Liking the "theory" of competing... But "reality" is different?

[HotToTrot]

I appreciate the comments about being prepared, and as I have previously stated I know NOW where things have gone wrong, and how to prepare to avoid them. However I seem to be one of those people that if it can go wrong, it will go wrong, and this really, really stresses me out, especially on competition days. This is an example of one day that I think was possibly the worst I’ve had.

I planned on taking my horse to an XC clinic. Nice easy height jumps (approx. 2ft), well within our capabilities, and a straight easy drive to get to the venue (a god send when most of the venues I go to involve towing down horrid bendy roads). The times came through, I think it was approx. 2 or 3 pm (I’d taken the day off work), so thought this was great; time for a lay in, and pack my truck in the morning. (All of my show stuff baring mounting block, hat, BP, horse, saddle and bridle were always prepacked in a large plastic box so no need to worry where anything was.)

Went to yard evening before checked my trailer was ok for next day and noticed the number plate had vanished. Someone had borrowed trailer earlier on in the week (and this was a person I couldn’t say no to before anyone says anything!); rung them up, and apparently the number plate was still on it when trailer was returned to the yard. Slightly annoying, but plenty of time to get a new numberplate in the morning.

The morning arrives, and I needed a few bits of shopping, so nip into my local town. Get the shopping, then went to Halfords for a new plate. Queuing for about ten minutes only to be told by a very rude woman that I couldn’t get a number plate until 1pm, which was no use to me. The day just didn’t get any better. I went around about three or four more shops to get my number plate, and eventually got one, but this had delayed me by at least an hour, meaning my timings for the day were all completely out.

Got to yard, stuck number plate on with gaffa tape, fortunately horse was a good boy and loaded. The organiser of the clinic had given wrong directions of how to get into the venue, and the wrong directions of where to park. (I had doubled checked these with them, as I thought they were rather strange, but was assured that they were correct.) Ended up going down an access track, that you could only get through the gate if you had a code. I didn’t have the code. Fortunately there was someone who lived in the vicinity who let me through the gate; getting rather stressed by now! Followed directions to the parking, and ended up going down a farm track that was a dead end, and the wrong way. Ended up having to turn my truck and trailer around by reversing into a field entrance, which was no easy feat. More stress!

Finally got to where I was supposed to be parked, although I was late, I wasn’t too late, the others were just unloading and tacking up. Unloaded my horse (who was still being a good boy), and tacked him up. Got myself sorted and got my mounting block out. Put my foot on, and crunch, crack, my foot went right through it. I then also realised that I didn’t know what I had done with my car keys. Tried looking for them, and couldn’t find them. At that point I’d just had enough and was knelt on the ground next to my horse crying as I had just had enough of everything going wrong in one day.

Someone very nice came to help me out, and we got sorted in the end. Horse was very good when I was riding him that day; but it’s a day I never, ever wish to repeat (and yes it really all did happen before anyone accuses me of telling fairy stories), and the only possible thing that could have been avoided by planning was the number plate debacle by having a spare.


If anyone can beat this for a stressful day out I'd like to hear it!

I sympathise - I really do. This kinda s*** happens to me ALL THE TIME. I've had to unload horses in petrol stations to change flat tyres, get rescued because I've put the wrong fuel in the car, I'm always late, normally lost, have generally forgotten something vital, and am plagued by sicking babies and dirty nappies. Just keep going. Keep ploughing away.

 

[smja]

Take a deep breath.

I know what it's like when everything just mounts up. But, you need to put this behind you. It happened; you sorted it in the end; you had a good ride. Focus on the positive aspects, not the negative ones, or you're just setting yourself up to feel awful.

I used to call my dad after dressage when eventing. Why? So he could give me a (sometimes metaphorical) slap round the head, tell me that horrible DR is not the end of the world, and that I have a good horse who will jump whatever I ask him to, as long as I do it properly, so I'd best get on again to go and do SJ.
Now, I've reached the stage where I can do that myself.

Pick yourself up, tell yourself that you *can* and *will* do something. Make the best out of your day.

 

[TGM]

If you are expecting people to turn around and say 'poor you' I don't think they will. There are people out there who have SERIOUSLY bad days - thinking life changing/horse injuring etc etc.

You make your own luck I'm afraid.

Ditto this.

Wench, I can't believe you even asked the question whether people can beat your stressful day - surely you must realise that people have been seriously injured when competing or have returned without a horse at all or with a seriously broken one! Getting delayed, lost and mislaying the car keys is nothing by comparison. You need to start seeing that your glass is 'half full' and not 'half empty'.

 

[wench]

Oh crikey, now I am panicking that my preparation for the next event is a bit lacking!! Horse is very sensible and polite - loads and travels easily and is sensible enough for me to be able to manage everything on my own - which is what I have to do. Horse is also fit enough - I am pretty confident about that, I know where the event is, how to get to it and my start time, I even have a game plan, but....I have hardly had time to ride this week because my small children are on holiday and we have had another of our horses poorly, I still have a few minor tack alterations to make and to clean and pack my competition stuff. Sadly I am unlikely to have enough time to wash/clean the very hairy travel kit horse will need or do anything to make sure that I can look anything other than 'correct' (would love a bit more time to glamourise horse and I but that's just not going to happen!) To a certain extent I will be slightly winging it - I cannot plan for every eventuality or I will go bonkers/neglect the children/lose my job so I would hope that my experience and gut instincts will help 'fill in' where necessary.

I agree - you cannot plan for every eventuality. I learnt my lesson by allowing someone else to tack my horse up, and they got it wrong. Will I do it again, no? If I ever have the luxary of someone coming to a competition that can tack up, I will check it myself.

In regards to the incidences with my trailer, could I have planned for those? No not really in two instances. When the person parked in front of my trailer, they had a whole empty car park to park in, and they parked in front of my trailer. I couldnt have moved my trailer anywhere else, as thats where the YO wanted my trailer parking. A "No Parking" sign wouldnt have worked either - trust me on that one!

The second instance where someone had parked accross the bottom of my ramp was annoying in the fact it delayed me by about 15/20 minutes in setting off, which then, as my previous post, really stresses me out, and I find it increadibly difficult to stay calm. Horse was kept at a riding school at the time, it was a Saturday, so likelty to be a few people about. Got truck and trailer positioned in such a way that meant I could load up, but not be an obstruction to anyone else in the carpark, nor get in anyone's way should horse decide not to load. Brought the ramp down. Went and got my horse ready, lead him around to the car park, to find someone had wedged themselves behind my trailer, when there was loads of room elsewhere in the car park. So had to turn horse around, take him back into the stable, try and find the owner of the car to get it shifted, then take horse back round.

I dont think either of these instances could really be "planned" for, and you probably wont even think about them until it happens. So I'd suggest if either of the above are likely to happen to you on your event, put loads of traffic cones around your trailer/box so your not blocked in/out!

 

[burtie]

A wise horse person once advised me that any show/event you do with a horse, that you get to and get back again with all the same limbs you left with should be considered a perfect success. This was totally serious and a testament to how much work goes into just getting a horse to a competition fit and ready to compete, never mind actually getting round the whole event or getting a rosette! I like others have said prepare, prepare and prepare more. I go hoping to do well but if I return with me and the horse intact I consider it a success regardless of whatever else the day may throw at me.

 

[chestnut cob]

If anyone can beat this for a stressful day out I'd like to hear it!

Sorry but I don't think that is a particularly stressful day, just the result of being under prepared. Don't lend people your trailer. If it is your trailer, why didn't you already have a number plate for it already? Why wait until the day of your clinic to buy one? All of the stuff that happened could have been avoided if you'd a) got up earlier instead of having a lie in, and b) done basic things like getting your number plate on a different day. You got lost - that happens to everyone and if you leave enough time to get to a venue, plus about an extra half an hour to allow for getting lost or traffic, there's no reason to arrive in a flap. I know it's perfectly possible for roads to be closed or get stuck in motorway traffic, but you have to bear in mind that rural postcodes often land you about a mile away from where you need to be, so you always need to leave extra time to find the exact place. You wouldn't have lost your car keys if you hadn't been in a flap because you were late and lost....

When you are going to a competition or clinic, plan your day in advance. The last time I just winged it was to a local SJ comp and I had a rubbish day because I was late getting up, horse was a bit of a s*d to catch which I hadn't accounted for, took longer to get there, etc etc... you arrive in a flap then and have a rubbish day, and to top it off those are the days you usually find your class is finishing and you have to jump the bigger one!!

 

[palo1]

Well, its not a competition but...1 week before 'big' (for us) competition, horse seemed a bit off so week spent resting horse, consulting vet & worrying. Horse apparently fine 2 days before competition. Main towing vehicle then decided to have a sensor fail resulting in unpredictable cutting out, the day before comp. Vehicle 2, known to be old, but fairly reliable given a test run and pressed into service. Number plate for trailer now not appropriate but no time to change it. (lesson here is to always have a number plate for any vehicle you may tow with) Comp day dawns. Horse sound, loads fine, everything necessary on board. Plenty of time to get to venue which was 2 hours away. Encountered massive roadworks resulting in having to take trailer round tiny bendy lanes full of other traffic using this crap and frankly unsuitable diversion. One hour before venue, just as we hit motorway and now cutting it very fine timewise, vehicle engine warning light comes on. No way am I planning to stop on motorway with horse and trailer unless absolutely vital. Limp towards venue. Sat nav loses me. Now getting later and later and nearer my start time. I had allowed loads of time for travelling and for when we arrived. Anyway, finally arrive at venue to find a very long queue of traffic leading to poor towing vehicle getting hotter and hotter and less happy. Finally park. 10 mins till vetting and horse nowhere near ready. Sprint to secretary tent, pick up number, find I am confused about where horse and trailer now are. Slightly panicky now!! Horse vetted & tacked up somehow. Find the start & set off. At near the end of course horse goes lame. Now have broken vehicle, broken horse, miles from home and found actual course quite 'boring'!!

Somehow got horse and vehicle home very very slowly and feel I may have wasted a whole day of my life! Did I enjoy it? Nope. Could I have prevented any of it? Probably should have considered scratching our entry when horse and vehicle both appeared dodgy, but then success loves a trier!! Did I learn lessons about preparation? Loads. I just hope I never have another day like it, but these things happen and actually horse was fine after a few more days and we both got home in one piece. Sometimes you can avoid stuff happening, other times you just have to deal with it I guess. I am not saying that your day was not awful, but just to reassure you that most people have days like that too.

 

[wench]

I owed the person who borrowed my trailer a large favour, so I didnt have much of a choice.

As for the directions, thats why I said I doubled checked them to ensure that they were correct, as I didnt think the ones given to me were right. I was assured the directions given were correct, and they were wrong.

And no I'm not expecting "poor you"... it was merely to highlight that I appear to be one of those people that if it can go wrong, it will go wrong, no matter how much planning and preparation you put in...

 

[leflynn]

I owed the person who borrowed my trailer a large favour, so I didnt have much of a choice.

As for the directions, thats why I said I doubled checked them to ensure that they were correct, as I didnt think the ones given to me were right. I was assured the directions given were correct, and they were wrong.

And no I'm not expecting "poor you"... it was merely to highlight that I appear to be one of those people that if it can go wrong, it will go wrong, no matter how much planning and preparation you put in...

Try thinking positive and maybe less will go wrong for you? Sometimes if you expect it to go wrong it will.... (Sods law and all that jazz!)

 

[wench]

CC - the trailer did have MY number plate on it. I was lucky I checked the trailer the night before (at 8pm), so at least I knew I needed a new plate, but there was no way I would have been able to purchase one anywhere at that time at night.

My day was planned for "lay in", read 8am, spend 20 mins putting my stuff into the truck, into town and back by 10-1030, then down to the yard looking to set off for 12 - 1230, which was more than enough time for everything. As it was I was lucky that I had just about set off early enough to allow for the travel delays. The missing keys wouldnt have mattered any other time, but I was just that stressed out it was the icing on the cake.

 

[wench]

Try thinking positive and maybe less will go wrong for you? Sometimes if you expect it to go wrong it will.... (Sods law and all that jazz!)

I was really looking forward to the xc clinic I described - it was a lovely day, the timings were great, plenty of oppertunity to get there and get me and the horse sorted; I wasnt stressed at all before the event, and was thinking how much I was looking forwards to it!

But now in reflection, lets say I picture my new horse and I flying around a small XC course and coming over the finish line all happy and smiling. I'm not stupid enough that I think that I could do this tommrow, and it would end how I wanted, it wouldnt. I know what work I need to put in to make this achiveable; but then you think I really hope I never ever have to go through another day like that XC clinic ever again, do I actually want to take my horse anywhere!

 

[Moomin1]

I was really looking forward to the xc clinic I described - it was a lovely day, the timings were great, plenty of oppertunity to get there and get me and the horse sorted; I wasnt stressed at all before the event, and was thinking how much I was looking forwards to it!

We all have days like that.

 

[slumdog]

 

[nikkimariet]

do I actually want to take my horse anywhere!

Bruce the Unicorns sharer died yesterday. Enjoy it while you can.

 

[meardsall_millie]

Bruce the Unicorns sharer died yesterday. Enjoy it while you can.

How very sad, I'm sorry for your loss.

Puts it all into perspective doesn't it?

 

[burtie]

This ! ^^^^

 

[soulfull]

Like others have said what you describe, they are not extra bad days too most of us. Damaged horse/friend/us are really bad days

Maybe you need to manage your stress levels?

First show with my new horse was also a new venue to me. I got postcode. Did as route planner and took sat nav

Set off well in advance. Got to where post code was and realise I had gone to the postal address. A tiny tiny cottage down an even smaller lane. Lorry was fairly new to me too. ditches and cottages right next to road. Had to reverse for ages. Then really struggle to turn it around

Got new postcode. Which was another hour in opposite direction

Off I set as thought would still have time

Got to where sat nav said it was. Nope!! Not there. No one to ask even though I went up and down the road. No answer from AnY of the numbers on the website.

Gave up and came home

ALL MY OWN FAULT. I should have checked, driven the route in car the week before if need be Gutted, annoyed. YES. Wo is me No!

 

[wench]

Gosh what a nightmare. Were you ever in the vicinity of the show.

I always like to have a drive to the event centre beforehand in car to know where I'm going. (The example I gave above, hard to describe, but basically I was on the right farm, I'd just been sent down the wrong farm track. I couldn't have driven in too start with to check it was right as all private land )

 

[HuggyBear]

Hey OP,

I think a lot of it is to do with perspective. I will be honest and say that what you described to me wasn't that bad, but then I am not you and everybody deals with everything differently. We all might receive the exact same issue, it is just how we deal with it that will be different.

Someone once said it often takes you experiencing true loss for you to understand what 'bad' actually is- Perhaps take a breather, look at where you are and where you want to be and try and put it into perspective.

I am grade A stress head. I plan to the Nth degree to alleviate my stress levels. I would rather leave super early than risk any chance of being late, etc. However, when things go wrong, just take a breath. What is stressing and crying going to help you with? Nothing at all, it will just make you feel even worse.

Laugh at yourself- Have you died, is someone or your horse dying? No. Then there is no reason to cry. So you miss a training class because you are trying to find your car keys- laugh. You'll have a fun story to tell at the pub.

I love Hottotrot's accounts, because half of the fun is reading about her roller coaster experience. It happens to everyone, it is just working out how you can best deal with it afterwards.

I really hope you can go back to enjoying your horse and do get that one great day out competing. Be careful that you don't miss realising you had a great day because you were too caught up looking for what was the bad.

Most importantly, put the effort in but don't take yourself too seriously.

 

[soulfull]

Gosh what a nightmare. Were you ever in the vicinity of the show.

I always like to have a drive to the event centre beforehand in car to know where I'm going. (The example I gave above, hard to describe, but basically I was on the right farm, I'd just been sent down the wrong farm track. I couldn't have driven in too start with to check it was right as all private land )

yep it was part of a statelu home, sat nav and aa sent me to one gate but it was closed, no one around anywhere, I drove further 3-4 miles nothing, no sign of the place

turns out if I had carried on round one more bend there was a sign lol and 2 mins away

 

[JFTDWS]

If you really want to play "rubbish day out" top trumps:

Last time I took Fergus out, it resulted in a nigh on £600 vet bill, including emergency call out and a full set of x-rays on one leg. I had to abandon Fergus at a yard 50 miles away for the better part of a week, which I spent mostly worrying that I was going to have to have my beautiful, fabulous horse shot. Not to mention the diesel I spent going up there, the full livery bill for his stay, the re-arranged work that week or anything else.

I may have cried into his neck a bit, but I'm pretty sure I didn't collapse onto my knees in self-pity at any point :rolleyes3: And even that is nothing - it's a piddling inconvenience, because at the end of the day I got to take my horse home alive (and ultimately sound).

You just have to learn to deal with the little things, the inconveniences, because they're a part of life and you can't wail and weep about them forever.

 

[MagicMelon]

If you read my post it says that no matter which horse I've had, or where I have been something will go wrong...

Then perhaps have less expectation - rather than hoping the entire day goes great just focus on one thing like, you'll be happy if the particular horse behaves in the warm up etc.

I think most days are "acceptable" as long as I haven't fallen off or got eliminated

 

[TPO]

Realised I forgot to quote on this! Riding every day always seems so appealing when you can't do it... (as I am now!) however earlier on this year, as per my original post, the facilities were not quite what my horse and I needed, it was a huge drag, and I really, really didnt want to get on, as I knew I wasnt going to get anything out of the session.

Years ago with tantrum horse I was forcing myself to ride most evenings to get him ready for competitions. He was generally good to ride at home and didnt have many tantrums, but I was exhausted from work, and wasnt enjoying it that much...

...which interestinly leads me on to the next point. In one of my previously stressful jobs, I'd have entered tantrum horse into a competition... spend all week at work dreaming about it, and how much I was looking forwards to taking tantrum horse out and riding him (he was a special horse to me!), but then Saturday morning would come, and rather than being "buzzing" about going to the competition, I was worn out from work, and all I wanted to do was stay in bed.

I did write out a big reply but what's the point. "Woe is me" isn't really my bag. Yes we all have down times and hard times, when nothing goes right and it's soul destroying but there's something that keeps you hanging in there.

Since you've quoted me the most I've had at a time is 3. I worked full time, DIY/rented field, stables and no facilities and done them all am and pm through all the highs and lows including ultimately losing 3 of my mares one after another each year from 2007-2009. In between I took on 2 neglected horses that cost a fortunate and was knackering with one trying to kill himself (just missed an artery) and had serous issues that took a year of training to resolve. I was the only person that could safely handle him so I had no "time off".

It was heartbreaking and soul destroying and It's not much fun right now doing what I do for my gelding. As well as the stress and worry of something being wrong I've been through the ringer with untruthful vets and pretty much outright lies. But you suck it up and keep on keeping on...

So your story doesn't overwhelm me with sympathy. I'm not saying that you have to ride or compete, it is meant to be enjoyable and more than that I think horses is something that is in you (or not) whether you compete or simply enjoy just being. I wish my worries were that I didn't have a good day out with my sound horse because I failed to prepare.

The "problems" you've used to illustrate points are pretty much all self inflicted and relatively easily remedied. Yes they are a big deal at the time but you pick yourself up, dust yourself, suck it up and get on with it. I don't really know what you want to get from this thread? I opened it thinking it was going to be a discussion about theory vs reality but sadly it wasn't.

I haven't seen one example of your given issues that aren't pretty straightforward to resolve?

NMT & PS; so sorry for your loss. Thoughts are with you and your sharer'a family

 

[el_Snowflakes]

When you go to events & see well behaved horses & talented riders it because they have worked very hard rain or shine to achieve it. Having said that, everyone has their good and bad days......you just need to focus on the good. Normally I have a stress free journey, & horse jumps everything when we compete at RC level. The most we normally ever get is 4 faults however last time she was a ****** to load...& I came off when she stopped at our last fence! You just have to put t down to experience. That's the good thing about being a member of the RC, you see the same bunch of competitors so you see that everyone has their good and bad days. Chin up & give yourself (& your horse) a boot up the backside!!

 

[Caol Ila]

I quit competing more than ten years ago due to it being more stress than fun. Nothing really terrible ever happened -- we just couldn't get the scores or make the progress through the levels that I wanted. Perhaps a more talented rider on my horse could have done, but that wasn't me. Had I decided to devote my life to dressage, ride more horses, get lessons three times per week, buy the talented dressage schoolmaster, do more stints as a working student, that might have changed. But I knew that for various reasons, none of those things were going to happen. I mean, I rode the horse (and still ride her) 4-6 times per week, but improving our dressage in any significant way would have taken some serious training.

I spent about a year being really unhappy and down about it all, then I had an epiphany where I decided I had to accept my horse and myself as we were and cease and desist going to competitions. Best decision I ever made.

 

[el_Snowflakes]

Again, think this pretty much sums it up. Funny how the harder you work the luckier you become !

haha I can relate to this......Ive seen me going around like a zombie after sitting up every night til 2am watching youtube videos of charlotte dujardin & valegro training!

 

[SaffronWelshDragon]

If you really want to play "rubbish day out" top trumps:

Last time I took Fergus out, it resulted in a nigh on £600 vet bill, including emergency call out and a full set of x-rays on one leg. I had to abandon Fergus at a yard 50 miles away for the better part of a week, which I spent mostly worrying that I was going to have to have my beautiful, fabulous horse shot. Not to mention the diesel I spent going up there, the full livery bill for his stay, the re-arranged work that week or anything else.

I think this trumps mine. October 2012, hour and a bit hack to a hunter trial. Bitterly cold north wind, my inexperience meant i didn't bring a rug (moron) and was poorly run so had a huge wait for my go. Just about to go in, Saf was a little odd but couldn't put my finger on it. Suddenly laid down whilst i was mounted, i was terrified, i thought it was her heart. So many helpful people sorted me out, got her saddle off and fetched rugs. New friends suspected colic. Vet was an agonising hour away but bless Saf she was so calm despite the pain. Lovely friends from my RC lent me their lorry to get her home. Sometimes bad things happen, makes you appreciate the wonderful people out there.

 

[JFTDWS]

Sometimes bad things happen, makes you appreciate the wonderful people out there.

So very true.

YM and groom on F's holiday yard were amazing - looked after him so well and were absolutely great about the whole thing. Dafthoss and Jesstickle - the former held the horse for vet and came up on x-ray days, JT offered to bring him home with me; both kept me sane while it all went tits up. And on a less practical level, everybody I know from here on fb who were all rooting for pus (Dianchi's pus song!)...

You really have to focus on the positives!

 

[nikicb]

I'm not saying you dont have to practise before you go to competitions. Previously when I was going out to competitions I was a lot less knowledgable than I am now, although arguably my riding was possibly better as I had been doing it more. But horse asides, no matter how much I seemed to plan the day, SOMETHING would go wrong (and yes all of these have happened):

>Someone parked in front of my trailer then gone out for the day so I was very later and missed half of what I was supposed to be doing
>Hitched trailer up to my truck, drop the ramp down ready for horse, some idiot goes and parks right at the bottom of my ramp so I cant get my horse in.
>Someone had helped themselves to my trailer and left it full of *****, leaving me to clean it up before I went to the show
>Friend/helper (who knew what they were doing with horses) tacking my horse up entirely wrong at a competition and horse wasnt best impressed and left me eating dirt
>Same friend read insisted that they were calling out my dressage test, and missed half of it out. Horse was going really well and still ended up with a rubbish score.
>Mother deciding that just as I'm about to leave home she's got a load of jobs for me to do before I go. Making me massively late.
>Needed to test the brakes on my trailer; it needed hitching up to my truck and seeing if it was ok. My dad was using the truck the weekend before the competition, so asked him to drop by the yard with the truck (it wasnt that much out of the way), and see what happened. He wouldnt. Came to hitching the trailer up next weekend, the brakes were stuck on. No competition for me.

My points with the above is, and along with original post, is that nothing ever seems to go right, no matter how much planning and preparation I do; either the horse behaves and everything else goes wrong, or the horse misbehaves and everything else goes right.

I do find towing horse and then riding quite stressful - its much easier when you tow the horse there then hand it over to someone else to ride!

I'm sorry, but virtually every single one of these things that have gone wrong are being blamed on someone else. Some may be issues that you had no control over, but tack your own horse up, learn your test and then you won't need to rely on someone else. I have competed for years on my own. My old mare couldn't even be tied up by the box for a minute so I had to work around that. Now I enjoy going out on my own as it is time for me to spend with my horse away from children/oh etc. Not that they are bad, but it's nice to get 'me' time. Personally I love competing, it is the culmination of many weeks/months work and mental/physical effort. I'm probably not a good example though. I tend to have a better handle on my horse's training plan than my children's homework. Oh well, they'll sort it out eventually.

 

[BBP]

Op, I'm a bit like you, I find the travelling etc pretty stressful and I suffer from horrible nerves. These generally kick in the moment I lead him towards the lorry and he decides to morph from chilled out to fly bucking his way across the road. Instantly my mind fixes on all the things that could go wrong. So I took all the pressure off, I know I'm not ready to compete yet, it's not his fault he gets a bit mental at events, he's barely been any where so why should I expect laid back? So this spring I am dedicated to taking him somewhere every weekend, other yards for lessons, hacks from other locations, XC schooling and one eventer trial where I warmed up by going for a hack as I knew I'd get nervous if he leapt around in the collecting ring. And guess what, my hot buzzy little pony is being just awesome. Yes he has a wee bounce around sometimes, I'm still learning what type of warm up suits him. And yes we got eliminated in both phases at the eventer trial but it was because I hadn't done the prep work, I used it as experience, carried on quietly and came home with a huge grin because of the things that went well.

My horse is a joy to ride at home and I'd love to show the world what he is capable of, but it's more important to me that we have fun, learn something each time out and make the most of every minute together. Bottom line for me is I love riding him so much i could happily never compete, just play, competition is a choice, it's not forced on me. Horse and human life is fragile and I'd hate to waste a second of it feeling dissatisfied (and I suffer severe depression at times so I know how tough it can be to see the positives).