Narty situation...advice appreciated

he sounds like an awful person, well done for getting away.
Could you not get a friend to buy the horse cheap off him?? then 'buy' off your friend?
 
Well done for getting out! You need some legal advice and support, maybe contact your local CAB and see if they can provide it for free.

If you have an understanding YO then you can do as a friend did in this situation. The YO charged the other party 50% of the cost of keeping the horse until it could be sold as a joint asset (obviously as long as a piece of string as the other partner would not sell). At the point the bill was at the value that person owned of the horse they offered to not pursue the bill if the horse was surrendered to them for selling or loaning. At this point the horse was then given to the person who was by now 6 months ahead with her livery payments in exchange for no longer being in credit. Not sure this would work if your ex is using the horse as a weapon and the YO is wary but could be worth a try.
 
It is quite simple. As the horse was a gift to you then the horse was gifted to you and belongs to you. You need to be able to demonstrate that you have proof that the horse was a present to you. The passport is not proof of ownership (although passports by law should be kept at the yard if the horse is on full livery as they would be deemed to be the registered keeper). At this stage I would get receipts/invoices for everything you paid out for the horse so that you have them at hand. Definately go to Citizens Advice and/or see a solicitor.
 
Having been in a very similar marital situation, I can sympathise! The way your partner is behaving over the horse just now is simply another way of controlling YOU, it has little, if anything to do with the horse or the money involved.

You've had good advice about who to contact - a solicitor is you first call, find one who specialises in relationship issues. There should be an organisation locally, maybe a charity, who is set up to help victims of domestic abuse, these would be the people who can advise you of the best firm of solicitor's etc if the police can't, or if you're not ready to go that route yet.

Something that no-one has mentioned yet, contact the organisation who issued the passport, tell them there is an ownership dispute and you are afraid that the horse may be sold before the dispute is settled - maybe they can refuse transfer of ownership. Equally, if the horse is still registered in the previous owner's name, it may be worth contacting them especially if they cared about the horse, as they won't want to think the future of the horse may be uncertain.

Good luck, and don't be afraid to pm me if you want someone to talk to!
 
If he has injured you as you say you should be able to get an injunction against him at the very least - that will keep him away from anywhere you would reasonably go - the house, stables etc
If he has committed that level of violence social services will not want him anywhere near your children - in fact they are at risk of being removed if you stay with him !
As the horse was a gift I don't think it can be sold by him to fund a split but if you follow the above he has no rights anyway.
Please see a solicitor and go back to the police and say you want to press charges. They will only not act if they think you are unwilling to see it through to court - they are duty bound to protect you. It is good that they took pictures ... often they will do this on the assumption that at some point in the future you will come round to a prosecution.
Well done on breaking away - now is the time to plan for your own, your children's and your horses future security.
 
Thank you all, i have told him he has 24 hours to SIGN over the horse to me along with anything he has of hers (then i will place restraining order on him) OR i will being visiting a solicitor tomorrow and also claiming for all personal injuries has has caused and then i will fight tooth and nail to have my horse with me.
I have fought the vile man for 3 years and this time i am going to win.

Thank you all :hugs:
 
ballysmum said:
Thank you all, i have told him he has 24 hours to SIGN over the horse to me along with anything he has of hers (then i will place restraining order on him) OR i will being visiting a solicitor tomorrow and also claiming for all personal injuries has has caused and then i will fight tooth and nail to have my horse with me.
I have fought the vile man for 3 years and this time i am going to win.

Thank you all :hugs:
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Good for you. Hope all goes well and let us know the outcome tomorrow about signing her over :) x
 
it may sound callous but if you have been physically hurt like that and you have children/a child stop worrying about the horse leave the YO to deal with that and walk away. you have had her 6wks, its great to have a horse but surely yours and your childs/childrens safety comes first-what are you doing keeping this link (horse) between the two of you?

if you haven't got the money to by him out tough and if you did he would probably find some other way to make your life a misery-you got out (fantastic-well done) now you need to man up and move on
 
I asked for advice... not opinions and judgements of my circumstances....
I asked for the best way to deal with this without a horse being neglected and me to come out on top for a change. My daughter is extremely safe and happy and i also have called social services myself to ensure things stay that way however as this was a horse forum i didnt think my daughter needed to be brought into the discussion. Man up... i have more balls than most so i dont think thats needed somehow....

Narly :rolleyes: Nasty... my bad typo! sorry!

All constructive comments again, many thanks
 
amymay said:
My yard doesn't have mine.
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Under the legislation a horse should have its passport with it at all times, exceptions being when hacking out or being turned out. If a horse is at livery the passport must be with the keeper not the owner.

When my horses go away to stud in France or for training, their passports go with them.
 
Rollin said:
Under the legislation a horse should have its passport with it at all times, exceptions being when hacking out or being turned out. If a horse is at livery the passport must be with the keeper not the owner.

When my horses go away to stud in France or for training, their passports go with them.
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I thought they were going to bring in a law that said YOs have passports but never did. If the horse is on full livery they should have it but not DIY. Its the person who has day to day involvement so, yes, if the horse goes away they take their passport but normal stabling the Owner keeps it.
 
ballysmum said:
Thank you all, i have told him he has 24 hours to SIGN over the horse to me along with anything he has of hers (then i will place restraining order on him) OR i will being visiting a solicitor tomorrow and also claiming for all personal injuries has has caused and then i will fight tooth and nail to have my horse with me.
I have fought the vile man for 3 years and this time i am going to win.

Thank you all :hugs:
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You sound incredibly strong and at the risk of sounding corny I will say 'You go girl!' lol, don't let him win! Can't offer any more advice than what's been said, but huge hugs xxx
 
Has the passport been registered in his name and do you have receipts ? All of this can go toward proof it was a gift or owned by you as you mention paying the rest of the debt off ?

Hope you mange to resolve it, you are very strong for leaving this type of person, i hope you stay strong and don't go back, I understand its not easy but years down the line you won't believe you ever allowed it to happen.
 
Get advice. Horse was a gift and his lack of history with horses will support this as will those who witnessed you care for it. Move horse and write to weatherbys for replacement passport. Well done getting out now get horse and stay out x x
 
Firstly, well done for extracting yourself from this awful situation. While you have had excellent advice on here re solicitor etc, I think you will find the reality is actually a little more in your favour. As proven time and time again with horses missing on loan, the police are NOT interested in horse ownership as they deem it to be a civil case so you won't have them dragged round. I do also feel for the YO who will not have wanted to be involved in this either!. You can drag this out which you clearly do not want to do or just offer a sum which is fair. Then move the horse so he would not know where it is. I am sure you can dig your heels in but you obviously want to be completely rid of this dreadful man so actually I would be inclined to show a market price, take out the costs of livery etc you have incurred and what you already paid, then pay the difference. Alternatively, if your YO is up for this, then tell them you are no longer paying livery, horse is on full livery and your ex has to foot the bill. Advise them privately you will save the money you would normally pay so they are not out of pocket but this might force your ex to settle for a more reasonable sum more quickly. Good luck and again, WELL DONE for extracting yourself...
 
What a total arse!

I would go to yard and take horse.
Move it to another yard.
Leave him a letter say have horse and will pay balance.

You cant leave him to look after her. He is neglecting her and doesn't actually know how to look after her.
If he calls the police you call the rspca as he is not the best person to look after her.
If he was abusive to you play on the fact he has a temper and can not care for this sensitive horse.

This may not be right or legal but its what i would do.

Try to talk properly ass sensibly to him, he cant use the horse for you to take him back.
 
I don't think I'd even leave a letter. Anything in writing to say that you owe him anything for her? She's a gift surely? As it's a welfare issue I must admit I'd be loading her up and taking her into hiding while he is at work. But of course, you do also need to seek legal advice and the CAB might be a useful start.
 
What a horrible person. I hope you get this sorted.

I was wondering, re the passport. Has he actually made the effort to change ownership details to his? It takes time, effort and a bit of knowing what you’re doing to change the ownership details, and there's usually a fee to pay.

I think what I would do, (I'm guessing he probably hasn't changed ownership) is apply for a new passport, as yours has been lost/stolen (by him), with your details in. It's very easy to do, via all sorts of organisations; The BHS, the pleasure horse society, and the veteran horse society are just a few organisations who issue them. At the end of the day, horse passports are really only to regulate the meat for human consumption trade, and of course on a more local scale, you need to keep your vaccination records in them in order to compete, particularly at club and affiliated level, in a national effort to prevent the spread of disease. They hold no legal value in determining ownership.
 
I would get legal advise before doing anything. Keep receipts for any feed etc purchased for the horse.

I would not be moving the horse under any circumstances - also assumung the fact no passport, and you would have to pay the YO a months livery before you can go.
 
newera said:
I think what I would do, (I'm guessing he probably hasn't changed ownership) is apply for a new passport, as yours has been lost/stolen (by him), with your details in. It's very easy to do, via all sorts of organisations; The BHS, the pleasure horse society, and the veteran horse society are just a few organisations who issue them. At the end of the day, horse passports are really only to regulate the meat for human consumption trade, and of course on a more local scale, you need to keep your vaccination records in them in order to compete, particularly at club and affiliated level, in a national effort to prevent the spread of disease. They hold no legal value in determining ownership.
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AFAIK, applying to a different PIO for a horse that you know already has an exisiting passport is illegal. This horse will be registered with Wetherbys, and be microchipped.
 
Well done for getting out, its not easy to walk away and I really hope you don't go back because thats the hardest part - they NEVER change their spots!

Re the horse I'm sorry i can't give you any advice but I really hope you get it sorted out swiftly. Try this lot they are very helpful and have a legal team http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/ its a 24hrs hotline.
 
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