Owning a horse is never a sensible decision… discuss

[Cloball]

It has put me back in touch with the rhythm of nature and the seasons that going from house to car to work just doesn't. I appreciate a dog might do the same but it's always been horses and cats for me they smell much better imo . My hands are warmer, I'm more grounded in the present, I'm down 2 ISH dress sizes and I've made some lovely new friends.

I've always hated being called sensible, someone called me sensible aged 10.and I've never forgotten it. I've been rebelling against it ever since

 

[I'm Dun]

I've likened it to being an addict to non horsey people. There's a lot (probably everything) I'd give up before I'd give up horses. In my 20s I about lost my house trying to fix and keep my horse...

This! I broke free finally having nearly killed myself keeping going while such a physical wreck. It took me 2yrs of slowly downsize and a complete life change to do it and even then there was a LOT of tears, but I have no regrets. I'm glad I did it, but I'm glad I'm done now. There is a whole world outside of horses and I've seen a fair bit more of it since I gave up.

 

[Cortez]

It was certainly sensible for me since I've made my living with horses for more than 50 years. It's also sensible now for me to walk away, I have neither the ability nor the desire to continue to devote the time and effort required.

 

[dottylottie]

as i’m sure everyone is sick of hearing, i bought my first 2 horses and they both went lame within 2 months - not the start to ownership i imagined!

it seems for every positive scan, they feel the need to do something utterly stupid and i’ve probably cried more in the last year over the daft animals than i have my whole life

but then we go for a nice hack, or we have a nice relaxing grooming session and i just think…”at least it’s not drugs”

in reality, they might cost an absolute fortune and cause me an awful lot of stress, but on the whole my mental and physical health is benefiting no end - im more active, i socialise more (still not much lol), i snack a whole lot less, and i even found in summer the sun seemed to help the little patch of eczema i get, because i’d usually hide inside away from the sun

 

[Birker2020]

Yes they give me a reason to get up in the morning and are my version of Prozac but some days they are also the reason I sit in a wet field sobbing my heart out.


Discuss

I could have written this. I think it's crazy how we spend thousands on our horse, invest time, love,
money, emotions and get knocked back again and again but still feel we want to 'fight for the right to party'.

No other hobby would you be so invested.

When it goes right it's heaven but there have been times when I have felt so emotionally drained by it all I do question if I want to do it again.

But like you, I can't imagine not having a horse in my life. Two thirds of my life so far has been in their company, its all I know.

 

[Birker2020]

It was certainly sensible for me since I've made my living with horses for more than 50 years. It's also sensible now for me to walk away, I have neither the ability nor the desire to continue to devote the time and effort required.

I think when you have reached that stage it is understandable Cortez.

The novelty has to wear off eventually for us all surely?

 

[Cortez]

I think when you have reached that stage it is understandable Cortez.

The novelty has to wear off eventually for us all surely?

Oh the novelty is still there, it's just I don't have to/want to do it any more.

 

[Goldenstar]

I am close to closing the horse chapter of my life now.
It’s coming I won’t buy any more horses now .
I always wanted to walk away not be pushed not to wait until I can’t do it right anymore .
I can’t quite see what the end will be like but I know it’s close.

 

[Clodagh]

I transferred my addiction to dogs, which are far easier, and don’t generally try to kill you. However when I’m trudging round the paddock in horizontal lashing rain I now envy people who’s dogs just crap in the garden while they stay indoors.
#theresalwaysanewgoal.

 

[Snow Falcon]

I don't know where I would be without mine. 4 decades of riding, owning, breeding and loving them. They are a very close 2nd to my kids. I have shared some wonderful moments with them, friends and family. My eldest rode up until last year and I'll treasure that time we spent together. Sensible? I think so, I live a clean life other than the occasional Baileys, so my money is spent on something I love. Yes, there have been difficult times and heartbreaking ones too but at present they are good for my mental wellbeing and health. You can't put a price on that.

 

[GypsGal1718]

Our life wouldn’t be worth living without them. Some people want to have savings and designer items but imo life is too short for not being fulfilled. There will be hard times but we live for those moments where they make us feel invincible.

 

[paddy555]

. There is a whole world outside of horses and I've seen a fair bit more of it since I gave up.

it probably makes a difference if you are not the only one invested in the wretched creatures.

If I gave up I would still have an OH keeping horses and asking every morning if we were going to ride (we do, daily) should he get his horse in etc etc. All of this is whilst I just want to sit there in peace drinking my breakfast coffee.

OTOH there is never a problem about money etc. The horses come first for him (and me) and he totally understands the money they require. Plus he takes his turn sitting up all night with them if they are ill.

My only problem with him is that I don't ever mention a horse is for sale and most definitely don't mention a rescue in a difficult situation. I can be sure it will have arrived by teatime if not sooner. Definitely don't mention a stallion for sale nor an arab.

I'm not sure what this whole world outside of horses is. He is older than me and the horse novelty is far from wearing off.

 

[Clodagh]

it probably makes a difference if you are not the only one invested in the wretched creatures.

If I gave up I would still have an OH keeping horses and asking every morning if we were going to ride (we do, daily) should he get his horse in etc etc. All of this is whilst I just want to sit there in peace drinking my breakfast coffee.

OTOH there is never a problem about money etc. The horses come first for him (and me) and he totally understands the money they require. Plus he takes his turn sitting up all night with them if they are ill.

My only problem with him is that I don't ever mention a horse is for sale and most definitely don't mention a rescue in a difficult situation. I can be sure it will have arrived by teatime if not sooner. Definitely don't mention a stallion for sale nor an arab.

I'm not sure what this whole world outside of horses is. He is older than mean and the horse novelty is far from wearing off.

My saving grace is as my OH, while never dismissive and always supportive, loathed the things.
When my last boy was pts he was taking the fence down as he was being winched up the ramp, no more! No more!

 

[BallyRoanBaubles]

I transferred my addiction to dogs, which are far easier, and don’t generally try to kill you. However when I’m trudging round the paddock in horizontal lashing rain I now envy people who’s dogs just crap in the garden while they stay indoors.
#theresalwaysanewgoal.

Far cheaper too I find

 

[ycbm]

My saving grace is as my OH, while never dismissive and always supportive, loathed the things.
When my last boy was pts he was taking the fence down as he was being winched up the ramp, no more! No more!

I've promised my OH that he will never see me falling to pieces about having a horse PTS again, it's too painful for us both.
.

 

[Clodagh]

Far cheaper too I find

I don’t know, on the whole I spend about the same. Tawny’s maintenance bills are hideous and they eat food that costs about 5 x bag what I spent on horse food.
I did keep my horses at home and we made our own hay and I got free bedding from my brothers wood yard. I’ve no idea how anyone ‘normal’ affords full livery.

 

[ycbm]

I did keep my horses at home and we made our own hay and I got free bedding from my brothers wood yard. I’ve no idea how anyone ‘normal’ affords full livery.

I never claimed to be normal

 

[BallyRoanBaubles]

I don’t know, on the whole I spend about the same. Tawny’s maintenance bills are hideous and they eat food that costs about 5 x bag what I spent on horse food.
I did keep my horses at home and we made our own hay and I got free bedding from my brothers wood yard. I’ve no idea how anyone ‘normal’ affords full livery.

I was on a ‘cheap’ livery yard which was still a lot of money and probably why I think dogs are much cheaper!

 

[teapot]

An interesting side point of this thread is how some seem to imply there's no life worth living outside of horses?

Maybe it's because my life is driven partly by my own health and have finally learnt to adapt accordingly (or the five years in equestrian ops management) but I do wonder what would happen to someone, anyone, who suddenly couldn't ride or have horses that has this belief that horses are the be all and end all. While life is short and for living etc, it can also change overnight...

A friend (who without fail has at least one lesson a week, plus a clinic or extra as a non-owner) found the lockdowns absolute hell as she put SO much into her riding, she didn't know what to do to fill the void - sometimes all your eggs in one basket isn't necessarily a good thing.

 

[Clodagh]

An interesting side point of this thread is how some seem to imply there's no life worth living outside of horses?

Maybe it's because my life is driven partly by my own health and have finally learnt to adapt accordingly, but I do wonder what would happen to someone, anyone, who suddenly couldn't ride or have horses that has this belief that horses are the be all and end all. While life is short and for living etc, it can also change overnight...

A friend (who without fail has at least one lesson a week, plus a clinic or extra as a non-owner) found the lockdowns absolute hell as she put SO much into her riding, she didn't know what to do to fill the void - sometimes all your eggs in one basket isn't necessarily a good thing.

Because if you are paying say £500 pcm just for your hobby to have day to day care you probably can’t afford to try anything else?

 

[Cortez]

An interesting side point of this thread is how some seem to imply there's no life worth living outside of horses?

Maybe it's because my life is driven partly by my own health and have finally learnt to adapt accordingly, but I do wonder what would happen to someone, anyone, who suddenly couldn't ride or have horses that has this belief that horses are the be all and end all. While life is short and for living etc, it can also change overnight...

A friend (who without fail has at least one lesson a week, plus a clinic or extra as a non-owner) found the lockdowns absolute hell as she puts SO much into her riding, she didn't know what to do to fill the void - sometimes all your eggs in one basket isn't necessarily a good thing.

If I had had to give up in my "prime", so to speak, I'm sure it would have been devastating. I consider myself immensely privileged to have been able to achieve everything I ever wanted to with horses, and more. I have nothing left to give, or get, from a horsey life. Time to move on.

 

[JBM]

I would be rich without horses but I’d be bored

 

[Cortez]

I would be rich without horses but I’d be bored

There are other things out there to engage the interest, which I am enjoying immensely.

 

[Crazy_cat_lady]

I used to be obsessed growing up, and always wanted my own and wouldn't listen to any of the sensible comments about how expensive they were

I gave up due to finances with the cost of living increases, I knew I'd need to support more with bills and house costs and couldn't expect OH to bare the load when he was already putting in more (earns more)

I'd already got to the point though at that stage where I was done with the horse world. People saying they help their mental health, the last couple of years it was actually making mine worse, I didn't enjoy going to the yard, I didn't enjoy riding by the time I'd done the chores, I was sick of spending so much money on horse costs, I didn't like that I couldn't help OH more with the bills etc.

I don't miss it at all, I've ridden once since I gave up. If I went somewhere where a beach ride was available, I'd do that but I don't miss ownership. The only way I'd ever get into it again was with a massive euromillions win, and my own land and nice stables.

I am no longer the horse mad little girl I was growing up. The love is well and truly gone.

I think another thing that caused the passion to go, was it all got so serious. The times I look back on most fondly are messing around on the rs ponies with the other helpers and loanees of said ponies. Playing at gymkhana games, blasting them round the fields, generally messing about. It almost became frowned upon and to me a lot of the fun died. It's not my sole reason for loss of interest, the never ending costs were a huge part, but as one by one members of the "gang" of us who were there left, it didn't help. The times I most enjoyed of having my own were going for a blast across the fields.

I don't miss stressing about the costs at all. When the house needed a repair, I was able to equally contribute. I've needed to put more into the bills due to the increase in everything and don't regret my decision to give up one bit. I'd have laughed at this when I was a teenager and said I'd never give up!

Now cats, especially the ragdoll breed? That I would never give up, and could be considered a true obsession. I am BESOTTED with mine and would have more if I could

As Cortez (I think) said there is a whole world outside of horses. They aren't the be all and end all I once thought they were.

 

[teapot]

Because if you are paying say £500 pcm just for your hobby to have day to day care you probably can’t afford to try anything else?

I get the costs thing for definite, and indeed time!

However I meant more those who are perhaps a bit blinkered to the wider world, or even having an awareness there is more to life than being ankle deep in mud and soaked through. Just a musing as I see it an awful lot on social media, esepcially as the winters get worse. The constant moaning etc yet perhaps the it's a choice you make has been forgotten? Food for thought as the climate gets worse and costs continue to rise. I wonder if anyone has looked at whether ownership is on the decline?

 

[ycbm]

An interesting side point of this thread is how some seem to imply there's no life worth living outside of horses?

Maybe it's because my life is driven partly by my own health and have finally learnt to adapt accordingly, but I do wonder what would happen to someone, anyone, who suddenly couldn't ride or have horses that has this belief that horses are the be all and end all. While life is short and for living etc, it can also change overnight...

A friend (who without fail has at least one lesson a week, plus a clinic or extra as a non-owner) found the lockdowns absolute hell as she puts SO much into her riding, she didn't know what to do to fill the void - sometimes all your eggs in one basket isn't necessarily a good thing.

I'm still in the "gods what am I going to do with all my time? " phase at the moment, but given it wasn't my choice to give up yet, I'm surprised at how interested I am in finding an alternative sport. Pickleball and bowls have attractions, and as time sponges and social contacts, perhaps Rummikub and/or Mah Jong.

10 years ago I couldn't have even imagined writing this, but things move on after 44 years of multiple horse ownership.

I haven't achieved everything I wanted to, but I've achieved almost everything I'm capable of and could afford without a Euromillions win . It was a wild ride at times, but such fun. It's early days for me of course, but I don't think I'm going to be inconsolable at losing the love for horse owning. I feel nothing but relief that the van is sold and selling that feels very final.
.

 

[Crazy_cat_lady]

My saving grace is as my OH, while never dismissive and always supportive, loathed the things.
When my last boy was pts he was taking the fence down as he was being winched up the ramp, no more! No more!

I think mine was the same (really not helped when he leapt onto Oh foot when a rattly trailer went past - he was holding him while I locked the gate and it was one of those moments where I could tell what was about to happen but if I'd rushed to grab him would have scared him more - to his credit he clung on valiently . It was entirely my decision to give up, he accepted the horse came before him, however if I said I was getting another I think I'd be divorced

 

[JBM]

There are other things out there to engage the interest, which I am enjoying immensely.

Oh completely agree! I just enjoy being with animals so it’s the hobby that suits me

 

[Time for Tea]

An interesting side point of this thread is how some seem to imply there's no life worth living outside of horses?

Maybe it's because my life is driven partly by my own health and have finally learnt to adapt accordingly (or the five years in equestrian ops management) but I do wonder what would happen to someone, anyone, who suddenly couldn't ride or have horses that has this belief that horses are the be all and end all. While life is short and for living etc, it can also change overnight...

A friend (who without fail has at least one lesson a week, plus a clinic or extra as a non-owner) found the lockdowns absolute hell as she put SO much into her riding, she didn't know what to do to fill the void - sometimes all your eggs in one basket isn't necessarily a good thing.

It can be difficult to adjust, I am reducing my riding time and horsey time slowly, in fact I think I can adjust and dog walk, travel, play bridge etc, but it’s difficult when the ponies are all at home and my daughter is extremely keen, lives nearby and doesn’t want to sell any of them! Nor do I really, I just want to have more freedom. Forest ponies are cheap to keep so that’s a plus.

Sensible? Not really, but each step taken on the back of a good horse is ascending the stairway to heaven.

 

[ycbm]

Having been in both situations in recent years I would say there is an absolutely enormous difference in how "sensible" it is to keep horses depending on whether you do or don't have your own land and also whether that land is outside the kitchen door or a motor journey away.
.