma and so about a hundred photos of a horses manky willy appeared on the screen… starting with the pre-op photos and then the post-op. Some of the post op ones, complete with swelling and stitches, were pretty horrific looking! All I could do was stand there next to this bloke, making polite conversation, while about 2 minutes worth of various stages of a sad looking willy flashed away on the screen in front of us.
When I got out that shop I couldn’t stop laughing!

 

[stangs]

In order of weird to criminal, I have previously said, on different occasions, that “I love…
1. green horses
2. breaking babies
3. riding babies”

 

[Snowfilly]

Stallion harness is another thing not to be googled at work.

Also the phrase ‘that black *******’ in reference to the currently un-named black feral who’d kicked through the stable door and escaped into the field isn’t a good one to use in public… in my defence, there were three ferals all without names and he was the only black.

 

[ZondaR]

Me in Nandos with my son who was 15 at the time. "Pablo was very stiff in my hand last night. My left arm is a bit sore."
Son covered his face with his hands and slid down in the chair. That's when I head myself.