Need help!

PinkFairy

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Hi everyone.

I have three staff bitches, two of the same age and one who is younger. We got one of the older ones in March but the other two have been together since puppies. They're not really best friends with the new staffie, but they are pretty civil with each other and don't fight or growl etc.

Anyways, at dinner times, I've become a bit of an interfering cow and I blame myself completely for the problem I have, and I feel really guilty! I feed them all at the same time but I move their dishes apart as the two we've had since puppies will always try and steal the other one's food, but because the new dog won't get into a fight or anything, she gets bullied away and ends up going back to her bed and letting one of the others eat her dinner. I decided to (stupidly perhaps) butt in and try my best to make sure they all get their own dinners, so if I see them trying to steal another one, or bullying another one away then I'll make a loud noise - normally I say "Out!" or I'd call their name and they'd stop, other times I admit, I've tapped them on the nose/bum to get them to leave it alone.

My problem is that because I've been butting in like this, one of the older dogs who has been here since a puppy, now won't eat her dinner. I know I'm the reason why, she sees me and she goes back to the sofa and won't come back to the kitchen unless I put on my most playful voice and lure her, even then she won't eat from her bowl, she either walks away or turns her face completely away from it.

Last night I tried to get her to at least eat from my hand, she wouldn't touch it and kept turning her face away. I tried praising her for coming over, and making her understand she had done nothing wrong but she still wouldn't eat. About 30 minutes later, she finally had a few bits but wouldn't eat from her bowl and getting her to eat even two meaty chunk biscuits was a huge ordeal. I tried to put the dish in a separate room from the other two, I tried shutting the kitchen door and separating myself, she just stood at the door waiting to be let back into the living room. :(

I feel terrible that my dog has such a problem with eating because I decided to interfere - it's so unlike her, she's normally the first to finish because she practically inhales her food. :rolleyes: I tried to use the dinner as treats, asking them to sit, give their paw etc and she was really hesitant to join in but the other two were fine.

She's alot closer to my OH, so when he got home I explained everything and he tried to get her to eat and she refused. He spent about an hour with her on the sofa just giving her attention and she seemed a bit better but still wouldn't eat from her bowl.

I tried to get her excited by asking her where her ball was as this usually gets her whizzing around but she just sat and stared at me.

I hate the fact my dog could see me as such a negative thing. :(

Please help, I feel terrible. :(

Apologies for the essay.
 
Well I would agree it was not the best way to feed them, I would invest in a crate to feed the slow eater or feed her in another room and leave the 2 piggies to eat theirs, I do actually tell dogs off for pigging in to other dogs bowls but never smack I just say " ah ah" and stand near the bowl and they slink off.
I never have to tell my own any more the fast eaters eat and then go off and about their business whilst the slower ones finish a meal, they will not eat form the others bowls unless they have left the bowl with food in (never happens here) my lot are healthy eaters:D

If this is just today and a 1st time occourance I would question if she is ok in herself or maybe a bit off colour?.
I would have placed her in another room and left her alone to eat and this would tell you weather you are the problem.
From now on I would feed the slow eater on her own and avoid the whole issue, or place a kong in each of the faster eaters bowls to slow them down a little.

Ps, I would only give the slow eater a small window in which to clear the bowl too, say 10 minutes, this may teach her that food has to go down the hatchet or goes back in the bag till the next meal.
 
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Thanks Cayla.

It's not a one time thing, she's been a bit funny at dinnertimes for a while and I think it's because she's used to getting told off for stealing food that she just avoids her dinner to avoid being told off but I hate how nervous she's become. :(

I love all my dogs to pieces, they're my babies and I really am horrified to see the effect it's had on my poor girl. I'm trying to type my reply with one hand, the other two are laid on my lap and one my my side and the nervous one is across the room by herself. :(

I had a cookie earlier and broke it into three pieces, they ALL came over for that, it seems to be just her dinner that is the problem.
 
Just thought I would add that I've been out, bought some bones as treats for them all and she was quite keen to start wolfing it down and she's still gnawing at it now and I gave it to her about 20 minutes ago. So I think it's just dinner she has an issue with. I think I'm going to feed them as normal, but leave them straight away rather than hang around, my presence seems to put her off but yesterday she turned and ran away before I even put the bowl on the floor. :(
 
Just thought I would add that I've been out, bought some bones as treats for them all and she was quite keen to start wolfing it down and she's still gnawing at it now and I gave it to her about 20 minutes ago. So I think it's just dinner she has an issue with. I think I'm going to feed them as normal, but leave them straight away rather than hang around, my presence seems to put her off but yesterday she turned and ran away before I even put the bowl on the floor. :(


Be aware that this is how fight break out so still hang around in ear shot or place slow eater in another room.
She may not always slink back to her bed but choose to put up a fight for that food, which could end up in world war 3.:)
 
Mine get fed in seperate rooms (well 2 and a 3rd) basically Dylan and Teal just chomp down and are fed outside and Will gets fed indoors on the tiles.


Will takes a bit longer and cant defend him self. He was a bit fussy when I got him so like Cayla said a set window and food goes, he soon learnt. He sometimes looks at me as if whats this c**p (hes on raw but gets a few days a week of senior mix this is what he wont eat happily but he just needs that oomph to keep weight on).
 
I would probably mix something irresistible into her food and leave her well alone (separate from the others) and then after she is done praise and initiate a game of some kind.
 
"Last night I tried to get her to at least eat from my hand, she wouldn't touch it and kept turning her face away. I tried praising her for coming over, and making her understand she had done nothing wrong but she still wouldn't eat. About 30 minutes later, she finally had a few bits but wouldn't eat from her bowl and getting her to eat even two meaty chunk biscuits was a huge ordeal. I tried to put the dish in a separate room from the other two, I tried shutting the kitchen door and separating myself, she just stood at the door waiting to be let back into the living room."

^^Read that bit back and think how the dog sees that, sounds like a bit of a session, doesn't it? Not a fun meal time. Someone standing watching her all the time, stress coming out, worry, pleeease, pleeeeeeease eat.

She sounds like a sensitive soul and despite the fact you are stressing *about* her, all she feels is stress.
You're putting too much pressure on her. Chill out. She is associating food with stress, because you have been stressing at mealtimes.
Stop feeling guilty, it's done now, guilt is still a negative emotion.

Just feed them apart and leave her to it. She will not starve herself.
 
Honestly don't make a fuss over it. Unless it goes on for a few days. But for now go about your daily routine and she'll eat when she wants :)
 
You've trained her too well!

I'd feed her separately or at a different time, certainly without the others present and maybe leave her in a room on her own with the food. Let her realise that it's ok to eat her tea.
 
Thanks everyone, last night she ate from her bowl (and the other bowls too ;) ) only little bits but I was so pleased she was eating. :)

They never fight over treats to be honest, they normally all go in different directions and hole up til they've finished - never had a problem with treats before.

OH and I fed them all last night as we would do normally and just walked away/carried about our own routine, preparing dinner etc and she came and went as she wanted to but picked at it most of the time.

OH agrees with you all - she'll eat when she wants and won't starve herself, he also thinks I've been way too fussy... I can't argue with that!!

Thanks again everyone, hopefully she'll go back to her normal self of stuffing her face at dinner time. :)
 
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