I Need Help Please

TheresaW

TheresaW

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I own 2 horses, Dolly, who I’ve had for 5 years, and Mac who I’ve owned for 3. At the moment, I am really not enjoying riding Mac, and as well as making me feel guilty, I am also starting to get a bit upset about it. He does nothing wrong, out of the 2 of them, Dolly can be the bigger handful, but at the moment, I feel if I never rode him again, I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. I love him to bits, and we have a good relationship on the ground, I would never get rid of him, but I just don’t want to ride him. We are doing the Frensham sponsored ride on Sunday, and as I am babysitting one of the kids from the yard, I am doing it on him as he is the quieter one, and I can honestly say I am dreading it. I rode him last night, and I was tense and nervous! The kids down the yard all ask to ride him as they love him so much, and his sharer never has a problem. How can I get over this? I fell off him the week before last which possibly isn’t helping right now, but I have fallen off Doll loads of times and don’t feel like this. Before I bought him, I used to ride him once a week as he was pretty much abandoned, and I used to have fun and enjoy it. The only thing that has really changed with him is that he has been diagnosed with arthritis and maybe his way of going has changed a bit, but that isn’t his fault and TBH, the arthritis was there when I bought him, we just didn’t know. How can I rebuild our ridden relationship?

Sorry for the essay, but this has been building for a while.
 
That has crossed my mind, but I have no problems with other people riding him, and normally am out with them, so know when he is struggling. He does have off days, but on vets advice, he is still walked out to keep him mobile.
 
I thik I know what you mean. My boy was diagnosed with ligament problems and since coming back into work I'm not enjoying riding him as much. I think it's because I am concerned about his future, and I can't help but think of all the things we're missing out on - competitions, jumping etc. Was the diagnosis a shock? I think my wariness at riding stems from the emotional rollercoaster we went through with diagnosis and treatment. Maybe just give yourself some time and try to relax and enjoy the fun ride.
 
He's 12. I wasn't overly shocked as he was on and off lame for a few months, and I suspected arthritis because of the way he would improve once out of the stable and moving about. First few times I got vet out, he trotted up 100% sound too!
 
Sounds to me like you need to go and have some fun too, I think that Sunday will do you the world of good. Fingers crossed you have a good time
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Go for the fun ride, bring a neckstrap or put a martingale on if you are nervous (I do this on my mare, its just a comfort thing to know its there, I never use it though) and cling to it until you feel a lil better. Your probibily just worried about his arthuritis. I used to ride a lil hairy cob that was crippled with arthritus and his owner was afraid to ride him. I used to bareback him down the road and round fields and the more he moved the better he got, he strugggled at first but then improved vastly. He went from barely being able to walk with me on him to being able to go for a canter around the field. Just go to the ride with a positive attitude and have fun
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Are you driving at the weekend? If not, borrow my hipflask and sloe gin - far better than rescue remedy
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I used to have a few slurps when hunting Breeze - amazing how we had more fun.

As others said put on a neck strap - I still have one on Chancer - haven't used it for ages but makes me feel secure.

Alternatively - come and borrow the western for him - if you fall out of that I'll eat Mac hooves and all.

Have tried to PM you - you need to have a clear out.
 
Why dont you go to the ride giving yourself the goal that you will ride for a little bit, see how you feel, maybe carry on for a bit more or if you are not enjoying it jump off and lead him back.
 
All being well, I am riding to the halfway point, and then sharer is taking over! After coming on here this morning and reading all your suggestions, I feel a bit better. (I have actually cried about it this morning as I feel so bad about him, I do love him to bits). Am trying to borrow a neck strap and am determined we will go out and have fun!
 
You can just sling a spare stirrup leather round his neck if you can't find a neckstrap
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You WILL have fun - the anticipation is always much worse than the actual event!
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What about some PAX spray? I have no idea if it works (is supposed to block out smells you give off when you are nervous so that the horses doesn't pick up on it) but my sister used to use it so that the horse didn't pick up on her nervousness - though I think it was almost certainly a psychological thing
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The good thing is, I have done the ride before, so do at least know what to expect. Mac has done it before too, he was ridden around by a 12 year old last year, which really makes me even madder at myself.

Thanks for the stirrup leather idea!
 
I cannot belive I missed this ......... the obvious solution is to SEND HIM TO ME!!!!!!!!!

Seriously It does sound like you ned to get out there and remember that riding him was and still can be lots of fun!
 
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