Most Embarrassing Things That Your Horses Have Done?

A

Arizahn

Well-Known Member
Joined
25 May 2011
Messages
4,297
Visit site
The Camel once decided to trot the length of the arena farting happily at all within earshot...it was almost musical! :D

What are yours?
 
CM whipped round faster than you can blink once just as we arrived at my instructors yard for a lesson. My instructor and a livery were standing right infront of us as she pinged me out the side door.

She also had a real thing for my instructor's ex eventer and I couldn't let her stop as we rode past his field, or she'd pee, squeal and wink at him and there was s*d all that i could do to get her moving again, bar waiting for her to finish her little 'display'.

She also once napped towards a jump during a lesson and we ended up heading for my poor instructor, who instinctively flapped her arms at the horse heading right for her. It ended up with me falling off to one side and CM cantering past the other side of my instructor who was luckily avoided by all.



I bet she misses teaching us! LOL. :p :D
 
Whilst standing to be judged in a ridden large breeds M&M class, my highland, who can detect an extra strong mint from 100 meters away, decided to mug the judge for a peppermint!! In spite of my better efforts to stop him, the poor man's pockets were thoroughly frisked to detect the packet of mints he had concealed in his jacket!
 
Ohhhhhhh so many, which to choose from? :D

I think the worst is when we moved yards. New yard shares a lot of lovely trails in the forest with other private horse yards, so it's normal to meet strange riders and horses out on the tracks. First time out hacking on the new yard we met a pair of immaculate geldings and their riders. We all stopped to say hello to each other and my mare proceeded to prance, dance, flash her ladybits and scream at them :( I decided to climb off the little tramp to try and regain some control. Then when I got off her she spooked at a duck who flew out of the reed bed nearby and trampled me in the mud. Lesson learned.
 
My mare dragging me round the in hand VETERAN class!! Cantering, bucking and farting along the way lol.

Show grounds always put her on her toes but this class was running really late and she had completely boiled over by then. We did win the earlier one though lol.
 
My Forester spun her backside round and attempted to double barrel the judge at Ponies UK one year :O No warning or anything, I just stood her up in front of him and the next thing, Bang :O She missed but I was mortified, could not apologise enough and was fully expecting the steward to tell us to leave the ring, but all that happened was we got moved 2 places down the line up.
 
Not my horse but years ago when I was at a dressage just as the girl was halting her horse at x and about to salute the horse decided to have a wee! and it was a really long wee!!!
 
Old horse....misbehaved badly in the veteran class and got moved down to second place for trampling the judge.
Daughters pony....stopped for a massive wee....plus explosive trumps....out hacking in the woods, just as an entire family including granny, kids n dogs went past. Lots of nodding, smiling and no body mentioned the steam of steaming urine and musical accompaniment.
Current horse....spooked at a patch of grass, flung me out the side door and galloped off home...leaving me to run after him in full hi viz whilst pretending not to see dog walker in next field.
OHs mare....mistress of the cough/fart manoeuvre.....usually in public. We joke her gearbox had fallen out.
 
Out hacking on a lovely summers day. Walking past a pub with a garden at the front packed with people eating lunch. My boy stops and proceeds to do the longest wee ever, bit like a sunami, with very loud farts. The odd thing was he wee'd on the road, never known him to do that before or since, always wee'd on soft ground.
 
my old boy, managed to fart the entire length of a church yard, with the wedding party standing in the churchyard, videoing the bridal party, I can imagine the laugh when they went to play the video and all the sound track consisted of was one long series of horse farts!
 
I used for ride a horse that used to spook at lots things. I was riding him around a field with a friend and he (the horse) farted and bolted across the field.
 
32 yr old 11hh pony in all his glory, who iv inherited from a friend attempting to mount my 16.2 mare last summer, who all bent sat down for him flashing all her bits and nickering very coquettishly in front of my 12 yr old helper....... never envisaged having to do a birds and bees Q+A for someone else's kid!
 
I am soooo pleased it's not just my girl who is jet propelled by farts!! She farts constantly - no idea why as she is on the same feed/routine as the other Exmoors and they don't have the same wind problems!
Her most embarrassing moment though has to be when she decided to go for a paddle in a drainage ditch and required 24 firemen, a vet and a friendly farmer to get her out...can laugh now as she wasn't injured at all but it was a very scary evening as it happened! I do still think 24 firemen is slightly excessive but then again, she is a massive flirt so she was probably loving it! I still have some of the local firemen who were on duty that night asking how she is when I meet them in the supermarket! :D
 
Driving Cellwen Cach Fach (Litle S***) out one day. Stopped at traffic lights. First in queue and a line of cars behind us. Just as lights changed to green he decided he needed a wee. No one went anywhere and by the time he had fully relieved himself, lights were back to red!
 
Very in season mare standing next to a stallion in a show line up. Squatted and peed just as the judge was walking by - and the judge wore it. There is nothing more shameless than a tarty mare! I have to say that the stallion was a total gentleman!
 
Nancykitt said:
Most of mine involve horse flatulence, but few things were as embarrassing as the time I was putting boots on my Connie's hind legs at a busy farm ride and he lifted his tail and pooed directly on to my head. Complete strangers were doubled up laughing.
Click to expand...

it must be a connie thing! my 4yr old is connie x tb and every time I put his boots on or hold a back foot for too long he poos! how he's not got me on the head yet ill never know! he did poo in my tack box a couple of weeks ago though! yuck!
 
Janah said:
Out hacking on a lovely summers day. Walking past a pub with a garden at the front packed with people eating lunch. My boy stops and proceeds to do the longest wee ever, bit like a sunami, with very loud farts. The odd thing was he wee'd on the road, never known him to do that before or since, always wee'd on soft ground.
Click to expand...

My first pony did that when I was 13 and on the way back from a PC rally. I was mortified and actually considered getting off and leaving him. The whole pub were pointing at his bits and laughing.

My current mare, on a riding club camp at Somerford, had a disagreement with the mare in the stable next door and kicked the wall so hard she moved the partition of the American barn half a foot. We were all outside having a BBQ, going "whose is that noisy horse!"...
 
Flashy Friesian prances out onto the yard, all tacked up and sparkling, swishing his mane in a "look how handsome I am" smug kinda way.

The on lookers who were waiting for pony rides were all ooohing and aaahing at his "magical" beauty. He ofc decided once he had got everyones attention , to open the flood gates and unleash a few gallons - all running down the yard towards to onlookers- with ofc the satisfied groan at the end. Que lots of little kiddies asking why he is peeing infont of everyone, and not in the bathroom! I could only laugh at him :p

I also took a very important phone call while in his stable, after we said hello and introduced ourselves, he let rip an all mighty fart! I couldn't think what to say! The person on the other side laughed nervously! lmao!
 
My new pony was playing with the end of the lead-rope today while I was holding her, and the vet was talking to me. She grabbed it, swung it and full on whacked me in the face with it.
Smooth.
 
Held up traffic in both directions because the garden centre was getting a delivery and the cages were rattling loudly. A kind driver got out of the car to ask them to stop for a mo.

Thank goodness, I thought. I can get out of everyone's way (Big queues of traffic both sides). But no, Red stands there for a long and drawn out poo. The ever so patient drivers suddenly didn't look so patient, and the bus driver was frowning and shaking his head at me... Oopsie!

He also took an apple from a tree we were passing once! The lady who's garden it was was gardening at the time, luckily she found it amusing!

Ax
 
I had not long moved Dave to the yard we're still at, in fact it would have been one of the first occasions that he was turned out following quarantine. Given it was bitterly cold our lovely YO had offered to change rugs for me. I was sitting in the ambulance at hospital, waiting for the next 999 to be given to us when my text alert sounded. "Can I ask you what might seem like an odd question?". Of course I immediately said yes......."Does Dave erm, always get his willy out when you rug him up?!?". Felt awful for forgetting to warn her, said so adding that it wasn't unusual at all!!

A minute later text alert goes again......."Ewwwww, I reached for the surcingle and it pinged up and hit me on the arm!!!!"
 
The most embarrassing thing my gelding ever did was the day a lady came to try my mare out. We were sat on the yard having a coffee admiring the ponies. A mare trotted over to my gelding and started winking at him over the fence. I said I was glad I had a gelding as I didn't have to put up with any embarrassing displays of affection. As if on cue, my gelding took out his man hood and started to whack his stomach with it while giving the mare a dirty look and grunting! I was mortified! He had never done it before and has never done it since!
 
my horse is pretty well mannered out with his wees, poos, and farts . He does do the most digusting fart, wee and grunt at the same time when turned out though! His most shameful moment had to be when I hacked him out, and a little boy wanted to stroke him. He is usually the sweetest, softest horse ever and will stand all day to be fussed. The mother lifted up the child to his face and my horse reached out with his nose, then "nose-butted" the poor kid in the chest :o knocking him and the mother back! I was mortified, they looked horrified and walked off.
 
My mare decided to reverse up to a full wheelie bin at a show last year and knock it flying (she was trying to rub her bum on it), sending rubbish all over the place. Unfortunately it was quite a windy day, so hot dog/burger wrappers etc started blowing all over the place, into the rings etc. I wanted the ground to swallow me up.
 
Pie regularly embarrasses me by stopping for a wee and blocking the road. He has also spooked himself mid-wee when the river of widdle ran down past his front legs much to the amusement of waiting drivers.
He also likes waving his boy bits around - anything exciting (treats, dinner, rugs, turnout) and he has to whop it out and smack his belly with it. Embarrassing when there are small children around!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top