Just for fun -What's your most idiotic fall?

tankgirl1

tankgirl1

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I managed to get both boots stuck on a gate as we were going through it, my mare kept going, I slid unelegently off her bum and ended up hanging upside down from the gatehole whilst she buggered off grazing!

Best bit was a farmer saw me, stopped his quad, stared at me for 30 secs, and then drove off :p

I have some cracking bruises on my legs :D
 
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I had an almost fall yesterday at a standstill when the horse shook. My friend has kindly put it all over FB.
 
Didn't bother taking off my(too tight for riding in) waterproof trousers one very rainy day as thought I would only go for a quick hack. Was on my old very reliable horse and all was fine until he put his head down for some very tasty grass, this pulled me forward over the pommel and I couldn't move my legs back Far enough to get back into the saddle because of the darn tight trousers.
I ended up sliding down the poor things neck face first.

Slightly embarrassing.
 
Horse 1 - I was standing up in the stirrups looking over a fence, horse did something silly and I fell off (this was at a walk!).

Same horse - we were cantering briskly along and there was a stick in the middle of the path, I thought "he will go left or right" so I was ready for him. He stopped dead and I flew over his head (I mean wtf).

Horse 2 - standing at mounting block, slipped and fell off the block and under the horse.

Same horse - trotting along slightly downhill with me in half seat horse perfectly balanced (naturally). A deer crossed - horse looked up, I looked up, horse tripped and kept on tripping then somersaulted and rolled into a ditch. I just piled face first into the ground (like a bag of wet washing) and hit my head on a stone (I spent ages trying to find where horse was bleeding before I realised it was dripping from my head *sigh* the impact had cracked the hat).
 
Standing still in a lesson in the school whilst instructor explaining an exercise he wanted me to do around the arena and to check I had it right I started gesticulating with my hand to confirm the circles and direction he wanted me to head off in and what he wanted me to do. My hand had my crop in it and I waved it forward into the horse's sight - he went straight up in fright and I slid off the back. :D Would be a day when the instructor had a young chap with him who was shadowing as he wanted to become an instructor too :) They did manage to restrain their laughter but not their broad grins.

Have also come off two other times at standstill (a spook and a naughty pony bucking when told to go forward) - seems to be my forte :)
 
Coming back from a hack on our bombproof ride and drive piebald cob, I was almost within sight of home. Walking on a long rein, I was chatting to sis who was riding alongside on a much more challenging mare. Suddenly the cob spotted a monster lurking in a piece of rolled-up carpet, awaiting collection next to a dustbin.
She side-stepped, tripped and fell down a rut in the track. Because I wasn't concentrating, I slid down her shoulder and landed at her feet. She looked down, checked that I was ok and then studiously looked the other way (I swear she blushed) as I climbed up her leg.
I never did work out whether she was more embarassed about my antics or about being frightened by the carpet. And the most astonishing thing about the whole episode was that sister's mare, who usually needed the cob to give her confidence, just stood like a rock.
 
There's so many to choose from :) I managed to fall straight over the other side of pony when mounting at a little RC show, twice! I was so nervous but I had to show my 9 year old daughter that this pony would do a round of jumps and not be eliminated at the first. And we did, it has been a running joke since that whenever we have one of those light bulb moments it is another "slowest clear round in the World" Still have the pony and she's been a wonderful animal.
 
Most ridiculous looking - mounting early in the morning - obviously not quite awake - and straight over the other side

One that made me giggle most - my excitable horse jumped a small jump in the school and I failed to get control before the hedge along the short side - he went right, I ended up sticking out of the hedge...

And the one that put me most in my place.. My daughter decided her horse was being a bit tricky over some small xc jumps. Me 'don't be ridiculous- hand him over to me, I'll sort him out' .... Well i did, if sorting out looks like... Approach jump- stop - rider kicks like mad - massive cat leap - rider unseated- horse finishes job with series of bucks - rider: 'what day is it? How did I get here?' ...
 
Haha! Loving these stories.

Before my chestnut had learnt to stand at a block and before she had bulked out enough to stop her saddle slipping when I mounted from the ground I was trying to get on her when noone was around for a stirrup hold, eventually I got her close enough to a wall to hop on, but it was from the wrong side. I slightly over estimated how much spring I would need and jumped clear over the top of her. She just turned and looked at me sprawled on the floor.

Another time I was cantering along popping a hedge or two between the stubble fields when my lovely pony stopped dead, I flew over their head and somehow flipped to face them so I was hanging with a branch wedged under my body protector, I couldn't reach the ground and had to unzip and drop to the floor.
 
A lot of years ago, I was riding my games pony bareback, tried to lean down to pick something up, and just continued sliding down to the floor, finishing up with my knee hooked over her back and my other foot on the floor. Good job she was only 13.1hh!

I shot off the front of the same pony at Pony Club camp, into a water jump, taking her bridle off as I went. PC instructor was deeply unimpressed.

I also vaulted right over the top of her at games practice, didn't even touch the saddle on the way over, and got lovely grass stains all up my best white jodhs, which I was wearing while my usual ones were in the wash.
 
I was ducking down to go under a tree/thick branch, I sat up too early and wasn't underneath it. As soon as I as t up it was right there and knocked me right off 😂 and I broke my arm on the landing, I was only walking!
 
On my part loan sturdy highland, I was trotting along (slowly) and next min I was on the floor. Still to this day don't know what happened but it was a long standing joke with everyone on the yard who all agreed - 'who falls off Hamish???' Ha ha!
 
Just remembered another one.
I was riding a donkey bareback, owner wanted it rideable, it wasn't schooled at all but fairly amenable. My feet were kicking the back of his knees. We finished the session and as we stood by the gate he turned his head, put his nose under my knee and then just walked out from under me.
 
When I was a teenager a friend's yard was holding a little 'gymkhana' and they did a class for complete novices/friends and family of the riders where you were supposed to go from one end of the paddock and back and the first one back won. Looking back it sounds idiotic and an accident waiting to happen but anyway...I didn't know anyone on the yard so I got on my friends pony, pretending I couldn't ride, I was sat waiting to start so smug thinking I'd trick everyone and win the 'race' ;) Signalled to start so I did a halt to canter, lost my stirrup and ended up hanging on to the pony's neck. Had to get carried out of the paddock with a broken ankle....

Boy did I show them...!!
 
These are great :D

As a teenager, I kept my horse with two other girls - they were my best friends and we rode everywhere together. One day we were cantering up a path and somehow managed a synchronised fall..

We were cantering three in a row, one after another. The mare in front was spooked, and suddenly stopped and spun sideways so that she was blocking the path, ditching my friend in the middle of the path. This was closely followed by my second friend who couldn't pull the breaks soon enough so her gelding flew head on into the sideways mare, whilst the rider flew over the gelding's head, over the sideways mare and on a heap in the floor, on top of the other friend.

Thankfully my adorable little man just stopped behind them and looked at his embarrassing horsey friends with amazement, as if to say "what are you doing?!" We were laughing so hard they couldn't get up! Oh when you wish you had a head cam!

..wait does this count - I didn't actually fall?! :D
 
I was to mount a lesson mare in a field without my usual mounting block. The mare in question was huge, I am short, the stirrup didn't help and swinging on was out of the question. So I fetched a small, wobbly chair/bar-stool-thingy from the stable and lined her up to that. As I proceeded to push myself up from the chair, one leg in the stirrup, the damn thing wobbled away and I fell back, catching it between my legs and proceeding to bruise one of them badly. Don't ask... The mare, bless her, just stood and smirked at me.

Take two...rinse and repeat. Only this time the chair (clearly, possessed by the devil!) came apart and I cut my other leg up on the remains.
By then I was too proud to step back, somehow managed to crawl up on the mare from the ground and proceeded with my lesson, quietly bleeding into my boot.
 
As a youngster having a bareback jumping lesson on a fat barrel shaped pony. Pinged over the jump landing on her neck, pony stopped in the corner of the school and put her head down depositing me in a water trough. It was a rather deep trough and I was a rather small child! All that could be seen of me was my boots until the instructor yanked me out!
 
I was walking through some woods with low hanging branches. Ducked to get under but my left leg got caught on some tree. I stopped and horse kept going!

Got dragged off. Horse panicked as I still had hold of the reins and reversed backwards over my legs and dragged me a bit down a gravel hill. Had taken the skin off my shoulder, one knee twice the size and the other thigh nice horse shoe shaped bruise on it. Most injuries from least spectacular fall!

Remember feeling fine then halfway back to yard my shoulder was stinging then by the time I got back I was in agony!
 
Mine was when I flung myself off before I got decked into the wall of the school - I'd smacked my horse's bum to wake him up and he took exception to it. 🙄

I landed on my feet and snapped my tibia up near my knee in the process.
I was on crutches for nearly three months and could ride properly for five. 😞
 
Wayyyy back, I had a 13.2 piebald pony. She was very good, honest and reliable. Doing some XC at PC camp, she thought she'd just 'try it on' at the ditch and sort of stopped (more like a brief hesitation and side step)... cue me, not ready for her to say 'no', falling off... landing on my feet, but not in balance and then falling (stepping) backwards into the ditch, all in slow mo - can still see it now. Disgusting black watery ditch and I was totally covered. What was worse, NO-ONE helped me out ... well they couldn't for being doubled over in hysterics!! Even the pony laughed I'm sure!
 
I was at a big show in a ridden M&M class on my young stallion. The Welsh cob next to him upset him him and he reared up. My stirrups came off the saddle and I ended up stood on the floor behind his tail with my feet still in the stirrups and still hold of the reins.
 
Twice I have been forced to ride my Mini Shetland, by the little darling diving between my legs and carting me off backwards. The first time it was a slow motion fall face first over his tail, from a trot. The second it was from a rear facing canter. I thought I would be clever this time and just put my feet on the floor. Good plan, he disappeared, but though my feet were still, the rest of my body wasn't. I ended up flat on my back. Lol.
 
Got "branched" by a donkey, he was right I could never have ducked under that branch.

Asked during the most disunited canter for a change (thinking it would fix it) both him and I face planted the sand, and looked at each other rather dazed afterwards!

Walking on a long rein out a hack, horse tripped over his feet and we both hit the deck. Another " eh?" moment :p

And actually my worst fall - I would give hay in the shelter, then ride horse bare back to the gate for hard feed. I would jump on, no tack of course, and he would trot down to the gate with me aboard for the feed. It was a pitch black, frozen mid winter evening, I gave the hay, hopped on and was expecting the usual trot to the gate. He spooked, tanked and I flew off the back, landed directly on my bum and fractured my coccyx. I lay in the below freezing evening, for what seemed like an eternity, slowly crawling to the fence line. I couldn't sit for weeks, couldn't sit for long for years, had to mention it when giving birth, and still have a completely numb patch. Looking back - It was incredibly idiotic!
 
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Horse slipped over onto its right side on ice, I tried to leap clear to the right but my left foot caught in stirrup. Desperately tried to kick it free while we were both on the ground but stuck fast. Horse decided to get up again, left stirrup now over top of saddle and me suspended upside down by left foot on right hand side of horse!

Foot still wedged fast so they only way to escape my predicament was to take my boot off. Of course because it was cold the boots were covered by thermal chaps which were covered by long coat all of which had to come off before I could unzip the boot..... Yes I had to undress whilst suspended upside down! Goodness knows what any passersby would have thought :)

Luckily I had hung onto the reins and the horse was an old head on young shoulders so I had the luxury of doing my strip-tease at a slow walk and not a flat out gallop.....
 
PC dressage test, horse was due to be shod, weather was hot, grass was long and slippery - horse slipped going round a 20m circle and fell right over, landing on my ankle. I felt ridiculous!
 
Getting on Dolly one day. At the mounting block, as I swung my leg over her back, she moved an inch, and I fell straight off the other side.

Another time, out on Mac, 16.1, with 2 friends on 14hh ponies. We were off the tracks in the forest, and they were in front. They went under some branches, which I knew we wouldn't fit under, so tried to take Mac around the other side of the tree. He was having none of it, so I laid as flat as I could alongside his neck. Sadly to no avail, and I was pushed off his bum, and landed in the muddiest puddle ever. Was caked in mud, and didn't want to get back into my lovely clean saddle, hence me rubbing my bum up and down a tree trunk, Baloo from jungle book style, whilst Mac looked on bemused.
 
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