I am BLAZING mad!

I have absolutely no doubt my boss would let me do what ever necessary for a sick animal. I can work from home so could keep on top of things. I did work in a factory many moons ago. We bought a huge cob off someone after its field mate died. I broke her in and rode her for a few months. Around Christmas time so got colic. Got vet who thought huge worm burden, which is probably what her mate died of. Had vet out a few times . I gad to go to work one afternoon/ evening. I told bosses about horse but they weren't interested. They said if I left work I would be sacked. I got home that evening to find horse dead.
 
When I had arranged to have my horse PTS I needed to leave work early. I never said why I needed to leave but my boss said I could go.
I didn’t tell anyone at work I’d had her PTS for several days until one of the boys questioned me about why I wasn’t running. When my boss found out he was upset I hadn’t told him, not from a work point of view but because he wanted to help/support me which he had by letting me leave without explanation. I feel very lucky with my work.

I too would be furious in your situation. There’s more important things than a job, especially one that won’t support you when you need it. As Red says if your job looks after you you’ll go above and beyond for your job.
 
I think a lot of boss are like this they don’t care about animals they don’t class them like family or kids. Small offices seem to be the worst for this type of behavior years ago my mam worked in a small office and they wouldn’t give you a day off to pts a dog and expect you in the next day and to be normal. There is some great companys that would give some time off to someone sick pet. I would definitely change jobs especially since you don’t seem to get any holidays it seems they are giving it to the other person and not you which isn’t right and isn’t allowed legally because you’re entitled to so many days off a year. I know a girl that got fired from 2 jobs because of the amount of time she took off due to horses related things.
 
When a work colleague found out I was paying for Lari to be at retirement (he was incredulous you had to pay- he thought it should be free) he asked my why I didn't put him to sleep. I replied that I was very fortunate I was in a position to keep him and get another and he said " but why would you if you can't ride, he's a waste of space". 😡😡

No he's not. He's my everything....
 
Alwaysmoretoknow said:
For context I have not had 1 sick day in the 3 years I've worked there, had 2 days off when my mum died and no time off when I lost my 2 cats and doggy so I hardly treat turning up at work in a 'casual' manner.

Will now be looking for a new job.
AITA?
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Definitely not.

Sounds like your boss is taking you for granted. A very grave mistake to make. Hope El Ponio is still doing well.
 
I'm going to go against the grain here and say I would not expect time off work for an animal's illness. I would ask for it (as holiday, or to work the time back up) and hope my employers would be understanding, and of course I would have to risk losing my job if they refused and I needed to be with said animal, but I would never expect. Maybe I'm old fashioned.
 
Hackback said:
I'm going to go against the grain here and say I would not expect time off work for an animal's illness. I would ask for it (as holiday, or to work the time back up) and hope my employers would be understanding, and of course I would have to risk losing my job if they refused and I needed to be with said animal, but I would never expect. Maybe I'm old fashioned.
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How would you manage if you worked in a school, where time away from work is dictated to you?
 
I've been really lucky that all of my managers have been accommodating when I've needed last minute leave/to book leave for animal related emergencies. This has included leaving while at the office and receiving a call and arriving for a morning meeting having not slept thrn taking leave after meeting to return to sick horse.

I've always used leave. I've never been given "special leave" that parents can use for sick kid situations (think it's either 4x or 4 days a year iirc). I don't have a problem with that. As much as I don't like kids and have never wanted them I can see what hard work they are (& most of it falls to women to manage around everything else). I would always use leave or if no leave left take unpaid.

My current manager is practically an expert on cellulitis, colic, laminitis, abscesses, teeth and now cancer and IBD. Everything he knows he's learnt against his will!!

My manager isn't an animal person at all. He thinks I'm odd and, for obvious reason, can't understand why anyone would have horses. However he couldn't be any more understanding or accommodating. Loads of equally not animally office people are checking in about Chip and being lovely. They don't understand it so equate it to having kids. The downside to all of this is they think that I think of my animals as my children. I don't, and I'd die before referring to them as fur babies or similar, but it's a small price to pay for getting leave at the drop of a hat whenever a horse next decides to emotionally and financially ruin me!
 
Alwaysmoretoknow said:
So this morning I noticed my little 28yo shettie looked a little off. Not eating new bit of grass on the strip grazing (unheard of for a Shetland!) and standing apart from the other 2, shifting her weight from one hind leg to the other and I could see her abdominal muscles clenching periodically. Immediately ruled out lami (not typical signs and no pulses or warm feet) and suspected mild colic. Immediately called work to let them know I had an emergency.

Called vet quick smart who came out in half an hour and confirmed mild spasmodic colic. IV pain relief and Buscopan given. Advised to walk gently round paddock periodically and observe.

Informed work that I had a sick pony and might not be in or would certainly be late (depending on how she seemed) and would only be in for a few hours (much against my better judgement but work at solicitors doing conveyancing accounts and 3 out of 5 colleagues on leave - really poor planning as it takes 2 people to send out payments!) so was trying to balance pony's welfare against work responsibilities.

So get into work and blast through completions and say I'm leaving at 3 to check on pony.

Get call from boss berating me for 1. Coming in late 2. Planning to leave early and 3. (best of all!) being 'irresponsible ' for not having someone to step in to look after horses if there was a problem when I should be at work. Also said 'you know I'm an animal lover' - really? Not from how you are behaving! Banged on about contractual obligations so pointed out I would be in breech of welfare obligations to leave colicing pony untreated and there were other people who could step in to authorise payments in an emergency which it was including her who was only titting about at home.

So are you actually saying that none of your employees should have and sort of aminals if you live alone - what absolute bollix.

Apparently 'we are going to pick this up later'. Can't wait. I think she owes ME an apology for their shitty management and lack of empathy or they can shove their job where no recruitment consultant would fear to tread.

For context I have not had 1 sick day in the 3 years I've worked there, had 2 days off when my mum died and no time off when I lost my 2 cats and doggy so I hardly treat turning up at work in a 'casual' manner.

Will now be looking for a new job.
AITA?
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What a nasty piece of work, would he act the same way if you were having to rush home as your child was sick???

I think not - cant stand people like that, people thinking oh their just horses don't get so worked up about them.

Think I would tell him what he can do with his job.
 
I get it, our animals are part of our family. But please sometimes take a step back and think about it from the manager’s point of view (mine). No, I genuinely can’t afford to give you paid compassionate leave above your holiday entitlement to care for your sick/injured animals, but I will allow you to take it from your leave entitlement.

But this does put a strain on the business - we have a block leave system so that leave is balanced across the year, everybody gets time off and there are enough people to do the work, so if we grant additional leave something has to give, and that usually ends up with me and my boss losing our days off to cover.

There are some workplaces where you just can’t leave early to deal with routine vet appointments because vital services then won’t be delivered.

So please, not all managers are heartless when they say no. Juggling everybody’s needs is hard but my boss and I do try - often to our detriment.

Perfect example today. Just been advised that one of my part time supervisors is not coming in because her daughter’s hamster died last night. Upsetting, yes. So they are buying a new hamster for the 16 year old this morning but she can’t come in for a shift starting at 1600 today as a result. I don’t think I am being unreasonable by asking why she can’t work today, but apparently I am.

Anyway, I have lost my day off and am now working the legal maxim8m of 13 days in a row.
 
View said:
I get it, our animals are part of our family. But please sometimes take a step back and think about it from the manager’s point of view (mine). No, I genuinely can’t afford to give you paid compassionate leave above your holiday entitlement to care for your sick/injured animals, but I will allow you to take it from your leave entitlement.

But this does put a strain on the business - we have a block leave system so that leave is balanced across the year, everybody gets time off and there are enough people to do the work, so if we grant additional leave something has to give, and that usually ends up with me and my boss losing our days off to cover.

There are some workplaces where you just can’t leave early to deal with routine vet appointments because vital services then won’t be delivered.

So please, not all managers are heartless when they say no. Juggling everybody’s needs is hard but my boss and I do try - often to our detriment.

Perfect example today. Just been advised that one of my part time supervisors is not coming in because her daughter’s hamster died last night. Upsetting, yes. So they are buying a new hamster for the 16 year old this morning but she can’t come in for a shift starting at 1600 today as a result. I don’t think I am being unreasonable by asking why she can’t work today, but apparently I am.

Anyway, I have lost my day off and am now working the legal maxim8m of 13 days in a row.
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Nope, that looks like taking the pss.

But... does the daughter have mental health issues or something? Just trying to see why a 4pm start couldn't be achieved, when a new hamster was bought in the morning. If the daughter was too upset to leave? A danger to herself?
 
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View said:
I get it, our animals are part of our family. But please sometimes take a step back and think about it from the manager’s point of view (mine). No, I genuinely can’t afford to give you paid compassionate leave above your holiday entitlement to care for your sick/injured animals, but I will allow you to take it from your leave entitlement
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The experience i talked about i was not expecting it as compassionate leave but i did need to leave early and would work the following day to catch up as needed. I frequently worked extra hours unpaid anyway including some unpaid travel time so a little flexibility on both sides would go a long way.

In another job i frequently worked late to cover for other peoples childcare emergencies and the law protects that though it doesn't have to be paid. Another wanted doctor's appointments to be at the weekends and evenings.

I do think there's an argument for some sort of generic domestic emergency leave allowance . It could be used for things like taking a dog to the vet but also for a burst pipe or waiting in for the broadband engineer. Single people have no choice but have to deal with these things themselves and it's really difficult when your boss says no.
 
Elf On A Shelf said:
I've rung the boss just after 6am in tears asking if they had drugs on the yard to give my horse after he got beaten up by the bastard stallion. She didn't bat an eye and came flying along with some stab-able stuff.

Safe to say I wasn't in work that day as GrayMo was pts.
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It's terrible it ended the way it did with GrayMo, but I love so much what your boss did.
 
criso said:
The experience i talked about i was not expecting it as compassionate leave but i did need to leave early and would work the following day to catch up as needed. I frequently worked extra hours unpaid anyway including some unpaid travel time so a little flexibility on both sides would go a long way.

In another job i frequently worked late to cover for other peoples childcare emergencies and the law protects that though it doesn't have to be paid. Another wanted doctor's appointments to be at the weekends and evenings.

I do think there's an argument for some sort of generic domestic emergency leave allowance . It could be used for things like taking a dog to the vet but also for a burst pipe or waiting in for the broadband engineer. Single people have no choice but have to deal with these things themselves and it's really difficult when your boss says no.
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I agree, I have never asked for paid special/compassionate leave.

One remarkable boss refused me leave to go to my grandads funeral, 200 miles away. Just normal annual leave. Apparently he didn't need to grant me leave as a grandad was not a close relation (mum, dad, child, sibling). I mainly wanted to go for my poor old mum, who then had to travel 3 hours on a train into London on her own, spend all day travelling alone, go to the funeral, and then return alone. I pleaded but was told no.

This is why I was so knocked sideways when I got 5 days special leave, without expecting or asking, when Rigsby was ill. Very different cultures in both working environments. Very different loyalty. In one job, I started doing it for lofty reasons, ended up doing it for the money only. The other one, I carried on doing it even when I didn't need to and still go in as a volunteer now.

I do understand childcare issues, but for example, we had a part to play in the Olympics in 2012. Way back in 2011 we were told of these responsibilities. It wasn't easy to sort out the animals but with almost a year's notice, it was possible. One person with a child said no. No childcare. How can childcare not be arranged with a full year of notice??? The child was not ill or with additional needs that would be tricky to fulfil. Our role was such that we could expect to occasionally work out of area, including stay-overs.

My understanding is that an emergency with childcare is where something happens and you need to react immediately. I don't expect parents to have a stand in on speed dial. But, for something with notice I do expect that both normal animal care and child care can be arranged. I would imagine 3 days notice would suffice for most families. The difference would be for very sick children/animals, where there is a danger of long term harm or death. In that case, I would expect employers to be flexible.

Sadly, only kids are accounted for in law. Some parents hold that like a badge, or shield to shield them from unpopular tasks. My experience anyway!
 
View said:
I get it, our animals are part of our family. But please sometimes take a step back and think about it from the manager’s point of view (mine). No, I genuinely can’t afford to give you paid compassionate leave above your holiday entitlement to care for your sick/injured animals, but I will allow you to take it from your leave entitlement.

But this does put a strain on the business - we have a block leave system so that leave is balanced across the year, everybody gets time off and there are enough people to do the work, so if we grant additional leave something has to give, and that usually ends up with me and my boss losing our days off to cover.

There are some workplaces where you just can’t leave early to deal with routine vet appointments because vital services then won’t be delivered.

So please, not all managers are heartless when they say no. Juggling everybody’s needs is hard but my boss and I do try - often to our detriment.

Perfect example today. Just been advised that one of my part time supervisors is not coming in because her daughter’s hamster died last night. Upsetting, yes. So they are buying a new hamster for the 16 year old this morning but she can’t come in for a shift starting at 1600 today as a result. I don’t think I am being unreasonable by asking why she can’t work today, but apparently I am.

Anyway, I have lost my day off and am now working the legal maxim8m of 13 days in a row.
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I’m another who would not expect compassionate leave for my animals but would certainly hope that my boss would be accommodating in an emergency and give me the time off unpaid or use up my holidays. (Which he would thankfully)
I was obviously heart broken after I had my horses PTS but I was in work the next day and tried to act as normal as I could so it wasn’t awkward for anyone.
 
View said:
I get it, our animals are part of our family. But please sometimes take a step back and think about it from the manager’s point of view (mine). No, I genuinely can’t afford to give you paid compassionate leave above your holiday entitlement to care for your sick/injured animals, but I will allow you to take it from your leave entitlement.

But this does put a strain on the business - we have a block leave system so that leave is balanced across the year, everybody gets time off and there are enough people to do the work, so if we grant additional leave something has to give, and that usually ends up with me and my boss losing our days off to cover.

There are some workplaces where you just can’t leave early to deal with routine vet appointments because vital services then won’t be delivered.

So please, not all managers are heartless when they say no. Juggling everybody’s needs is hard but my boss and I do try - often to our detriment.

Perfect example today. Just been advised that one of my part time supervisors is not coming in because her daughter’s hamster died last night. Upsetting, yes. So they are buying a new hamster for the 16 year old this morning but she can’t come in for a shift starting at 1600 today as a result. I don’t think I am being unreasonable by asking why she can’t work today, but apparently I am.

Anyway, I have lost my day off and am now working the legal maxim8m of 13 days in a row.
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But OP did go in to work, even though her pony was ill, just a bit late, hurried as much as they could to get as much work done as possible, and wanted to leave at 15. Which was much more than they would've gotten if OP had chosen to not go in at all.

In the case you mentioned, sure, even if the hamster really died at night, not evening or day, maybe they didn't get enough sleep, but even so, it doesn't sound completely unreasonable to think they could've gotten a few extra hours sleep before noon, went and bought a new hamster with the daughter, and still have had time to get to work at 16. However, the block leave system at your workplace sounds very inflexible, and vulnerable.
Hypothetically, what if it had been the daughter that had died, and not her hamster. I presume that the worker in that scenario would've been allowed to stay home not only today, without also tomorrow, and more days than that, and if you're legally already on your maximum 13:th workday in a row, and presumably your boss can't either work unlimited amount of days to cover...
 
Hackback said:
I'm going to go against the grain here and say I would not expect time off work for an animal's illness. I would ask for it (as holiday, or to work the time back up) and hope my employers would be understanding, and of course I would have to risk losing my job if they refused and I needed to be with said animal, but I would never expect. Maybe I'm old fashioned.
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This. My previous employer was absolutely fantastic when it came to time off for the horse. But it was understood that I’d either work the time back or take it as a day off - as was pretty much expected for a parent too.
 
Interesting thread.

My feelings are this: bosses are colossally stupid to not consider the feelings of their staff who have animal emergencies.

Why? Because your staff *are* how you treat them. Treat them well and they’ll be hard working and loyal. Treat them like shit and you’ll get shit in return.

There might be the odd one who takes advantage.

My old boss was a PITA about silly small things (leave a dirty cup in the sink and he’d go ballistic 🙄) but when any important happened he just said ‘go’

And so I stayed for 15 years until I retired.

It might be inconvenient for the business. But if that member of staff is a hard worker then you’d be daft not to help and keep them.
 
My work were great when my dad died. We technically get 5 days compassionate leave and I had a few days extra plus working from home time. They've given other staff working from home time for vet appointments too. I would like to think they would do the same for me if I needed it, but I would also offer to make up hours by doing shorter lunches etc. However, I do get really fed up that some people totally take the p**s with the time off for this kind of thing, both for animal issues and childcare. One person in particular. Everyone knows they have a great family support network round but always seem to need time off/early dart for childcare when we all know they are actually going out to do something fun. The same happens when they need to 'work from home'. This person refuses to put their child in pre or post school clubs claiming cash flow issues, but has an expensive new car on finance and spends loads on other, non-essential things.

As a single person, I'm fed up with covering for certain people with kids. If there are flexible working policies for emergencies, they should be available to all staff based on individual needs and not discriminate against the childless or single folk with other commitments. Management should also plan annual leave sensibly and not have too many staff off at once so that they can't cope with emergency, unforeseen circumstances (ours definitely don't do this).
 
I work in a Solicitors also but in family law. I think your boss is being completely unreasonable. It is down to them as management to ensure there are adequate staffing arrangements to ensure work is covered. If they f*cked up by allowing too many people annual leave at once, that is their problem I'm afraid.

I understand the demands of work and deadlines and in an ideal world everything is done on time. But life doesn't work like that. Emergencies happen, children are poorly, cars break down, animals have unexpected accidents/illnesses and FAMILY will ALWAYS come first.

I am so lucky I have a boss and work for a company that understands this. I've rang my boss in tears because I thought my husband's gelding had fractured his leg (which luckily turned out to just be deep bruising). There was no interegation, no demands to know when I would be in, just an understanding that my horses are my everything and I needed to be with one of them more than I needed to be at work.

I wouldn’t expect paid leave and would always take it as unpaid, work time back, or take from leave entitlement. The other girls I work with frequently need to take time off or WFH for their children being ill. I don't resent it just because I don't have children of my own, but I do expect to be shown the same courtesy for my own personal commitments to my horses, and luckily my employer is completely understanding of this.
 
I can see both points of view, I think it depends on the type of work one does. Although all jobs are equally important some are easier to do flexi-time and make up hours.
As a manager, if i had an emergency and couldn't go into work in the morning, the night sister would have to stay, after a 12 hour shift, until another senior would/could come in to take charge, therefore relying on someone else to do overtime, also there are the associated cost implications of expensive and availability of agency staff.

It is very dependent on who is in charge at the time, what the staffing levels are, reason for absence, all contribute to what reception you get when phoning in with any type of emergency, but they always get it as now adays they say they are not coming in, not ask if they can have the day off, peoples expectations, work ethics and attitudes have changed. It is normally discussed after the event how the absence is recorded.

I have been covered when i had an emergency and had to leave asap - 15 horses running loose as a tree had come down taking down the fence with it, but luckily it was daytime so enough 'managers' around to cover.
 
twiggy2 said:
I am genuinely surprised at most people's replies on here.
I wouldn't expect time of for my pets being ill etc, it must be a nightmare for managers and puts so much more pressure on then to find cover and possibly to then find extra care for their own pets.
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So what are people supposed to do? Let their animals suffer? Not call a vet? It is not always possible to find someone else to be with your animals in an emergency.

Also would you say the same if it was someone's child or elderly relative for example? I highly doubt it. Animals are no less of a commitment.
 
criso said:
The experience i talked about i was not expecting it as compassionate leave but i did need to leave early and would work the following day to catch up as needed. I frequently worked extra hours unpaid anyway including some unpaid travel time so a little flexibility on both sides would go a long way.

In another job i frequently worked late to cover for other peoples childcare emergencies and the law protects that though it doesn't have to be paid. Another wanted doctor's appointments to be at the weekends and evenings.
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My post was in way aimed at you.
nagblagger said:
I can see both points of view, I think it depends on the type of work one does. Although all jobs are equally important some are easier to do flexi-time and make up hours.
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Exactly.

@FinnishLapphund Block leave isn‘t inflexible. The purpose is to ensure .that we never have too many off at once and it does leave some headroom for the unforeseen. Staff know their block dates 2 years in advance, can swap with colleagues
and nobody gets stuck with blocks in term time every year.

Unfortunately this time, as well as the block leave I have 3 supervisors away on compassionate leave.

@Red-1 no issues with this 16yo. I’ve met her and she did two weeks work experience with us last year.
 
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