Losing your temper.

henryhorn

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Devon UK
www.narramorehorses.blogspot.com
I thought I was past it but sadly I'm not.
Last night it was around 9pm and I went out to catch Charlie the mini shetland who stays in overnight to keep the stallion company.
Normally he comes at a trot as his paddock is only 1/2 acre.
Not last night. he shot off the speed of light bucking and squealing (aged at least 36 by the way) and I waited patiently walking after him with a carrot.
Twenty mins later I was still walking whilst he now slowed to a canter worked his way round and round the paddock.
Forty mins later I was shaking a bucket and he was still tazzing merrily round, by now the horses in the adjoining fields had joined in and were galloping round too.
An hour later I resorted to throwing the bucket right at him, got him on the bum and stormed off really cross.
I tied two lunge lines together and laid them on the grass with one end looped over a fence post.
It took just ten mins of driving him into the corner I'd made then walked in and grabbed him.
I'm afraid I was so bloody furious I smacked him twice really hard.
Of course that won't help, next time he will remember the wallops and be even worse, but I was past reasoning as it was dark, I had normal shoes on so was nettled and fed up.
What this post is really about is when you lose your temper, what do you hope to achieve?
Last night I probably felt better but he certainly wouldn't have, but in my rage I felt he knew damn well the game he was playing and so deserved the end result.
Today I think what a prat I was!
I've heard a few times lately of riders who batter their horses when they won't do what they want, and thought how stupid they were, as the only way to get a horse to really work is to persuade it to work with you, yet of course in my time, I've used my whip as well.
I know of several top riders who it took years to learn not to be so agressive when riding, so at what point does a rider realise that beating a horse up won't work?
I'm not anti-whip, just anti carrying on to relieve your own frustration.
Charlie will be cross with me for a few days I reckon, and next time common sense will kick in earlier and I will use the lunge lines trick the minute he starts being difficult.
On the good side the little sod is sound as a pound and full of energy.
And all that marching aboput last night for over an hour and a half in total must have done me some good, I was up early this morning and did 25 lengths of the pool then a load of exercises afterwards...
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I don't think I've ever lost my temper with my horse, but we have had little stand offs with each other. I have smacked her with the whip, when she napped, but it was controlled, and I knew because she didn't like the whip she would go forwards. She was just testing me, and I wasn't going to have it. She was not actually scared of anything, otherwise I would've coaxed her forwards and worked with her.

However, someone I know really, really lost their temper with their large hunter. He's a whip, and the horse, all 18hh of it, reared up, so he walloped him as hard as he could with the whip. He was so furious and shocked that he had gone up, that he just lost it. I don't think he was thinking to achieve anything, but it did - the horse never did it again. The horse was also a large, stupid, unsensitive horse, who did not come off worse for wear in the slightest, so I do think that contributed to the guy whacking it in the way he did.
 
It happens sometimes, we all loose our temper sometimes, and sometimes it achieves the end result. Plus I have to say that if the pony has got to 36 it isn't going to cause too much problem, my guess is that he has pushed people to this before! Human nature and equine nature both being what they are (at times) there is going to be a clash of ego's that goes to the wire. Having had two of the most self-opinionated Appy mares (and a fairly short temper myself) I have had to get a grip more than once! The only time it worked in my favour was with the old appy she had napped for the entire schooling session, ending up VERY near the river bank I lost it and circled her so much that we nearly went in, her self-preservation kicked in before mine did and the napping was never as bad again. However I was younger, more foolish and less in control of my temper than I am now and I hope that I manage better than that (plus the new mare is no where near as bolshie as the original )
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I am prone to chucking buckets and ponies that gallop off into the distance
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and I have kicked my sisters dog a couple of times
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not hard...but still
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We're all human and at some point or another our horses push us a bit too far and to a degree I think it's necessary that they know that they've crossed a line. Last time I lost my temper with my pony (who is stubborn, and so am I) I was trying to put his travel boots on and he wouldn't stand still and kept picking up his legs. He got a dig in the ribs and I shouted at him, he knew I wasn't messing about and he stood dead still, sulking, and let me put his boots on. I did feel guilty about it though...but it did the trick!
 
As said before, we are all human with various points at which we break.

I have lost my temper with Tyler a few times but ended up walking away and kicking a bucket (unfortunately one one of these occasions a 5kg salt lick happened to be in it and cracked my toe - to which Tyler looked highly amused at!!)

They do test our patience sometimes and we do lose our temper. Think one of the biggest hurdles is realising that we are heading in that direction and stopping before we direct it at the cheeky monkey who is causing it!!
 
My chestnut mare was really treated rough. all because shes a TB who was bought for a complete Novice. She was too much for him; so, his OH took it out on Candi. It took 2 Years before i could raise my Hand to her head; I saw her old owner at a show once, and Candi was being just "norty", ie Refusing to stand still ; Her old owner came over and said to me, "GIVE HER A GOOD BOOT IN THE STOMACHE, THAT SOON STOPS HER"

I can understand(in some ways) about Henryhorn and the shetland. Two wallops at 36; The pony should know better at that age.
 
Sadly I have lost my temper in my old boy's younger days, when his sole purpose in life was to jog and rush everywhere, and one day on a very long 3 to 4 hour or so hack, I had had enough (this was over 10 years ago
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) ... and I smacked him with the crop and broke it
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. I threw it away and have never taken a crop with me, with him since, as I was so upset and angy with myself
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.

He can now never do any wrong in my eyes and I sometimes hanker over having that young boy back with me again ... he is now very good and cannot put a foot wrong
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We have all been there. In a perfect world etc. but it isn't. I don'tthink you were cruel and I bet he is a tough little character who has forgotten all about it now.
 
To be honest I wouldn't underestimate Charlie's smarts. I know horses tend to be a bit dumb, ponies on the other hand are generally pretty sharp when it comes to brains, and my betting is the little sod knows exactly why he was bopped with a bucket!

On the contrary I would imagine that he will be fine to bring in tonight - would be interested to hear how easy/difficult it is to catch him tonight.
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I'm pretty even tempered with my horses, but to be frank, they really are pretty good in all aspects. I did lob a rubber bucket at a boarding horse when, for no reason except I was taking the buckets out of the field, he decided to zip backwards at breakneck speed in my direction - I won't have that, so threw the bucket at him, bopped him on his bum, he whizzed forward in fright - served him right, bad mannered git that he was.
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He never did it to me again so I guess he learned his lesson.
 
Losing your temper is just part of being human
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And a couple of smacks is nothing to them, when you consider the damage they do to each other
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I have lost my temper with horses in the past, and thrown buckets at many
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Although I have never punished with a whip, I have certainly smacked a few naughty yearling colts!
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Generally they just look at me as if to say 'what the hell was that?' then continue what they were doing
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I think we get mad when we lose control of the situation and hitting the horse releaves the anger and punishes the horse. Have you noticed you stop feeling angry once you have hit him?

I did have shocking temper when I was younger, and I have mellowed now. However I was have a rough time and it didn't take much to make mad.
 
Have to admit to not reading all the replies. To be honest, don't beat yourself up about it, I actually used to whack my kids and they still come come regularly (once a week, at 23 and 21) and I damn well still chuck the odd bucket at an unrurly horse! Horses are not stupid, and they know when they are out of order. Just because they are horses doesn't mean they can ignore the rules! xx
 
Okay........... I have read everything .... will just say one thing, if this had been posted by someone else they probably would have got jumped on
 
Oh the memories of not being able to catch my horse.
Bertie was the same, twas his only vice!
The lunge lines or in his case electric tape (which wasnt on) was used to round him into a corner.
The times mum would drop me off at the stables and return 3 hours later asking if i had a nice ride to be told... ive not caught him yet
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I too lost my temper, probably more so when i was a frustrated teenager.
Now foresure, I occasionally lose it I did this week with Snoopy who was being a nappy twit.
I felt dreadful afterwards
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I should make it clear, I'm not beating myself up about it at all today, more thinking how stupid I was for not getting the lunge stuff earlier.
our old stallion had to be made to respect you or he would walk stright over you when you opened the door, but I'm talking about losing your temper in anger not teaching a horse to back off.
I just wish I'd used my brain earlie I think..
 
[ QUOTE ]
I should make it clear, I'm not beating myself up about it at all today, more thinking how stupid I was for not getting the lunge stuff earlier.
our old stallion had to be made to respect you or he would walk stright over you when you opened the door, but I'm talking about losing your temper in anger not teaching a horse to back off.
I just wish I'd used my brain earlie I think..

[/ QUOTE ]

Have you considered Parelli?
S
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Would depend on who exactly posted, in some cases possibly.

Anyhow, I think that everybody (regardless of anyone who claims they have never done it) has lost their temper with their horse at least once. I know I have felt like beating the life out of one or two on odd occasions, but have held my temper in check and put the animal out of my reach. I have undoubtedly smacked one occasionally though.
Don't worry about it, your little smartass will forget about it pretty quickly.
 
Ah well, there will always be another day! It's not like you make a habit of it and i'm sure he'll soon forgive you.
Last time I lost my temper was poulticing a foot, and my horse dumping all his weight on me, refusing to stand still and just generally taking the p**s. Plus I had an audience, so i lost it, adn threw the role of tape at him! Needless to say he didn't want to stand still the next time the roll of tape was around.
Plus one night riding my horse was so naughty I actually burst into tears in frustration!
 
Hindsight is a wonderful thing isn't it?!
We all lose our temper sometimes & it's only natural that you'll feel like a complete prat today but the pony won't be any worse for wear! We have the same thing with our Shetland - she especially likes to make catching difficult in the rain!!!!!
I lost it the other day with Bailey & was so mad with myself - usually I would have just stood for a second & had a little word with myself but the bl00dy animal just would not stop pulling me forwards & snatching at the reins so in my temper I thought 'well if you're going to pull me I'll pull you back'. I felt absolutely dreadful afterwards.
One of my Nieces ponies once bit me on the top of the head as I was squatting down trying to find a rogue screw - he's very funny with his food & obviously took exception to me being within 2 mtrs of his bucket! I kicked that bucket at him but he never bit me again & is no more volatile than he was before (he's a grumpy git at the best of times)! I didn't feel so bad about that as the mardy little sod deserved it for biting!!!!!!!
 
I've burst into tears of frustration a few times on a horse, but I've never lost my self control or taken it out on a horse. On the rare occasions when I have given out a big walloping, mainly for kickers and nappers, I can pretty much say it was well-deserved and not done in temper, though I was angry at the time.

Oh the joys of horses!
 
Sometimes it works really well...OH had been asked to bring the horses in and when trying to get the TB in the stable, the horse went straight out as soon as his headcollar was off (the stable door was not properly bolted) and started heading back to his filed a couple of acres away. OH just stood in the middle of the yard, lost the plot, and bellowed "Get in your b***dy stable b***dy horse" At which point the horse did an about turn and trotted straight back into the stable.
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I have a really short temper and often have to stop myself to calm down when the horse - who has figured out how to frustrate me - is being a spoon.

I think the most important thing about dealing with horses is knowing when to be strong and aggressive and when to keep calm and patient. If a horse is being dangerous then sometimes you have to be firm with them and that might been aggression. And obviously when the horse is just worked up and upset if you don't stay calm the horse isn't. (Am really just stating the obvious here but it is interesting!)

On that note, at a local riding club show today I saw two really different examples of this sort of thing. In the jumping ring - just small 2'0/2'3 jumps, there was first a young girl (old enough to know wrong) on a gorgeous pony who looks like it was trying for her. She came into the ring and bounced about and sent it ambling towards the first fence, and I think she got to the first filler when in put in a gentle 'ahh what's this?' and she didn't push it on so it stopped. So she yanked it round one-handedly, smacked it with a whip whilst pony-club-kicking and gave it one stride into the fence. It couldn't physically jump it from where she put it. When it finally got over it she basically smacked it round the rest, bad angles, bad strides and it couldn't jump some of the fences. She then took out out of the ring, smacked it and galloped off across the show ground. Was shocked completely! Most kids actually have some respect for their ponies... just wanted to take it off her and take it home with me - it was really quite a sweet pony.

The other one was a girl on a cob - the cob was really unsettled and nervous and looked really strong, and she just took it round really steadily and calmly. She stopped it if it got too forward and got it steady and collected again before continuing. It's good riding like that really impressed me - I get too worked up to be able to ride like that.

In terms of a pony though, I have spent hours in a field trying to get my devious moo in whilst she trots in circles around me - just out of reach. Used to end in me just throwing the carrot at her. They honestly don't care, but I think they do enjoy the fun of the game sometimes! Ponies are annoying little creatures! It would be interesting to see if he is in a mood with you or is easier to catch next time.

It would be interesting to get into the mind of a horse/pony...

(Ranting due to boredom and procrastinating about revision...heh)
 
Everyone loses their temper at some point with a horse! we're only human after all!
However I think horses are great at making (most of) us aware of the results of our actions. They just react, they cant rationalise so we get a purely emotional response back. Good for teaching us patience and perseverance
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My TB mare has been very good at that, shes taught me that its not always about how I feel and to think of how others feel. Theres always a reason why she reacts the ways she does. Shes such a lovely girl.
 
Hi,

I have read through all the posts - an interesting subject. I must also firstly confess to being pretty new to horse ownership.

However a couple of questions spring to (inexperienced!) mind :

Why does no-one ask why the pony does not want to be caught ?

Surely the more agression aimed at a horse or pony in this situation will make it fearful in future of a similar situation ?

I would be interested in everyone's thoughts.
 
Also thinking about it, horses never lose their temper with each other but will give a well aimed kick if another horse crosses the line. Sometimes I do think these natural horsemanship techniques go a bit far. Theres nothing wrong with giving the horse a non-emotional slap when it crosses the line as its herd leader would if it was in the field.
 
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