Mid-life crisis!

[Brockles77]

Hi everyone. So - big topic BUT. I work in the city and have a job I like, but have fallen out of love with - it also requires a lot of social commitment and I am less and less willing to do this as I now have a horse I love spending my time with.
I ride 5 times a week and keep my horse on full livery outside the city. The yard is okay (sometimes great, sometimes GRRR) - but here's the thing. I'd like to work with horses.
I'm willing to take the pay cut, to retrain, and to move eventually but of course for now I need my salary (and my house is in the city too - with mortgage to boot!).

Anyone else done this? I guess my most transferrable skills are project managing, therefore I could run a yard/riding school - more feasible than maybe retraining in something therapeutic. I could retrain as an instructor too (For the record I am an okay rider but Piggy doesn't need to worry!). I compete unaffiliated eventing 80cm but my yard know me from being a nervous returner to riding and therefore sometimes still treat me like that. I do Quest (Novice level) and a few other things, but I only ride my horse, so not exactly getting a lot of experience. I have a 17hh chestnut idiot who I love.

Anyway, advice? Thoughts?

 

[Flowerofthefen]

Don't do it!! Keep horses as a hobby!!

 

[bouncing_ball]

Find a job that is fairly flexible outside London. Dont work with horses.

 

[lme]

I would echo the above. You can do a project management type job in much cheaper parts of the country.

 

[stangs]

One wonders about the future of this industry, if all prospective newcomers get told is to not work in it.

Regardless, in your case OP you need decide a) whether you're financially able to retrain and work with horses, b) whether you genuinely want to work with horses, or whether you just think you do because of time spent at your current position, and c) what exactly it is that interests you about working with horses. You may not like spending time with others' horses as much as you like spending time with your own, especially when you're spending long hours with them and not your own horse.

@teapot's a good person to advise as regards the feasibility running a yard.

 

[oldie48]

I'd also say don't do it. If I had a horse on a yard I would want to be confident that the yard manager had more experience than I had, or at least as much and if I use a trainer I expect them to have competed fairly competitively or had experience of having ridden lots of different horses. I don't know what age you are but Mid life crisis would suggest that you're not in your teens or twenties, so tbh i think you have left it too late. And it is so difficult to make a decent living. Keep it as a hobby. Sorry if this seems harsh but it's an honest answer.

 

[Jellymoon]

Could you take a sabbatical from your job and get some work experience with horses? Maybe over winter to test if it’s really what you want to do as it really is such a different kettle of fish at that time of year.
I worked in London for a fair while when I was younger, but it wasn’t for me as I love the countryside and horses. I moved out to live in a village, got a job in nearby town in the same industry, bought a horse, got married, had kids, and made a life for myself with horses. I have often thought about various horsey jobs I can do when
my job annoys me, but I know it’s not really for me, I like them as a hobby.
My job is now part time since I had kids, which is a nice balance.

 

[McGrools]

Hiya, i kind of did this, left a finance job to work with horses at age 45. Very fortunate in that the OH is breadwinner and we have land for my own horses.
i taught in a riding school and do freelance yard work. It is very hard work physically and leaves you with not a lot of energy nor money. It is a hard hard industry to work in.
having said that i would never go back to an office job.
i would not advise unless you are financially secure and can treat is more as a top up rather than expecting to earn a decent living from it xx

 

[teapot]

Thanks @stangs OP I can and have seen it from both sides - those wanting a career change, and employing those wanting a career change.

If you're serious, you'll need to bash through your entire complete Stage 1 to 3, and in all reality your Stage 4 on the lunge/care/business management side to even get a look in at decent yard/centre manager roles in my experience. If you do the coaching exams too then bonus as you're dual role on a staff team. You'd also need to look at getting decent yard experience. Livery yards can be a world away from commerical centres.

The likes of Talland, Ingestre and Wellington could get you through that lot in three months, assuming your knowledge and riding is reasonable, if you were prepared to give up everything to do it, immerse yourself in yard life, and have the spare cash to pay for the training (Wellington being the most expensive of the three) and your exam fees. The teaching side would take a little longer unless you've got coaching experience/a natural aptitude for it. It also takes a while to build up coaching experience if you were wanting to go freelance/build a client base up. There are plenty of jobs around at the 'junior' staff level currently, but the industry isn't the most forward thinking, and I know how an old boss of mine would react to someone older rocking up for an yard based job interview (rightly or wrongly legally).

The reality though is it IS a young(er) person's game. Long hours, hard work, being bossed around by over confident early 20s people, riding new school horses and hitting the deck, doing things a yard way's, not your own, getting cold and wet, badly paid, and with little time for your own horse. Also no one is going to employ you as a yard manager without solid experience behind you. I remember having an older apprentice (mid 30s) who like you wanted a complete change. The physicality of the job, the hours, and the younger sense of humour in the staff room made her rush back to her previous career, having realised the grass wasn't greener.

I was lucky, I went the admin route and ended up in ops management, only getting wet if we were short staffed or offered a hand, and basically having a whale of a time, for the most part! I did all my training off my own back at my own expense mind you. I still wouldn't have the experience to be a sole yard manager though! I recently left the industry for a better career path, salary options and a pension... and I enjoy my lessons a heck of a lot more now too

 

[st_marks]

Could you maybe take a middle step and find a project management job at a horsey company? Best of both worlds in a way.

I have a full-time normal job but I've started producing horses for sale, and am now being asked to help with other peoples' too, which I am strongly resisting doing. I don't overly enjoy working with other people's horses unless they are exceptionally lovely (and they usually aren't!) and if I have a spare hour, it's smarter of me to use it to put in more effort at the day job or into my sale horses than exercising a random horse for pocket change.

I'd also note that even going 'pro' in this small way has changed how I view horses and the sport in a way I'm not always sure I like and, frankly, didn't expect. I'm more businesslike and maybe a bit more clinical/cold about the whole thing, my partner commented the other day that I seem much less emotionally attached to the horses than I used to be. I used to never understand how some pros seemed standoffish about horses in their care but I see how it happens now - it's a survival strategy. If you fall madly in love, it's just too heartbreaking when they leave. My only priorities used to be doing right by the horses and enjoying myself. If I made a bit of progress over the year that was a bonus. Now it's more like do right by the horses, don't let the accounting go upside down, keep horses making forward progress in training, keep co-owner of horses happy with investment, and enjoying myself comes last. It is still very rewarding - more rewarding, maybe - but there's less fun and relaxation.

Another person I know who has followed a similar path to me but on a bigger scale is having a bit of a rocky go of it and is asking me for advice, and I don't know how to say the problem isn't lack of skill but lack of practicality and business sense. You can't be so attached to the sale horses that you never sell them, or so dedicated to helping out horses & owners that you don't properly charge for your time and expertise re: running the yard, training horses, giving lessons. Basically I turned my hobby into a job and now sometimes feel like I don't have a hobby, only a job. My acquaintance tried to turn their hobby into a job, still has the hobby, but doesn't have a job. Be sure you are okay financially & emotionally with either of these options.

 

[Trouper]

Forget who said "when you marry your mistress you create a vacancy" but I think the same applies to turning your hobby into work. What would you do for relaxation and down-time?

Having said that, I agree with @st_marks that you could maybe use your organisational skills in a horse-related company in some way.

 

[Shilasdair]

Don't do it.
Not only is the equine industry hard work, long hours, and low pay, but there is also (weirdly) a lot of competition for any paid roles/vacancies.
You don't sound as if you have qualifications, nor experience.
And as Teapot says above, it's physically tough working on yards, even for very young, very fit people.
Project management is no help at all to running a yard, incidentally.

 

[Brockles77]

Hi all. These are remarkably useful and generous responses. Thank you.
I’ll have a think and process.
I think the idea of boshing through the Stages is a good plan as I can do that whilst still at work I think.
lots to think about and thank you so much for taking the time to respond at length (and so, ahem, honestly!). Very useful.
right. Better get to work ??

 

[Brockles77]

Could you take a sabbatical from your job and get some work experience with horses? Maybe over winter to test if it’s really what you want to do as it really is such a different kettle of fish at that time of year.
I worked in London for a fair while when I was younger, but it wasn’t for me as I love the countryside and horses. I moved out to live in a village, got a job in nearby town in the same industry, bought a horse, got married, had kids, and made a life for myself with horses. I have often thought about various horsey jobs I can do when
my job annoys me, but I know it’s not really for me, I like them as a hobby.
My job is now part time since I had kids, which is a nice balance.

Which fair, Jellymoon?!

 

[southerncomfort]

Don't do it.
Not only is the equine industry hard work, long hours, and low pay, but there is also (weirdly) a lot of competition for any paid roles/vacancies.
You don't sound as if you have qualifications, nor experience.
And as Teapot says above, it's physically tough working on yards, even for very young, very fit people.
Project management is no help at all to running a yard, incidentally.

Agree with this.

I managed 3 years working on a yard before I was completely physically broken, and I'm still in constant pain now. That was in my thirties. Their is no way at all I would manage 3 years in the industry in my forties.

 

[Shilasdair]

Which fair, Jellymoon?!

I think she meant 'fair while' as in 'quite a long time'.
I don't think she actually worked for a fair....

 

[Ahrena]

I would say don’t do it.
I worked with horses for a good 7 years and loved the flexibility (freelance) but eventually gave it up as I was sick of having no money and I stopped enjoying my horses - after riding 5 and mucking out 10, I didn’t really fancy riding mine!

I chose a career in the emergency services so total opposite in relation to free time and I do get pangs for my old life especially when things are going well horse-wise as I miss the freedom and flexibility, but I will never ever go back and instead trying to secure a role within my organisation that is a bit more civilised office hours.

 

[tristar]

whatever you decide sounds like you have a great attitude, positive

think long and hard, look for a niche, follow your heart

most yard jobs involve mainly shit shoveling and hard labour, but there are people have exclusive private yards who would value a horse motivated caring groom to care for valuable charges, there may be more autonomy, less slavery and opportunity to further your riding skills

 

[Wishfilly]

Hi all. These are remarkably useful and generous responses. Thank you.
I’ll have a think and process.
I think the idea of boshing through the Stages is a good plan as I can do that whilst still at work I think.
lots to think about and thank you so much for taking the time to respond at length (and so, ahem, honestly!). Very useful.
right. Better get to work ??

I think it's very hard to get through stage 3 whilst working in another industry. I'm sure people have done it, but after Stage 2, things do get quite challenging, and if you're not riding those sorts of horses regularly (and a variety of horses), it's very hard to turn up on the day, ride the unfamiliar horses and perform to the standard required to pass. Other people may disagree, of course! Doing any of the coaching qualifications definitely is quite a big time comitment.

I think the new system (I haven't done any exams under it, mind) does also need a bit of time commitment to get various skills signed off by an appropriate person at the time e.g. clipping, loading etc- it's not the case you turn up on the day and just discuss certain things, anymore.

I don't want this to come across all negative, but I think for most people recruiting yard managers, a big part of what they want is someone with the competence to take charge in a variety of emergency situations etc- so they want a lot of horsey experience, rather than necessarily management skills (although sometimes those skills would come in handy). I think you'd also find the salary very very low for what would be expected of you.

The vast majority of riding schools (for example) employ very few staff, usually the YO, one or two visiting instructors (usually freelance), a few yard staff (grooms etc, who may be apprentices) and the person in charge of the yard will have to muck in, in all sorts of roles. There are bigger yards which are exceptions to this, but equally, they will usually expect their senior staff to be highly experienced and qualified.

In terms of full livery yards, there would be a big expectation of dealing with other people's difficult horses, and in general, the more senior staff will be expected to cope with any of the horses, regardless of how difficult they are being. There'd also potentially be a lot of the boring elements of mucking out, poopicking, filling haynets etc. I don't think many livery yards can afford to employ someone to "run the yard" who doesn't also muck in with a lot of the yard work.

I'm not saying don't do it, but I think you need to be smart about it- I'd maybe look at something like racing- the big trainers and studs often employ office based staff to keep on top of all the paperwork etc they need to do, but there would still be a horsey element to the job/environment to work in. It would still be a pay cut, I imagine, but not quite so much. Alternatively, I'd maybe look at working for a horsey brand (tack, feed etc)- I imagine you'd enjoy the culture more, and have the chance to attend horsey events etc.

Or, if you sold your house in London, would you have enough to buy a small yard elsewhere in the country? You could then get part of your income (or possibly all of it) from being a yard owner- there would be lots of downsides to this too, of course.

If you're really serious, I'd suggest trying to get some work experience on a large yard of the type you'd want to work on (I know this is difficult whilst you're also working elsewhere). This would also probably help you get through your stage exams, too!

 

[Squeak]

I wouldn't do it, don't underestimate how bad the pay is, long the hours are and physical the job is. If you're not enjoying the city could you relocate to a different area of the country, do a lot of wfh or short commute where you're close to your yard/ horse, maybe even get another horse to ride and compete and then would you have the best of both worlds?

You'd also need a job that didn't work long hours though but for the right company you could have that as a PM.

This is my compromise anyway, although at the moment I just have one horse. I work 37 hours a week and can see my horse in my lunch break and be riding by 4.30pm. I worked with horses when I was younger and I've found this the best compromise as working with horses is absolutely no fun.

 

[Brockles77]

I would say don’t do it.
I worked with horses for a good 7 years and loved the flexibility (freelance) but eventually gave it up as I was sick of having no money and I stopped enjoying my horses - after riding 5 and mucking out 10, I didn’t really fancy riding mine!

I chose a career in the emergency services so total opposite in relation to free time and I do get pangs for my old life especially when things are going well horse-wise as I miss the freedom and flexibility, but I will never ever go back and instead trying to secure a role within my organisation that is a bit more civilised office hours.

Oh LOLZ - I worked for a fair so I was all 'ooooh!".... skim reading on a smashed iPhone not great for attention to detail.

 

[Brockles77]

I wouldn't do it, don't underestimate how bad the pay is, long the hours are and physical the job is. If you're not enjoying the city could you relocate to a different area of the country, do a lot of wfh or short commute where you're close to your yard/ horse, maybe even get another horse to ride and compete and then would you have the best of both worlds?

You'd also need a job that didn't work long hours though but for the right company you could have that as a PM.

This is my compromise anyway, although at the moment I just have one horse. I work 37 hours a week and can see my horse in my lunch break and be riding by 4.30pm. I worked with horses when I was younger and I've found this the best compromise as working with horses is absolutely no fun.

I think you might be right. Madly I just passed up on applying for a really big job in Warwickshire as I wasn't really ready. I think I just need to stick it out where I am and think about it some more. Thank you!

 

[Brockles77]

I think it's very hard to get through stage 3 whilst working in another industry. I'm sure people have done it, but after Stage 2, things do get quite challenging, and if you're not riding those sorts of horses regularly (and a variety of horses), it's very hard to turn up on the day, ride the unfamiliar horses and perform to the standard required to pass. Other people may disagree, of course! Doing any of the coaching qualifications definitely is quite a big time comitment.

I think the new system (I haven't done any exams under it, mind) does also need a bit of time commitment to get various skills signed off by an appropriate person at the time e.g. clipping, loading etc- it's not the case you turn up on the day and just discuss certain things, anymore.

I don't want this to come across all negative, but I think for most people recruiting yard managers, a big part of what they want is someone with the competence to take charge in a variety of emergency situations etc- so they want a lot of horsey experience, rather than necessarily management skills (although sometimes those skills would come in handy). I think you'd also find the salary very very low for what would be expected of you.

The vast majority of riding schools (for example) employ very few staff, usually the YO, one or two visiting instructors (usually freelance), a few yard staff (grooms etc, who may be apprentices) and the person in charge of the yard will have to muck in, in all sorts of roles. There are bigger yards which are exceptions to this, but equally, they will usually expect their senior staff to be highly experienced and qualified.

In terms of full livery yards, there would be a big expectation of dealing with other people's difficult horses, and in general, the more senior staff will be expected to cope with any of the horses, regardless of how difficult they are being. There'd also potentially be a lot of the boring elements of mucking out, poopicking, filling haynets etc. I don't think many livery yards can afford to employ someone to "run the yard" who doesn't also muck in with a lot of the yard work.

I'm not saying don't do it, but I think you need to be smart about it- I'd maybe look at something like racing- the big trainers and studs often employ office based staff to keep on top of all the paperwork etc they need to do, but there would still be a horsey element to the job/environment to work in. It would still be a pay cut, I imagine, but not quite so much. Alternatively, I'd maybe look at working for a horsey brand (tack, feed etc)- I imagine you'd enjoy the culture more, and have the chance to attend horsey events etc.

Or, if you sold your house in London, would you have enough to buy a small yard elsewhere in the country? You could then get part of your income (or possibly all of it) from being a yard owner- there would be lots of downsides to this too, of course.

If you're really serious, I'd suggest trying to get some work experience on a large yard of the type you'd want to work on (I know this is difficult whilst you're also working elsewhere). This would also probably help you get through your stage exams, too!

Thank you, yes good to know (I wasn't undermining the time it took to do the later stages, I realise they require a lot). thanks for this - very helpful.

 

[Wishfilly]

Thank you, yes good to know (I wasn't undermining the time it took to do the later stages, I realise they require a lot). thanks for this - very helpful.

I think a lot of people who haven't been through the exam system (especially recently) don't realise how involved it is. When I did my Stage 2 (took more than one attempt to get all the various bits) I saw a few people who assumed because they could do everything required with their own horse(s) they'd sail through- which isn't always the case.

Back then, stage 2 was often a useful stage to get to, because it tended to be seen as "competent" to escort rides and supervise activities etc on yards by insurance companies.

 

[Fransurrey]

Whilst I love horses, I'm not sure I could cope physically with the work during winter, these days. One thing that jumps out from your post is that your horse is on full livery. If you're seriously considering a move into the equine industry, I would take a sabbatical and have your own horse on DIY first. In the winter. Some days it's all I can do to see to my own horse. The idea of being out in that weather for 8 hours would make me weep! I'm fit, too, just starting to feel my age a bit and long term chronic conditions beginning to bite (whereas before they were just a mild inconvenience).

 

[Brockles77]

Whilst I love horses, I'm not sure I could cope physically with the work during winter, these days. One thing that jumps out from your post is that your horse is on full livery. If you're seriously considering a move into the equine industry, I would take a sabbatical and have your own horse on DIY first. In the winter. Some days it's all I can do to see to my own horse. The idea of being out in that weather for 8 hours would make me weep! I'm fit, too, just starting to feel my age a bit and long term chronic conditions beginning to bite (whereas before they were just a mild inconvenience).

Hi - I have had horses before on DIY (and as a younger person helped run a riding school) - obviously my mucking out fitness isn't tip top but it'd get there. he's on full livery because he's (depending on traffic) between 28 and 55 minutes away from my house. If I go in the morning (28 mins) the rush hour traffic BACK in to the city is about an hour. Right now it's essential!

 

[humblepie]

I took a sabbatical many years ago and worked/trained at a yard for the whole summer which was great. Did go back to my office job but that was more due to me being not very adventurous. I was going to say as others have done how about trying to find an admin job that is horse related - particularly in the horse racing industry there are lots of options from racecourses to industry bodies so whilst not hands on with horses, it could be a middle ground.

 

[Midlifecrisis]

Did someone shout??lol

Im backing the thoughts of everyone else…keep horses as a hobby..if you yearn for a change there are “downsizing” jobs a plenty out of the capital where you can carve out a more bucolic lifestyle for yourself.

 

[Fransurrey]

Hi - I have had horses before on DIY (and as a younger person helped run a riding school) - obviously my mucking out fitness isn't tip top but it'd get there. he's on full livery because he's (depending on traffic) between 28 and 55 minutes away from my house. If I go in the morning (28 mins) the rush hour traffic BACK in to the city is about an hour. Right now it's essential!

Ah ok. It's only the last 5 or so years that I've found DIY a hard slog (achey joints and so on). I wasn't judging you having him on full - I can see it's essential for you. I just know people who have only had horses part/full livery and it's a real culture shock to shift to DIY!

 

[st_marks]

I think the idea of working in admin for a racing yard or horsey brand or other big operation is a great idea. I worked for a nice tack retailer for a while and that was a pretty good compromise - talking about horses all day, but always snug and indoor, and lots of cool horsey perks.

Another idea would be to explore areas like bodywork/massage, saddle fitting, bit fitting, etc... I'm in the States so I know the infrastructure is different - we just have LESS of all of these services, maybe your area is bursting with them - but I know a fair few people who do equine massage part time.