Lending a trailer to a friend

[Tiddlypom]

Everyone has their own approach, but I'm firmly in the 'it's only stuff' camp.

Well, yes, but stuff has to be looked after properly if it’s to keep working.

Like my trailer and my clippers, neither are new but they are well maintained.

I wouldn’t be lending to someone who attitude was that they were only ‘stuff’, they are my stuff which I keep maintained, though I appreciate that your post was about lending, not borrowing .

 

[HazuraJane]

Taking delivery tomorrow on a almost-new trailer here, after having had a friend give me the use of hers once in a vet emergency, once to move same horse to long-term care yard.
Where my horses live there are wildfires, and of course in a wildfire I would evacuate mine, then return to evacuate others.
But to go to a show? Transport to a show costs are on the person showing. Just hire someone.
Somehow the expectation that an expensive piece of equipment is available as a loan to an acquaintance or a friendly acquaintance feels entitled to me.

 

[Muddywellies]

Years ago I had an old trailer that I had a loan from the bank to buy. I so loved that little trailer. A 'friend' had arranged to go out and have some fun with her friends on their horses and she phoned me to ask if she could borrow my trailer. I was in a work appointment and couldn't take the call (she didn't work but that's a whole other story) so she railroaded my poor unsuspecting husband into letting her take it. So off went my trailer, not returning till past 10 at night. I religiously cleaned my trailer but as you can guess, it came back filthy. Yes it survived, but she didn't bother cleaning it out and we had to clean it next day. It was all just so wrong. It wasn't an energency, just a whim, and she took advantage of my naive husband to go out to play with her mates. She since borrowed 2 other people's trailers and caused extensive damage to both so I guess I was lucky.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

I probably have 2 people I would lend a trailer or horse box to same with clippers, been stung and learnt the hard way so most people would get a no from me I am afraid.

 

[doodle]

I have also had the issue that someone (a friend of a friend who I didn’t even know) borrowed my trailer. They brought it back and literally unhitched it in middle of the yard, not even to one side out of the road, and drove off stating that they couldn’t reverse so couldn’t park it. They didn’t bother to remove the poo either!

 

[Crazy_cat_lady]

I dont have a trailer but it's an expensive item so unless it was an emergency/ important like a vet emergency/ visit I wouldn't be lending it. For something like a standard event she will have to hire one or not go.

I won't even lend my clippers. They are now discontinued but invaluable to me as they are quiet and I can clip a fair part of my nervous welsh D with them (though this time he decided he didn't fancy being clipped.) Plus they aren't cheap. YO was kindly going to let me borrow hers when they stopped mid clip and I felt scared as they felt quite large in my hand and I was so scared I'd break them. Plus the fact they weren't mine I felt an extra responsibility. Fortunately it was just my circuit breaker needing resetting but if I had needed hers, even though I'd only needed them for half a clip id have volunteered to get the blades sharpened at my effort/ expense and also returned them to her in decent condition eg brushed off etc as she didn't have to lend them to me so I'd want to repay her.

I think i used to borrow old yo's clippers once a year before I got my own but it was always with the obvious condition if I damaged them i paid to replace/ fix them. And also check with her if she wanted me to pay for blade sharpening

No one rides my horse bar me either

 

[Afon_34]

We don’t lend our trailer out, if a close friend needed it then we would tow them & rarely take other people now as we once took a ‘friend’ to a competition with us & their horse kicked the shit out of our trailer- no sorry, no offer to fix etc. But it is hard as we haven’t always had transport and used to rely on lifts or hiring boxes so do know how it is on the other hand too but then we look after what we borrow, unfortunately not everyone does!

 

[Henry02]

There’s very few people that I will lend my things to. I’ve had my trailer left full of sh1te and battered after a horse has kicked it... this was from someone just helping themselves to it.

judge rinder has had a similar case on this week with a hired camper van. Ideally a written agreement is needed with records of the condition of the transport was before and after loaning. If they don’t pay up you then have a court case

 

[McFluff]

As others have said, there are a few people who I know have the same approach in life as I do, so I would help them out. None have a car suited to tow my trailer, so when I've helped out, I've done the towing.
I enjoy helping out my friends who don't have transport - but I am careful in who I help - they are all friends and people I know well (and who I know would help me if they could).
There is always the challenge of injury - my friends horse managed to injure himself last time in my trailer. I was mortified. Thankfully it was only a small nick, and we've sorted it to prevent future injury. One worth bearing in mind though. I'm less bothered about damage - that can happen at any time and is fixable, but injury to a horse is a worry for all parties.
I always feel rather grateful when I read these threads that I just don't seem to know any of the self entitled people that some of you have had the mis-fortune to deal with. I can completely see how that would make you just say no to all in future. For me, a minimum requirement is to help clean trailer after use - no help to do that would equal no future transport from me!

 

[Cowpony]

I'm like most - would not lend my lorry or my clippers, but would happily offer to drive a horse in an emergency and do take other people and horses to events I'm going to. Some people just push the envelope. I've agreed to take people out on a couple of occasions when I haven't been riding myself. Found out the hard way when one lot happily let me clear out the lorry (of their tack and kit, as well as the poo!) while they stood and recounted the day's events to their friends on the yard; and then I got a request to take another lot out the following week, as if I was running a horse transport business.

Most people are lovely though - I often take my instructor out with me to competitions (not sure why because she always beats me!) and she never fails to offer me fuel money even though I was going anyway, and will buy me a coffee and offer cake while there. My lorry is so economical I'm sure the coffee costs more than the fuel I've used! And she insists on sweeping the lorry afterwards.

 

[Kat]

I'd be very wary of lending something as expensive as a trailer, even old trailers are an expensive item and so many things can go wrong.

I will happily take a horse that travels well out with mine if I am going somewhere, and I have done so regularly. It is a big responsibility travelling someone else's horse, so I am becoming more wary about doing that as I see more things go not quite to plan. Towing with someone else's horse is much more worrying than towing your own.

I have let other people tow my trailer a couple of times but each time my horse was travelling with theirs. Once due to my tow car being out of action and once due to a friend's trailer being out of action both times were relatively short notice one after a show had been entered and the other when everyone was dressed and packed and ready to leave. Again nerve wracking, and so many potential problems, that I would be cautious about doing it again. It would also depend a lot upon who it was, and what their circumstances were.

I would absolutely offer to help in an emergency although I would prefer to drive myself if possible. I have only offered to completely lend it out once and that was to family.

The thing is that even is everyone is responsible and acting in good faith things can go wrong. It isn't just about whether the other person will pay to repair damage, it is how you would feel if someone's horse was killed or injured in your trailer. Someone on our yard had a horrible accident with a horse going down and getting trapped in a trailer that wasn't theirs. No one's fault the horse just panicked, but the horse was injured, the trailer was trashed, and a person put their safety at risk trying to free the horse, it makes you think.

 

[1523679]

Would you lend them your car for a jolly day out?

yes = no worries, lend them your trailer

no = decline nicely, providing contact details for a local trailer hire provider and wishing them the best of luck for their event

 

[MagicMelon]

I have lent my trailer out to a really close friend who I knew would pay for any damage. But I also lent it out once to a friend (not particularly close one) and her horse spent the entire journey chewing through the rubber on the breast bar. She didnt even offer to replace it! So no, I would never lend it out except to a very close friend you trust.

Is the trailer insured? Id guess probably most arent so what happened if they had an accident with it, would they pay for a new one? Probably not...

 

[AandK]

I have lent my trailer out twice to a friend on the yard, needed as hers was out of action and horse needed to go to the vets. I know she would have paid if any damage was done. The only other person I would consider lending to is the YM, she has lent me her lorry a couple of times when my transport was out of action (dead battery!). I would not lend it to someone I did not know well or trust.

 

[sunnyone]

Times have changed.
When I first had a horse, borrowing a trailer was normal, but you had to fix it before you dared put your horse in it e.g. fix brakes, lights, tyre pressures etc and take it back cleaner than when you got it. Then a friend insisted I went to shows more often, and using his trailer until the horse grew out of it.
When I got my own trailer, then lorry, I expected to loan it occasionally, but after a couple of costly bumps by other people I had to start refusing. Now nobody gets to use my trailer, except us, or a real vet emergency. Shame.

 

[Pippity]

A fellow livery asked if I'd use my box to take her and her pony to the local unaff dressage in a couple of weeks. It's only ten minutes up the road and I like to be helpful, so I said yes. In return, I asked her to be my groom/spare pair of hands/moral support at a show this weekend.

She's just cancelled on me so she can have a lesson.

I'm fighting the urge to be petty and cancel on her a few days before her competition...

 

[ihatework]

A fellow livery asked if I'd use my box to take her and her pony to the local unaff dressage in a couple of weeks. It's only ten minutes up the road and I like to be helpful, so I said yes. In return, I asked her to be my groom/spare pair of hands/moral support at a show this weekend.

She's just cancelled on me so she can have a lesson.

I'm fighting the urge to be petty and cancel on her a few days before her competition...

I reckon she can hack to her show ...

 

[exracehorse]

this.
I have friends, and Friends. I'd lend something like a trailer to some and not others. When I had no transport I was really helped out by the generosity of other people letting me use things, which makes me inclined to want to pay that forward. but they knew I would look after it well and make good any problems and I would only do so with someone who was the same.

Absolutely. I’ve just lent my trailer to a friend so she could get her horse to the vet. I know that if horse put a hoof through the panel, she would be mortified and pay for any repairs. I have other friends who I would definitely not.

 

[ester]

I reckon she can hack to her show ...

'oh sorry, as you cancelled on me I presumed you didn't want my help to go to your show anymore'

 

[MissTyc]

When I lent my old lorry to a friend I was very clear that it was an ancient old friend, to be treated kindly. She burnt out the clutch on a steep hill, got another friend with a trailer to pick up her ponies, and sent me a text to let me know where it was broken down and should she drop round the keys. You couldn't make it up. Maybe it was the clutch's time; maybe not, but that certainly taught me a lesson in trust. My YO used to lend her trailer and it just got bashed around as people reversed into things or the horses kicked about inside. Now we both have new equipment (my 3.5t won't be paid off for a while yet) and we're not sharing. I will always transport a horse to the emergency vet, any time of day or night, that's completely different - but I trust no one.

 

[FourLeafClover]

Up until early this year I had a very good friend. Her horse went lame and needed a lot of veterinary investigations, I had a trailer and a car to tow it and so very happily gave her my time and use of the trailer (with me doing the towing). I think in total it was about 3 or 4 trips to and from the vets, one was an overnight stay for horse so involved an additional drive there and back. The vets is an hour away. So that’s at least 8 hours driving and 8 hours worth of fuel - old thirsty 4x4 towing great big 16.2 so not exactly a light load. Plus the time spent at the vets with her and and the horse.
I never once was offered anything towards my time or my fuel. I was a bit irked at the time but figured we were good friends, and that she would have done the same for me I thought, so maybe it was ok? Well not so much, just a couple of months later said friend essentially shat on me from a great height. I have never been treated so badly by any ‘friend’ before, and to be honest I’m not really over it and often get upset about it.
I don’t think I’ve learned though, I have lent my trailer out since and had no offer in the way of thanks either ? people are the worst. Or maybe it’s me that’s the worst as the common denominator here!
In summary, in the future I wouldn’t let myself get in the same situation where you are continually putting yourself or your hard earned equipment/vehicle/trailer in a position to be abused. Chances are, said person will happily freeload and buggar off leaving you out of pocket and feeling very used! (End of bitter old bag rant)

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

A fellow livery asked if I'd use my box to take her and her pony to the local unaff dressage in a couple of weeks. It's only ten minutes up the road and I like to be helpful, so I said yes. In return, I asked her to be my groom/spare pair of hands/moral support at a show this weekend.

She's just cancelled on me so she can have a lesson.

I'm fighting the urge to be petty and cancel on her a few days before her competition...

Do it I would that's just not a valid reason to let a friend down especially as you have helped her out.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

I really would genuinely try to help most people out if I can but if I get zero back I won't bother anymore.

 

[Equi]

A friend asked me to tow her horse once and I said no way cause I know he’s bonkers. The person who did tow him got the breast bar bent and the horse half way out the back ramp. I have towed other friends horses but he was an ex loan horse so I had towed him many times lol

 

[Flicker]

I would only lend to people I know have the values and financial means to put me right if something goes wrong. I make it clear from the beg that if you broke it, you bought it. So far, apart from a show jacket that took 10 months to come back and was then dumped in a heap outside my stable, it’s worked ok.

 

[Henry02]

Up until early this year I had a very good friend. Her horse went lame and needed a lot of veterinary investigations, I had a trailer and a car to tow it and so very happily gave her my time and use of the trailer (with me doing the towing). I think in total it was about 3 or 4 trips to and from the vets, one was an overnight stay for horse so involved an additional drive there and back. The vets is an hour away. So that’s at least 8 hours driving and 8 hours worth of fuel - old thirsty 4x4 towing great big 16.2 so not exactly a light load. Plus the time spent at the vets with her and and the horse.
I never once was offered anything towards my time or my fuel. I was a bit irked at the time but figured we were good friends, and that she would have done the same for me I thought, so maybe it was ok? Well not so much, just a couple of months later said friend essentially shat on me from a great height. I have never been treated so badly by any ‘friend’ before, and to be honest I’m not really over it and often get upset about it.
I don’t think I’ve learned though, I have lent my trailer out since and had no offer in the way of thanks either ? people are the worst. Or maybe it’s me that’s the worst as the common denominator here!
In summary, in the future I wouldn’t let myself get in the same situation where you are continually putting yourself or your hard earned equipment/vehicle/trailer in a position to be abused. Chances are, said person will happily freeload and buggar off leaving you out of pocket and feeling very used! (End of bitter old bag rant)

The judge rinder case included similar. The man had damaged trimmings inside the camper van, and the gearbox has gone. Although the contract that they had said the borrower would pay for any damage and issues that the van had whilst in his care.

there was an expert witness (mechanic) that said it was unlikely that dodgy driving broke the gear box and therefore the borrower was not liable for the cost of repair. I’d think yours clutch would fall in the same category

 

[Crazy_cat_lady]

OH used to routinely let his parents drive his car on long distance journeys even though they had their own! It was his car getting the milage etc increased yet he could never figure out why I was shocked he allowed this! I dont even think they were named on the insurance but apparently as they were fully comp it was OK. He could never understand why I was shocked he allowed it!

My parents were named on mine but only so they could move it off the drive if needed or in a dire emergency they'd never use it just because.

 

[FourLeafClover]

The judge rinder case included similar. The man had damaged trimmings inside the camper van, and the gearbox has gone. Although the contract that they had said the borrower would pay for any damage and issues that the van had whilst in his care.

there was an expert witness (mechanic) that said it was unlikely that dodgy driving broke the gear box and therefore the borrower was not liable for the cost of repair. I’d think yours clutch would fall in the same category

I am a little confused. I didn’t say anything about a clutch... the car is an automatic ?

 

[MissTyc]

I am a little confused. I didn’t say anything about a clutch... the car is an automatic ?

I think the reply was meant for me & my burnt out clutch. Like I said, maybe it was the clutch's time, but the way she deal with it was upsetting as she essentially abandoned the broken down vehicle on the side of the road for hours before even telling me what had happened, let alone call my breakdown number or provide some moral support in organizing recovery ... As a friend, I would feel guilty (even if I knew it maybe wasn't fully my fault) and I would hang around to chat and snack while awaiting recovery (once the horses were safe of course!).

 

[pansymouse]

I never lend anything, my friends know this and don't ask. I'm not mean and will help anyone but I've seen too many friendships ruined because one party has taken advantage of another's possessions.